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The night was young still, and even in the quiet, remote Kuchiki gardens, you could hear the faint and distant sounds of a party going on somewhere near eighth division. The moon was only beginning its monthly course, pale crescent in a sea of blinking stars, and the only real light piercing through the darkness was dimmed and coming from the windows of the master's chambers.
Like every other night since he'd grown old enough to understand the value of silence, Kuchiki Byakuya was walking along the ancient paths through the trees and flowers of his family's estate, finding peace in its soothing familiarity. Everything here was calm and relaxing, a haven in his world where ancestral rules, honor and war always took precedence over the simplest of pleasures. The sakura trees were in full bloom, coating the air with their sweet scent, and for a brief and rare moment, the head of the Kuchiki clan wondered if there was anything in this world important enough right now to take him away from this blissful feeling.
Strolling leisurely around a corner, he passed a beautiful and ever-growing mass of night-blooming jasmine that had been there long before he was even born ; its smell, so reminiscent of countless other moonlit promenades, not all of which were spent alone, sent his mind through the same melancholic memories it recalled every time he ventured on this side of the garden. Memories of easier times, when life didn't seem quite as dull... Lost in bittersweet recollections, he kept walking, his steps guiding him along well-known pathways until he reached the area he had been heading towards since the very beginning.
But, on the bench near the koi pond, half sprawled across the wooden seat with a hand skimming over the water surface as she murmured words only she could hear, sat a familiar figure that he wouldn't have expected to find here in a thousand years. Never before had he encountered anyone walking through the gardens in the middle of the night, let alone his adoptive sister, talking to herself.
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Rukia was starting to understand what her brother found so great about these midnight strolls through the gardens. Every night since she had been adopted into the family, she had heard him or felt his reiatsu pass by the windows of her chambers as he walked further away from the house. Some time ago, after a particularly stressful day, she had felt the need to find some semblance of peace, and taken her sulking to this remote place deep into the trees. There really was something to say about the relaxing effect of sitting near a pond in the moonlight.
She might not have been taking these walks for long, but was quickly getting addicted. Lost in the middle of the estate, far from the manor's stuffing atmosphere, the noises of Seireitei, and the overwhelming pressures of a noble slash shinigami's life, she found that the loneliness she usually cursed wasn't so choking here. It even felt... relaxing. Here, she was free of any and every obligation that had been piled upon her thin shoulders for too long. Hell, the place was so hidden that she could probably take off her yukata and dance naked around the pond without anyone ever knowing.
She wouldn't, of course. But just the knowledge that it could be considered a possibility always made her want to laugh out loud at the exhilarating feeling of freedom it gave her. Not that she would ever tell that to anyone, she didn't fancy dying of mortification.
In the short time she had been coming here, she had gotten sort of attached to the fish ; watching them swim in endless circles was soothing in a way. She couldn't really see their colors, but when the moon was high enough, she could almost make them out. There were countless different patterns on their scales, and she had taken to naming them ; after all, no harm could come from talking to carps, and it was much better than talking to herself.
She was in the process on complimenting a particularly large one when the sound of a throat clearing startled her out of her tirade. She jumped as her heart missed a beat and turned abruptly, very nearly falling from her perch on the wooden bench.
And there, in the faint light, free of his kenseikan and captain attire, stood her brother.
She wasn't used to seeing him dressed this way, almost casually, and she stared at him, blinking. He looked so... human. It only lasted a short moment though, before she caught herself.
In the split second it took her to realize the improper way she was currently slouching over her seat and the undignified picture she must have been making, she jumped to her feet and dropped into a formal bow to hide the flaming cheeks he probably couldn't see anyway, and tried to make herself somewhat presentable.
"Ni... Nii-sama!"
Dying of mortification was sounding more and more appealing at the moment.
*******
If he had been anyone else, he would probably have laughed at the image she presented. In all the years he had known her, he hadn't believed she could move quite so quickly ; the speed with which she had stood up and bowed was impressive, really, and he didn't need any light to guess the color of her face at the moment.
But as he held back the urge to smirk, he realized that he had probably interrupted her in her own quiet time, and wondered if it wouldn't be better to just continue on his way and leave her to own devices. She was embarrassed enough as it was, and he knew she was never quite at ease in his presence, something he had made sure would remain a fact for the first few decades since the family had adopted her. Keeping his distances, keeping her at arm's length if not further was the wise course of action, he had thought. That way, he wouldn't have to hear her laugh, to see her smile, to watch her do all the things her older sister had forgotten how to do herself when she had abandoned her as an infant.
Leaving her in the background, never directly in his line of vision, had been the only way he had found to tolerate her presence. Memories were treacherous beasts, that ate you from the inside out if you didn't keep them on a tight leash, and Rukia, despite herself, was prompt to make them resurface.
Now though...
Half a century had passed, and in the light of recent events, he was starting to wonder if maybe he had made a mistake. Companionship was a gift he had seldom been granted in his long life, his arrogance at first and then his fears keeping people at bay, and except for those five blissful years he would never forget, he couldn't recall a time when he hadn't been alone.
What were five years in a death god's life, really...
He had been raised to lead, to be an authority figure and to keep an iron grip on whatever emotion made it past the walls experience had raised around his heart ; he wasn't foolish enough to believe in eternal happiness, really. But sometimes, in his most contemplative moments, when he let himself take a closer look at his own life, he realized with a slight pang in his chest that he missed the presence of another human being by his side. He missed the comfort of having someone understand, and dig deeper under the surface to find the breaches in the smokescreen he showed to the rest of the world.
A pair of redheads had given him an inkling of what he was missing out on, and he couldn't help but wonder... had things been different, maybe he would have... but it was in the past now, and only a fool would linger on thoughts of what might have been.
It wasn't too late, was it?
And so he found himself standing there before his late wife's stuttering sister, the one that had longed for his acceptance for decades and that until recently he hadn't even been able to think about without beating himself up over past mistakes and promises, and he didn't know what to do. Should he leave? Say something? Incline his head and bid her goodnight before going back to his chambers to wonder why he didn't take a step forward and seize this occasion to put a final stop to years of awkwardness and mutual fear?
If there was one thing in the universe Kuchiki Byakuya wasn't good at, it was at making these sorts of decisions.
He had no idea what to say to her, having never been all that interested in what she did, and what little people skills he might have had when he was younger had long ago been drowned under obligations and protocols. For once in his long life, he was completely at a loss.
"Nii-sama? Is everything alright?"
The sound of her concerned voice snapped him out of his musings. She had taken a step forward herself and was watching him warily, as if looking for a sign or a clue as to what he was thinking. Her back was stiff as a board as she obviously struggled to keep a proper posture, and he could sense her need to fidget and her urge to cut through the awkward silence. He made his choice.
Bracing himself, he took a silent breath. "Were they responding?"
*******
Rukia was quite sure she hadn't heard right. She had honestly thought that upon finding her in this part of the gardens, he would just utter a few words of dismissal and leave, or maybe ask that she go back to her bedroom and sleep.
But she would never have expected him to start a conversation. Or was it even what he was doing? What was he talking about? The question made no sense...
There were too many thoughts and questions swirling through her mind to even formulate any, and in her panic that she wouldn't be able to find a suitable answer, her mouth opened on its own accord to utter the only sound it seemed to be able to make in this kind of situation.
"Eh?"
Her brain was too busy trying to process his words to worry about what she must look like.
Byakuya stared at her for a second, before averting his eyes. "The fish... you seemed to be deeply immersed in conversation just a moment ago," he said in his deep, quiet voice.
*******
It was harder than he thought it would be. He didn't know what possessed him to say such a thing, and it had seemed appropriate for a short, insane second, but now she was only gaping at him, looking for all the world like one of the carps she had been talking to.
It only lasted a moment though, and it wasn't long before her flabbergasted expression relaxed into a small smile, and she shook her head, letting out a nervous chuckle. "I, uh... I was hoping they would, but so far, no such luck," she replied. Her posture had relaxed a little, even if she still seemed on edge. Her fingers were twitching every time she took a breath, and he suddenly felt ashamed. What had he done, all those years?
There was a short silence. He had no idea what to add to this, and was starting to feel out of his league and a little uneasy when she shrugged, a sheepish look on her face, and waved a hand towards the pond. "But... I think they're starting to like me."
And just like that, something, maybe the ice, broke and it didn't seem quite so hard to get to know her anymore. She had thrown him a rope, understanding on some level what he was trying to do, and he decided to grab it, like a drowning man trying to come out of the troubled waters his life had become.
He still didn't know if hers was a companionship he deserved, but his lips stretched into a small, rare smile, and her own widened at the sight of it. Was it that easy, really? To get her to smile the way she did when she was with his lieutenant or their ryoka friends?
"It is getting late," he started, his expression still softened, "would you like for me to walk you back to your chambers?"
She bowed her head, smiling. "I would like that very much, nii-sama."
Maybe it was the night, or the peaceful atmosphere, and maybe tomorrow they would be back to their formal relationship ; but right now, as she took his arm and they both walked back to the house in companionable silence, he thought that mending the bridges she had tried for decades to build between the two of them, only to find her every attempt thwarted by his coldness, would certainly be a long process, but that perhaps, just perhaps, they would enjoy every minute of it.