Chapter Text
“I don’t know, Dennis, are you sure this isn’t gay?”
Dennis furrowed his brow and even in the dim light of Paddy’s Y2K bunker, Mac could tell he was getting frustrated. Dennis had caught him off-guard this morning, ushering him down the stairs to the dank basement for another one of his ridiculous “survival drills”. Although, this time the task didn’t involve stacking cans or target practice. This time Mac had been asked to do something much more… intimate.
“Gay? There’s nothing gay about it Mac!”, Dennis responded, exasperated, “In the event where we find ourselves cut off from civilization in a time of crisis, and I, for whatever reason, can’t persuade a few busty young women to join us in time, we have to be ready to tend to each others’ erotic needs.”
Mac was unconvinced, and frankly, confused. He had to get out of this, get out of here but something inside him was begging for an excuse, praying for another well-constructed rationalization to plunge into temptation, just this once.
“Okay, but this isn’t the apocalypse yet, dude. Why are we doing this now?”
Dennis gripped Mac’s arms and his eyes got that intense look as they bore into him.
“Preparedness, Mac. We have to practice now so that when the time comes, we know how to deeply satisfy one another. Dammit, we’ll never survive a nuclear holocaust if we can’t even manage to get each other off!” He leaned in closer, and his voice became breathy. Mac could feel his heart pounding and his guts churning. It made him sick how bad he wanted this. It was almost more than he could handle.
“But you and me, Mac, we’re going to do more than just survive. We’re going to thrive. We’re going to emerge from the ashes and raise humanity into a new golden era! We’re going to be gods, Mac. Heroes.” Dennis snaked his fingertips along Mac’s neck and brought his lips just barely against his ear, which Mac could feel turning red already. With a sly smile, he whispered, “You want to be a hero, don’t you?”
“H-hell yeah, bro.” Mac couldn’t find the air to push the words out. His hands, clammy and totally not trembling, meandered blindly until they came to perch on Dennis’ slender hips. Dennis, in reply, knitted his digits through his blood brother’s pristinely slicked hair, clenching them into fists as he pulled him into a kiss. Mac pressed into the hot mess of lips and tongues. He reached down clutched Dennis' ass for dear life. Mac felt like he was falling and flying at the same time. Hips bucked, shirts unbuttoned, Dennis gasped for air. Mac, forgetting his own strength, shoved the two of them against one of the shelves, knocking a pickle jar onto the floor.
The pair followed suit. Mac greedily sucked at Dennis' neck as they crumpled together onto the concrete floors.
"Mac wait-- I brought something for this."
Mac watched him quickly peel his jeans off and grab an enormous bottle from the bottom shelf. He couldn't help but ogle the man's amazing thighs. What he wouldn't give to get his face in between them…
"This is a five year supply of lube, baby boy. Would you like to do the honors?"
Mac prayed that God couldn't see him slathering lubricant onto his best friend's asshole. He prayed that in the dark subterranean cellar, the Lord couldn't see how rock fucking hard he was when he entered him. He hoped that Jesus and all the angels couldn't see the expression on Dennis' face or hear the moan that bubbled past his lips and get jealous of how much they looked and felt like heaven. He tossed the bottle begind him without even bothering to unscrew it.
Mac eagerly pushed himself deeper into the slick baking heat of Dennis' body. He paused and shut his eyes, soaking in the sensation as if this really were the end of the world, and this might truly be the last time he'd find himself with his blood brother tight and hot around his cock.
Dennis interrupted with an impatient whimper, his hips thrust up from the floor practically begging Mac to destroy him. Mac flashed a big gay smile. He pulled back and slammed straight into him with an audible smack, knocking a loud moan out of Dennis.
"Atta boy, Mac." Dennis pulled him down for a sloppy kiss, his voice a murmur and his whole body rocking from the slow and steady pounding. "Bang me like the sky is falling!"
The encouragement did not go unnoticed. Mac quickened the pace of his plowing. Lightheaded, he buried his face into Dennis' chest his and peppered his nipples with gentle little kisses. Dennis had the sweetest pecs. The salty brine of his glass hard nips combined with the slimy oozing squelch of penetration was driving Mac wild. He grunted as he felt the viscous goo dribble and bubble out of Dennis' sweet anus. The puckered orifice was utterly defenseless against the vigorous onslaught of cock. Mac felt in that moment that God had made this hole just for him to fill. On the other hand, maybe Dennis' aching cries of "Ohhhh God, Mac, you're such a badass." Was the siren song of temptation, and he was going to be dragged down to hell. Mac didn't have the vocabulary to describe these feelings, but if Dennis helped him, he would call it irresistibly depraved.
"Ohh fuck, Dennis, I'm really close" Dennis held tight to Macs back like it was all he could do to keep his body from breaking to pieces. And frankly, judging by the way Dennis shook like a leaf every time Mac's eager throbbing bird pierced his slender form, he wouldn't be surprised if he did.
Mac was spilling over the edge. Biting the other man's beautiful lips, Dennis murmured into his open mouth.
"Give it to me, baby boy, I need it."
That did it. Mac came like geyser, hot and fast and arguably one of our nations finest natural treasures. It was divine ecstasy, the likes of which he had only dreamt of. This was immediately followed by Dennis, who filled the gap between them with a fresh coat of his very own sticky dude-sludge and dragging his nails down the length of Mac's back.
When the two of them were through panting and sweating, they lay there for a while. Legs entwined, Mac and Dennis were wrapped in each other on the unforgiving concrete. Dennis was the first to break their cuddled silence.
"So how would you rate this drill?" Mac rolled over to face him.
"Hmmm... It was okay, I guess..."
Dennis sounded wounded. "Just 'okay'?!"
"Shit, no dude it was great it's just…" Mac took a deep breath, "I think we need more practice. Y'know... to make sure we're doing it right when-- if the time comes."
Dennis raised his eyebrows and met Mac's gaze, understanding.
"Ohhh well, obviously. Practice makes perfect, bro."
"Yeah, I mean we can't just leave it to chance, can we? This is survival we're talking about!"
"Oh god, no. That would be downright irresponsible! We should have another drill next week... or sooner..."
"The sooner the better, bro."
Mac heaved a contented sigh and nuzzled into the crook of Dennis' neck. He couldn't wait for the apocalypse.