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Clara walked through the doors of the TARDIS for what she would come to realise later would be the final time. She was terrified at losing her doctor, so terrified that it over ruled any relief she may have felt at him surviving the final dalek attack on Trenzalore. Just as she began to think that she was wrong and he hadn’t come back to his beloved ship she heard heavy footsteps on stairs, footsteps of a tired old man who was finished with the world. She turned around slowly and there he was. Her Doctor. Always her Doctor.
‘Doctor’ she called out her quiet voice surprisingly loud in the silent TARDIS.
‘Hello’ he replied with that secret sad smile she knew all to well.
‘You’re ok. You’re young again. Didn’t even change your face’ her voice couldn’t hide her delight.
‘No. Well I wouldn’t change this time would I? No point if your just going to die again.’
It took her a moment to register what he’d just said. ‘What do you mean die again. Didn’t the Time Lords just save you?’
He turned to walk away from her.
‘ Doctor. Doctor answer me!’
He slowly turned back to her. ‘Oh Clara, wonderful wonderful Clara. Don’t you see. This is the end for me. They gave me enough to defeat the daleks and save the town, even gave me enough to let out an energy signature strong enough for them to latch on to so that they could travel back to our Universe. Always were a selfish bunch’ he scoffed. ‘But they didn’t give me enough to regenerate properly or even carry on living. So this is it for me I’m afraid. End of the line, the final hour, the last page.’
‘No’ she cried in outrage. Couldn’t he see that the universe still needed him, that she still needed him. ‘No your the Doctor you can’t just die. You’ve got a plan I know you do. You’ve always got a plan....’
At the resigned look on his face she began to sob. Seeing her so distressed he felt a pang right in-between his hearts. He rushed forward to put his arms around her, ‘ No come on now don’t cry. It’s the way it’s got be I’m afraid. I’m two thousand years old now. That’s two thousand years worth of loss. I think at long last I deserve some peace don’t you?’ he asked hopefully. ‘I have done some horrible things throughout my life and I haven’t always been a good man. But I had hoped that I would have done enough good to balance out the bad. And as foolish as it may seem I had hoped that that would mean that I finally get my happy ending’
She glanced up at her friend. At the tear tracks on her face he felt a deep sense of guilt but at her next words the weight of the feeling lifted. ‘Of course you deserve happiness. I couldn’t think of anyone who deserves it more and I’m sure the universe would agree.’ He smiled. ‘But there’s really no way for you to go on living?’
He shook his head, ‘ There’s not. My death it seems is a fixed point in time. Again. My grave is on Trenzalore and I can’t change that. Not that I’d want to thinking about it. Oh that’s a wired feeling. Being content with dying that is, my last face was riddled with worry about it like a Swiss cheese. No not like a Swiss cheese forget I said that.’
By this time the Doctor was racing round the console room flipping levers left right and centre. A loud bang resonated through out the ship as it jolted and the travellers inside had to hold on tight. ‘Oops sorry about that. I never did quite get the landing right. My Mrs would have had a few things to say about that you know.’
Clara nodded remembering the intimidating woman with what she had decided to call space hair. She seemed like the sort of woman to speak her mind and excel at everything. Clara couldn’t help but feeling a twinge of jealousy at the mysterious woman he spoke of so fondly but she quickly brushed it aside knowing it didn’t matter. There was more important things to focus on. Like how to say goodbye. The doctor was currently fidgeting on the other side of the console trying to work up the courage to say what needed to be said. He really did hate goodbyes he thought. They pair made eye contact and slowly walked towards each other trying to draw out the moment.
Taking a shaky deep breath Clara opened her mouth and began the hardest conversation of her life. ‘Before we say anything else and I start crying again I would just like to say thank you. Thank you for letting me come with you. Thank you for choosing to travel with me over all of those other better qualified and far more amazing people. I have lived every single minute of it and even knowing what I know now of how it will end I would do it all again.’
‘Me too Clara me too’
'I will miss you doctor don’t forget that . You will be missed. You and your huge chin and no eyebrows and ability to speak at a million miles an hour.’ At this he looked slight affronted and she couldn’t help but giggle at the disgruntled expression on his face which helped to lift his spirits. ‘I have had the time of my life and I will remember you until the day I die. And I promise to tell your story to the family I will have one day, and they will tell the story to their families so that your name and deeds live on’
‘Thank you Clara you don’t know what that means to me. When you found me I was in a dark place. Darker than I have ever been before having lost all that I loved and I could no longer see the good in the universe or the light in it. You helped me to see that again. So thank you.’ He looked her right in eye and memorised her features for the last time ‘Goodbye, my impossible girl’ she threw her arms around him ‘Goodbye my doctor'. With the little energy she had left Clara Oswald walked to the doors one last time. Turning around with a half smile ‘ Run you clever boy, and remember'
In a new York brown house in late 1950’s America and envelope of TARDIS blue was posted through the door.
A lady with red hair idly walked to pick it up but rushed once she saw the colour hoping against hope that it was from the Doctor. Tearing open the paper she realised it was but her excitement quickly faded away as she read the words written there.
‘Hello old friends, and here we are you and me on the last page. By the time you read this the likelihood is that I will be long gone but I can’t bring myself to do so without saying goodbye to you my ponds. Amelia, you were the first face this face saw and you brought me hope and in a time when I didn’t know who I was anymore, reminded me of my purpose. Not a hero, or a warrior or even a survivor but a doctor, making people better and healing their problems. My little Amelia Pond you are everything that I have tried to base myself on: bright, energetic, hopeful and so willing to see the best in everyone and everything you meet. I hope that i have succeeded with that, even if only a little.
Rory the Roman, the first time we met I thought it would be the last, it is rare that when I take a companion with me that their significant other comes along too. See I’m a selfish old man and I don’t like sharing the attention but I have never once regretted bringing you along. You were the third piece to the puzzle that I didn’t realise we needed. A calm, logical and patient figure to balance your wife and I out. I think you might be the best man I’ve ever known and I’m truly lucky to have known you.
I’m afraid I have one last confession before I go. A long, long time ago on an asteroid oh so very far away I promised you that I would always look after your daughter and I’m afraid that I lied. The first time I met her she died saving 4022 people from the Vashta Nerada. Carnivorous Shadows. My previous self then uploaded her consciousness to the largest computer data base in the universe so she could live on safe forever. I have been a coward and since the day I said goodbye to her last and sent her off to her death I have not been to see her. I hope that she finds it in herself to forgive me for that’s where I’m headed next. Upon my death I’ll upload my consciousness beside hers in the hope that we may find peace together in our final resting place. I am now two thousand years old and as much as I loath to say it I am tired. Do not worry I have not been alone, I found another companion like you told me to. I am quite ready to say goodbye now. So goodbye my Ponds, my Williams', my Family.
Yours with love the raggedy doctor'
When a man came home that night content with the knowledge of a good days work he found his wife in tears on the floor. Lovingly wrapping his arms around her he took the letter from her frozen hand. Reading the words her realised the problem. No words were needed so they just held each other and said their own private farewells to their old friend.
A sad young man who was actually rather old walked around his ship to say his final and hardest farewell.
‘Well this it old girl we’ve had quite the run haven’t we. All those years ago on Gallifrey when we stole off together to see the stars who would have thought that we’d end up here. My oldest, loyalist and most beloved companion. We’ve had some good times haven’t we. Oh the lonely old man and a box of the bluest blue ever seen, the adventures we've lived eh. Someone once told me that the sound you make brings hope wherever we go. I rather like the sound of that don’t you. The universe’s great hope. Ha. More like the universe’s biggest pest.’
He looked around at the ship that had been his home for the past 16 centuries in what felt like despair. ‘We don’t really need to say goodbye do we. We understand each other well enough that that’s no longer necessary. We already know what the other would say. You are an essential part of me. A mad man and his box. Always together through a bond that nothing could ever break. One does not make sense without the other. So take me to where I need to go one last time and then I trust you can find your way to where you must end up’ he said with a shudder remembering the field on Trenzalore where his grave is or will be located.
Inside the largest computer data base in the universe inside the largest library in the universe a funny looking man with a big chin and gangly limbs woke up. He checked arms, legs, nose, bowtie they were all there. He was on top of a small hill looking down into the valley below him where a curvy woman with incredible hair sat hunched over a blue book. The oncoming storm bounded down the hill like an eager puppy almost falling over in his haste to get to her. ‘Hi honey I’m home’ he smiled.
‘And what sort of time do you call this’ came the harsh reply.
The doctor frowned, he had hoped she’d be happy to see him. ‘You don’t seem very surprised to see me?’
‘Charlotte told me of your intentions to upload yourself here with me’ River turned around and the breath caught in his lungs. She looked exactly as he remembered with her golden skin, a strong nose with a bump in it that he just wanted to bop and that amazing mass of hair that seemed to go on for ever. ‘Why did you come here sweetie?’
He looked at her confused, ‘I’m dead. Where else would I rather spend my afterlife than with my wife who I love and miss?’
‘Love and miss huh. You’ve got a funny way of showing it.’
‘Well I do and to prove it I’m not just staying here forever but I’ve given CAL an update so not only can her mind hold both of us but also....’ the mad man grabbed her hand and pulled her up the hill. ‘Is that a TARDIS?’ River asked. ‘Yep. But it’s not just a TARDIS. It’s a perfect replica of my TARDIS that can help us travel round the perfect replica of the universe that I just installed. All of it’s the exact same. The people, the places, the events.’ He looked at River stroking the curve in her nose,' the prisons. Cool huh.’
‘Well you have certainly put a lot of work into it.’ She replied still sounding rather unimpressed
‘Well yeah but that doesn’t matter because its still cool!’ He tried (and failed) to adapt a casual air ‘So what do you say Professor Song want to run away with me and see the universe?’
River just looked at him thinking. ‘ You know I really aught to be very mad at you.’
‘Well then isn’t it a good thing you’ve never been very good at doing what you aught.’
‘ That is true. I always have enjoyed misbehaving.’
‘ I’ve noticed.’
‘Oh I know you’ve noticed’
‘So then what will it be then my bespoke psychopath. Stay here and live a normal life filled with bedtime stories, school runs and trips to the park at the weekend...’
‘Or....’
‘Or travel with me. Forever.’
She raised an one eyebrow, which he instantly felt jealous of her ability to do so, and smiled.’ Forever is an awfully long time Sweetie.’
‘Well then dear isn’t it a good thing that I’m a Time Lord and we’re excellent with time.’ He snapped his fingers opening up the doors of the TARDIS and reached out an arm towards her,' So what do you say time and space.’
She took his hand and curled up one corner of her lips into a wicked smirk and finished off ' You watch us run'
‘And so the healer and the assassin travelled together through the stars inside a little blue box that’s bigger on the inside seeking out a never ending series of adventures and trouble all from the safety of computer in a library guarded by silence and shadows. The end’ the old man who was not really that old at all but who like to pretend kissed his granddaughter's forehead and got up to leave.
‘So they lived happily ever after' a small voice followed him.
He turned back around, ' You know sometimes a happy ending doesn’t mean happily ever after it just means time.’
At the unimpressed look on the girl’s face he rapidly changed his answer to ' Yes yes they lived happily ever after' earning him a beaming smile. '
'Grandfather I want to see the stars up close some day.’
‘ Yes little one so do I ' he sighed wishfully.
‘ Perhaps one day we can steal a TARDIS just like the lonely traveller and run away to see the universe!’ she squeaked excitedly.
‘ No of course not stealing is wrong you know that. But I tell you what if you’re a good girl when you’re older we’ll Borrow a TARDIS and go visit a couple of planets before being back in time for tea. I’ve always wanted to see earth up close and meet some real humans. Must be rather pathetic only having one heart don’t you think? Now off you go now to sleep. Night night, sweet dreams, don’t let the toclavane bite.’
‘ Goodnight grandfather.’
‘ Goodnight Susan’
And the song of a mad man and his box continues to be heard through all of time and space