Archive of Our Own ^beta

"You know, there's just something about all this that gives me the heebie jeebies, Harrington." Billy's voice was low, dangerous. Steve could have killed those idiots for being nosy, how hard was it to hide for ten seconds? Billy was unpredictable at the best of times but he was on edge tonight, even more then usual. His fingers twitched, his blue eyes were bright with something that Steve couldn't name, didn't want too. But they didn't have time for this, Billy was the least of their fucking problems. 

"Oh yeah, how's that?" said Steve. Something shifted in the trees and he wished he had bought his bat out, he couldn't tell if there was something out there, or if he was just imagining it. 

"My thirteen year old sister is missing all day and where do I find her? Here, with you, and a bunch of other kids at some strangers house-" There it was again, something moved out there. Billy didn't notice, didn't care. He was still talking, but Steve hardly even heard the words now. His heart beat fast, and he held his breath as there was another sound, closer this time. Something was getting closer, and if it was what he thought then- "Harrington!" snapped Billy, eyes flashing. His hand shot out and grabbed him by his jacket, dragged him closer. Billy let out a puff of smoke, and Steve could practically feel his anger, his rage. Steve didn't think it could have been about this, about Max sneaking out, but they weren't close enough for him to ask. "Are you even fucking listening to me?" 

There was a snarl, then and Steve felt his breath stutter, the blood drain from his face. "Billy," said Steve, carefully, desperately. The guy might have been an asshole but he didn't want to see him die, didn't want to see him get torn apart by a demodog. Just the thought of that alone made him shudder, made him feel sick. Steve gripped his arm, his nails digging in, he could see them now, two of them. Steve should never have gone outside without a weapon, if something happened it would be his fault. "Billy, we need to go inside." 

He could see that Billy was just confused now. He had come here looking for a fight, and Steve probably would have given it to him, but this changed things. "Harrington, what the fuck-" 

"Steve!" Dustin called, through the window. The demodogs were eyeing them warily, inching closer. Steve tried not to make eye contact, feared that the moment he did they would attack. He took a step back, pulling Billy with him. 

"There is weird shit going on," said Steve, quickly. "But not what you think-" He took a moment to shoot Billy a glare, hoped it looked offended and not downright terrified. "Which is fucking messed up by the way." 

The demodog made a noise, and Steve's grip on Billy tightened. Even he heard it this time, his head turning to take a look. Steve stopped him before he could, a hand on his jaw. Billy raised an eyebrow, but sensed danger well enough not to argue. "Didn't think you swung that way, Harrington. If you wanted a quick fuck you could have just asked," he said, lightly, a grin on his face. His mood changed fast enough to give Steve whiplash. It was enough to make him loosen his grip though, a smile to tug at his lips. 

"You're an asshole, Hargrove." 

The grin widened, "I know." 

And then the door slammed open, shattering the calm. A demodog launched itself at them, and Steve shoved Billy towards the house without thinking. They were fast, but the house was close, so close, if they could just get inside, get their hands on something to fight with. Billy had come looking for a fight, he was going to get one. Mike hovered closest to the door, bat in hand. Billy took one look at it, snatched it from his grip and turned back around. Steve remembered when he was in this house, when he had just come looking for Nancy and Jonathan, when he had been dragged into all of this. Now, the same thing was happening to Billy. He wasn't panicking though, not like Steve was. No, he had fire in his eyes and a fucking grin spread across his face as he got his first hit in. Steve paused for longer then he should have, just watching him. His tanned skin glistened with sweat, his muscles rippled, he was so fucking strong but Steve already knew that, had defended against him on the court. The demodog had no chance, not against Billy. 

"Steve, here!" yelled Dustin, throwing him a crowbar, just as the other dog tried to attack Billy from behind, it's mouth open wide, the rows and rows of teeth glinting in the moonlight. Steve tried not to think about if for too long as he swung. It made a wounded noise, but not enough for it to stop. It threw itself at him again, and Billy was there.

Between the two of them, they made easy work of it. Steve fell back onto the front steps, breathing heavily. Fuck, he was tired. 

"Holy shit," breathed Max, her eyes wide. 

Billy spun around, eyes narrowed. "Watch your fucking language, Maxine," he said, sharply. He pointed the bat at her, "What the fuck is going on?" 

Steve laughed, it probably wasn't a good time, probably sounded a little unhinged. "Welcome to Hawkins, amigo." 

"We can explain," said Max, quickly. 

"Oh, really? Seems I told you to stay away from this one," said Billy, turning a dark look to Lucas. "Now look at all the shit you're in. What the fuck was that?" 

"Demodog," said Dustin, and Steve rolled his eyes. 

"Look, long story short," said Steve, tiredly. "Monsters exist, they come from this other universe and they've been breaking through because the science lab opened a fucking gate. Experimented on kids too, but yeah, opened a gate. Did you hear about Will Byers going missing last year? Yeah, he was in the Upside Down-" 

"That's what we call it," added Lucas, though he still eyes Billy, warily. 

"Got him back, nearly died. Barb died, in my pool, at a party. Dustin found some kind of lizard, turned out to be a baby demogorgon that ate his cat. All these monsters and shit are controlled by the Mind Flayer, apparently. We figure if we kill it, kill the brain, then all of them should just die. Problem is, there's a bit of the Flayer in Will so they've gone to try and sweat it out of him, it fucking hates the heat and then El will close the gate, shut off the brain, and goodbye monsters." Billy blinked at him and Steve met his gaze, "So yeah, weird shit, Hargrove and now, lucky you, you're involved. Congratulations, welcome to the babysitting club." 

"We don't have time for this!" yelled Mike, "We have to go into the tunnels and draw the rest of the demodogs away, most of them have gone to protect the gate, El won't be able to deal with them all!" 

"I already said no to this plan," said Steve. "No, absolutely not, we're staying here." 

"They already found us once," said Dustin, "They could find us again and we might not be as prepared next time." 

"No-"

"We can help!" said Lucas.

Steve groaned, rubbed a hand over his face. His head was pounding, he just wanted to curl up and go to sleep. It had been a long night, and Billy was still staring at him with those blue eyes of his. They were so blue, how was it even possible?

"It'll be easy," added Dustin. "We go down there, burn the shit out of it and then get out."

"Dustin-"

"It'll be fine, Steve! Come on, we have to do something, we can't just sit here!"

"If they can't close the gate-" started Max. 

"HEY!" roared Billy, suddenly. The kids jumped and Steve closed his eyes again. "Can you shitbirds shut up for three seconds? What are they talking about, Harrington?" 

Dustin opened his mouth, "We think we-" 

"Not you, I'm talking to Mother Hen, here," said Billy, looking at Steve, pointedly. He was leaning against the bat now, that angry energy he had once had long gone. He didn't even glare at Lucas anymore, didn't seem to care. His attention was fixed solely on Steve, and Steve met it easily. "What are they talking about?" 

Steve sighed, "They think they have an idea to draw the demodogs away from the gate, give El a chance to close it end this." 

"We do have an idea," insisted Mike, "One that will work." 

"We know the Mind Flayer is vulnerable to heat and fire, there are tunnels that it's created under the town and there is a way in. These idiots want to go in there, find the hub, burn it and hope that the demodogs come to protect it. They will, and then we'll get torn apart. Or maybe they won't, but we don't make it out in time and we still all die." Steve shook his head, "No, it's not fucking happening." 

They all started talking at once then, yelling, shouting. Steve tried to get a word in but none of them were having it, Dustin thought it was a foolproof plan, that they would get in and out and it would be easy. Mike was yelling, reluctant to leave El to do this on her own. Lucas and Max just wanted to help but they were kids for fuck's sake, it was dangerous. Steve didn't want to be responsible for their deaths, he couldn't, he would never forgive himself if something happened to them- 

"I'll do it," said Billy. 

The kids fell silent in an instant, Max's mouth fell open. She blinked, once, twice and then shook her head, "Billy, you can't!" It was the first time Steve had ever heard her worry after her brother, or something similar to it at least. Billy looked at her, his head tilted to the side. He still had a grin on his face, but this one was soft around the edges. 

"Better then you idiots getting yourselves killed," said Billy, with a shrug. "Tell me where to go, give me one of those stupid radios and guide me. Sounds like a good night out if you ask me." He spun the bat in his hand, a gleam in his eye. Maybe he still needed to hit something, maybe he still needed to fight. Steve would rather he hit him then go on some kind of suicide mission. 

"You'll get yourself killed," said Steve, shaking his head. "You don't need to do shit, Billy. You shouldn't even be involved in any of this!" 

"So little faith in me, Princess? Come on, I won't die that easily." Something dark crossed his face, and Steve could tell that Max saw it, could see the pained look in her eyes before, both of them, simultaneously, shut it down. 

"Billy," said Max, quietly. 

"I won't die, Maxine," said Billy, rolling his eyes. "It's been a shit fucking night and I would really like another go with this bat. Harrington isn't going to budge on this, but Harrington hasn't got a say on what I do." 

"Try me," snapped Steve, on his feet before he could have time to think about it. He was the one crowding Billy this time, stepping into his space. Billy's grin only widened, the bastard looked pleased. "You're not going down into the tunnels, Billy. Least of all on your fucking own." He grabbed the bat, but Billy's grip on it tightened. "It's mine, give it back, asshole." 

"Look at you, there he is, King Steve," said Billy, amused. "You're planting your feet and everything. What do you care if I go into the tunnels? I'm not some kid you're babysitting, sweetheart." 

"Because you don't need too!"

"Not your call." 

"Enough!" yelled Mike, "I can tell you where to go, we can take your car. Steve doesn't have to come if he doesn't want too." 

"Mike!" Steve hissed, glaring at him. Mike glared back, already halfway to the Camaro. He had cans of gasoline in his hand, when the fuck had he had the time to find them? Dustin hesitated, before he, Max and even Lucas followed. Even fucking Lucas was going to get in Billy's car, let him go into those damn tunnels. He didn't fail to notice that their bags were filled with goggles and towels and gloves. Billy tugged on the bat and Steve let it go, reluctantly. 

"Looks like I win, Harrington," said Billy. He winked, drifting towards the Camaro. "I'll let you know how it all goes, shall I?" 

"Fuck you," growled Steve, he snatched the crowbar up from the ground and stomped after them. He didn't want to do this, he didn't want them to do this but he couldn't sit by. Couldn't they see he just wanted them to be fucking safe? The Chief was going to be pissed when he found out. Max sat in the front seat, but one look from Steve and she scrambled in the back. It was a tight fit, but Steve was too angry to care as he slammed the door shut behind him. 

"Hey, watch the car, Harrington," warned Billy. He still had that hint of amusement in his voice, Steve hated it. 

"Just drive, dickhead." 

"Oh my god," said Dustin, practically falling out of the car and onto the ground. "Never again, I'm never getting into a car with that crazy bastard again." 

Billy rolled his eyes as he got out, Steve thought he was remarkably calm given what was meant to happen next. Steve peered into the hole the Chief had dug, frowning. "My driving is your biggest concern right now, kid?" Billy shoved Steve aside, lightly, peering down into the hole. It was dark, and Steve could already smell the stench of something that just- wasn't quite right. "Doesn't look that bad," voiced Billy. God, he sounded so casual about all of this. Like he hadn't just volunteered for a life or death mission, like he wasn't following a bunch of kids that an hour ago he had come to intimidate. Billy grinned again, patting Steve in the shoulder. "Don't look so worried, Princess, this'll be fun. And here I thought Hawkins was boring." 

"Billy..." 

The grin dropped off of his face fast, when he looked behind him. Steve followed his gaze, the kids were all standing there, their goggles and gloves on, towels and cloths covering their faces. That wasn't the look of a bunch of kids that just intended to sit back and let someone else do the work for them. Steve sighed, Billy practically growled. 

"What the fuck is this?" he spat out, waving a hand at the four of them. "I thought we had a deal." 

"We never actually made any promises," started Dustin, and Billy glared at him. Dustin flinched back, shuffled a bit so that Max was in front of him. 

"We're not letting you go in there alone, Billy," said Max, her hands on her hips, her eyes blazing. "No fucking way." 

"Language," he hissed. Steve watched his fingers clench around the bat, his muscles tensing. "Look, if anything happens to me it's not going to be a problem-" 

"It's a problem for me!" Max yelled. 

Billy froze, his eyes widening. Steve wasn't sure he had ever seen him look so surprised, so genuine. It twisted something inside him that it was at the idea that someone, his fucking little sister, might care if he was torn to pieces by monsters he shouldn't have known anything about. 

"I'm going with him," said Steve, his voice breaking through the heavy atmosphere. Billy still stared at Max like he couldn't believe it and Max was still staring back, her chin up, her eyes hard and stubborn. For two siblings that weren't blood related they sure as hell acted like they were. "If we're going to do this, you're all going to stay up here." 

"No-"

"Steve-"

"That's not fair-"

"SHUT UP!" he yelled, crawling out of the hole to grab a pair of googles, gloves and towels. He shoved a set into Billy's hands, pulling them on himself. "It's dangerous down there, you could literally die. Do you think I want that on my head?" 

"But it's okay for you two?" said Dustin, incredulously. "That's bullshit, besides you'll get lost." 

"We won't get lost." He snatched the map out of Mike's hands. "We have a map." 

"You either take us with you, or we follow once you're already gone and then you can't keep an eye on us," said Mike, snatching the map back as Lucas set up a rope and threw it down the hole. "Your call." 

Steve ground his teeth, Billy threw his hands up in the air. "This is fucking ridiculous," he spat out. 

"Fine," snapped Steve, "But you fucking listen to us down there, do you understand me?" He didn't know when he and Billy had started being an 'us' but that was just where they were in all this. If he minded, he didn't say anything. 

"Deal," said Dustin, grinning from ear to ear. 

Steve was beginning to wish he had just kicked the kids out of the car and gone with Billy and that would have been the end of it. As if they were just going to let them go down there, as if they weren't going to do everything in their power to help. Billy wasn't happy about it, but he seemed to sense a losing battle as much as Steve did. He shoved Mike aside before he could even think about going down first and disappeared into the hole. Steve took a breath as Max, Mike, Dustin and Lucas followed, and then jumped down with them. 

The air was heavy and uncomfortable, a chill seeping down his spine. White flecks of dust? Plant? It didn't matter, it floated around them, slow and eerie. It was quiet, too. He didn't like it, there was a wrongness about it all. Steve knew that their world was just out that hole, he could almost see the stars if he looked close enough but it all felt so far away. Mike was already looking at his map, determining the right way to go. Steve snatched it from him (again) before he could even try and take the lead. There was no fucking way that was happening, not in a million years. He still had that voice in his head telling him this was a bad idea, telling him he should have been stronger, made the kids stay up above, but it was too late for all of that. They were down there now, all Steve could do was get them in and out as fast as fucking possible. 

He half-expected Billy to try and take the lead but he stayed at his shoulder instead, swinging his bat menacingly, eyes focused. Steve never thought he would be glad to have Billy Hargrove at his side but it was reassuring feeling the heat of him at his shoulder, grumbling about looking after a bunch of kids, teasing Steve for being "a mother hen". 

The place was a fucking a labyrinth, even with a poorly drawn out map Steve was terrified of getting them lost, of something happening. Dustin had already given him a fucking a heart attack already, falling behind for long enough to breathe in something he shouldn't have. Whatever it was, it didn't seem to have effected him. Not yet, anyway. The walls moved around them, pulsing with life. It reminded him that these weren't just tunnels, this was an actual, living, thing. 

Steve felt no relief at getting to the hub, at setting the damn thing alight. He knew that all it meant was that they had just set a target on themselves. The demodogs were coming, and they were coming for them. Dustin might have been able to talk his way around Dart, but that was just one demodog, the rest wouldn't look at him so fondly. No, they would kill him. They were coming, Steve could fucking hear them, their snarls echoing through the tunnels, closing in on them. Billy already had Max up and out of the hole before Steve could even blink. They were getting closer, getting louder. Billy boosted Lucas, and then Mike- they were yelling, their hands reaching back in, desperately. But it was too late, they had found them. 

Billy already had the bat, covered Steve long enough for him to lift Dustin and practically shove him outside. There was no time for either one of them, but at least the kids were out- at least they were safe. Steve could hear the pounding feet of the demodogs, there were so many of them, maybe they would die quickly? Maybe the more the better? Steve was vaguely aware of Billy standing in front of him now, staring down a fucking hoard on his own. 

"Come on motherfuckers," he muttered, as the first of them appeared, as they snarled and ran at them. "Let's fucking go." 

Max was screaming, Dustin too and then- and then it was over. Billy never got a chance to swing because the demodogs kept running, every single one, not even sparing either one of them a glance. Steve didn't realise he had gotten closer to Billy until he looked at his hands, clinging to the back of his jacket. His heart was pounding, he felt like he couldn't breathe. The last of the hoard disappeared around a corner and Steve slumped. 

That- that shouldn't have happened. They should have been dead, they were seconds away. 

"What the fuck?" breathed Billy. He turned, looked questioningly at Steve. If he minded the close proximity, he didn't say anything. "What the fuck?"

"El," muttered Steve. It had to be, it could only be her. "They're going to protect the Gate." He shook his head, "Let's get the fuck out of here before she closes it." 

Billy held his gaze for a moment, a considering moment, before he smirked and waved his hand, "After you, Princess," he said. Billy linked his hands together and held them out, Steve took the boost he was offering. He was too tired to argue, he just wanted to get the fuck out of those tunnels. The fresh air hit him the moment he was out, and he tore the cloth away from his face and breathed it in, greedily. Steve threw himself on the ground, stared up at the sky. Billy crawled next to him, leaning back. Without a word he pulled a cigarette from his jacket pocket and lit it up. 

"Holy shit, are you guys okay?" said Dustin, talking quickly. "I can't believe they just ran past, I thought you guys were dead for sure." 

"Dustin!" snapped Max. Billy glanced at her, amused. She hovered close enough to him that he could reach out and ruffle her hair. Max made a noise of annoyance, but Steve thought she looked more relieved then anything else.

Billy glanced down at him, handed over his cigarette in silent offering. "See, I told you it would be fun, pretty boy." 

Steve gave him the finger, even as he took a drag and handed him back the cigarette. Mike was already on the radio, listening for news but all Steve wanted to do was take a nap. It had been a long day, and it had been a weird fucking day too. Billy stretched out next to him was testament to that. On his good days he could be friendly, he would offer him a smoke, or try and make conversation with him after basketball training. But those days were few and far between and Steve had rarely had the patience to deal with the volatility of Billy Hargrove. He felt like something had changed tonight. This- this was the real Billy, the Billy that no one ever got to see because he was angry all the fucking time. This was a Billy that was relaxed and flirty, with just that hint of dangerous underneath it all. Still an asshole, but no worse then Steve had been. This Billy was someone he would have been friends with, could still be friends with, maybe already was after everything that had happened. 

Steve kind of liked this Billy. 

The Chief was pissed when he found out what they had done, what Steve had allowed them to do. They had hauled themselves back to the Byers' place when Mike got on their nerves enough to make themselves move. He wanted to be there when Eleven came back, he wanted to see her. 

Steve had to admit, they were quite sweet the pair of them. 

Billy hadn't been quite as reckless on the drive back to the relief of Dustin, though he still took the corners a little sharp. Steve was pretty certain he was doing it just to be an asshole, just to make the kids squeak and tense up in the back seat. Steve might have told him to knock it off if he could be bothered. But he was too tired for that, he opened the window and relaxed into his seat instead. He might have stayed there too, had Nancy and Jonathan not come out to investigate at the roar of the Camaro. Stupid Billy and his stupid loud car, couldn't try and blend in, could he? No, he had to have the loudest car in Hawkins. The kids spilled out of the car, immediately going to find Will. The Flayer was gone, the gate was closed, all was well again. 

Nancy had eyed Billy suspiciously, as they had trailed in too. Steve had waved her off, had all but shoved Billy inside the house. That was about as far as things got before the Chief rolled up, put Eleven to bed to rest it off and Mike had opened his big mouth about what they had done. Max punched him in the arm, but the damage had already been done. 

In their defense, the kids weren't meant to have come with them. Hell, Billy had just wanted to go it alone. The Chief hadn't been any happier with that idea either, and Billy had promptly flipped him off and stalked out. Steve could see that familiar anger flicker in his eyes when the Chief had turned on him. His intentions were good, Steve knew, but Billy didn't see that. He saw a threat, Steve was almost impressed that he had just walked out rather then anything else. 

It was only when Joyce started to fuss over them, pulling food from the fridge, that Nancy and Jonathan disappeared, did Steve drift outside. Billy hadn't gone far, sat on the steps, a cigarette in hand. Steve fell down next to him, plucking the cigarette from his fingers and taking a long drag. 

"Watch yourself, Harrington," snapped Billy, watching him out of the corner of his eye. "I'm not always so generous." 

Steve shrugged, "I'll risk it." He leaned on his side, poked Billy's shirt. He had buttoned up a little to go into the tunnels, but his chest was out for all to see once more now that they were back in the real world. His shirt was a mess though, stained with guts and dirt and whatever else. "I think we owe you a shirt-" Steve rolled his eyes, "If you can count this as a shirt."

"Don't lie, Harrington, you enjoy it." 

Steve didn't know when their relationship had turned this flirtatious, but he was never one to back down. "Never said I didn't, just saying you look like shit, Hargrove." 

"Fuck you." There was no venom to the words though, and Billy sighed, sitting up. The sky was beginning to lighten, the grass shining with morning dew. "I need to get Max home." Something dark flickered across his face, "I'm going to be in enough shit as it is." 

The door swung open, and Billy glared behind them at Hopper. The Chief stood there, looking as exhausted as Steve felt. Eleven was going to be okay, the gate had been closed, but the situation was still complicated. Eleven would always be a target, whether it was from Upside-Down monsters or real world monsters, there would always be someone that wanted her dead or wanted to use her for her abilities. Billy and Max had both been told to keep all of this quiet, and they had agreed without question. Still, whether it was the fact that he was a police office or a figure of authority or whatever, Billy had made it clear that he wanted as little to do with Hopper as possible. Hopper obviously, could not have cared less. 

"You kids need a ride home?" asked Hopper. He looked at Billy, pointedly. "I can take you and Max if you want, Hargrove, talk to your parents, give them some excuse. You were meant to bring her home, right?" 

"What the fuck would you know?" snapped Billy, every muscle in his body tense. 

Hopper's eyes flickered to Steve, for just a moment, before he shrugged, casually. "Not saying I know anything, kid. Figured your dad might not be all too happy that you two were out all night is all." Billy was on his feet in seconds, blue eyes blazing, fists clenched at his side. Hopper held his hands up, "But if you're good, I won't interfere." 

"Good, cause I don't fucking need your help." Billy turned back to the house, "Time to go Maxine! Hurry the fuck up!" Billy didn't look at Steve when he left, when he got in his car with a slam of his door. He started the engine and revved it particularly loud, Max appeared, eyes wide and frazzled. She looked at Steve, then Hopper, then at Billy. 

She cleared her throat, awkwardly. "Uh, thanks, I guess?" 

Hopper waved his hand, "Go on, before your brother gets really pissed off," he said, shaking his head. "But Max, just- if you guys need anything-" 

Max nodded, her eyes hard. She reminded Steve of Billy, she had been doing that a lot lately. "Thanks, Hopper," she said. "See you around, Steve-" Billy leaned on the horn. She glared at him, "I'm coming, asshole!" Max ran down the stairs, slipped into the passenger's seat of the Camaro and Billy drove them away. 

Steve glanced up at Hopper, "What was that about?" he asked. Because it was something, he didn't know what, but there was something else going on. 

"Just a suspicion," said Hopper, shaking his head. "What about you? You look dead on your feet, you need a lift?" 

"Nah," said Steve, "I'll be fine." 

Hopper frowned, seemed like he was going to say something and then with a sigh went back inside instead. He was dead on his feet, the Chief wasn't wrong but Steve would be okay. He was no worse then Hop, he didn't need a lift home. Sure, his house was dark and empty when he finally got back but at least the sun was coming up, it wasn't so scary in the light. He didn't even get changed, couldn't be bothered, just laid down in his bed and fell asleep dreaming of tunnels and demodogs and the stench of fear. 

Needless to say, he didn't sleep very well. 

Steve didn't see Billy until the next day, until he could finally be bothered to drive down to the store and buy food. He always left it until there was next to nothing left and his stomach was growling angrily, that was what he got for being unorganised. His mother would scold him for not looking after himself (not that she could talk, not really, her concern was all an act, something to make herself feel better for never being there). Billy was in the aisle across from him, Steve had almost fallen over at the sight of him. His face was bruised, he held himself in such a way that Steve just knew that there were more under his clothes. 

Steve was sore, a little bruised, a little cut up but nothing like that. Steve had been there, Billy hadn't been hurt that badly. He hadn't realised he had been staring until Billy turned on him, eyes all angry and swirling again. 

"Billy-" 

"What do you want, Harrington?" he said, his voice tight. Billy crowded close to him, eyes narrowed. "You got something to say?" 

He had lots of things to say, like what had happened to his face? How had he gotten hurt? Was he okay? But Steve didn't say them aloud. He had the feeling it wouldn't go over so well. 

"Nothing?" sneered Billy. "You're staring a lot Harrington, what do you want? You want me to suck you off? Is that it?" 

Steve's lip curled, his face going hard. He knew Billy was trying to get a rise out of him, the monsters were gone now, what else was he going to fight? But Steve didn't want to fight him, didn't want to give him exactly what he wanted. He didn't know why Billy was hurt, why he had gone back to being the angry guy that beat the shit out of people, but he was beginning to suspect. Hopper had his suspicions, he wasn't the chief of police for nothing. Steve might not have been that smart, but he could put two and two together and it made him feel sick. Billy had fucking volunteered himself to go on a suicide mission the other night, had fought monsters with hardly even a falter in his step, he didn't deserve this shit. 

"My parents aren't home- hardly ever are," Steve started- rambled actually. He didn't know what the plan was, didn't know if he was about to get punched in the face but he had to do something, had to try. "Wanna come over?" 

Billy's eyes flashed, and Steve wasn't surprised when his hand shot out, when it curled in his shirt and dragged him closer. "I don't fucking need you pity, Harrington." 

Steve would deny it to anyone that asked, but he kind of missed 'pretty boy' and 'princess' and all the other pet names Billy had come up with. He didn't even want to begin thinking about what that meant. "I have alcohol," said Steve, instead. 

Billy shoved him, "Fuck off." 

Steve didn't try and stop him when he walked away. It was what he expected, but that didn't mean he couldn't try. They had been through some shit together now, that had to mean something. Besides, a part of him (a big part) kind of dreaded going home when his house was so quiet, so empty. Steve tried not to think about it too much though, it wouldn't change anything. The sheer exhaustion of the last 24 hours had worn off but he was still tired. He'd had nightmares before, the demogorgon standing tall and menacing over them, the panic of the moment, not knowing what was happening and what to do. They were different now, there were demodogs and tunnels and the kids getting hurt, Billy standing in front of him, the fear, the stench. It was hard to sleep knowing exactly what it was he was going to see when he closed his eyes. Maybe if Billy had come over, if they had gotten into his dad's good alcohol it would have been okay, it would have been a distraction. 

But Billy had stayed away, Steve wished he could say he wasn't disappointed. 

He did show up the next night though. Steve recognised the engine, opened the door before Billy had even gotten out of his car. He still looked like shit, actually he might have even looked worse. The bruises had taken on a range of colours now, purple, green, yellow and Steve could have sworn there were even fresh ones. 

"You still offering up alcohol, pretty boy?" Billy asked, standing a little too close, his eyes a little too intense. 

Steve didn't back down, when did he ever? He waved the bottle of whiskey in his face, his lips twisted up into a smirk. "You came just in time, California." 

Something else shifted between them that night. 

Their relationship was going through all sorts of changes these days but Steve didn't mind, it was better then being alone. Maybe the alcohol wasn't such a good idea, but man did it make them feel better. Billy got a little less angry, a little more teasing. He sat close to Steve on the couch when they had gone through the rest of the bottle (and then some), he had an arm around his shoulders, a cigarette lit (Steve's mum would be furious, but she wasn't there, and it wasn't like Steve hadn't done the same). It was easy, it was comfortable (it was warm and safe). Steve couldn't help but melt into the touch, he couldn't help but feel relief at not being alone. 

Billy glanced at him, eyes unreadable. Steve had said that last bit out loud and he cringed. He was too drunk to take it back though, to pretend like it was a mistake. It wasn't, and Billy might have been all bruised up but Steve didn't look much better. His face was too pale, the shadows under his eyes too dark. 

"Never really slept that well after I discovered-" He waved his hand vaguely, almost hit Billy in the face. "All this, everything that happened." His eyes flickered to the pool, to the eerie blue light. He knew that didn't help either, that fucking pool. Billy followed his gaze, but didn't say anything. "We found some excuse for Barb's death and I know Nancy is relieved, but no one will ever really know the truth, that it wasn't some kind of chemical poisoning." He tipped back his beer, drank half the bottle. 

"What was it, then?" asked Billy. 

"Demogorgon," said Steve, his voice hard. "The rest of us had gone inside, she sat by the pool. It dragged her in, to the Upside Down. She died there, she was killed there." Billy didn't say anything, and Steve took a breath. "And I get to see it every day, it's fucking great, Billy. No one usually around to distract me, just me in this big house, don't know why we live in such a big fucking house when it's just me most of the time." 

"Poor little rich boy," said Billy, sarcastically. 

Steve gave him the finger, but didn't move from his comfortable spot next to him. There hadn't been any malice in it, and he knew how it sounded. It sounded fucking spoiled that he hated this house, hated all the privileges he had. 

"Where are your parents, anyway?" asked Billy. 

"Who knows, they were in New York last week," said Steve, "I think they were going on holiday to Paris straight after though." 

Billy raised an eyebrow, "Just them?" 

Steve laughed, bitterly. "Yeah, man. They don't take me with them, haven't for years." 

"Seem like assholes." 

He wasn't wrong, they were assholes. Steve figured they had only had a child because that was what was expected of them, but neither of them were cut out for parenting. They didn't care, it had been the nanny looking after him when he was younger and now he was older, it was just him. His dad would expect him to go into the family business, but how he was expected to do that when he didn't show him shit all about what he did, Steve didn't know. 

He also didn't care. 

Steve raised his beer in salute and Billy matched him, a kind of self-loathing glimmer in his eyes, "To asshole parents, huh?" said Billy. 

"To asshole parents," echoed Steve, clinking their bottles together. 

Billy leaned back, his gaze drifting up to the roof again. "My mother left us when we were younger," he said, quietly. Steve tried not to react, tried not to look at him too sharply. He didn't want to ruin this, didn't want to scare Billy away. He was a little too drunk to move that fast anyway. "Can't blame her, not for leaving my dad. He was an abusive fuck, still is, obviously." Billy laughed, coldly and Steve resisted the urge to wince. "Didn't take me with her, obviously. Haven't heard from her in years and well- dad just beats me around these days. Don't know why he thought coming to this small, hick town was a good fucking idea, people are too fucking nosy around here." Billy looked at him, pointedly and Steve didn't try and deny it. Billy's eyes softened, even as he rolled them. They were really fucking blue too, it wasn't the first time he had noticed, but he was noticing them again, couldn't help it. The arm around his shoulders tightened, became more like a headlock, at least for a moment. "But I suppose they're good at keeping their mouths shut too." 

"Do you want me to sign some paperwork for you as well?" quipped Steve. 

Billy laughed, and his hold relaxed. Steve could have moved, could have put some space between them but he didn't though. He didn't want too, he was too comfortable. "Fuck off, Princess." 

"Nah," said Steve, lightly. He let the moment wash over them, let it be comfortable, and then- "Max knows, I suppose?" 

Billy didn't tense this time, had maybe seen it coming. As if Steve wouldn't have questions, as if he would just leave it as it is. "Yeah," he said. "Never seen anything, Neil tries to keep it real quiet but she's a smart kid. I think she's only just started putting together that I'm the one that gets the shit beaten out of me when she does a runner, cause it's my fault, obviously." 

Steve felt a rush of anger burn through his veins, and he had the urge to hit something, to yell and scream about how fucking shit it all was. Billy eyed him with amusement, ruffled his hair. Steve glared at him (because that hair took fucking work), and he laughed. "Don't look so outraged, Bambi. God look at you, you're like a fucking deer in headlights with those eyes of yours." Steve would have been offended, if Billy had given him the time. "Nah man, I've been pretty shit to her. Taking my anger out on her because Neil won't lay a finger on her- not that I fucking want him too, that would be worse- but I've still been shit."

"Doesn't make it better," murmured Steve. 

"No, it's fucking bullshit but I shouldn't have taken it out on Max. She came into my room yesterday after the old man left crying, cause it was her fault she said. Told her to fuck off but she threatened me with your bat if I didn't let her help patch me up." He didn't sound angry, Steve thought he sounded almost proud. 

"You're her brother, course she would want to help," said Steve. 

"Not her brother," said Billy, automatically. Steve turned his head to look at him, incredulously. "And it's not her problem, if she starts getting involved he'll turn on her too." 

"That why you wanted her to stay away from Lucas, cause you thought your Dad wouldn't like it?"

"Well, that and the first time I saw the kid Max was yelling at him." 

"You didn't like that, cause she's your little sister," said Steve, smartly. 

"Shut up, Harrington," said Billy. "That pretty mouth will get you in trouble one day." 

Steve nodded, "It usually does." 

He didn't really remember much of the rest of the night, it was a blur of alcohol and weed (and Billy maybe pulling Steve in for a bruising kiss, and maybe Steve sliding into his lap). They didn't talk about it though, didn't even mention it. It wasn't that he was ashamed, sure that kind of thing wasn't exactly accepted in Hawkins. It was a small, conservative town of course it wasn't. But Billy wouldn't have been the first guy that Steve had made out with, he didn't much care. But again, they didn't talk about it and whether it happened or not was up for debate. Who knows? Maybe Steve had just dreamed about it. Which honestly, probably wasn't that much better. 

Even when Billy showed up the next night, they didn't talk about it. Of course, Steve remembered without a shadow of a doubt, making out that time though. He hadn't been that drunk, neither of them had. Billy had pushed him against the wall, and Steve had clung to him like his life had depended on it. 

It became a routine all too quickly, one that Steve got a little too used to when Billy stopped turning up. They still hadn't talked about it, about whatever it was they were doing. Steve wasn't sure if it was just a method of release for them, a distraction, or something else. Not so long ago they hadn't even been friends and now they were that (with benefits). It was fucking confusing and if Steve thought about it for too long he got a headache. He couldn't blame Billy for breaking the cycle, for staying away. He didn't come over every day, but it was enough for Steve to notice the difference.

He missed him too.

He hated to admit it, but he did. 

He knew his house felt like a gaping black hole, with monsters hiding in the shadows when Billy- bright, loud, terrifying- Billy wasn't around to hide him from all that shit. He avoided him for two weeks, without a word, without so much as a glance, when he showed up at his front door in the middle of the night (Steve had jumped out of his skin when he had been woken from his not-so-restful sleep by the sound of Camaro). He looked like shit, a particularly ugly bruise around his neck. Steve had shuddered at the sight of it, hated to think what had been done to cause it. He wasn't mad at Billy for staying away, he had no obligations to Steve. Fuck, he had provided more then enough of a distraction for him since the tunnels. He had almost expected things to go back to how they used to be, Steve and Billy being on opposite ends of the coin. Yet Billy stood there, at his front door, in the middle of the night, his shirt too far open for the weather. 

Billy glanced up at the house, and then at Steve, a frown tugging at his lips. "Why are all the lights on?" he asked. 

"Why are you here?" countered Steve. It wasn't something he would have noticed before, the both of them too drunk or too stoned or too engrossed in each other. Steve hardly ever turned the lights off anymore though, even before the tunnels. It wasn't any safer with the lights on he knew, but it made him feel like it was. 

Billy shrugged, and Steve just stood there, stared at him. He had never seen Billy this awkward before, his hands in the pockets of his jacket, his eyes barely able to look at Steve. Jesus, did he feel guilty or some shit? He saw the change in his demeanor when they stood there for too long, saw his eyes turn hard, his lip curl. "Whatever," he snapped out. "Whatever, I don't fucking know." He turned on his heel, went to stomp down Steve's front stairs. 

Steve rolled his eyes, caught his wrist in his hand before he could get too far. "Hey," he said, his voice soft. "I did tell you my door was always open if you needed it." 

He had said that, and he had meant it too. 

Steve tugged at his arm, pulled him through the doorway (Billy didn't fight him, went all too easily). "You need me to patch you up, California?" 

"Are you trying to Mother Hen me too?" said Billy. Steve gave him a long look and Billy was the one to break first, sighing. "I'm fine, it's not so bad," he said. Blue eyes found his, studying him. Steve felt like Billy was seeing through him completely, and it left him feeling exposed. He let go of his wrist, only for Billy to reverse roles, to take a hold of his before he could take a step back. "You good, pretty boy? You look tired."

"I'm always tired," said Steve, probably a little too honestly. 

Billy didn't react, just glanced around again. "Real bright in here," he said. "What time is it?" 

"I don't know, 1:30am, I think? Maybe?" The nights always dragged long for him, he hardly ever knew what time it was. Steve tried not to look at the clock too often, it didn't help. 

"Let's get you to bed, then, Princess," said Billy, a smirk twitching at his lips. Steve wished his stomach didn't do a little flip at the sight of it, at the way Billy dragged him up the stairs to his room, backed him up so that he fell in the bed. He turned lights off along the way, and Steve tried not to react at each switch he flipped (Billy didn't say anything, just held his wrist that little bit tighter). 

Billy crawled over him, wrapped him in warmth and tanned, golden skin. His lips pressed against his, hard and wanting. Steve let himself lose himself in them. Billy slipped his tongue into his mouth, exploring every inch, and Steve moaned when he moved his attention to his jaw, to his neck. Billy chuckled, and inched back up to kiss him chastely on the lips, once more. Steve blinked, stared at him through his lustful haze. Billy kissed him again, couldn't seem to help himself, but again it was light and gentle. 

"Billy-" 

"You look exhausted, sweetheart, go to sleep, okay?" said Billy, softly. He shifted, pulling Steve with him. Billy laid on his back, had Steve nestled under his arm, his head resting on his chest. Steve felt like he should have said something, talk about what they never talked about because this- this wasn't fucking casual. And if it was- well, Steve was screwed. 

"I- Billy-" 

"Shhh," said Billy, his hand running through Steve's hair. Steve could feel his eyes fighting to stay open, the warmth and comfort and protection wearing away at him. He didn't want to sleep though, he wanted to talk, they had to talk, they couldn't keep- "You really do look after your hair, don't you Princess?" 

"Shut up," Steve mumbled.

Billy chuckled, Steve could feel it. He tried to fight the pull of sleep, but God he was tired. He was so tired and he was so comfortable, he just- he couldn't. Maybe this wouldn't happen again, maybe this was the last he would see of soft, gentle, caring Billy (he hoped not) but if it was, he might as well have made the most of it. 

Billy was gone in the morning. 

Steve wasn't surprised. 

It wasn't that Billy avoided him, it was just he tried not to come over too often. Sometimes he would come over angry, but he tried not to take out on Steve. Note the word, tried. It didn't always work, and Steve didn't always try and hold back. Billy wasn't the only one that could get angry and Steve wasn't the most patient man, especially when he was running on very little sleep. He tried not to take it on Billy, but again, it didn't always work. 

But then there were the good days, the ones where Billy would let Steve look after him, would let him be gentle and tell him how fucking good he was, where Steve would wake up after a nightmare in Billy's arms and it finally felt like he could breathe again. 

Hawkins had seen the change between them, it was hard not too. Nancy kept sending him looks of concern (not that she had any right to be worried about his well being), but things between her, Steve and Jonathan were better now. Awkward, but better. She just didn't want him to get hurt, she had said. She must have known what it had sounded like coming from her of all people because she didn't mention it again. Dustin questioned why he kept hanging out with "that asshole", even if he didn't say it with as much hate as he used too. And no one at school said shit to Steve now after the one time Tommy had tried and Billy had punched him in the face (with a little too much glee). He had turned up to Steve's later that night all bruised and beaten, but it was the one time he hadn't seemed to mind. It was worth it, he had said. He had wanted to punch Tommy in the face since he had first gotten to Hawkins. 

Steve couldn't blame him for that, most did. 

He didn't know what they were, but Steve was beginning to think it didn't matter. It helped, whatever it was. Not just him, but Billy too. He and Max had been getting closer, he wasn't always angry, like he used to be. It was good, they were good (you know, most of the time). 

He heard the Camaro pull up next to his BMW, he saw Billy glance into the car. It had been a few days since he had last seen him, it was Billy's fault this time. He had been particularly mean, his words cutting. Steve couldn't remember what had started it, which meant it was probably him running on too little sleep and being an asshole. Billy obviously hadn't had the patience for it and they had been in a silent stand off ever since. Not that it should have mattered, because it wasn't like there was anything for either of them to lose. Still, Steve's stupid heart betrayed him, skipped a beat when their eyes met. 

Dustin had already gone inside, looking all handsome. Steve had really felt like a Mother Hen then, letting the kid fly the coop. It was the Snow Ball, a particularly special day on the pre-teen social calendar. The kids had been talking about it for weeks, all excited and nervous. They were so cute. He wondered if El would get to go, Mike had invited her. He hoped so, she deserved this, deserved to be normal for once. 

He heard Max get out of the Camaro, her smile bright, a light blush on her cheeks. He wondered if Billy had said something, he probably had given the look on her face. Steve wasn't sure he had ever seen her look like that before, happy and embarrassed and nervous. She waved at Steve, and he waved back, watching her shuffle inside. 

Billy met his gaze again, nodding his head to the side and Steve rolled his eyes. Billy took that as answer enough, getting out of his car, his hands in his pockets. Most of the parents were just dropping their kids and leaving but it was the school, there was heaps of parking if they wanted to stay and really, what was the point of leaving? They would just have to come back. Billy wandered down the side of the school hall, disappearing somewhere behind it. Steve supposed he was meant to follow, but it had been a few days and he hated making it easy. 

Steve stepped out of the car, let the cool, night breeze hit him. It was freezing, it would have been easier to just get back in the car, light up a cigarette, enjoy the peace and quiet- it was probably what he should have done. Even as he thought about it, his feet were moving. He moved quickly through the dark, found Billy hovering in a small light patch behind the building. His stomach did a little flip that Steve adamantly ignored. Billy always looked handsome, Steve should have been used to it by now (but there was something about being out in the moonlight, the music filtering out from the hall, Billy's blonde curls framing him like a halo and those jeans- always with the too tight jeans). Steve shook his head, leaned on the wall next to him and held his hand out expectantly. 

Billy's lips twitched up into a smirk as he took one last drag and then handed the cigarette over to Steve. 

It was peaceful, just the two of them hiding out behind the school. They didn't talk, they didn't need too. Steve could feel his muscles relax, could feel the easy way his body responded to having Billy nearby. He could hardly even remember what Billy had said this time to piss him off, all he could remember was a door slamming, was nights of tossing and turning. He could feel Billy's eyes on him, but he refused to look. Steve was there, wasn't he? That was something. He just wanted to enjoy the moment, to let the sense of calm wash over him at least for a little while. 

Billy pushed himself off the wall, and Steve did look at him then. His eyes were bright as he held a hand out, the smirk still on his face. "Wanna dance, pretty boy?" 

Steve raised an eyebrow, even as he stubbed the cigarette out against the wall. "What? Never been to the Snow Ball before, Hargrove?" He shook his head. "You missed out, it was a riot." 

"I can tell," he said, sarcastically. There was a particularly loud bout of laughter from the kids inside, but Billy still held his out. Steve ran his eyes over him, he had only buttoned one button on his shirt this time. Billy stepped closer, his smirk melting into something else, his eyes darkening with temptation and promise. Steve swallowed, let him take his hand and pull him off the wall. "Come on Princess, play with me," whispered Billy, his voice low. His hands moved to his waist, heavy and warm even through his jacket, swaying them gently to whatever music was being played in the background. Steve honestly couldn't tell, it was all white noise. All he could see was Billy, all he could feel was Billy, all he could hear and smell, was Billy Hargrove. 

"You're still an asshole," said Steve, quietly. 

Billy chuckled, "I know." He pressed his face to Steve's neck, nuzzled his nose against his skin. "I'm sorry." 

Steve rolled his eyes, "I know." He felt Billy press a kiss to the line of his jaw and tugged at his hair, sharply. "Stop it, not out here, jesus christ." 

"Like us dancing is any fucking better," said Billy. He pulled back, rested his forehead against Steve's. Steve let out a breath, closed his eyes for a moment. It was surreal, if he thought about it for too long. This- whatever he and Billy were doing- made no sense. It shouldn't have even happened and yet now they stood behind the school hall, wrapped in each other's arms, swaying to the music. Everything had changed so fast. But it felt right, it felt perfect. He didn't know how to say it without ruining everything, without complicating it all. Maybe it was perfect because they didn't talk about it. 

Steve had no idea. 

He knew it wasn't about to get any easier. Billy had gotten a job at the local pool for the summer, what the hell was Steve meant to do with all that muscled, golden skin staring at him right in the face? He didn't think he would be the only one drooling. Just the thought of it annoyed him. 

What the fuck was Steve going to do? 

He needed Billy, that much was obvious. Steve sighed, and he felt Billy tighten his grip. 

"What are you thinking about?" asked Billy, his voice soft. He didn't want to lose that, not now. He'd gotten too used to it, he didn't want to have to go back to the angry, distant Billy that only looked at Steve for a fight. He couldn't, that would just fuck him up so much more. He'd gotten used to Billy filling up his cold, empty home, to sharing his bed with him. 

Steve shook his head, tried to will the tightness in his throat away. He was just tired, that was why he was like this, why he was getting lost in his head. That was all, he just needed to get some sleep. "Nothing," said Steve, "It doesn't matter." 

Billy stared at him for a long moment. Steve felt like he was seeing through him completely, but then he shrugged and turned away. Steve let out a breath. "What are you doing later?" asked Billy, instead. 

"I don't know, but I think you're about to tell me," said Steve, smirking. 

Billy grinned, "I'll come over after I drop Max home?" 

"I'll leave the door unlocked." 

They would have to talk about it eventually, Steve knew that. 

But not yet. 

Billy stepped back, gripped his hand tightly as he spun him around. Steve rolled his eyes, even if he couldn't hold back the grin that had spread across his lips. 

This would do for now.