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Why was this happening to him? He was in a perfectly happy relationship, or at least that’s what he thought. His boyfriend loved him, right? . . . Well, if he did, Ranpo wouldn’t be coughing up a variety of flowers most of which he didn’t recognize, let alone know the meaning of.
Ranpo didn’t know what to do, so he just laid in bed, crying, because, really, what else was there to do in his predicament? His throat was to soar to enjoy sweets of any kind and he couldn’t go to work and solve a case, because then his co-workers would find out about his disease, which was not really something he wanted. Of course, usually, when he was sad or bored, he’d just go bother his boyfriend until he either helped him directly, or until he no longer remember what made him feel that way in the first place. Unfortunately, now, this wasn’t an option, as said boyfriend was currently the cause of Ranpo’s misery.
The short detective chuckled sadly. How could he be so stupid. How could he not notice that Poe was getting distant, that he would work more and more, locking himself in his office and barely paying attention to Ranpo anymore.
All of this thinking about his disastrous love life made Ranpo cough up even more flowers, he honestly didn’t even bother dragging himself to the bathroom to cough them up, but instead just kept laying on his back, occasionally sitting up ever so slightly to knock the flowers off of his face. The scene he formed by not washing the blood of his face and not throwing the flowers away was beautify grotesque, a terrible tragedy, but not one without its own charm.
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It wasn’t true, that Poe didn’t love Ranpo. He loved him.
Some time ago, he did.
Not anymore.
Actually, Poe never expected to be hiding in his office, just to avoid his boyfriend. He never expected to lose his feelings for Ranpo, he actually expected the opposite – that Ranpo would get bored with him and leave him, but something else entirely ended up happening.
When they started dating, Poe wasn’t ecstatic, like he thought he’d be after his feelings were returned. It was strange, but every time they would go on a date or even just meet up Poe would be very excited before, but during and after it he’d be distant, he’d feel pressure to show his love more and honestly, he felt like the relationship was slowly ruining him. He also felt stuck. Like he wasn't allowed leave. He wanted to go back to being friends, hell, even being enemies like before, would be better than this wreck.
He chuckled at the irony of their situation.
He had to admit that it was funny, how he idolized Ranpo ever since they first met, that all he wanted was for the other to notice him. Nothing more then to be close to him. Even if he tried to put on a façade, even if he tired to make himself seem like he hated the rival detective, he really just admired him and wanted to get to know him, get to associate with him. Now, however, he was leading the other on, making him think he loved him, when in reality . . .
Poe decided to finally do something, so he got out of his apartment and sent a quick text to Ranpo that he was coming over and that they needed to talk.
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As soon as he saw the text, Ranpo decided to make himself look presentable. He threw away the blood-stained flowers, washed the blood off his face and changed into a clean shirt. Even with all of that he still looked like death, which was appropriate for someone who was on the brink of it. He spent the rest of the time waiting for Poe in front of the mirror, just staring at his reflexion and, occasionally, coughing up a petal into the sink. The detective would watch the flowers sadly fall onto the porcelain, staining it’s perfect white with the crimson of blood. His head was empty, as he didn’t want to trouble himself thinking about Poe, but he didn’t know what else to think about. This mindless staring was interrupted by the door unlocking. He glanced at himself one last time, to make sure that there was no blood on his face and came out of the bathroom to meet his boyfriend.
“Why don’t You love me, Edgar?” – Ranpo said immediately after seeing the man, his voice cracking and barely above a whisper, tears threatening to spill form his eyes.
Poe was, of course, taken aback by this, not, because he was surprised that his boyfriend figured it out, but by how torn he seemed by this discovery.
“I – “ – Ranpo sniffled. – “I thought I meant something to You. I, I thought You loved me! How could I have been so stupid, to let myself be lead on by You?! I, the genius detective, couldn't figure out something so banal sooner!” – His knees buckled under him and he was now on the floor, shaking and crying.
Poe slid onto the floor, wanting to comfort the detective, but not knowing how to do so, knowing that he was the cause of the other’s pain. For a moment the two men just sat there, one crying and the other sitting there, helplessly, until Ranpo started coughing again. Several flowers made their way out of the black haired mans mouth and ungracefully fell onto the floor making wet plopping sounds as soon as they hit the floorboards. This made Poe gasp and step back, just a bit, but he soon regained his composure. Poe grabbed his boyfriend's face, bringing it up so that their eyes could meet for a moment, before looking down himself.
“I’m sorry.” – Poe said. – “I’m sorry for leading You on, I’m sorry for not breaking up with You after I realized I no longer had feelings for You, I’m so, so sorry. I’m sorry for depending on You in hard times, for begging for Your love, even though I didn’t love You back. Maybe, if I broke it off sooner, if I’d have done it quickly I wouldn’t have caused You so much pain . . .” – He was starting to cry now too, just from the guilt he felt from putting the other through such agony. Even if he didn’t love the him in a romantic way, he still cared for him.
So, for a minute, the two just sat there, crying. Together, but alone, both wanting to go to the other for comfort, but both unable to do so, as they knew that it would do more harm then good. Soon the crying did down just to sniffles and the occasional cough from Ranpo.
“You should get the surgery.” – Poe said, quietly, softly, delicately trying to deal with harsh reality.
He was only met with sniffling and a bit of sad chuckling from Ranpo.
“So, You’ve given up on me . . .” – Ranpo said, hoping, wishing, praying that his theory wasn't true.
Instead of getting met with a rebuttal, he was just met with uncomfortable silence, that confirmed his worries.
Heh.
How unfortunate.
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Weeks have passed after the breakup. Ranpo did end up getting the surgery and losing his feelings for Poe. They were not as close as before the incident, but they were still semi-close with each other, some could even call them friends. There was, however, always a certain awkwardness between them. They would think about what their lives would have been like if they never got into the relationship in the first place. Would they have been happier? Would they still be close friends? Would Poe still come and visit Ranpo at the ADA and would Ranpo still be solving the mysteries in Poe’s novels with such eagerness?
Or would one still fall for the other? Would one of them still have been put into a helpless position that would sour things between him and the other? Was falling victim to love inevitable in their case?
They’d never know.