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For something that Wynonna had seen coming a mile away, finally closing the curtain on her and Doc’s relationship hurt more than she expected. They were on the road for a month. They went sightseeing, tried new foods, and introduced Doc to so many things the new world had to offer. They went to an arcade where she introduced him to video games. Watching Doc grumble red-faced as he hung the toy gun up after losing a hunting game had her laughing for the rest of that day. She enjoys her time with him, she really does. They had many conversations and laughs but nothing seemed to fill the overwhelming emptiness she felt inside. The feeling builds and builds until finally it becomes the elephant in the room they can’t ignore anymore.
“I’m sorry.” Wynonna cries into Doc’s chest as he strokes through her hair. “I do love you.” She sputters out desperately. She does love him. She has for a long time; she just happens to love more than just him.
“I know that darlin’.” Doc tries to soothe her. “I will always love you too, just like I love your great-great-grandfather, but we both know that sometimes love ain’t enough.” A hand underneath her chin tilts her red eyed gaze to meet his. “Especially when there are others you love more.” The understanding and love he gives her sends another sob through her.
“What if they don’t want me?” Wynonna whispers out her greatest fear.
You see, Wynonna has loved her baby sister for a long time. The day her mama brought home a tiny screaming Waverly; Wynonna knew she would always be the most important person to her. She knew she had to protect Waverly, like she craved for someone to protect her. Wynonna found herself thrusted into the reality of that duty the first time Ward came towards a tiny crying Waverly with swinging fists. She started hiding Waverly when daddy was drinking, instructing the little one to sing a song to herself so she didn’t hear her older sister’s cries. It worked. She could ignore the bruises and blood as long as Waverly was untouched.
Wynonna has always loved her sister, but at some point, the type of love had changed without her permission. She was filled with thoughts of her little sister’s lips and eyes and newfound curves. She hated herself for this attraction that she couldn’t shake. Eventually she left just to take the temptation away.
When she came back the curse and later demons took most of her attention. Then Haught entered the picture and Wynonna was hurt and glad and jealous. Having Nicole there meant another barrier between Wynonna and her inappropriate feelings. Nicole treated Waverly better than Wynonna could ever imagine herself capable of, and her baby sister was so happy. Wynonna decided to distract herself with Doc (and a little bit Dolls) and lock her feelings away.
She didn’t plan on developing feelings towards Nicole. They crept up on her so slowly that she didn’t realize what happened until they were drunkenly stumbling through the woods, bickering the whole way. Then Wynonna had a glimpse of hope when Nicole turned “Daddy” on her before she entered the garden. When she brought Waverly and Doc home, they arrived to find eighteen months gone and a haunted Nicole. Neither Wynonna or Nicole brought up what happened between them, Nicole and Waverly got married, and Wynonna left.
“Nonsense, Wynonna. They will love you just as they always have.” Doc pulls her from his chest and helps her lay back on the bed of the motel they found themselves in. Wynonna curls into him and sniffles as she manages to calm her tears.
“Ugh, I hate crying.” She complains swiping roughly at her eyes and smiles at the chuckle that rumbles through Doc. “Why aren’t you grossed out?” She inquires curiously. “I just told you I have honky-tonk feelings for my sister.” She feels his hand below her chin, tilting her head up towards him as he laughs at her wording. He looks at her with a look of understanding on his face.
“You’re in love, Wynonna. We don’t get to choose who that love goes to, unfortunately.” Doc lands a kiss on her forehead. “Besides, such a thing was not unheard of in my day.” He shrugs.
“What do we do now?” She asks after a few moments of silence.
“Now we go to Montana.”
It’s a week later when Wynonna and Doc pull up in front of a small country house in Montana. Wynonna’s breath comes out in harsh pants as her nerves get the best of her. Inside that house is her little girl, her precious baby that she had to send away to keep safe.
“I think I may hurl. Or cry. Or both.” Wynonna steps off the motorcycle with shaky legs.
“I feel much the same.” Doc admits as he follows her off the bike. He grabs her hand in his and gives it a reassuring squeeze. “Shall we?”
“We shall.” Wynonna nods in confirmation. They don’t make it up on the porch before the door opens and they see the smiling face of Gus.
“Come here, Wynonna.” Her Aunt Gus wraps her in a tight hug. “I’m so proud of you.” Gus cups Wynonna’s face in her hands as she pulls back from the hug before turning to Doc. “Bring it in, cowboy.” The older woman grins as pulls Doc into a quick hug, giving him a pat on the back. “I’m about to get Alice up from her nap.” Gus grins. “Come sit on the couch.” She ushers them inside.
Wynonna looks around the small living room with a smile. All over the walls there are pictures of Wynonna, Waverly, Doc, and Nicole. She also notices pictures of her daughter in all different types of milestones. It hurts her heart to think of all they missed. She turns to see Doc looking around with just as much fascination as her. There are toys, coloring books, and sippy cups all around, so much evidence of her daughter’s life here.
“You’ve got a surprise waiting for you, Alice.” Gus’s voice is the only warning she gets before Gus comes around the corner, holding the hand of a toddler.
It feels like all the breath has left Wynonna’s lungs when she looks at her daughter for the first time since she was born. Alice is beautiful. She has her father’s eyes and her mother’s hair. Wynonna stands from the couch and takes a step toward her. Alice smiles as soon as Wynonna makes eye contact with the small girl, and she notices the little dimples and smile lines that remind her of Waverly.
“Mama!” The little girl squeals excitedly before crashing into Wynonna’s arms. She holds her daughter tightly as tears fall unhindered down her face.
“Hi, baby girl.” Wynonna chokes out through her tears. She lifts the small girl into her arms and places kisses all over her face. “I’ve missed you every day. I’m sorry I wasn’t here.” Alice places her tiny hands on her mother’s cheeks and wipes at the wetness flowing there.
“Aunt Gus says that you’re a superhero! You had to save everyone.” Alice places a sloppy kiss on Wynonna’s cheek.
“That’s right, darlin. Your mom is a superhero. The best one I’ve ever seen.” Doc comments as he walks up to the pair. Alice holds her arms out to be passed into her father’s arms.
“You’re a superhero too.” Alice assures him as she leans her head down on his chest.
“That he is, baby girl.” Wynonna smiles.
For two months they’ve been staying at Gus’s, building a relationship with their daughter. Alice is more than they ever could have imagined. She is whip smart, way smarter than Wynonna at that age anyway. Wynonna tells her she got her smarts from her Aunt Waverly. She’s funny too. Wynonna would like to think that part came from her, but she does recognize a hint of Gus’s sarcasm in the girl. She likes to put on shows for her parents. She’ll sing and dance and pout until Wynonna joins her. Wynonna never imagined bouncing a toddler around while singing Disney songs with her but doing it now with her daughter in her arms feels right. She won’t ever trade it.
Doc took to the father role easily. They played games together and he took her for walks and told her all kinds of stories from the old days. Alice always listens intently as she snuggles on his chest. Wynonna and Doc spend all their time bonding with the girl, bathing her, tucking her in at night, and reading her a story. Sometimes Alice will tell them all about what Gus taught her about her family. She tells Wynonna one night that she is most excited to meet Waverly now.
Wynonna remembers giving birth to Alice about a year and half ago. It’s mind boggling to see that her little girl is three years old now. Wynonna still hasn’t been able to wrap her head around their eighteen-month disappearance in the garden. Thinking about all the time that was stolen from her just makes her angry, so she focuses on doing what she can now.
“Are you sure we got everything she needs packed?” Wynonna runs her hand through her hair as she glances around the room, searching for anything left behind.
“It’s all in the car.” Gus assures her while bouncing the three-year-old on her hip. “We better get going if you are going to catch your plane, John Henry!” She calls out.
“We’ll be right there.” Wynonna promises as Gus leaves to buckle the girl in her car seat. The heir sighs and meets Doc in the living room. “You better swear to me that you’ll both come home, safe and sound.” She points a warning finger in his face.
“I do so solemnly swear.” He smirks while pulling her in for a hug. “I’ll take care of our girl, Wynonna. We both know you have some matters to take care of before bringing Alice home.” He winks, chuckling at her blush. “We will see you in three months.”
They talked it out and it took a lot of convincing on Doc’s part, but he finally won her over on a father-daughter trip. Doc loves exploring with his daughter and after multiple successful day trips in the past couple months, he thinks he can handle a road trip. Another bonus was it gave Wynonna time to go home to talk to Waverly and Nicole and set up a room for her little girl.
“I’ll have the barn renovated for you by then. The homestead will always be your home too. Alice will have a room in the barn as well, so she can choose where she wants to sleep.” Wynonna promises. “Yay for co-parenting.” She laughs with teary eyes as he pulls her in for a hug.
“Go get your women, Wynonna.” He places a kiss on her forehead. “Your true loves are waiting for you.” He grabs his bag and heads to the car Gus had surprised them with a few days ago. Her reasoning being you can’t put a three year old on a motorcycle, Wynonna.
Wynonna waves to her little girl as Doc starts the car and pulls out of the driveway, sending her a smile before he goes. Wynonna sighs and walk towards her motorcycle, ready for a long ride back.
Nicole is woken up early on a Sunday morning to the sound of a squeal coming from her wife downstairs. The red head pulls herself into a sitting position, stretching her muscles before reaching for the shirt that ended up hanging off the bedside lamp last night. She has just enough time to pull the shirt over her head before quick footsteps warn her of her wife’s entrance.
“Good morning!” Waverly cheers cutely as she jumps up on the bed next to Nicole. She leans in and they share a sweet kiss, making Nicole hum.
“Good morning, baby.” Nicole pulls her angel into her lap. “What has you so excited this morning?” She questions as she places some kisses on Waverly’s neck.
“I got a text from Wynonna.” Waverly gasp out as Nicole hits a sensitive spot by her pulse point.
“Oh yeah?” Nicole laughs as Waverly pushes her head away from her.
“You’re distracting me.” Waverly pouts adorably down at the redhead.
“Sorry.” Nicole smile says that she isn’t, though. “How’s Wynonna?”
“She’s coming home!”