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Guilty Until Proven Innocent
The noise of the covers sliding onto the floor was what woke Loki, but he feigned sleep as he felt them being draped back over his torso. A familiar trembling hand stroked over his hair, fingers weaving into it gently before Loki felt the mattress dip. Even while pretending to slumber, he couldn’t help his smile, knowing his lover was bestowing the same tender touch to the man still sleeping beside him.
Opening his eyes, he saw Stephen sitting up in bed, the muscles in his back flexing as he stretched his hands over his head, leaning from side to side. He flinched at Loki’s soft touch to his lower back, his fingertips brushing over one of the passionate bruises Stephen had been bestowed last night.
‘Hey, go back to sleep,’ Stephen whispered, turning from his hips to pick up his hand. He kissed Loki across the knuckles, partly in a mockery for his royal heritage, and partly because it had now developed as a feeling of affection between them.
‘Where are you going?’ Loki asked, his voice still slurred with sleep. This was unusual, often when he woke up it was with a battle readiness honed from years of training. Sleep did not come easy to him, yet when he was with these two, he found rest in a way his weary soul had craved.
Trust. So hard to earn and so easily shattered, but when he was with Stephen or Anthony, he finally understood what it felt like to trust another. He knew that in battle they would guard his back, that they would defend his honor. Neither of them sought anything more from him than his company. There were no diplomatic treaties to be gained from sleeping in his bed, no trinkets, or sense of achievement because he was a Prince of Asgard.
They weren’t in a committed relationship, not yet, but as Loki watched Stephen dress in his robes for the day, felt Anthony’s hand grip his forearm in his sleep, Loki knew it was time to broach the subject.
All three of them had been beholden in the clutch of fear for far too long. Commitments to Midgard, to Asgard, the interdimensional realm, all were reasons for none of them to speak about their feelings. Loki knew that Anthony had been betrayed by those he loved, he and Stephen had spoken about it late at night over a glass of wine, and in turn, he knew Stephen and Anthony were being cautious with him because of his own emotional scars.
‘I’ve got morning training with the apprentices,’ Stephen answered his question from a few moments ago. ‘I wish I didn’t, but I promised Wong.’
‘It’s fine. I’ll have my way with Anthony while you are busy tending to your students,’ Loki said with a wide yawn, his jaw aching from the force of it.
‘Uh-huh. You’ll be back asleep in minutes, you’re hardly awake now,’ Stephen teased, resting a knee on the bed and leaning over him. ‘Besides, I think we both thoroughly wore you out last night,’ Stephen told him with a smirk, bending down for a chaste kiss. ‘I’ll send you some coffee and tea up later, but go back to sleep,’ he murmured, cradling his face with one shaking hand and bestowing a kiss to Loki’s forehead.
‘Stephen?’ Loki said as he reached the door, his words wedging in his throat painfully as Stephen caught hold of the doorframe, concern on his face as he looked across the room at him. ‘Are you free tonight? There is something I wish to discuss with you and Anthony.’
‘Is everything-’
‘It’s nothing that won’t hold,’ Loki reassured, hearing the note of panic in Stephen’s voice. As much as he tried to conceal it, Stephen was just as insecure as they were. That initial fear in his voice, the way he was now struggling between his obligations to his students and his desire to stay and listen to him, reassured him that any discussion about creating a committed relationship wouldn’t be met with a negative response.
‘Alright, I’ll meet up with you later.’ Stephen nodded to himself, shutting the door quietly behind him. Loki felt the ward of magic he placed upon the door, a mark of protection Stephen hadn’t realized Loki could sense. It warmed the cockles of his withered black heart that another being would go to such lengths to protect him.
He rolled over in the bed, snagging Anthony around the waist with his arm and slotting his legs behind the bend of the small mortal’s, stretching his neck out so he could rest his chin on the top of his head.
‘Lokes?’ A sleepy rumble escaped Anthony’s chest.
‘Go back to sleep, darling,’ Loki whispered, tightening his arm as he heard Anthony begin to snore a few moments later.
***
‘Loki, why are you hiding here?’
Loki didn’t answer, drawing his knees closer to his chest and burrowing his face in further, grinding his forehead against the bone. He glanced up when his mother drew up her beautiful silken skirts, sitting on the dirty floor beside him. Neither of them spoke for a while, listening to the sounds of the castle life around them, the calls of the birds outside the window.
He leant closer to his mother’s warmth, wishing he could fall asleep there, knowing all his pain would abate if she remained near.
‘You shine bright through your own merits, Loki. You do not need to resort to trickery and lies to make others notice you,’ she told him, encouraging him closer still as he climbed into her lap.
‘They cannot see me beyond Thor’s radiance.’ Even forming the words was excruciating, the mocking laughter of the other children still had its claws sunk into his skin.
‘Lying to people is not the way to gain their trust. Turning them into fools has lasting repercussions,’ Frigga whispered to him, her touch on her arm lessening the sting somewhat, but it was the screams of horror and outrage which served as a balm upon his soul.
If they didn’t want to accept him then fine. They would suffer the repercussions.
The memory was so vivid that Loki had difficulty telling which was real. Was he still back home as a child on his mother’s lap? Or was it now, with a roomful of murderous gazes all directed at him?
‘This is not Loki’s doing,’ Thor spoke first, breaking the stalemate as he took a few steps forward, standing between him and those who would harm him. Despite the situation, Loki felt equal parts annoyance at Thor for thinking he needed any protection, and affection that his brother did indeed still care for him.
He didn’t look at the Avengers in the SHIELD meeting room, their regard of him was of no consequence. The only reason he’d remained on Midgard was because of the two he held dear, the two that were looking up at the footage SHIELD was showing them all. Neither Anthony nor Stephen were reacting to the proof that Midgardians were being granted special powers, strength beyond what they were capable of, strength they were using to wreak havoc on those around them.
‘Once again Stark’s judgement puts the world at risk,’ the archer, Clint, sneered, standing his ground when Loki took a menacing step towards him for daring to slight his lover.
‘Clint,’ the female Avenger spoke, Romanoff he believed her name was. She was the only one he begrudgingly respected, recognizing how she bore the same scars of past regret. ‘We don’t know enough about what’s happening. We can’t just pin it all on-’
‘That’s Loki’s magic,’ Stephen interrupted her, his lips pressing in a thin line as he crossed his arms over his chest, the reflections of the images he was watching dancing across his eyes.
Courtship was an intricate dance, an ebb and flow of emotions, of vulnerability and guarding your heart against rejection. Missteps were frequent, and while he himself had never partaken in it, preferring his romantic endeavors to be for one night only, he had allowed himself to hope.
Barbed agony coiled around his heart at Stephen’s words, the way his lover was withdrawing from them both, the disbelief in his features. In turn, Anthony’s eyes went wide as he looked up at Stephen, a hint of vulnerability in his gaze before he quenched it, anger taking its place.
This was his worst fear. His and Anthony’s.
‘This is not Loki’s doing,’ Thor repeated, unwavering in his defense, even when the mood soured against him too.
‘Thor…we can’t trust him. I told you this, you, and Tony both. I know he’s your brother-’
Loki tuned out Rogers’ voice, his gaze still on his lovers.
You know full well it was your actions that brought you here. His mother’s words haunted him. He had attempted to atone for his wrongdoings during the Battle of New York, had apologized to each of its warriors in turn, as well as a public statement which exposed his vulnerable humiliation, that he had been weak and subjected to mental torture.
Anthony and Stephen were the ones who knew the full extent of his shame, the way he woke up drenched in sweat at night, the poison of his tormentors still bubbling in his ear.
Your ambition is little, born of childish need. We look beyond the Earth to greater worlds the Tesseract will unveil.
Even they had seen what his mother had warned him of, a juvenile desire to be loved, to be as worthy of it as his brother, the golden child, the one people adored.
I only wish for the adoration of the two I hold dear.
‘This is not my doing.’ His voice rang clear, heard by every member of the room, but the words were meant for the ones he loved, the ones who were still looking at the footage in disbelief. ‘Why would I bother with inconsequential Midgardians? If I were to mind control anyone, it would be those integral to your society. I’m not a complete idiot.’
Stephen opened a portal, ignoring the way Anthony called out for him, refusing to look at them he disappeared. Loki’s hand clenched in a fist, nails drawing blood that oozed on the floor.
The rejection was clear.
***
There was no beauty in any of the other realms quite like Asgard. He knew he was prejudiced, it was where he had grown up after all, but it truly was phenomenal. He had hoped to bring Anthony and Stephen here one day, but that hope was as foolish as all the other dreams he had in the past.
Holding onto hope was painful.
Leaning his elbows on the marble balustrade outside his chambers, Loki looked over the realm, watching his people go about their lives, oblivious to his suffering. Turning around, he looked to the stars instead, the rich indigo hue of the night sky above, the cosmic brush of purple nebulas spreading out.
This was where he belonged, not on some pitiful excuse of a planet like Midgard. It mattered not if they thought he was guilty of a crime he didn’t commit. In a few centuries none would even remember he existed.
So what if Anthony and Stephen perished in that time? He didn’t matter to them, therefore he would treat them with the same contempt.
He tugged at the collar of his tunic, irritated by how restrictive it suddenly felt.
Why did they still plague him? Memories of early mornings nestled between them both, their laughter mocking him as he looked over his empty chambers, the apparitions of them both haunting him.
Asgard was his home.
It’s not home without them, his thoughts mocked him.
‘There you are!’ The doors to his chambers flung open, bouncing off the wall as Thor strode in. ‘How did you return home so fast, and without using the Bifrost?’
‘Strange’s eldritch magic allows him to create portals in any of the realms. It was simple enough to combine that with…’ he trailed off, rolling his eyes at Thor’s bewilderment. ‘It’s magic, Thor,’ he scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest. ‘Why are you here?’
‘Why are you hiding like this, brother? You should be in the Avengers Tower, proving your innocence.’
Anthony had given him his own rooms when he had returned to Midgard with Thor. A place of his own, another home. He knew he hadn’t deserved it after the atrocities he had inflicted upon Anthony’s homeworld, that he did not deserve Thor’s kindness after he’d faked his death on Svartalfheim. It was Stephen who Thor had gone to for help, Stephen who had been keeping tabs on him as a dangerous threat.
A threat that he now believed to be true.
Does he really think so little of me?
‘This is my own doing, distrust created from my actions…this is what the Midgardians call karma,’ Loki answered, hands flat against the marble, head hanging low.
‘You have repented for your actions Loki, worked to amend the wrongs you wrought.’
‘Then why are they quick to judge?’ Loki hissed.
‘Because they do not know you as I do.’
‘Even you grew tired of my tricks, my deception. Did it not cross your mind that these were my actions?’ He began pacing in a circle, trying to stop the restless energy he felt, the betrayal sitting heavily upon him.
‘Loki, when have you ever not boasted about something you have done? I know you, the way you act. This is not you!’ Thor implored, taking a few steps closer.
Then why did the ones he cared for most not see that?
‘Your courtship with Stark and Strange is still new. Even as I left Stark was defending your name. You have a fierce champion in that one, and he has more reason than most to be wary of betrayal from those he cares about.’
Those words did stop Loki’s agitated pacing. He had seen the scars upon Anthony’s flesh, knew the shadow of others were carved into his heart, hidden away from everyone he cared about. He did not know the full story of what had happened, even Stephen was tight-lipped about why Anthony had scars on his chest, why he woke up yelling at times, muttering the word Jericho as he calmed down.
‘He spoke in my defense?’ Loki whispered.
‘He did brother, against his teammates, those he regards as his family. Standing up to an enemy takes courage, more so if you stand against a friend. Holding your ground against family when they are doing something you believe to be wrong-’
‘That is a different type of agony.’
‘Go to him, Loki. I will speak to the others on your behalf, but don’t withhold affection from Tony, especially after he fought for you. I can see how much you care about him, about them both. We will work together to right this wrong.’ Thor stood beside him, clapping a heavy hand on his shoulder and squeezing.
‘Do not let this happiness slip through your fingers, brother. You have known too much pain in life, too much suffering. Do not let this imposter destroy what you have worked so hard to accomplish.’
***
‘Loki!’ Anthony called as soon as he appeared in the lab, his hair frazzled and sticking up wildly. ‘Why the Hell did you disappear like that? What’s going on?’
He was worried I would not return.
‘I needed to gather my thoughts on what needed to be done, to think about the next course of action. This imposter will suffer the full extent of my wrath,’ Loki hissed, sitting on the edge of one of the worktables and looking around the space. This was Anthony’s sacred sanctuary, a place few had access to.
It was a glorious place, a forge of sorts where Anthony could craft miraculous technology, creating a unique type of magic born from his intelligence and artistic creativity. Now, holograms of battle plans filled the space between them, the footage of what was happening playing on an endless loop.
‘Why are you here?’ Loki demanded, gesturing to the video playing with a careless hand. ‘You should be fighting with your team.’
‘The whole part of being a team means we work together…or something like that, I’ve never really been very good at it,’ Anthony growled, mirroring Loki’s posture on the opposite worktable, glaring at him. ‘Cap’s taken point, I’m doing recon.’
‘I know how this looks…that I have given you reason to doubt me, but-’
‘This isn’t you, Loki,’ Anthony interrupted, anger still sticking to his skin in a black miasma that Loki could almost see shimmering in the air.
He frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. ‘Then why-’
‘You ran off! You didn’t trust me to handle the situation. You immediately thought I would believe SHIELD, that I would believe the worst.’ Anthony growled, hands tightening where they gripped the edge of the table.
He looked at him then, truly looked at the stubborn mortal who had given him a second chance, who had given him a home while offering his hand in friendship. He’d always believed out of the three of them that Anthony was the strongest. Admiring a being who had been betrayed by his family, who had been tortured by those who wanted his tech, could still trust after all of that. This, intelligent, tough mortal who had accepted his apology with a smile and a drink.
Everyone deserves a second chance, and they don’t come around that often. I got mine, why shouldn’t you get yours?
Pushing himself off the worktable, Loki approached him, stepping through the holograms and the endless feedback loop of his apparent guilt to stand before him.
‘I did, and I’m sorry, for thinking so little of you.’
Despite how he was more comfortable talking about his feelings around the two he cared for, it was impossible for his tongue to shape the words of the fears circling around in his mind.
Will Stephen come back? Will he believe me? Have I lost you too, Anthony?
‘He’ll come back,’ Anthony told him, prying his hands free of the worktable and massaging his fingers, dropping his gaze from Loki’s. He forgot how perspective Anthony could be, and he hadn’t stopped to consider how Stephen’s absence might be affecting him too.
Loki let the wash of happier memories flow over him, how the three of them had begun this tentative relationship from a night of alcohol-infused braveness and a desperate longing they had all felt but never thought the others shared.
Stephen had approached him first, not as inebriated as Anthony, kissing him with a passion Loki had not received in decades, too enthralled with revenge and anger at Odin. He had forgotten what a lover’s caress could feel like, how its touch could soothe past aches and rage. He smiled in remembrance of Anthony’s moan of longing as he watched them, how he and Stephen had broken off their kiss to reach out for him, including him in their embrace.
An acute pain spread through his chest as the memories twisted into Stephen’s expression from before, the disbelief and distrust from the meeting.
‘I’ve never given Stephen a reason to trust me,’ he admitted, the words catching in his throat as he stood there, exposing his fear.
Anthony hopped down, his anger dissipating as he approached, his concern trumping any earlier irritation. ‘Hey, no, don’t go there. You didn’t force him into this.’
‘Anthony, we’re not in a committed relationship.’ Loki spoke the truth even as he opened his arms for the mortal to step into, holding him close, thankful for the forgiveness. ‘But that does not mean I don’t wish to be. Before this happened, it was my intention to approach you both about a change in our relationship.’
‘We didn’t really go about this in a conventional way,’ Anthony answered, a hint of his arrogance that Loki secretly adored seeping through.
‘This is my doing, my payment for the suffering I created,’ Loki managed to force out.
‘Loki, I don’t think Stephen doesn’t believe you,’ Anthony argued, leaning back to look at him, his mouth parting as he looked up. Hesitant hands reached up to clasp his face, a thumb wiping away a tear he hadn’t been aware of shedding.
‘You did not see the look on his face,’ Loki whispered, leaning into the touch.
‘Yes, I did,’ Anthony told him with a firm tone. ‘Listen, I don’t want to play the whole, I’ve known him longer than you, card…but I knew him before he became a wizard, or whatever he is now. I know him, seen what kind of man he is, as well as how he deals with trouble. He’s arrogant, thinks he knows better than anyone-’
‘Which one of us are you describing, darling?’ Loki said with a self-deprecating chuckle, lifting his hand to cover the back of Anthony’s. Even with the agony he was plagued with, he couldn’t help the smile at the slight blush blazing across Anthony’s cheekbones. Anthony had always been weak to endearments of affection, and despite the self-loathing plucking at him, he promised himself to use them more in the future if it elicited such a response in one he held dear.
‘Stephen’s always been alone, dealt with things alone. I’ve had years of locking horns with Cap, no offense-’
‘None taken.’
‘Stephen hasn’t been doing the whole superhero gig for very long. He isn’t great at communicating, even at the best of times. I’m willing to bet my company that he’s out there searching for a way to clear your name, or an explanation.’
‘Your faith in him, in me, is that strong?’ Loki asked in wonderment.
‘It is.’
‘Others have betrayed you, those you cared about… why am I not doing the same?’
‘Are you?’
Loki had always loved Anthony’s eyes, the alien exoticness of them. Many Asgardians appeared the same to him, blue or green eyes, flaxen blonde hair, beautiful in their own way, just as Stephen’s multihued ones were. But the deep brown of Anthony’s, the shade of the soil from which life grew, the bark of the trees he used to lean against while studying, the deep rich shade of the coffee both he and Stephen drank was exquisite.
Now, they were watching him with a raw vulnerability that made Loki want to destroy any who had put that fear inside his heart, the ache of wanting to be loved but feeling like he was unworthy, the hurt of being rebuffed over and over, but still willing to try, to extend a hand to Loki despite the betrayals.
He is courageous, braver than most Asgardian soldiers I know.
‘I swear to you, Anthony Stark, on both my life and my honor, as worthless as it is, that this is not my doing,’ Loki swore, reaching down to kiss his hairline.
‘I know, Lokes.’
‘These words come too late, but I swear I would never intentionally hurt you, and if I do, I will do everything in my power to fix what I have broken.’
‘They’re not too late,’ Anthony told him, leaning back so they could kiss. ‘But we’re missing our wizard, so, let’s hold off on declarations until we find him,’ Anthony murmured against his lips.
His words destroyed the misery surrounding him, his fears of what if. He wasn’t certain of Anthony’s belief that Stephen trusted in him, but wallowing in his melancholy and twiddling his thumbs was unbecoming of him.
‘The way he disappeared suddenly makes me think he had a plan, or at least he was going to hide in that library of his until he came up with one. FRIDAY? Can you tell me where Stephen is?’
‘He’s not on Earth, boss.’
‘What do you mean he’s not on Earth? Where else would-’
‘She cannot locate him if he’s in a different dimension or off-world,’ Loki answered for her, beginning to believe Anthony’s words that his other lover sought the truth.
Or he was hiding beyond Loki’s reach.
‘See this was why I wanted you both to wear suits I’d created! Homing beacons,’ Anthony hissed, stretching his neck from side to side as he thought.
‘I believe I may have a way to find him,’ Loki admitted carefully, unsure how this admission would be perceived.
Anthony stopped in his stretches, regarding him.
‘It is not a tracking beacon, but it’s a spell that allows me to keep an eye on you both, to know if harm comes to you,’ Loki tried to explain, watching Anthony’s reaction carefully.
‘Aww, you say the sweetest things. I’ll suit up, let’s go.’
***
Loki recognized where they were as soon as his feet hit solid ground, his magic clearing the illusion from his mind. Anthony was not as fortunate, tumbling from his arms as Hel’s magic claimed him.
‘Anthony!’ He lunged forward as the mortal crashed to the floor, trapped within his own personal torment, metal fingers scrabbling at his helmet.
‘Tony!’ Another voice called out, and Loki looked up in disbelief as Stephen dropped down to his knees on the ash flaked floor, fumbling at Anthony’s neck for something. ‘You dragged Tony here?’ Stephen shouted, his disbelief crackling into fury.
Loki didn’t have time to rebuke the question, frantic with worry at Anthony’s state of mind, the anguish he’d unintentionally exposed him too. Rolling him onto his back, he held him still as he writhed and twisted, using more of his strength than he usually did with them both to restrain him.
‘Where is that damn…found it!’ Stephen exhaled, yanking off Anthony’s helmet and flinging it away from them. ‘Tony, sweetheart, breathe! It’s not real whatever you’re seeing, it’s not real.’ Each of his fingertips glowed orange as he moved his hands up to Anthony’s waxen face, his eyes darting wildly in their sockets as his nightmares tormented him.
‘Not that!’ Loki snapped, grabbing hold of Stephen’s wrist with enough force to break his bones.
‘I know how he feels about it, but it’s the only way to stop it. Let me go,’ Stephen growled, his Cloak rising menacingly behind him as they stared each other down.
Gritting his teeth, Loki did as he was asked, powerless to watch as Stephen used the thing Anthony hated most to rip him free of his suffering. Anthony came around with a shuddering gasp, repulsors lifting to point at their faces ominously as he struggled to amalgamate where he was.
‘Lokes? Stephen?’ he croaked, swallowing thickly as he tried to force moisture down a wrecked throat.
‘You’re safe, darling. We’re in Hel. It’s a realm that shifts to mimic whatever would torture you most. I’m sorry, I did not realize this was where we would be taken to, otherwise I would have taken preventive measures.’
‘We’re in…Hell?’ Anthony gasped, looking at Stephen.
‘It’s in the Niflheim realm, but essentially sort of. It’s a place where the dead reside. It’s not evil or good, it just is…’ Stephen explained, getting to his feet and offering his hand down to Anthony.
‘So…is this what is looks like for real? Wow the menacing grey clouds just scream…you know what I don’t even care where we are…why are you here?’ Anthony demanded, nodding his thanks to the Cloak who had brought over his helmet.
‘I’m here because I’m tracking the magic source that’s affecting the people back home, and that brought me here.’
Anthony turned in a circle, no doubt mapping out the area that Loki and Stephen had only read about in books. It was a desolate place, cragged mountains stretching into a dark endless sky, no life growing on the stones on which they stood. It was not intended as a place of rest, it was one of the realms of death in the Nine Realms, and it changed for each individual.
For those who saw themselves as guilty, it changed to reflect that, torturing the victim with punishment.
‘Did you find out whoever is behind the attacks?’ Anthony’s voice, distorted by his suit crackled out, following Stephen’s finger as it pointed down into a ravine.
‘Balder?’ Loki gasped, taking a step back, his movement dislodging obsidian pebbles which clattered across the floor.
‘A friend of yours?’ Stephen snapped.
‘A friend of Odin’s now turned enemy. There was a prophecy speaking of how his death would bring about Ragnarök so Odin in all his wisdom decided to make him invulnerable. He had hope by doing so he could ward of the destruction of Asgard but-’
‘It destroyed his mind,’ Stephen finished for him, watching the white haired individual down in the ravine.
‘After decades of living a miserable existence, losing those he loved, he came to me begging me to save him of this curse, or the boon as my father decreed,’ Loki told them, the wind whipping around them, chilling him to the bone.
‘Why you?’ Anthony asked.
‘Because I was the only one who would dare face Odin’s wrath. I was stuck in my rebellious phase and would do anything to undermine Odin’s authority.’
‘I remember that phase well,’ Anthony mumbled. ‘I don’t think I really grew out of it.’
‘I found his weakness and tried to end his life,’ Loki continued, ignoring him. ‘But Odin did not relinquish his favorite so easily. I thought he had finally died a warrior’s death fighting for Asgard.’
‘He became trapped in limbo, without a body. His soul still bears the mark of Odin’s magic, but there is another source, a magic that feels like yours,’ Stephen shouted over the wind.
‘Not mine, my mother’s. She taught it to me, it is her touch you feel upon his soul. He’s trying to escape here,’ Loki said the last part to himself, putting the pieces together. That was why the mortals were acting as they were. Midgard held the weakest creatures in the Nine Realms, their minds were malleable, their bodies weak.
‘He’s looking for a host,’ Stephen understood.
‘Is that what has been happening, parts of his…ghost have been infecting people-’ Anthony said in bafflement.
‘Yes. He’s using the remains of my mother’s magic to attempt escape.’
‘But why now?’ Stephen questioned.
‘I do not know. I should take him back to Asgard, back to Odin. Perhaps he knows of a way-’
The three of them were blasted from their feet at the surge of energy thrust at them, screams curdling in the air, buffeting them with the sound.
‘Can you free him? Stop this from happening?’ Stephen shouted as he flopped onto his stomach, struggling to get to his feet.
‘Are those…what the fuck are those!’ Anthony shouted, tapping on the side of his helmet as he zoomed in. ‘Are those zombies?’
‘Some of the inhabitants of Hel. I can undo my mother’s magic, but he will not be standing at the end of it,’ Loki called to Stephen, wincing as another blast buffeted them, tearing into their skin like razors this time.
‘He’s already dead and suffering, help him, Loki,’ Anthony demanded. ‘I’ll keep the zombies away, just get to…whatever his stupid name was.’ He kicked off into the air and down towards the hordes of wraiths protecting Balder.
‘Tony, no!’ Stephen shouted after him. ‘Why did you bring him? I was handling it!’ Stephen shouted, flecks of amber forming in his hands.
‘He is more than capable of looking after himself, and as I recall, my choice of allies was limited!’ Loki shouted back, calculating the risk, the quickest way he could get to Balder.
‘I had it under control! Despite the obvious fact that Tony’s suit is useless here and you’ve put him in danger, who is looking after Earth?’
Loki gestured down to where Anthony was blasting the creatures away from him, ridiculously overpowered now those he cared about were in danger.
‘Just get to him. I’ll watch your back,’ Stephen hissed, his Cloak carrying him down into the battle.
Loki gave Balder a look down in the ravine, his suffering palpable even from this distance. Another victim of Odin’s manipulations, another pawn in his quest. Preparing to teleport down, Loki froze at the teasing whisper surrounding him.
‘It seems like our father’s solution to every problem was to cover it up.’
Trickery from the realm, Loki dismissed it as such as he teleported down to clean up another of Odin’s messes.
***
Loki stepped through Stephen’s portal last, ensuring nothing nasty followed them as they tumbled back into the Sanctum. Dusting off his tunic, he noticed Stephen had taken them directly into his rooms, a surprise, considering the strained tensions between them. Anthony immediately went to the corner of the room, talking to his teammates, leaving Stephen and Loki to stare at each other uneasily.
It had only been here, hours ago that he had considered asking them both for a committed relationship. Even though Loki was immensely grateful for his rooms at the Avengers Tower, the way Anthony had attempted to furnish it to his liking, it was here Loki enjoyed spending his time the most.
Stephen’s bed chamber reminded him of his study back on Asgard, the secluded sequestered feel, books piled in heaps around the room, quite often making their journey into bed precarious as you could not walk across Stephen’s floor without inadvertently knocking his texts over.
It was a place of learning, of safety and solace. He could sense the residual magic lingering in the air, iridescent whisps of amber woven into the fabric of reality. Loki could spend an eternity in here reading, shut off from his responsibilities, and when the cover of night fell, he spent a myriad of hours worshiping Anthony and Stephen’s bodies.
‘Cap says they’ve got it under control, the people the zombie dude was trying to invade have all returned to normal, or as normal as they can be considering,’ Anthony told them both, tugging off his helmet and placing it on the leather ottoman at the foot of Stephen’s bed.
Loki shoved aside any feelings he had towards what had happened, making a mental note to speak to Odin about it before he suppressed his thoughts.
Would that happen to him? Would he turn into a soulless wrath mourning the loss of the ones he loved unable to move on?
‘And my honor?’ Loki asked instead, not giving into the despair gnawing at him.
‘You’re probably not going to get a sorry, but I’ve yet to get one out of Steve…so I’d say you’re in the clear. However, I’ve told FRIDAY to turn a blind eye to any pranks you may or may not pull in retaliation,’ Anthony said with a grin.
The air turned thick, an impenetrable wall now between them all.
I’m sorry. Sorry that you doubted me. Please forgive me. Loki thought the words, wishing they could both hear his silent plea.
Anthony moved first approaching Stephen, who in turn, didn’t move, watching the movements with a guarded gaze. Loki fought the urge to laugh. For all that Stephen liked to tease him about how powerless he was to Anthony’s beguiling eyes, he watched from up close how Anthony ensnared him with the very same look, Stephen’s expression softening as he lifted a hand to cradle his face.
His shaking thumb stroked over the darkening bruise on Anthony’s cheek bone, leaning down to kiss the other side of his face, his lips lingering against his skin as they remained close to each other, basking in the knowledge they were safe, that they had protected their home world.
For the first time since they’d begun this relationship, Loki felt like he was intruding on an intimate moment, a clear sign that he was no longer welcome among them.
He’d been stabbed before, and this felt no different, a blade into the very heart of his soul, sundering it away from his body.
Turning to teleport away, Anthony’s distressed noise made him hesitate and he looked back to see the man approaching him, hands outstretched.
It was a common enough intimacy, their sensuous acts bolstered by the adrenaline of a fight, the jubilation of a victory and this was no different, even if it was tinged with disbelief of Stephen’s doubt. Kissing Anthony deeply, he heard parts of his suit dropping to litter on the floor, the process aided by Stephen’s eager hands.
‘Why do you both have ridiculous costumes!’ Anthony spat with annoyance from where he was wedged between them, fumbling with the clasps on Loki’s outfit before fumbling with the many ties of Stephen’s.
‘Someone’s growing frustrated,’ Stephen teased with a deep rasp, giving him his full attention, but not helping him with any of his struggles.
It was easier to focus on Tony between them rather than deal with the unspoken hurt he felt towards Stephen. He reached down to sweep Anthony’s hair back with his fingers, cradling his head as he brought him close for a kiss, loving the feel of his lips against his, overjoyed that his past mistakes hadn’t cost him this happiness.
‘You’re beautiful when you are eager for us both,’ Loki mumbled against his mouth, slipping his hands over his shoulders and dragging Anthony’s undersuit down with his touch, revealing bare shoulders for Stephen to feast upon, the rasp of his facial hair against skin tantalizing, and he stopped for a moment to watch them both. Anthony’s head leant back to expose his neck, unabashed in his want, his desires which Stephen exploited, kissing along the vulnerable skin, lifting his gaze to meet Loki’s.
He found it difficult to hold his stare, even as he lifted a hand and stroked his index finger over the front of Anthony’s throat, moaning silently at the shudder Anthony gave him, the trust he proved. He never forgot how he had gripped the mortal’s throat in his hand, how he had flung him from a window. It was a sin he could never atone for, and this simple trust bestowed upon him made him want to weep.
Loki felt Stephen was trying to communicate something in his heated gaze, his blue eyes blazing beacons under his lashes as he watched him, not stopping in his kisses of Anthony’s throat. The flash of a pink tongue rasping across Anthony’s skin sent a burst of lust thundering through him, his mouth parting at the intensity of it.
He went along with the movement of Stephen walking him backwards with Anthony between him, his attention now back to Anthony who was swearing with his frustration, his fingers useless as he attacked Loki’s clothes.
‘Honestly, darling, how many times have I shown you how to do this?’ Loki breathed out as the back of his legs hit the mattress, Anthony’s suit now down to his waist. He was helpless against the urge to touch, splaying his hands out over Anthony’s stomach and up over his chest, meeting Stephen’s along the way.
They both hesitated as their fingers touched before entwining them, covering Anthony’s gnarled scarring over his chest, the fragile tender heart that had been betrayed too many times, a heart Loki would fight wars over to keep safe.
Anthony’s knees fell either side of Loki’s hips as Stephen crowded him closer together, undoing his tunic top and shrugging out of it, allowing Loki the gorgeous aesthetic of seeing their different skin tones together. The creaminess of Stephen’s skin bore only a few scars from battle, still young and supple, and it contrasted prettily against the honey-drenched warmth of Tony, littered in scars much like he himself was, a testament to the battles he’d faced.
‘I can’t think,’ Anthony snarled in frustration as he struggled still with Loki’s tunic top, giving up in exasperation and sitting on top of Loki’s hips, twisting so he could reach behind and engage Stephen in a kiss.
It truly was a wonder watching them both kiss. Their tongues always clashed in some form of dominance, eliciting swooping feelings of desire deep within his own gut as he saw a sliver of a slick tongue, a muffled moan that one of them swallowed. He believed he could achieve orgasm by simply watching them together, the franticness of their coupling, but he was too impatient tonight, tormented by his own fears that he had nearly lost them.
Anthony tore away from Stephen’s mouth with a gasp as he realized his leather restrictions had vanished, now perching upon bare skin, the lingering effects of Loki’s magic still shimmering in the air.
‘Can you teach me how to do that?’ Anthony begged, splaying his hands over Loki’s stomach, his eyes dark with the force of his want, his thighs clamping down on his hips as Anthony succumbed to his desire.
‘Not a chance. It is far more interesting to watch you writhe,’ Loki told him, dragging him down for a kiss, one hand holding the back of his head as the other trailed over the bumps in his spine, rocking his body closer with one hand on his hip. Peeking through one eye, he watched Stephen disrobe, his body involuntarily flexing towards Anthony’s arched body above him, his cock dragging across his body.
Stephen knelt on the bed, encouraging Loki’s legs to spread with hands on his thighs, and settling between them. Anthony’s desperate gasp fanned across his lips as Loki nudged a lubricated finger between his cheeks, encircling the tight ring of muscle. He continued kissing Anthony through the burning stretch of his finger penetrating him, stroking his tongue with his own as he felt Stephen’s tongue beside his finger, both preparing their smaller love.
Anthony’s body shuddered, his spine arching as he flung his head back and his hips down towards their touches, begging them.
He adored his mortal like this, wanton, unashamed of his pleasure. Stephen was more reserved in their carnal acts, uncertain but not unwilling. That particular brand of sweetness was beautiful to Loki in its own way, but it was the uninhibited lust he sought now, wanting to chase any remnants of this horrendous day away with passion.
‘Now…Loki, Stephen, please,’ Anthony begged, hips grinding down to meet their joined thrusts of fingers and tongue.
Usually, they playfully fought over who would take Anthony, both finding it an exquisite agony in saturating the man in pleasure, but Stephen’s lubed fingers covered Loki’s cock, making him gasp and grip Anthony harder as the head of his cock was encouraged to rub against Anthony’s perineum, the touch of Stephen’s fingers and the promised heat of the body above him making his mouth dry.
‘Do not tease me,’ Loki begged, already feeling his heart swell with emotions he’d rather not mention, the emotional trauma of earlier mingling with his relief to have them both in his arms again, his mind swimming with the sensations. He wouldn’t last long, and he growled low in his throat at Stephen’s amusement, his chuckle earning him a shove from Anthony, ever his fierce protector.
Tears of relief burned in his eyes as Anthony sank down on his cock, and they both reached out to hold him steady once he was seated, knowing that he could be overzealous in his actions, lost to his passion.
‘Steady sweetheart.’ Stephen rose on his knees so he could kiss the side of Anthony’s face, and Loki could see it then, the love he had for him, the care he bestowed on him. Stephen was besotted with Anthony. It was evident in his gaze, the way he scolded him when he was frightened on his behalf, the way he kept his coffee warm for him in the morning.
Love wasn’t in the words one person spoke to another. They could be meaningless, worth nothing more than the air taken to create them. Love was in actions, the kindness they bestowed upon him. It was in the ferocious protection he felt for them both, the way he would do anything for them.
‘I thought you doubted me,’ Loki blurted, overcome with the urge to tell Stephen.
His gaze tore away from where he’d been watching Anthony to look at him, his beautiful blue eyes piercing Loki’s chest, the feeling lodging in the marrow of his bones.
‘I did,’ Stephen admitted, allowing Loki to feel the pain of the truth for a moment before he continued. ‘For about a split second.’
‘We knew it wasn’t you, Loki, we love you,’ Anthony whispered, his hands teasing down his ribs as a quivering one soothed over his thighs.
‘Have done for a while now,’ Stephen told him. ‘I trust you, implicitly.’ He left Anthony’s side for a moment, stretching out on the bedding beside Loki and encouraging his face towards him with a hand. ‘I’m sorry if you thought I doubted you. I love you,’ he murmured, kissing him lightly, fingers skating down the side of his neck.
‘Feelings later, more sex,’ Anthony whined, provoking a gasp from Loki with a squeeze of his muscles, rocking back carefully with a long drawn out moan.
‘Demanding mortal,’ Loki hissed, gripping Anthony’s hips and encouraging his movements.
‘Your demanding mortal,’ Anthony sang down at him, lifting up so only the tip of Loki’s cock was encased within his body before slamming back down.
‘Yes, my demanding mortals,’ Loki amended, accepting another kiss from Stephen, moaning as his tongue slipped inside, just as needy as the one on top of him. They kept up the pace for a while, hearing the slippery glide of flesh against flesh, Anthony’s moans floating down to them as he sought his own pleasure. Loki’s muffled gasps joined the melody as Stephen plundered his mouth, his wandering fingers occasionally stroking over his nipple before he would retreat, driving Loki mad with the sensation.
Anthony suddenly let out a noise akin to a breathless shriek, and Loki immediately withdrew from the sorcerer beside him to give him his full attention, panic making his hips still. His terror of carelessly hurting him abated as he saw where Stephen’s wandering touch had ended up.
He was a creature possessed as he lifted onto his knees, helpless to the feeling of Loki deep inside him, and Stephen’s hand on his cock, working in tandem. Plating his feet flat on the bed, Loki met his thrusts, tossing his hair out of his face, sweat stinging his eyes as he marveled at the magnificence that was Anthony Stark on the brink of orgasm.
Loki knew of his past, that Anthony too had used intimacy as a way of hiding away from the vast chasm a lack of love had created in his life. This defenselessness he witnessed now, the way his body succumbed to Loki and Stephen’s touch was enchanting. He had never believed he could love another being, had been told time and time again that he was incapable of such a thing, and he knew the same echoes tortured Anthony.
This was a form of healing, an expression of love at its purist form, and as Anthony yielded to his pleasure, his seed spilling over Stephen’s hand, Loki felt lightheaded, close to his own release.
Being with them both makes me feel whole. I found what I was missing, what I had been searching for.
Together as one, Stephen and Loki reached out to catch Anthony as he tumbled forward, pushing back his sweat soaked hair and muttering endearments to him, Loki’s magic leaping over his skin as he sought out any hurts. When Anthony’s breathing finally calmed, drifting in a place of contentment, Stephen reached out for him, rearranging them so Anthony was beside the wall resting, leaving them both to face each other.
‘You thought I’d abandoned you?’ Stephen asked, wrapping his fingers in Loki’s hair.
‘Yes.’
‘Loki…I…’ Stephen faltered. ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered, turning over his shoulder to look at Anthony. ‘Did he think that too?’
‘No. It was Anthony who convinced me you weren’t running away from me, from us.’
Stephen closed his eyes in relief before his gaze returned to Loki’s, want, desire, love simmering between them.
‘I’ve always been…fearful of love. I do not think I truly understood its meaning until I met you both, until we engaged in this. I know this is the wrong way around-’
‘I know, sweetheart, me too. I’ve never been in love before…and I couldn’t just fall in love with one person at that. I need both of you,’ Stephen mumbled, his eyes suspiciously bright.
Loki encouraged him to lie on top of him, kissing him even as he opened his legs, pleading with him.
‘Are you sure? I’d understand why you’d not-’
‘I’m sure, Stephen. But… I can always ask Anthony if-’
He laughed into the bruising kiss Stephen gave him, gasping at the spell Stephen used to relax his muscles. It was an unspoken promise that neither of them used magic to prepare Anthony, nor did they involve it in intimate activities due to his terror of magic, but with each other it rose to meet and combine, licking against ancient power, coaxing it out to play, binding them together on a plane not limited by the physical.
When Stephen breeched his body, it felt as though the ache within was finally sated, his magic gleefully twining with the man’s above him, feeling his own magic leap in response, settling over his body in an intimate caress. Stephen was the only being he’d experienced this with. Asgardians feared magic, preferring battle, and he had yet to meet a being with magic that intrigued him as Stephen did.
His climax that had already been bubbling close beneath his skin suddenly felt closer, a ghost of a touch playing over his cock, Stephen’s will bending his magic to heighten Loki’s pleasure.
A hand touched his shoulder and panting he looked up, meeting sleepy brown eyes. Stretching an arm up he clasped the offered hand, kissing the back of Anthony’s knuckles even as Stephen continued to move inside his body.
The affection in his gaze was too much to bear, the pleasure Stephen was inflicting on his body devastating, seizing with pleasure as he surrendered, both of his lovers holding him through it. Stephen’s forehead rested on his collarbone as he too struggled through his release, his gasping breaths hot against Loki’s sweaty skin.
They lay there, limbs entwined and bodies boneless as they came down from their highs, reassured by the comfort and the feeling of the others close by.
‘I need a shower,’ Anthony recovered first, stretching and yawning as he sat up, grimacing at the click in his bones as he stretched.
‘Second that,’ Stephen agreed, lifting his hips to withdraw from Loki’s body, kissing him when he hissed at the sting. ‘Coming Lokes? Want me to carry you?’ he asked with a grin, yelping at the pinch he was given at the skin above his hip.
‘I am far stronger than you both combined. If anyone shall be carrying anyone it shall be me,’ Loki told him haughtily, sitting and smiling at Anthony’s laughter. ‘Before we wash, there is something I wish to discuss.’
‘Can’t it wait till we’re clean? Preferably in bed?’ Anthony asked, his eyelids drooping with his exhaustion.
‘No. Before anything else happens, I wish you ask you both if I can court you properly. No more meeting solely for sex. I wish to be in a committed relationship with you both.’
‘Didn’t we already do that with the I love you?’ Stephen grumbled, rubbing at his reddened skin.
‘No.’
‘Loki, baby, we’re here for the long term. If it makes you feel better to say you’re courting us, then that’s what it is, but I’m committed to this, to you both.’ Anthony’s gaze swept up to include Stephen. As if just realizing something, Stephen’s gaze went wide, and he leant over Loki’s body to cup the side of Anthony’s neck, resting their foreheads together.
He hasn’t told Anthony of his feelings yet.
‘I love you, douchebag.’
Loki didn’t quite understand why they insisted on calling each other such condescending names, but it was a testament to a time before, when Loki hadn’t been in their lives, and he watched as Anthony melted at the affection, his happiness no different from when Loki used endearments.
Midgardians were strange creatures.
The End
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