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Deep breath in, deep breath out . Was it normal to be this nervous about properly meeting your son’s boyfriend? Cynthia shook her head and cleared her thoughts. Everything would be fine.
The footsteps got closer. Connor came into view and as soon as he laid eyes on her, he slipped. And slid down the rest of the stairs.
“Well, that’s one way to come down,” she smiled at him.
“Oh my god!” Cynthia heard Evan exclaim and hurried footsteps followed.
Connor was staring at her wide eyed. She simply kept smiling at him, she hoped she looked natural.
“Con, are you -” Evan made eye contact with her too. “Oh.”
“Hi guys,” Cynthia said. She heard Connor swallow hard.
Evan looked between her and Connor, who had not moved a single muscle since landing on his butt on the last step. She could visibly see Evan’s brain working, he was debating on something. Eventually, he seemed to settle whatever he was thinking about. Evan tentatively worked his way around Connor and approached her.
His fidgeting increased and he kept glancing down as he extended his hand. “Um, h-hi. I’m - I’m Evan, Mrs. M-Murphy.”
Cynthia took his hand, but didn’t shake it, just held it in both of hers. “Nice to meet you, Evan,” she smiled and Evan blushed. She let go of his hand and began to make a cup of tea. “And please just call me Cynthia. Are you a friend of Connor’s?” she asked, reaching for her mug. She wasn’t going to force it out of either one of them, but she’d like to have an idea of how she should be looking at them then if not as a couple.
Evan blushed even more than she thought was possible and Connor’s eyes were about to pop out of his sockets. It was as if her son couldn’t believe that she was being so calm about Evan being in the house.
Evan quickly glanced at Connor, almost as if expecting some help on what he should say, but got nothing. “Um, mhm,” he quickly nodded, hands picking at his polo shirt. Was he trembling?
“That’s great!” Maybe some conversation could ease up the nerves. “How long have you two known -”
“Mom,” finally Connor spoke and grimaced slightly as he stood. “Um,” he walked towards them. She could see that he was trying to put on a mask to hide any sort of emotion, but he couldn’t fool her that well anymore. He was nervous, he was scared. And it made her frown slightly. He shouldn’t be scared. And certainly not of her .
“Of course, honey,” if he thought he was putting himself between her and Evan discreetly, he was so wrong. Connor was blocking them.
“Could you wait for me in the living room,” and he wasn’t really asking.
Her eyebrows furrowed. But she didn’t want to put him on edge, especially since he actually seemed to have a reason to want her out of the room. And a quick glance at Evan told her why; he was breathing irregularly and his eyes were shining with unshed tears.
Oh.
Something was obviously wrong and Cynthia quickly made her way into the living room. She could vaguely hear the refrigerator door being opened and Connors voice telling Evan to breathe and not chug.
Poor thing, she didn’t mean to make him nervous. God, now she felt bad. Well, she was certainly doing well at not embarrassing her son or his boyfriend.
After a couple moments, Connor came into the living room and his steps slowed as he got closer. He didn’t know where to go from here.
“Let’s sit,” she offered and they both wordlessly sat across from each other on the sofa.”so…what’s up?” Connor’s incredulous look at her basically summed up how much she also cringed at herself.
In her defense, this was new territory for her.
“You’re not going to ask me why I’m not at school or why Evan’s here?” Connor’s leg started to bounce rapidly.
“You wanted to talk to me. Which one do you want to talk about?” She asked him. “Or do you want me to start?”
Connor looked everywhere but in her direction. Then he sighed. “What do you want me to say?” he asked defensively.
And that caught her off guard. “What?” she blinked.
“You obviously know something’s up with -” he gestured over to the kitchen, meaning ‘Evan’. “You’re not as subtle as you think.”
“Neither are you.”
His head snapped up. “What?”
“Connor,” Cynthia scooched closer to him, tentatively putting a hand over the one he had resting on his knee, and stopping his bouncing leg. “Honey, I know you, ok? Don’t think I didn’t miss that small obsession for…that winter closet guy you went through in middle school.
She smiled softly at seeing Connor’s cheeks go slightly red. “Edmund Pevensie,” he muttered.
“Right,” she chuckled. “And now that we’ve been working on things again, I can read you much better. Hon, there’s no reason you should be scared or nervous to tell me something as important as…this.”
Connor sighed and she could literally see him relax. There was so much tension that just left him with that exhale. This was good.
He bit his lip and ran a hand through his hair. “You want me to say it, huh?” the slightest hint of a smile showed on his face.
“I’d like to hear it from you, yes,” Cynthia nodded and gave his hand a reaffirming squeeze. “Only if you want to and if you’re ready.” she whispered.
“Mom…Evan’s - he’s…” come on, sweetheart; you can tell me . He squeezed her hand tightly. “Evan’s my boyfriend.”
She didn’t care that he rolled her eyes at her when she smiled widely. “How long?”
“Three months. And we’ve known each other for seven.”
“That’s great. But, Connor, why hide it for so long?” She tucked a strand of hair behind his ear and he slouched on the couch.
“ Because ,” he said that like it explained everything.
Which it did not. “Because…” she prompted.
“Because this was new to me. Having a friend, liking someone, lov -” he glanced at her and sighed, knowing he couldn’t really backtrack on what he’d started to say. “Loving someone was new to me. The whole thing of being and having a boyfriend was new. I don’t know. I guess this was also something I liked exploring and having to myself for a little bit,” Connor picked at his nail polish. “And no offense, but I also didn’t think you or Dad would be fine with it, so.”
“Ok. Well I am taking offense to that,” because Connor should know that she and Larry support him. She made a mental note of that being something to work on with her son and husband. “But, let’s move forward a little bit. How would you say you guys are doing?”
Connor snorted. “I don’t deserve him.”
Cynthia frowned. “I don’t want to hear that.”
“You sound just like Evan.”
“Good,” she’s loving Evan more already.
Connor closed his eyes for a second before talking. “I love it. We communicate well, we have fun, he treats me so well.”
“And you do, too?”
“I hope so. Evan’s never told me otherwise,” he joked and Cynthia couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Well, now that we’ve talked about that; why weren’t you at school?” she made sure her voice didn’t sound accusatory. She wasn’t mad at him, she just wanted to know why he hadn’t gone.
He sighed and put a hand to his forehead. “It’s just a bad day. As in, I woke up and felt so shitty.”
Language, hon. “As in physically or…”
He sat up. “Both. I don’t know how to explain it. I hadn’t felt so great the past couple of days,” she slapped his hands away from each other when she realized he’d started picking at his skin, drawing a bit of blood. “And I don’t even know why. I just…I just felt…so numb and sad and pathetic and miserable. I didn’t sleep well all weekend either. And in turn that gave me an awful headache. That’s the best I can describe it for you,” he sighed.
“Sweetie,” that had actually hurt. Oh, Connor. “You should have told me, or your dad, or Zoe.”
“I didn’t want you guys to think I’d gone back on the progress we’d made.”
“Connor, we get that there are going to be bad days. And we’re here to help you through those. Now, I’ll write you a note for school, but next time, please tell me when you’re starting to feel like this instead of letting it culminate,” please, honey .
She felt a huge wave of relief at him nodding softly. “Ok,” Connor whispered.
She couldn’t help but hug him and felt her heart warm up when he leaned into her. She planted a kiss on his hair. My baby . When did he get so big?
“Now,” they separated, “would it be too much to ask for you to give me some time alone with Evan?”
Connor choked on his spit. “Why?”
“‘Why’? Honey, your boyfriend of three months is in the kitchen and has obviously been here before, don’t you think it’s time I get to know him a little bit? Without you in the room.”
“But…” Connor glanced towards the kitchen. “Mom, he has really bad anxiety and in case you haven’t noticed, he’s not great with new people. Trust me, he was worse when we first started talking,” he smiled fondly and Cynthia laughed softly.
“So then, what do I do to ease up the tension or make him less nervous?”
“Why are you talking like I’m going to let you talk alone with my boyfriend?”
“Either you wait in the other room or I can make you run some errands. It’s happening, sweetie,” she patted his knee and Connor put his hands on his face, groaning loudly.
“Fine, five minutes -”
“Ten.”
He glared at her, but she kept her smile on her face. “Fine,” Connor said through his teeth. “He loves trees. As in will go on a rant and forget he even has anxiety. So that’s something you could bring up. Do not bring up or talk about his dad, sore subject,” she nodded along. “His mom’s ok. He watches a lot of TV so you could bring up some shows or movies,” Connor looked like he really didn’t want to say it, but he went ahead anyway. “And then obviously there’s me, but for the love of everything that is good in this fucked up world, please don’t embarrass me.”
“Dear God Connor, you kiss Evan with that mouth?”
Her son grabbed a cushion and screamed into it, making her burst out laughing.
“Things like that,” he moved his hair from his face.
“Ok, I won’t embarrass you,” she stood up and made her way to the kitchen. “Remember, I get ten minutes.”
“Believe me, I’m counting.”
Evan was sitting on one of the stools on the island. A water bottle halfway through and he seemed to be on his phone by the way he was looking down on his lap.
Cynthia knocked on the entrance to not startle him as much. Evan turned around and immediately straightened his posture at seeing it was her. “Hi M-Mrs. Murph-phy.”
“Evan, honey, please call me Cynthia.”
“Right,” he nodded.
“I’m sorry if I made you nervous earlier,” she slowly worked her way to sit across from him.
Evan’s eyes widened. “Oh, no! O-of course n-not. If anything I-I’m so-sorry for reacting t-that way. It’s just -”
“Honey, don’t apologize,” Wow the kid could talk fast. “It’s ok.”
“Still…” Evan played with his fingers. “I just, I-I have a h-hard t-time talking t-to people because o-of…I have a-anxiety.”
“I get that,” she nodded.
He glanced at her and smiled a bit. “T-thank you.”
“So, Connor and I talked a bit, and he did mention you guys were a couple.”
Evan looked a little shocked. “H-he did?”
“Yeah,” she couldn’t stop the smile that took over her face. “How’s my son treating you?”
“Oh,” Evan blushed hard. “Um, he’s b-been amazing Mrs. M - Cynthia?” he said tentatively and she nodded in encouragement. “Connor is just absolutely w-wonderful.”
“I’m glad to hear that. So, Evan, I would like to get to know you a little bit, and thanks to Connor I have limited time,” they both laughed at that and she was glad to see Evan relax a little more with her. “He tells me you like trees?”
His eyes lit up. Wow, they were so blue. “Yes, I do!”
And as Connor had said, Evan did go on a rant, spilling many interesting and scientific facts about trees with his stuttering almost completely gone. They talked a bit about Bridgerton , turns out Evan liked the series as much as she did. He talked about his mom, which the way he talked so sweetly actually made her want to meet Heidi Hansen. And of course, they talked about Connor.
“You know, when he was a kid he used to bang his head on his pillow in his sleep,” she chuckled.
That wasn’t embarrassing, it was just something cute right?
“He actually does that still,” Evan grinned.
Her eyes and smile widened. “Really?” she hadn’t seen him do it in a while.
“Yeah,” Evan unlocked his phone and pulled up a video. “He took a nap one time when he was over at my house and I caught him doing it,” he slid his phone over to her and sure enough, there was Connor, sound asleep on a couch, and a couple seconds later, banging his head against a pillow, and Evan snickering behind the camera.
“Aw!” she gushed. “My boy!”
“Time’s up!” they both heard Connor say and he walked into the kitchen. “Evan,” he whined when he saw what Cynthia was watching. “I didn’t think I’d have to worry about you embarrassing me.”
“Think of it as payback for when you showed my mom a video of me singing,” Evan shot back.
“Touche,” Connor took a seat on the stool next to him.
“You sing?”Cynthia slid Evan’s phone back to him.
“O-only to myself, f-for fun.”
She nodded and checked the fridge. “Have you boys had breakfast yet?”
“I haven’t, have you?” Connor asked and Evan shook his head.
“I can make up something if you guys want.”
Connor shuddered. “Please don’t,” Evan smacked him in the shoulder as if to say ‘don’t be rude’.
“Oh hush,” Cynthia pulled out some eggs. “I guess we can forgo the gluten free thing for today.”
“Can we make it an everyday thing?”
“Hmm,” she had to admit, she was getting a bit tired of having to buy specific brands and she did miss eating out every once in a while. And both her kids definitely weren’t liking going gluten free. “We’ll see,” she said, but it was a ‘yes’; she’ll tell them when they’re all home. “Evan, honey, how do you like your eggs?”
“Anyway’s f-fine, Cynthia. Thank you so much.”
She almost laughed at seeing Connor raise an eyebrow at Evan calling her by her name. Evan just shrugged.
“Don’t mention it, sweetie. Would you like anything else with them? Some bacon maybe?”
Connor slammed his head against the island and screamed into his arms.
What did she say?
Evan blushed and rubbed Connor’s back. “I-I don’t eat pork. I’m Jewish.”
“Oh,” she felt where Connor was coming from. “Sorry, hon.”
“That’s c-completely ok,” he smiled.