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To Teruhashi, who lives her days as God's favourite, being unhappy seems like an impossible concept.
Sure, her brother is annoying, and he gets creepier with every year, but he's never done anything drastic, believing that just the closure of being family is enough. For now.
Still, being perfect just means she should be happy, which is true. She is truly blessed, so she does her best to bless everyone else, too. By granting them her presence.
For years now (she would argue even since her birth) this was how she spent her days.
Because there's nothing better than sharing her beauty with the world, and so making it a better place.
That is, at least, until her and Saiki's paths crossed. Suddenly there was someone that didn't bow infront of her, that wasn't blessed by her mere presence.
At first she felt annoyed, trying to make up excuses for why he would ignore her. Then she got determined, creating plan after plan to make him offu at her.
All the while, she herself caught feelings, like a fool. Suddenly it wasn't about just making him acknowledge her perfection, but to indulge in something deeper than that.
No matter how much she tried to run away from it, these feelings followed her. Honestly, she was worried what her fans would've done with Saiki if they found out. After all, she was too good for him. He wasn't even close to her level.
But...that's not really the truth. None of it.
Instead of her shattering his world view by agreeing to date him, he rejects her even before she could say anything.
Obviously he had a valid reason.
Even if her heart felt like it would break any second, nothing followed. Somehow his rejection didn't hurt like it should. Maybe she knew from the beginning, somewhere deep inside of her. Hidden behind all her desires, her efforts to be perfect. She is perfect, yes. But to be, one must maintain.
Saiki threw a wrench in her life once again, making her realize she was never in love with him in the first place.
She'd laugh about it, but the idea made her feel worse than any heartbreak ever could.
How could she be a perfect girl, if she couldn't even fall in love?
Aromantic
That's what Saiki said he is.
That's what she figured out she is, too.
In hindsight, maybe that's why she felt such a deep connection to him. Not out of love. But out of a mutual understanding. Maybe she felt they were the same, to a certain extent.
And looking over the cup she's gently drinking from, Teruhashi thinks that she's glad they are.
That there's someone else who's like her, even if it's the boy she spent months desperately chasing.
Just as she finished her thought, Saiki looks up from his now empty plate, and his eyes immediately roam around the room in search of a waiter.
Teruhashi knows that he always asks for seconds, which is why she doesn't understand why he doesn't just buy two to begin with.
Maybe he's just shy.
Shaking her head, she decides that it's silly if he is.
He's never been shy around her, likely the only person to ever not be either shy or absolutely enamored.
Teruhashi has seen him express more excitement at coffee jelly than at the prospect of being close to her.
And slowly, she's starting to realize that it feels nice.
Don't get her wrong, she loves her admirers, and she loves upholding her duty as the sunshine in people's lives, but...
It's nice to just get to take a break from all the staring and the expectations. Saiki does neither look at her for longer than necessary (it even seems like he's avoiding looking at her, at which she would be insulted, if he didn't also avoid looking at everyone else), nor does he ever expect her to do anything.
As a waiter puts down a new coffee jelly infront of Saiki, he sighs in content and a small smile forms on his face. A light blush coats his cheeks.
It seems silly now, her old belief that they would be good together. Saiki is more interested in his dessert than the person sitting infront of him.
For some reason she doesn't actually mind.
-----------
Teruhashi is walking down the hallway, greeting the students that walk past her (their eyes sparkling and their cheeks stretched into a smile), when she catches a glance of pink hair standing in the door to a classroom that is decidedly not theirs.
Slowly, as to not seem too excited to the people around her, she walks up to Saiki and stands behind him, looking to where Saiki is so intently staring at.
(Which is different to his normal expression, which always seems bored and only half present. He only ever looks like that when he's talking about sweets. Or sometimes a new game he talks about, that, when she tries to search it up, never has any results)
At first she doesn't see anything in particular, besides students glittering around the room. Until she realizes he is staring at a student.
The boy, in her opinion, looks as avarage as could be. In that way Saiki and he are similar, even if somewhere back in her mind she knows that that's not right. Otherwise there's not much to say. He's kind of boring. A type of person that would get lost in a crowd of people while wearing a bright yellow shirt.
Besides her, Saiki shuffles and turns to look at her, at which she jerks back. His expression is like nothing she's seen before. If she didn't know better, she would think there are stars in his eyes.
For some reason, his expression drops slightly and he scoffs. She rolls her eyes slightly, but only after checking that no one would be able to see. Even after all this time, sometimes she just can't figure him out.
[That's exactly the point. Isn't he brilliant? This is Satou Hiroshi and he's completly avarage.]
Even someone with no knowledge of who Saiki is would be able to figure out how enamored Saiki is with the guy.
That thought makes her pause, and she stares at Saiki's face for maybe a second too long, because he pauses too and a confused and slightly annoyed expression settles on his face. The "What?" he's trying to say goes unspoken.
Sighing, she answers, "Nothing, it's just. You're acting... Like...nevermind...."
Like I did when I did everything to have your attention, she doesn't say, because he trusted her enough to come out to her and she won't doubt him.
There's a wheezing sound and for a moment she's scared that Saiki is choking, but he just stares at her in shock, before shaking his head.
"Come on, Saiki. We have to get to our next class."
And she starts walking, sure that he will follow.
Yes, Saiki will manage to figure it out himself. He somehow always does.
------
While the rest of the world revolves around her, their friend group revolves around Saiki.
Before, she never realized it, but everyone is practically glued to Saiki's side.
And sure, the boys will still stop and stare and stutter (at which she practically preens. She takes pride in herself afterall, and Saiki is almost laughably hard to impress or even move) and the girls still compliment and hug her, but at the end they still gravitate to Saiki.
It's not like she isn't the same without realizing it, her eyes seek out Saiki first.
And yes,she did it since her eyes laid first upon him, but back then it was to admire him.
Now it's more of knowledge that everyone will be there. (He'll be there. Not as just a boy or a crush. But as a friend)
Nendou will pull his chair and sometimes even his table to sit by Saiki. The pink haired boy will then sigh in annoyance but won't tell Nendou to go away.
Kaido and Kuboyasu will join together.
And before she knows it, she's there too, with Chiyo and Mera.
Hairo will sometimes join them, while doing exercises.
For some reason everyone decided to pull up their chairs today and sit around in a circle. She bets if they could, Saiki would sit in the middle and they would surround him instead of just creating the circle with him.
Teruhashi doesn't know if it's some unspoken desire of the group to protect Saiki (Protect him from what?) or if they want to admire him unconsciously.
At one point she might've been jealous, but now she finds it a little funny.
Saiki is looking around the group with a blank expression but his body is practically excluding an aura off annoyance.
None of them even twitch, so used to Saiki's behaviour. Especially because Teruhashi knows it's only a front. Saiki might like to pretend otherwise but he's truly soft on the inside.
Out of the corner of her eye, Teruhashi sees Saiki send her a glare, at which she just smiles sweetly.
Her aura of beauty tenfolds, and she hears people gasp and awww- around her.
Still no reaction from Saiki, as to be expected, but she secretly hopes he'll crack one day.
Nendou, bored by just causally sitting around, slams his hand on Saiki's table so hard she worries it will break in two.
"My pal! Let's get Ramen together after school. Sitting around is making me hungry.", he exclaims in a voice far too loud for the inside.
Saiki seems to agree because he grimaces and looks like he's about to decline.
Which doesn't sit right with Teruhashi, it's such a nice day and she won't let Saiki waste it away.
Before anyone can reply anything, she says "We can even find a place with dessert."
And enjoys as she sees his resolve snap. If only she knew he was so easy to convince just with the promise of sweets since the beginning.
[Good Grief. You're a chore to be around. Double the offer and you're paying.]
Gasps resound around her, there's a squeak from what she's sure is Kaidou, but she doesn't turn around.
"Saiki! You can't treat a lady like that. Especially not Teruhashi! What if she needs that money for something important?"
And while she's flattered by their defense of her, she's starting to learn that Saiki has kind of a mean bite to him. He's always been sarcastic, but it seems like they collectively decided to overlook it. And sure she feels bad about it, but also excited, knowing something about Saiki, that the others don't seem to.
Holding up a hand, and waiting until thr others quiet down, she narrows her eyes and meets Saiki's. Finally she opens her mouth,
"Fine but you're paying for my ramen."
And Saiki immediately holds up his hands and she takes his in hers. They shake hands, while everyone else looks on in confusion.
[Deal]
Right now it's not about making any profit. For Saiki it's just about now having to pay for his beloved sweets, even if thr price for the actual lunch might come out higher than the desserts. He really likes to indulge, huh? She thinks and smiles softly.
He's kind of weird but she doesn't mind.
------
After exams are over, Saiki finds her hiding in an abandoned corridor.
It's not actually an abandoned corridor, and it's not even been anything but a simple corridor a week ago.
But someone started a rumor that the corridor is haunted by a student that was killed by a wall that randomly exploded and suddenly everyone started avoiding it.
She doesn't know how he found her, he somehow always does. Just as how they always revolve around him, he always seems to know when they are in trouble and where to find them.
Turning her back to him, she tries to hide the tears in her eyes, but his cold gaze meets hers and she knows immediately that he does, too.
So she just drops her head and sniffs quitely. It's not something she would allow herself normally, but the corridor is empty and even if Saiki would decide to say anything, no one would believe him. Not like he would talk in the first place.
Saiki doesn't say anything, just stands at the end of the corridor. It sort of looks like a stalker from a horror movie or a twisted kind of bodyguard, but she appreciated his, kind, if awkward gesture.
Before she knows it, she's ranting to him.
"... And then a student walked up to me after I left the room, asking me on a date to celebrate finishing our exams. And, I wouldn't have said yes anyways, there's more important things to worry than dating some high school boy that doesn't even make enough money to sustain us two, but it just reminded me that...that I won't date! And how...how can I just not date. Everyone expects me to find someone! That's why they ask me out constantly, after all. Hoping that they'll be the chosen one. And i could settle down, but I don't want to lead anyone on, and it makes me feel sick and-"
Sometimes she wishes that Saiki never introduced her to her identity. Maybe she would have lived in perfect ignorance for her whole life and married a handsome man and settled down and they would've had two children. One girl and a boy.
But now her hopes lay shattered at her feet.
Sighing she rubs her eyes and stands up slowly. Saiki still hasn't moved. And now that she thinks about it, he seems pretty emotionally stunted. What teenagers show so little emotion on their face that you have to study their microexpressiond to even slightly figure out how they are feeling?
Poor Saiki probably never thought about stuff like that, and now she's making it seem like being aromantic is bad! Which, it isn't! It's just that she shouldn't be!
There's a tsk and suddenly Saiki is in front of her. For a moment she pictures a cat instead of Saiki. It's a white cat but for some reason it's wearing his glasses and those clips he wears on his head (she still hasn't figured that out. She doesn't judge him, she just wonders. It's different from his other clothing choices)
The thought makes her ponder. Saiki is creepily similar to a cat. Grumpy and annoyed and always looks like he could use a nap. Easily manipulated by food (sweets), would probably scratch you if you tried to pat his head.
To test her theory, she lifts an arm but he catches is before she can touch his hair. She bets it's soft, which would only prove her theory right.
[Listen. Teruhashi. There's nothing wrong with being aromantic, and especially nothing wrong with you being aromantic. Just because you want to be as perfect as possible doesn't mean that you need to have a husband and children. Nothing is ever perfect in just one way. If you decided to stay single your whole life, your fans would decide to cheer you on even harder because you're independent. You don't have to bend yourself to their rules, they will rewrite every rule as long as it makes you happy. No matter how creepy and disturbing they are because of that.]
While Saiki speaks she stares at him in shock. Not only is it the most Saiki has ever said at once, but it's also surprisingly empathetic.
She takes out a tissue and dries her face, while pondering. Does he maybe relate afterall?
Saiki sighs heavily and it sounds like he carries the whole world on his shoulders.
[My mom always wanted grandchildren so I never mentioned it, but one day I got so frustrated I blurted it out. Instead of being disappointed she just hugged me and told me it's alright as long as I'm happy, because that's all she wants for me. My dad just scratched his head and asked if this'll mean I'll live with them forever.]
Ah so he's a mommas son, is her first thought, and her second thought is how adorable Saiki and his mother are together.
Somehow his speech made her feel lighter. Maybe there's still some doubt, but she's sure she'll manage to work through it.
-----
Storming out of the house while it's starting to rain isn't a good idea, she admits.
But she was just so annoyed at Makoto.
His advances are the same as ever but she just needs a moment of silence for herself, which he just won't grant her.
And now she's sitting in the rain, drenched from head to toe.
She didn't even take an umbrella, and she certainly won't go back.
Let Makoto worry about her, he deserves to be stressed too.
With a hmpf, she kicks a small puddle and feels a twisted sense of glee at the water soaking through her shoes.
Emotions are always better hidden in the rain, where no one can see when her shine dims just slightly.
Suddenly the raindrops stop hitting her head, and she looks up.
A girl, with pale pink hair, is standing infront of her.
Kuriko.
She's holding an umbrella over Teruhashi and standing close enough to hide under it too.
Teruhashi blinks. "Kuriko? What are you doing here in this rain?"
Kuriko just mentions her to follow. [Cafe]
Ah. Kuriko is just like her brother. Teruhashi wonders if she's as easy to bribe, too.
As they walk, she belatedly remembers that she doesn't have any money, so she tries to stop Kuriko but Kuriko just shakes her head.
[I'll pay]
And when Teruhashi tries to reject the offer, Kuriko grabs her hand and pulls her into a building.
Compared to the muddy and grey street outisde, the cafe is warm and painted in soft colors.
Worried that she'll drench the room in water, she looks down on herself and is suprised by the fact that she's dry.
I coudln't have dried already, could I?
Though she doesn't get a chance to think about it further because a waitress that seems to recognize Kuriko leads them to a table with comfortable chairs.
Kuriko sits opposite her in silence. Teruhashi sweatdrops. It seems to be a sibling thing.
The silence is broken by a quiet meow which makes her turn around in confusion. There's a small cat walking up to them. And Teruhashi realizes that it's not just a simple cafe but a cat cafe.
Smiling, she leans down to pet the cat. Even if she doesn't know Kuriko well, having only met her once or twice before, it feels totally in character for her to visit a cafe in this weather.
Humming she thinks about how they got here and she turns to examine Kuriko. She seems dressed for the weather, so it's not a last minute decision to leave the house.
"Why did you decide to come to this cafe in this weather? If I remember correctly, your house should be some way off from here."
Kuriko just stares at the cat in distant wonder and distaste. Like she can't quiet figure out if she wants to pet the cat or throw it as far away from her as she can. Which is weird because this is a cat cafe. A place where you come to be surrounded by cats and good desserts.
[They have a good strawberry shortcake]
Is the only answer she gets, and she feels like she should be glad she got one at all.
Huh, another thing Kuriko and her brother have in common. She wonders if her brother and her would be similar too if he wasn't such a creep.
The thought of her brother makes her face fall and she would've crumbled the table cloth if the cat didn't jump on her lap.
The silence is only broken by the purrs coming from the spoiled cat.
[I'm not actually Kuriko]
What a weird sentence to hear from someone that is clearly Kuriko, Teruhashi observes. Unless it's someone in disguise.
[No] She sighs. [I'm not Saiki Kuriko. I'm Saiki Kusuo]
Teruhashi pauses and stares. It's rude to stare but she's confused, so she'll allow it for now.
"So, are you... What was the name? Trans? That was it, right? I saw the word while I was researching back then..."
Kur-Kusuo? Saiki just shakes he-his...their head but pauses shortly after and hesitates.
[Well, techically I am. But I don't really think it matters much, it's been so long I could never be anything else. But I'm also...Well, I never cared for a name for it. I guess you could call me Genderfluid. It's when your gender varies over time. This should fit best for now.]
This whole new information makes Teruhashis head spin and she kinds wishes she had a bed to lay down in. Suddenly she gasps.
"Please tell me I haven't been misgendering you!"
And sighs in relief when she receives a shaking head as an answer.
[No. But that's why I'm telling you. It would be unfair of me to expect you to know without me ever telling you. Today you may refer to me with female or gender neutral pronouns, please.] Saiki nods [Thank you. Kuriko is fine.]
Teruhashi nods quickly. It's all so much but she'll do everything to make Kuriko feel comfortable! But wait that means...
"DO YOU WEAR DRESSES? SKIRTS? MAKE UP?"
Kuriko interrupts Teruhashi with a glare. Yep, it's still the same old person she shares a class with.
[I do. Occasionally. But rarely do I have the money to indulge in the pleasures of fancy clothing shopping. My money is better wasted somewhere else.]
As Kuriko says that, she takes a bite of the strawberry shortcake, that the waitress just put down. The waitress also puts a lemon tart in front of her that Kuriko must've ordered.
Teruhashi can imagine what the money is better wasted on, as she watches Kuriko's face fill with glee. And after taking a bite, she understands why. The tart is delicious. She'll have to come back here again. Maybe bring her friends. Kuriko will already be easy to convince.
"You can call me Kokomi, Kuriko. It's only fair after all."
A small nod is the only response she gets so she'll have to make do with it.
After their desserts are eaten, they enjoy the comfortable warmth of the cafe. Outside the rain is lessening and she knows she'll have to go back soon, even if she wished she didn't.
Kuriko frowns. [You should probably tell your parents about your brother's behaviour. It'll be best to distance you and monitor him. He's probably too delusional to realize how wrong his actions are. If someone got wind of his actions, his career would maybe not be over but it would be scrutinized by the fans, which you would do well to remind him off. It will definitely not do anything about his head, but there should be someone better qualified than either me or you to deal with him.]
Kuriko doesn't even look at her as they talk, they are just staring out of ter window, but they still know evactly what she's worrying about.
"I-I'll try. I just feel so bad, even if he's annoying and gross. I wouldn't want to ruin his career."
[If he's harassing you and making you feel uncomfortable in your own house, he deserves nothing else. You deserve to feel safe, too.]
I deserve to feel safe? What does that mean? Teruhashi is safe everywhere! She's God's favourite after all. Nothing bad could ever happen to her. But she doesn't say any of that because Kuriko's eyes extinguish that thought before it can fully settle.
The gaze is too knowing, to heavy and serious. And deep down something moves.
Some year old foundation crumbles under her gaze. Maybe her life is crumbling around her. But if it's because of Kuriko, then she'll gladly embrace it.
Kuriko is safe afterall.
But that still doesn't change the fact that,
"Then what will you do about your brother?
Silence.
Teruhashi sighs.
This is going to be a lot of work.
For both of them.