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"Now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen you guys have an anniversary celebration," Kaveh said, narrowing his eyes as he pointed his fork in Cyno's direction. "I understand that you never fight but don't you celebrate that shit?"
Cyno paused and looked up from his laptop. "I'm sorry but what are you talking about?"
Kaveh put his fork down and looked around at the coffee shop despite it being just the two of them as if asking a room full of people if they just heard what Cyno asked. "What do you mean, what am I talking about - I meant Tighnari? Your boyfriend of almost ten years? A duration you guys never let us forget like yea we get it, it's almost been a decade since y'all met during one faithful day in your junior year of-"
Kaveh stopped dead in his tracks as he saw the most perplexed expression he has ever seen on Cyno. They weren't strangers, by any means, but this is the first time in the four years that he has known his friend that he has seen him this distraught. Kaveh thought he should take a photo and attach it as the official depiction of the word confusion.
Cyno's eyebrows are furrowed, and his mouth was parted as if he had something to say, but the only thing he mustered was a carefully enunciated "Huh?"
Now it was Kaveh's turn to be confused.
"What do you mean 'Huh?' it's not a complex question, Cyno. I was actually just half-joking because you guys never seem to fight despite being together for so long I mean, Haitham and I could never by the way, and-"
"Kaveh," Cyno interrupted as he closed his laptop in front of him, "Nari isn't my boyfriend."
Kaveh laughed before waving his hand at Cyno. "Sure, and Haitham is humble. What's your next joke?"
Cyno narrowed his eyes at him, "I'm serious. He isn't."
"Stop fucking with me, Cyno. I know you guys are all about that lowkey stuff so you keep telling people that. It's not a funny joke, though! What if Nari gets sad hearing that?"
"Kaveh," Cyno looked at him intently, "I'm being serious. I could drop out right now, I swear on it."
There was a beat of silence where Cyno thought Kaveh lagged in real life, like a breathing blue screen of death, but Cyno has known him long enough to know he wasn't just being his melodramatic self this time.
"Are you alright?" Cyno finally asked.
"I'm sorry, I'm reevaluating my reality right now. Wait," Kaveh answered, fishing his phone out of his pocket and, with a frown, putting it on the table. It was on speaker, and it rang two times before the call connected.
There was an immediate sigh at the other end followed by 'What is it this time?'
"Haitham," Kaveh hurriedly answered, "You're my boyfriend right?"
"Unfortunately. Why, are you granting me freedom?"
"Stop, I need you to be serious right now. You're on speaker, by the way. I'm with Cyno and he said!" Kaveh suddenly picked up the phone and put it near his mouth, "He said Nari isn't his boyfriend?!
Silence from the other end of the line, before Haitham responded, "Maybe it's one of his jokes again. That's quite cruel to Tighnari though."
"Right?!"
Cyno bit his lip before gesturing at Kaveh to give him the phone, "I'm being serious, Haitham. He isn't."
He slid the phone back to Kaveh who ended the call after a few exchanges and just stared at him.
"I can't believe this. You guys already look like you're practically married… I didn't even try to go for Nari the moment I saw the two of you together," Kaveh sighed, "I was so sure."
There was a slight pang inside Cyno at Kaveh's statement despite being an obvious joke, and Cyno began to question himself why. He perfectly understood how attractive Tighnari is, and with crystal clear comprehension knew how Kaveh, who valued aesthetics as much as he valued his designs, would have viewed him as a potential partner. What he didn't understand was why he was feeling this hurt over a hypothetical scenario of his friends being together.
"Maybe I should break up with Haitham now," Kaveh grumbled, and Cyno shot him with a dirty look.
"I'm joking, okay? I'm coping. I just still can't believe you and Nari aren't-"
"Aren't what?" Tighnari suddenly asked, slipping into the booth with Cyno.
Kaveh looked over and saw Cyno raising his eyebrow.
"- aren't taking the gen ed class I recommended! Right?" Kaveh swerved, with the prettiest smile he could muster.
"Oh, the drafting one? We both opted for the writing class, sorry. If I'm not that busy next semester I'll try to take it even if I have enough units," Tighnari answered, gesturing at Cyno who instinctively handed him his iced coffee.
Tighnari took a sip and perked up, bringing the cup to his face as if trying to find a label he could read. "We should ask them where they get their beans."
Cyno nodded.
"That reminded me we forgot to stock up on our spices too," Tighnari said, hand on Cyno's shoulder. "We should go to the grocery after our class today and pick some up. Do you remember what else we're missing?"
Cyno has already started listing stuff before his voice trailed off as the echo of Tighnari's voice repeatedly saying 'we' resonated in his head. Holy shit are they domestic.
"Cyno… Cyno!" Tighnari exclaimed and Cyno snapped back, suddenly acutely aware of Tighnari's hand tapping on his thigh.
Cyno blinked at him and looked over to Kaveh who had his eyebrows raised as if saying, 'See? What did I tell you?' as if knowing the complete pipeline Cyno's brain just followed to get to the realization of how everyone thinks they've been in a relationship for how many years. He looked back at Tighnari.
"I'm sorry, where was I?" He asked, finding himself already holding Tighnari's hand that was just resting on his thigh. He quickly let go of it as he felt the heat rise to his face. Cyno mentally cursed Kaveh for dumping this information on him.
"Oh, don't bother. I already finished the list - are you alright?" Tighnari asked, putting down his phone and reaching up to feel Cyno's forehead. "You don't have a fever though. Are you sure you're okay? We need to go to our next class now."
"It's fine. I'm fine, Nari."
Their trip to the grocery store only solidified Kaveh's claim, as Cyno spent a great deal of time acutely hyperaware of Tighnari's every move while they navigated aisles upon aisles of spices and sauces that seemed to extend forever. Frankly, Cyno felt rather silly standing there in cold sweat, tightly gripping the cart as Tighnari compared two brands of cumin.
Thousands of interactions barraged his brain as he followed Tighnari mindlessly, recounting every single interaction they'd had and weighing whether everything was platonic. Tighnari is his friend so they had to have been… right? They had to be. He wouldn't know what to do with himself if they weren't.
Cyno didn't know anymore. He excused himself as soon as he set the remaining groceries on the table and hurried to the bathroom. He tried catching his breath before getting his phone from his back pocket.
dehya, what do you think about me and nari?
historians will say u guys are "good friends"
we are, though?
if u mean as good friends as me and candace, then yea ig
but candace is your girlfriend?
and the sun is still shining, what is ur point??
just… what do you think about the two of us?
what do u mean?? wait… wait- wait, are u finally proposing?
holy shit can u call right now to confirm oh my god im winning our bet!!!
what bet?
kaveh thought u would have already proposed last year but alhaitham said it will take u
"at least 3 more yrs" but i said in a year so i fucking win let's gooooo
btw don't tell candace she'll say it's rude to bet on stuff like ur friends' relationships and whatever
Cyno buried his face in his hands, particularly putting pressure on his eyelids. He sighed and looked at his phone again, only to see Dehya with a whole block of text explaining her bet.
u see… kaveh thought it would be earlier because he thinks tighnari is a god who should be worshiped
idk what's with him and his fixation on that but i do think tighnari is very pretty
anyway, haitham thought it would be later because he thinks you're thinking about financial stability and other adult shit like that
so they think they're smart but really, they're both just projecting
i, on the other hand, think it's in a year because it will be ur 10 year anniversary soon
that's a pretty good number to propose on, right?
right??
cyno???
cyno?????????
Being equipped with the question of whether you like someone and living with that certain someone in question felt like pure torture. And while Cyno never once thought that he would associate the word torture with Tighnari ever, Tighnari's head resting on his lap, softly purring as he drifted deeper into sleep, may as well be equated to the electric chair.
He gently lifted Tighnari off their sofa and beelined to Tighnari's room, putting him down on his bed and tucking him in. And just as he was about to remove his arm from beneath Tighnari's neck, Tighnari reached for him, and as if his body responded before his mind was able to, Cyno found himself encircling his other arm on Tighnari's waist and joining him beneath the comfort of the covers.
Tighnari nuzzled in the space between his neck and the pillows, and the slightest air he breathed out made Cyno's entire body freeze. Cyno could feel his hands get clammy, almost a repeat of his episode in the grocery store, and between the quiet whir of the air conditioner and Tighnari's soft purrs, Cyno almost felt light-headed. It wasn't until his body was screaming at him that he noticed that he was holding his breath.
The contrast between the calm inside Tighnari's room and the melee of thoughts inside Cyno's head slowly drove him insane. Not to mention the scent of Tighnari's shampoo and Cyno's overwhelming urge to just lean down and plant a kiss on his head — but he shouldn't, right? Completely platonic friends, he reminded himself, platonic friends. But his thoughts betrayed him. It would be so easy right now, so unbelievably easy to simply go with his gut and just lean a bit. His bottom lip was already touching some strands of Tighnari's hair anyway, Cyno thought, before catching how flawed his logic sounded.
He swallowed hard, his throat barren, before sighing out loud. This was never even a problem for him before. He has kissed Tighnari's head countless other times for no special reason at all and yet here he is, feeling like he's being tortured by the FBI questioning what this proximity, these little kisses and cuddles and sleeping in each other's beds — what this domesticity actually meant. Truthfully, Cyno would prefer a gun to his head instead of Tighnari's soft, peaceful breaths on his neck — the steady rhythm mimicking a metronome, slowly driving him over the edge.
Cyno removed his arm carefully from beneath Tighnari, and he was met with his face. Cyno couldn't help but smile. He wasn't sure how, and he sure as hell wasn't sure why, but every single emotion welling up inside him was pushed down and he only felt peace as soon as he saw Tighnari's face. The long lashes and the button nose… The curve of his lips…
Cyno stopped himself from touching them, and instead tucked a stray strand of hair from Tighnari's face which seemingly alerted him, ever the light sleeper.
"You're not sleeping with me?" Tighnari asked in a daze, eyelids only half open.
Cyno could explode.
"I will, Nari," Cyno responded, planting a quick kiss on Tighnari's forehead before he even had time to think about it. Tighnari hummed as he snuggled in. Cyno reached out for him and enveloped him in his arms, resting his chin on Tighnari's head. He could feel himself get red in the face, a deafening shout caught in his throat it made his ears ring, as Tighnari mumbled incomprehensibly as he drifted back to sleep.
Well fuck, Cyno thought, his heart ready to leap out of his chest, that wasn't very platonic friend of me.
Cyno wished the realization hit him like a speeding mack truck. Maybe that would have been a better alternative, he thought, like in one of those light novels they used to read. Maybe being isekai-d by a mack truck to an alternate universe where he hasn't been living for almost a decade with the love of his life while completely oblivious of his feelings would be better. But his realization came in waves. Like an earthquake, and each time he thought he has already accepted it, an aftershock of a thought would follow. How come every single one of my friends knew? Does Tighnari know? Oh god, what if Tighnari hates me? Does Tighnari feel the same way? Does Tighnari even look at me like that? Fuck, Tighnari already saw me wasted that's embarrassing. How should I ask him out? We already live together?!
Cyno's head hurt. But between the panic and the natural calamities casually ravaging his brain, he couldn't help but smile. He tried to bite the inside of his cheeks to prevent it, but he ended up just nuzzling Tighnari's hair, breathing in his scent, and getting lost in the freedom of just knowing he is in love with him. He is in love with Tighnari. And when he thought his heart couldn't get any fuller than it already is, he excitedly thought about breaking the news to someone and was again hit by the reality that the only person he wanted to know about it first is Tighnari himself.
Like every beautiful photo of a sunset or every funny post or every personal career choice, the first person he wanted to know is Tighnari. He smiled to himself and hummed.
Tighnari was already cooking their breakfast when Cyno woke up.
The smell of brewed coffee filled their kitchen and Cyno, still dazed and fresh from the bathroom, immediately made his way and set the table before settling in. He stared at Tighnari's figure — hips on the countertop, stirring the pan. There was a slight glow to him today and Cyno contemplated whether it was just a trick of the light or perhaps the lovestruck filter actually existed.
Cyno caught himself smiling again. He didn't know whether it was the confidence that comes with a decade of knowing someone or the sheer excitement of wanting to share the most important news of your life with your favorite person, but he decided not to dwell on these overly complicated thoughts and simply go for it.
He went up to Tighnari and encircled his arms on Tighnari's waist, resting his forehead on his nape.
"Careful," Tighnari said, putting his arm over Cyno's, warning him from being too close to the burner.
All of Cyno's bravado seemed to melt away as soon as Tighnari touched him. He stood there with his arms around him, throat still unbelievably dry, trying to cough up the confidence he so valiantly displayed as he made his way toward Tighnari.
He could feel his heartbeat in his throat.
"Nari…" Cyno started, finally resting his chin on Tighnari's shoulder.
"Hmm?" Tighnari hummed, slightly tilting his head so that their heads touched, as he continued stirring.
"I like you, Nari."
"I know," Tighnari responded nonchalantly.
Cyno wanted to scream. He tightened his arms around Tighnari and rested his forehead on Tighnari's shoulder.
"I love you," Cyno admitted quietly.
He felt Tighnari's movement stop and Cyno's heart lurched in his chest. There was complete silence until he heard Tighnari turn the stove off before he turned to face him.
"What did you say?" Tighnari asked.
"I said I love you," Cyno responded, finally looking up to see Tighnari who appeared like he was about to cry. Cyno panicked at the sight and cupped his face in a hurry, "Nari? Oh god, I'm sorry. Do you hate it that much? Oh, fuck. Please don't cry. Please pretend I never said that, I'm taking it back—"
Cyno stopped dead in his tracks as Tighnari put his hand on top of Cyno's and brought it near his mouth, placing little kisses on his palm before finally asking, "After making me wait for so long? You’re taking it back, hmm?"
The warmth of Tighnari's breath on his palm made every strand of hair in his body stand.
"No," Cyno responded, inching closer until he was a breath away from Tighnari's lips. He gulped, "Do you want me to?"
"No," Tighnari said, looking at Cyno's lips. His back was resting on the countertop and he pulled Cyno in so that their hips touched.
Cyno's bottom lip grazed Tighnari's and he almost flinched.
"Can I—?" Cyno asked, their breaths intermingling.
"Go on," Tighnari smiled, placing his hand on Cyno's nape.
Cyno leaned in, and as their lips touched he cursed in his head at all the liars who said kissing the love of your life was something explosive — all fireworks and firecrackers and alarms blaring. He retracted the thought, though, considering those same people probably haven't been unconsciously pining for their best friend for as long as he has. Perhaps their passion really was explosive, while theirs was this quiet, unassuming one. Because kissing Tighnari felt like being home, the overarching thought of it summarized in one word: Finally.
And Cyno doesn't know what he expected but it surely wasn't this familiarity, as if it was the most natural thing in the world to have his lips against Tighnari's. As if he has always known it — that of course, they are this soft. Of course, he smiles in between these little kisses. Of course, he lets out a little sigh after. Of course. It's his Tighnari, after all.
“You taste like mint,” Tighnari teased, his lips still glistening as he moved his face to look at Cyno.
Cyno decided that the lovestruck filter wasn't real, and Tighnari actually looks this good without trying. He gave in to the temptation of leaning in and kissing him again. Just because he can.
“We share the same toothpaste, Nari,” Cyno deadpanned, as if his chest wasn’t so full it could burst.
He kissed him again.
Kaveh squinted at the two of them across their usual booth in the cafe, and Haitham moved Kaveh by nudging him over with his hip as he set down his cup of coffee. Kaveh immediately put his left leg on top of Haitham's as he propped his elbow on the table, looking at Cyno and Tighnari closer.
Haitham was about to move Kaveh's leg when he pressed it down even more before leaning back and frowning. "There's something about the two of you today."
Cyno and Tighnari looked at each other. Brows furrowing as they pretended not to know what Kaveh was talking about.
"Did you change anything, Nari?" Cyno asked.
"Eh, I don't think so," Tighnari responded, looking over at Kaveh still with a perplexed expression.
Haitham paused from reading, took a quick glance at them and sighed before regarding Kaveh, "You should prepare the 10 thousand mora."
"Huh? I already paid my share of this month's rent, what are you talking about?"
"Dehya," Haitham answered curtly. Kaveh turned to him.
"What about Dehya—" Kaveh started, before his eyes widened and he reached over to check Tighnari's hand. And sure enough, there it was. A simple, silver band with an emerald engraved rested neatly on Tighnari's finger.
Kaveh settled back down in disbelief.
"You motherfucker," he narrowed his eyes at Cyno — the smile plastered on Kaveh's face genuine and proud. He then turned to Tighnari and as if a switch was flipped, was back to his melodramatic self. "I can't believe my Nari is getting hitched to this buffoon. I shouldn't have told you anything, Cyno! I could've broken up with Haitham and gotten with Nari already!"
Haitham was side-eyeing Kaveh throughout his speech, his brows furrowing as Kaveh dug himself deeper with each sentence.
"Yeah?" Haitham asked, his eyebrow raised.
Kaveh sucked in a quick breath before turning to Haitham with his loveliest smile, patting his leg. "I'm kidding! You already know I love Nari. Cyno is alright too, I guess."
"Wow, thanks," Cyno responded dryly.
"Seriously though, congrats," Kaveh finally said, his tone all sincere.
Beneath the table, Tighnari intertwined his fingers with Cyno's and leaned to his side, resting his head on Cyno's shoulder. Cyno’s chest tightened. And yet he found himself tightening his grip on Tighnari’s hand, squeezing it as if to say this is where it was always meant to be.