Chapter Text
When it’s done,
there is nothing.
Gabriel sits on the edge of the bed, fumbling with his empty pack of cigarettes.
God, he needs a cigarette, when did he get through the entire pack again? He should go to sleep instead… he’s come a long way and he’s so tired. He’ll stay awhile – yeah, it’s not like anybody is waiting, now that he’s gotten rid of Clark, and Hugo, Nicky and he are fighting. He’ll stay a few days, maybe even weeks, or months? He’s not in a rush, now that he’s- home.
Gabriel lies down. This is good, he thinks, this is okay. The ceiling glares down, perfectly white paint that hasn’t even chipped in all the years Gabriel’s spent here, on this bed, staring up. There’s a sort of comfort in Mercury’s consistency, the way that nothing ever changes in this house. How it never will. There will always be another boy, and another job, and then there will always be Gabriel, as unchanging as that paint.
His head is cloudy. He should sleep, it’s just the exhaustion making him fuzzy, after all.
His fingers twitch. A vial of blood in his hand. Oh, that’s nothing, dear. But he’d said wait, wait-waitwait like there’d been something important.
But that’s nothing, dear.
Gabriel should sleep. His eyes close almost of their own accord.
And there is nothing; nothing left now.
You should sleep-you-should-sleep-SleepSleepSleep
A young woman, smiling down at him.
And he should sleep, but she’s not Mercury and he can’t see her face, but he can still hear her voice, and she tells him to be brave, to run, run, run!
Gabriel jerks forward with a gasp, the kind of gasp that comes after a nightmare except he doesn’t think he was asleep.
His eyes fall to the nightstand, to the book. Gabriel put it there with purpose but kept the cover closed with purpose too. But now the woman who isn’t Mercury is saying run, run, run so he flips it open and stares, and the thing is, he’s not surprised to find the new name. He knew, didn’t he? A part of him knew. But nothing ever changes, and he knows- he knows there’s nothing left that a name scribbled in a book could salvage.
Gabriel knows these things, but now he’s staring at NATHAN, messy letters taken out of context. He stares and stares and has the passing thought how if this was a movie this would be the moment the memories came rushing back, and Gabriel would gasp Nathan’s name and like some ancient magic it would break Gabriel from the hold Mercury’s had over him as long as he can remember.
But this isn’t a movie. All Gabriel has is a name.
No, what this is, is the moment Gabriel will close the book with a bone-tired sigh, no longer able to bring himself to look. He’s going to turn away and go to sleep, and tomorrow will be the same as every other day. Nathan, just a passing thought. Just one more nightmare full of hollow, erased faces.
Unless…
Unless.
Gabriel has a name.
And a vial of blood. Byrn.
The boy who scribbled NATHAN in Gabriel’s book needs his family’s blood.
And that’s not nothing.
Gabriel lands in the grass near Wolfhagen, the vial carefully cushioned in his coat. He’s careful not to think about Mercury or the little boy who helped him knowing what that would cost. The boy was the one who whispered Wolfhagen to Gabriel once he returned with the blood, unsure where to go or even if he should be going at all.
Gabriel shakes the thoughts off, picking himself off the ground. There’s one thing he knows and that is that he needs to find Nathan Byrn.
The conclusions draw themselves once Gabriel reaches the heartless corpses, signature of Marcus Edge. There’s a moment of panic when Gabriel wonders if one of the bodies might be Nathan, that maybe Gabriel would never even know. But something keeps him moving forward, navigating the twisted hallways until he reaches a room,
and a boy.
Gabriel reaches blindly, his hands gripping the boy’s jacket and pulling close, not even flinching at the way the boy tenses and growls before recognition settles in the brown eyes.
“Nathan.” Gabriel breathes.
“What are you doing here?” Nathan Byrn responds.
Gabriel takes him in - the soft, relieved smile; hands that grip Gabriel’s before he moves a step away, almost like an afterthought.
“Did you get my blood?”
Gabriel takes the vial out of his pocket.
“See, I knew it’d be okay.”
“You should drink it.” Gabriel says because it’s not, really.
Nathan Byrn takes Gabriel’s free hand, twisting to look at his watch. “It’s not dawn yet. Let’s find Annalise.”
Gabriel follows Nathan through the house. He’s selfish enough to be thankful Nathan is delaying the blood giving, because that’s a few extra minutes Gabriel can justify staying. And he hates himself for those thoughts when he comes to with blood and broken glass on his shirt-
And Nathan, running shaking hands over Gabriel “You’re okay, you’re okay-”
“Nathan…” Gabriel shows him the broken vial.
“It’s okay, Gabriel, it’s okay.” Nathan is saying now, bringing their foreheads together and all Gabriel can think is that this can’t be how this ends, not after all that. Not after Gabriel came back for him. He can’t have come here just to watch Nathan die.
Gabriel is numb as he follows Nathan through the house once again.
They find Annalise, and something falls into place when she runs into their arms, clinging to them both. He recognizes Annalise’s face, can call up some vague memory entangled with what’s been erased. He almost shakes with the relief of something, anything remembered.
Later, Gabriel stumbles at the sight of Hugo on the floor with an empty chest. He remembers that they fought, that it was bad. He can guess the reason now, but either way, Hugo had been something of a friend, as much as Gabriel let people close enough to be called friends.
And then they’re outside, and Nathan is sitting on the stairs, giving up, and Gabriel is furious. Or maybe he’s just sad. He’s finally done it - defied Mercury, and it still doesn’t make a difference. Everything still stays the same and for a stupid moment, Gabriel had stupidly convinced himself it didn’t have to.
He doesn’t tell them. How could he do it now? So he smiles and keeps up the banter and doesn’t make Nathan’s last moments about himself. (He wishes he could put this moment in the book - Nathan’s body pressed against his side; I love you both making his head spin with things he knows he’ll never have the time to understand)
It’s after, and maybe there’s something left after all.
Gabriel is the first to rise from their protective cocoon of arms and legs next to what’s left of Annalise’s father.
“We need to move.” He tells them because he’s realized neither of them is going to move and Gabriel can’t be a mess if they are. So he pushes it all away, prioritizes. “They’ll be coming for us, we need to get someplace safe.”
“Where?” Annalise whispers after a moment, when Nathan fails to react at all.
Gabriel sighs. “I have a place.”
And they drag themselves into the safehouse after dark on the same day, exhausted and traumatized and covered in blood.
“Nobody knows about this?” Annalise asks, the first words spoken between the three of them since they’ve decided to move.
“Nobody.” Gabriel repeats, praying that he’s right. He’s sure this is one of the safehouses he’s managed to keep from Mercury, but he can never really be sure of anything.
He casts a glance at Nathan, still in some kind of post-heart-eating shock, then at Annalise, covered in her own father’s blood and clearly trying not to shake as badly as her body wants to.
“Shower.” He decides. “Then bed. Definitely in that order.” He guides the pair upstairs, feeling some kind of déjà vu as he turns to leave them to wash up.
“Wait.” Annalise grabs his sleeve. “You’re leaving?”
He glances between the pair, eyes landing on Nathan’s vacant eyes, now clearer as he too stares at Gabriel expectantly.
Gabriel doesn’t know what to do with that. “I- have some things to do- set up protective wards.” He stumbles over his words and leaves before he can see their reactions.
Gabriel waits for the shower to shut off, listens to make sure his two- somethings settle into bed. He does set up wards, even though they’d be futile against her. Then he takes a shower himself, dragging it out. And then he knows he needs to go before he inevitably brings her right to Nathan and Annalise. They’ll be safe now, safer without him.
Gabriel only makes it to the kitchen before his body stops, and he can’t bring himself to take another step if it leads him closer to her and away from them. He can’t move forward but he can’t turn back either, so he slides down the wall, rests his heavy head in his hands as what’s left of the adrenaline leaves his body.
The morning after three traumatized teenagers arrive at the safehouse in the woods is a bad one.
Annalise drags herself out of bed at noon, having spent the night plagued by nightmares, and Nathan follows several hours later, still stuck in some kind of daze. They move to the living room and sit together in front of an unplugged TV, unspeaking. At some point, Annalise disappears into the kitchen and comes back with two bowls of dry cereal, one of which ends up in Nathan’s lap. And about an hour after that Nathan manages to get to his feet long enough to stumble into the kitchen as well for some water in the vain hope of washing the taste of Soul’s blood away.
He notices Gabriel sitting on the floor, staring at nothing, and Nathan frowns and tries to say something but no actual sound comes out.
Nathan only really comes to the next day, when the shock’s finally worn off and his body’s begun to adjust. Annalise still seems sort of numb, and Nathan feels bad that he hasn’t been there for her considering she’s the one who had to murder her dad for them, and Nathan’s the one who ate the man’s heart after.
“You okay?” He asks softly.
Annalise gives a noncommittal shrug. “Sure. You?”
Nathan swallows the pain. “Sure.” He echoes.
But it’s a start. And it’s when the two begin to come out of their stupor that it becomes clear something is very wrong.
Gabriel is sitting in the exact place as yesterday, if Nathan’s vague memory of the day can be trusted. And he isn’t speaking, like at all.
“How many powers do you think I have now?” Nathan tries asking when several attempts at ‘are you okay?’ and ‘what’s wrong’ have no reaction.
“Are you angry at me?” Nathan asks eventually. “Is it because I almost died again?” He tries optimistically because that would be an easy fix. “Or because of the water tower thing? Because I’m really sorry, but also I was trying to keep you safe. And you know, also hoping you’d get my blood, which you did, so…” Nathan gulps and after a moment adds, almost shyly: “Are you angry because I kissed you?”
Nathan watches for a reaction but it’s almost like Gabriel can’t hear him at all. “I hope you know I wasn’t- I wouldn’t- what I’m trying to say is, it meant something. Or it did to me, but I think it did to you too.” He breathes. “You’re not going to say anything?”
He starts to think maybe Gabriel can’t.
Annalise goes to talk to Gabriel next, once Nathan tells her what’s going on. But she comes out twenty minutes later with a pinched expression, shaking her head slowly.
“He didn’t say anything?” Nathan guesses.
“Nothing. I- I don’t understand. Is he in shock?”
“Maybe.” Nathan thinks. “That’s bad right? I mean I’m no doctor but I’ve seen enough films to think three-day long shock is bad.” Especially for a blood witch with advanced natural healing. “Should we call somebody?”
Annalise seems to consider it. “It’s too dangerous. And we don’t exactly know anyone, Nathan.”
No one we can trust, she doesn’t say but Nathan hears all the same. All the people they trust that are still alive are in this house.
“Besides, a few hours ago I could’ve said the same about you. Or even myself. Maybe he’s just… taking longer to come out of it?”
That makes sense, except… “But he was okay, wasn’t he? I mean in Wolfhagen, after…”
“I thought he was-“ Annalise hesitates “he seemed like he was when he guided us here.”
---
They guide Gabriel to the bedroom, hoping whatever is plaguing him is something he can sleep off. As they plop him to the edge of the bed and Annalise starts working on getting his coat off, still covered in dirt and pieces of her father, Nathan can’t help but kick himself for being such an idiot. How could he be so self-absorbed he missed that Gabriel needed him? That both of them needed him?
Suddenly Gabriel flinches, grabs Annalise’s wrist before it can make contact with him.
“What the-” Annalise gasps.
For a moment both her and Nathan are frozen, unsure. But Gabriel’s eyes are still unfocused, still not with them. Nathan’s eyes catch on the little book sticking out of his coat, a hair’s breadth away from Annalise’s hovering hand.
Uh-oh.
But Gabriel’s heart is racing. Nathan finds himself crouching beside him. “It’s okay, she’s not going to take it, it’s alright.” He tries to soothe, holds back the urge to pull Gabriel close like he had on the floor of Wolfhagen.
“I was just going to put it away.” Annalise swears, shaken when she catches on. “I’m not going to touch your book, okay? I promise.”
Somehow between their reassurances, Gabriel’s grip on Annalise’s hand goes slack, and his eyes go back to that frighteningly vacant stare directed at nothing.
Nathan swallows heavily, exchanging a worried glance with Annalise. He shakes his head at her silent question - he doesn’t understand the strange reaction either. It was clear from the start the book was important, but back on the boat Nathan had reached for it carelessly, or at least he’d pretended to be nonchalant about it, and Gabriel hadn’t protested, even if his heart had sped up.
Annalise finishes getting Gabriel into bed and hesitates, catching Nathan’s gaze again. He knows she’s wondering if she- if they should get into bed like they both so desperately want to. Gabriel certainly hadn’t been shy about cuddling in bed before, but somehow it seems different now, like a wall has come between them, or between Gabriel and the rest of the world.
But Nathan can’t leave him either. So before he can second guess himself, he grabs a spare pillow and lies down on the floor right beside the bed. After a moment he hears Annalise do the same on the other side.