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Five conversations at the Avengers Tower...and one that didn't happen.

Summary:

The Scoobies talk to members of SHIELD and the Avengers.

Notes:

Story Notes: Set post-Chosen but pre-AAoU.

Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all associated characters are property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy Productions, United Paramount Network, and Fox Television. The Avengers belong to Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, and Marvel Comics. This work is not for profit, and no ownership of aforementioned copyrighted material implied, nor any infringement intended.

Work Text:

1. Bruce and Oz

The physicist looked across at the man with dyed-blue hair and matching nail polish. “The secret is, I’m always angry.”

”Yeah, that’s what my ex-girlfriend said,” replied the smaller man while he absently caressed his Tibetan prayer beads.

Banner frowned. “Excuse me?”

“There’s no way she would have let me come here, alone with you if she hadn’t done some serious research.”

“Really.”

Oz nodded. “She said you have anger in you aura, but it was so tightly controlled it was unbelievable. She said you were a kindred spirit.”

Banner laughed. “To you?”

“No, to her. She’s been known to go on rampages and destroy buildings, too.”

“Huh,” said Banner, intrigued.

“Yeah.”

“So why did you want to talk to me?”

Oz’s fingers sought the prayer beads again. “I think you could actually use some work on your inner peace.”

“And what would you know about that,” Banner snarked. His smug grin disappeared as Oz’s eyes changed color just the tiniest bit.

“More than you’d guess,” Oz said, willing his eyes to return to normal.

* * *

2. Tony and Willow

Two of the brightest people in the world stared at the flatscreen monitor showing Bruce and Oz as they spoke. The speaker volume had been muted by the redhead before the conversation started.

“Can you read lips,” Tony Stark asked.

“No.”

“Then why’d you specify no sound, no recording.”

“I want them to be able to talk freely.”

“Without getting angry, you mean.”

Willow looked from the screen to Tony. “We’re not scared of Banner. Or his rage. And we’re pretty hard to kill, ourselves.”

Stark looked at the young woman with a completely different expression. “Yeah, I know the feeling. What exactly does your organization do, again?”

“You’ve read our prospectus, searched all the publicly available data, and tried to hack us four times. And you still don’t know?”

Stark gave a little grin. “So, are you--still--not interested in a job?

Willow’s jaw dropped. “Excuse me?”

“You are W.A. Rosenberg, Sunnydale High School alumnus?”

“Yes.”

“Well, you and your little buddy in there did blow off my recruiter ten years ago. Wish you chosen differently?”

Willow’s eyes flashed. “We were fighting the good fight then, and we’re still doing it now. So far, we’re still ahead. And I don’t ever ‘wish’ anything at all.”

“Wait, you don’t mean actually fighting when you were a high school student?”

“Didn’t your recruiter come back with reports of a foiled school shooting, where students took down a gunman posing as a police officer?”

“Well, yeah. But on the news they said it was just an accidental discharge from the police officer’s gun.”

“And you believed the news? Mr. Stark, I’m shocked!”

“You’re feisty. Too bad I’m happily married.”

* * *

3. Nick and Rupert

Rupert Giles sipped his tea as he stared across the table at the director of SHIELD. “So, you want us to work for you?”

“That’s the general idea.”

“You couldn’t afford us,” Giles replied.

“The last person that told me that was the richest man in the world, who is now actually on my team.”

“Price, as we use the term, never has anything to do with money. I mean that your group couldn’t afford to have the negative publicity of having innocent young women slaughtered in the course of achieving your goals.”

Fury raised the eyebrow over his remaining eye. “Your organization seems to manage it.”

“We’ve been dealing with it since long before you colonials were a bunch of religious refugees and illiterate savages. And even so, it has been a challenge with the current state of the game.”

The black man leaned forward and stared intently with his lone eye. “My bosses want access.”

“And they most assuredly will not get it. Even if it means blood in the streets, I will not hand over my charges to the bumbling bureaucracy and shortsighted politicians in your government.”

“So you would rather risk hostilities with SHIELD and the United States government than surrender access to your operatives,” Fury asked incredulously.

“Quite.”

“Outstanding.” Fury slammed shut the file. “I will report to my superiors that the old agreements remain in effect, and the Watcher’s Council-”

Giles coughed discretely.

“Sorry, International Council of Slayers and Watchers, will retain both oversight of the Slayers and first response privileges in all cases regarding the supernatural in the United States, its territories, and possessions.”

Giles looked at his counterpart speculatively. “You gave in rather easily.”

“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t some toady who’d try to sell out his own to get a bigger piece of the pie.”

“Or a closet misogynist who sees the Slayers as tools, not people.”

“That, too. I did meet two of your predecessors, after all.”

Giles gave a small smile and rose to his feet. “Thank you for your time, director.”

“And you, Sir Rupert, for yours.” Giles had his hand on the doorknob when Fury added, “Give Slayer Prime my regards.”

Giles sighed and looked back over his shoulder. “She does so hate that title.”

Fury smiled. “I know.”

* * *

4. Natasha and Faith

“So, are you here to do a psychological evaluation of me,” Faith asked.

The slim redhead crossed her legs. “No, that was Mr. Stark’s idea of a joke.”

“Yeah, you seem more of a fuck ‘em senseless and poison them with ricin kind of gal.”

Natasha got very, very still. “Excuse me?”

“But Willow said that’s in the past, right? Now it’s a brave new world out there and your file says you’re fighting the good fight, like us.”

“You’ve seen my file?”

“Well, I saw translated copy of your Russian file, and a copy of your SHIELD one.”

“The director gave you access to my files?”

“Oh, hell no! Willow magicked them out of wherever you guys had them, and put ‘em back when we were done.”

“So you’ve read what I’ve done.”

“Yeah. Giles says we’re kindred spirits.” Faith even used air quotes.

Natasha frowned. “But your file just says-“

“-what Willow altered it to say,” Faith interrupted. “Just like you, I’ve done a lot of bad stuff. And just like you, I have things to atone for. You guys faced off against a god and an alien invasion. So we know you’re the good guys, but we’d be suckers if we didn’t get all the info on you we could.”

“So our meeting was actually your chance to sound me out, face to face. Like all the other meetings, I presume.”

The Slayer nodded. “I was asked to meet you and see if you would be willing to cross-train with some of our people.”

“I don’t play well with others.”

“We can handle ourselves in the ring.” Faith twitched in surprise as the Black Widow broke into honest laughter.

 

* * *

5. Maria and Xander

Agent Hill strode into the conference room flipping through a file. “Mr. Harris, I apologize for the delay, there was...”

Hill trailed off when she looked up and Xander smiled.

“You have GOT to be kidding me,” she said.

“I know, I know. They’re going to think I’m fanboying Fury, or something.”

“Sir Rupert said something about an alternate liaison?”

“Trust me, you DON’T want Andrew wandering around anywhere you guys have anything sensitive, or dangerous, or both.”

“Mr. Harris, I’m sure your organization holds you in high regard, but upon examining your qualifications, I’m not quite sure you have the necessary background to participate in some of the more...esoteric discussions that will crop up from time to time.”

Xander smiled. “I was afraid you would say something like that. Willow sent along a list of my greatest hits from the Council’s records.” He slip a manila envelope across the table.

Hill opened the envelope and began skimming the contents. “This is NOT from your official file. You were involved in explosive demolition of your high school?”

Xander nodded.

“And the destruction of the true demon Olvikan?”

“It was a two-for-one,” Xander said.

“And the Hellgod Glorificus.”

“Hey, I’m just a glorified bricklayer who cleans up after a bunch of girls.”

Hill looked up, with a level of respect in her eyes that Xander had rarely gotten from anyone. “Perhaps you’re exactly the man for the job.”

“Yeah, I really wouldn’t want you guys to have to deal with Andrew.”

* * *

6. Pepper and Andrew

“Really, Ms. Potts. I’m quite certain that once you explain to Tony—I mean, Mr. Stark—the benefits to merchandising the entire Avengers franchise he will completely agree with me. If you consider clothing, toys, and video games, the potential earnings for Avengers-themed products is limitless.

“Andrew, please don’t take this the wrong way, but Mr. Stark is really more interested in the benefits of clean energy than profiting from toys-” Pepper knew she’d said the wrong thing the moment the word left her lips.

“TOYS? We’re talking about action figures! We could have different scale figures: micro, for small dioramas, key rings, and pendants; medium posable 12” with different ensembles to buy as options; and then the large plush line would be aimed at the 2 to 4 year old market...”

 

FIN