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Kara thinks that she likes California. It’s hard to say. She likes the sand—it’s soft, and strange, and it coats her feet when she walks on it but it’s also new. There are no sad memories with the sand. She likes the water, although the oceans are all wrong because they separate the continents which are also wrong.
The climate is nice, maybe. It’s hard to say. She knows the breezes are welcome and that the air is warm but not hot. She knows these things because people tell her; Kara can’t feel the breeze, not really, and temperature means nothing to her on this planet. She can’t be cold or hot. Kara can only be the temperature that she is.
Kara does not care for California’s most famous feature. She does not like the bright yellow sun and the beautiful blue sky.
It should not be yellow and blue. It should be red and orange and pink—those are the colors that a sun and sky should be, Kara knows. Those are the colors of home.
Home is gone. Home is California, now, with its yellow sun and its blue sky and its ocean that lives between continents that are the wrong shape and size. This ocean will not boil Kara if she touches it because she can’t be boiled on Earth, but also because the humans haven’t killed their planet like Kara’s people had. Not yet; they're working on it, though.
We’re working on it, Kara corrects. She is to be a human now. That’s what Eliza says.
Kara has lived with the Danvers for over three years now. She loves the Danvers as much as she can love anyone on this planet. Eliza and Jeremiah were so kind to her and so patient with her; kinder and more patient than the House of El would have been in reverse, which shames Kara. Her people looked down on this planet—primitive, they called it. And yet Earth was still here, and Krypton wasn’t. And Earth had welcomed Kara, cradled her weeping, mourning body in its arms. Kara is surviving here, even if she isn’t living yet. She thinks she will live again someday.
Kara tries not to think about what would have happened if Earth had been lost, and if Alex had somehow made her way to Krypton. The brilliant, righteous Kryptonians—a race greater than all others. A proud species with a long history. They had plotted their own galaxy a millennium before the Humans invented the wheel. The noble House of El was older than any language that has ever been spoken on Earth.
And they would have cast Alex, Kara’s new sister, right back into space because she was not one of them.
Kara has lived as a Human for over three years now, and she still barely understands why the Danvers chose to help her. Eliza says it was because it’s the right thing to do. Jeremiah said it was because they could not turn away someone in need—a hurting, grieving girl had needed a family, and they had given her one. Alex had said that she didn’t understand either and that Kara should go back to Krypton, but later she said she didn’t mind Kara so much as long as she stopped stealing her shirts and eating her snacks. Now, Alex calls Kara sister and best friend, and she knows more of Kara’s history and planet and people than any other Human.
Kal-El says that to be Human is to choose to do good or to do bad, and that the Danvers are good people who choose to do good. Kara thinks that Kryptonian Good and Human Good are different, but nobody except for Alex understands.
Kara has told Alex that she was sorry that her family would have rocketed her back into space, condemning her to a cold and lonely death among the stars. Alex said it was alright, but that Kara should let her have the last slice of pizza. Kara does not understand this Human atonement ritual, but now she always sets aside a slice for Alex—even when she eats alone.
Kara graduated from Midvale High School a month ago. In August, she will attend National City University. She does not know what degree she will pursue.
Now, in her last summer before college—a time that Kara understands is considered to be culturally important to Humans—Kara has decided to explore more of California. She is driving down the coast in a rented car, like Humans do. Kara could fly from the top of California to the bottom in seconds, but Alex said that wasn’t the purpose of a vacation. Kara is supposed to take her time and relax. She is supposed to find herself.
Kara does not know how to find herself, but she has found that she doesn't mind looking. Alex was right. Her adventure has been relaxing. Kara likes the smaller towns, because they are quiet and peaceful. Kara does not like the cities, even though she will be living in National City to attend university. Kara will adjust.
She is in a small town now. Or a small city—Sunnydale is strange, Kara thinks. She does not understand Human city development, but something is wrong with this one. Or maybe not; Kara does not comment on the strangeness, because what does she know about Human towns? Maybe this is somewhat normal. Just a different kind of city.
Kara is enjoying her iced coffee and walking down one of Sunnydale’s roads when she smells something unique. Sol has strengthened Kara’s olfactory senses as well, and she thinks it may be the worst part of living on Earth. But Kara has adjusted, and after years of living on this planet Kara’s nose mostly filters out the unpleasantness.
These smells are like nothing that Kara has smelled before. They are strange, like a spice rack, but not. Kara follows them. They lead her to a small store in an old strip mall, the words “Magic Box” written above it in whimsical letters.
The smells are stronger inside. They belong to woods and herbs and spices and waxes and other things that Kara does not know. The shop itself is interesting—it sells things that Kara does not understand.
What is magic? A boy at Midvale High School had once shown Kara a card trick, but her eyes were too sharp and she caught the sleight-of-hand.
Kara also watched Harry Potter with Alex, but Alex assured her that wizards and witches did not exist. Kara had reminded her that she could fly without a broom and shoot energy from her eyes without a wand, so maybe there were wizards that Alex didn’t know about, but her sister had huffed and then next week they watched Titanic instead. Nobody got to be happy now, Alex said, because Kara had ruined it last time.
Kara inspects a shelf full of crystals. Crystals were important, on Krypton. They stored information and powered most things. Krypton’s Crystal Engineers were renowned throughout the galaxy for the feats they could accomplish. Kara might have worked as a Crystal Engineer, had her planet not exploded. What do Humans do with crystals?
“Excuse me,” a voice says. It is the store clerk, Kara thinks. She stands behind the counter. Her hair is blonde, like Kara’s—there are many blondes in California.
“Excuse me,” the voice says again, “Are you going to purchase something, or are you just staring at my merchandise? This is a store, you know!”
“I’m sorry,” Kara says, “I was just admiring your crystals. I do know this is a store—I understand that it is customary to exchange money for goods and services.”
“And you have money?”
“I do.”
“Excellent! I love money!”
Kara considers this. Does she love money?
“I don’t have strong feelings for money,” Kara decides, “but I do like food, and money is used to purchase food. So maybe I do love money?”
The woman brightens and emerges from behind her counter. She approaches Kara, her hair bouncing as she walks. It is an interesting cut.
“I like food too! There are so many kinds of Human foods.”
“There are!” Kara laughs, “I think it’s because there are so many of them. Of us. We’re very plentiful.”
“That’s true. Can you believe the size of our population? Sometimes I think there are too many Humans.”
“I think that too!”
This is the easiest conversation that Kara has ever had with a Human that is not Eliza, Alex, or Kenny.
“I am Kara Danvers,” Kara says, “It’s nice to meet you!”
“I am Anya Jenkins,” Anya says, “And it is nice to meet you too!”
“Can you explain these crystals to me? I have observed them, but it seems that they are just rocks.”
Anya looks at the rocks Kara is inspecting. She picks one up, turns it in her hand, and then replaces it.
“That is true,” Anya says, “they are mostly just rocks. Some help with certain forms of meditation, and there are rituals that can be performed with others, but many are just rocks. I’m told they are pretty rocks, and Humans will pay me to buy pretty rocks and keep them in their home.”
“That seems strange,” Kara says.
“I agree!”
“I think I will give you money in exchange for one of these rocks for my sister. Which is the prettiest?”
Anya is excited to give Kara a rock and to receive some of Kara’s money. Her cheer is contagious, and together they select a medium-sized orange crystal. Anya assures Kara that it does nothing at all and serves no purpose—just the kind of thing that Humans like.
Kara rejects a bag when it is offered. She can carry a single crystal alone—there is no need to accumulate extra waste.
“Goodbye, Anya,” Kara says before she leaves. “You are very wise. I think more Humans should be like you.”
“Goodbye Kara! I think the same of you,” Anya says. She waves, and Kara waves back. Kara leaves.
*****
Kara is walking alone after dark, which Eliza has told her is usually inadvisable for Human women to do. Kara is significantly more durable than Human women, so she walks alone anyway. Hopefully anyone who sees her will think she is just a strange woman and not an alien one.
She enjoys the moonlight, although Earth has only one moon. Kara wonders if Luna is lonely up there, with no partner. Kara, too, hung in space all alone.
Sunnydale may be a strange city, but it is a pleasant one. The streets remind her of the movies that she watched with Alex to learn more about how Humans live. It is pretty, in a Human way.
Kara decides to return to her motel. She will leave in the morning, or maybe she will spend another day exploring Sunnydale and leave the day after. She has heard that there is a zoo; maybe she will visit the animals.
There is a cemetery between Kara and her hotel. She skirts around it, out of respect. She thinks it is strange to bury the dead rather than burn them, but apparently it is another Human custom. They value their bodies as pieces of themselves rather than as vessels for the energy inside.
If Kara can die under Sol, she hopes the Danvers will find a way to burn her body. She does not want to be buried.
A man emerges from the cemetery, stepping in front of Kara. He is a strange Human, with an unusual face and yellow eyes. She didn’t know that Humans came like this.
“Evening, lady,” the man says.
“Hello,” Kara responds, “Good evening to you. Are you enjoying your night?”
Kara has learned to ask questions when she can. If she asks Humans about themselves, they often won’t ask questions about Kara. She is not always good at answering questions like a Human would.
“Not so much,” the man admits. “I’m starving. ”
Kara understands that he is hyperbolizing and she empathizes. She, too, often feels starving. In order to work properly under Sol, her body needs many more calories than the average Human. Hunger is unpleasant.
“I’m sorry to hear that—”
The man interrupts Kara by trying to bite her. His teeth—longer than Human standard—scrape harmlessly against her neck. Saliva wets her throat and shirt collar. It is unpleasant and strange.
This would never happen on Krypton.
Even on Earth, Kara is nearly certain that this is not how people are supposed to behave. Kara removes the man from her neck and holds him firmly at arm’s length.
“That was very rude,” Kara decides. “Please don’t touch me without my permission. In fact, you should ask for consent before you touch anybody—barring emergencies, of course.”
“What?” the strange Human asks. He looks bewildered. Kara feels a moment of pity—maybe no one has explained these things to him. She was lucky to have the Danvers to teach her about Human etiquette.
“You should always ask for permission before you touch people,” Kara explains. “Unless it’s an emergency—if you need to perform CPR, for example, it is okay to go ahead and do that without asking.”
Alex was a lifeguard one summer, and she told Kara about it. Kara is not supposed to perform CPR—there is a risk that she might push her hands directly through somebody while performing compressions, or that she might accidentally breathe too much air into somebody and explode their lungs. Alex thought that these risks were very funny, but Kara does not want to explode anybody’s lungs.
The man tries to bite Kara again. She removes him, again. He is a slow learner.
“I will explain again—” Kara starts.
This time she is interrupted by a small blonde Human landing a flying kick into the man’s head. He goes soaring through the air and crashes into a wall.
“Are you okay?” the woman asks.
“I’m okay,” Kara says, “He tried to bite me, twice. I was explaining that he shouldn’t do that.”
The woman looks at her strangely.
“You should get out of here, lady.”
“But this is very interesting!” Kara says, and it’s true. She has just met a new type of Human.
Any retort the woman plans on offering is cut off when the man rises from the ground and tackles her. They roll around for a bit, separate, and then hop to their feet.
“Slayer,” the man growls.
“Slayee,” the woman responds.
“You’re a much better meal anyway,” the man says, and then they fight.
Kara considers intervening, because she does not usually like violence and because she knows she has the strength to separate them, but they seem to know each other. Maybe this is a Human ritual. Are they courting? Some of the stories that she watched with Alex suggest that violent, martial Humans are a good match for each other.
It is not a long fight. They both seem more capable than the average Human, but the blonde woman is clearly superior. She withdraws a pointed wooden stick from her jacket and pushes it into the man’s chest. He dissolves into dust.
The woman kneels on the ground for a moment, panting, before she pushes herself to her feet.
“I didn’t know Humans could do that,” Kara says, which is true. She had assumed that Humans left bodies when they died. After all—what were the graves for? Then again, Kara had never seen Jeremiah’s body. She thought it was because he died in a jungle and his corpse could not be recovered. Maybe not—maybe he was dust too.
But Kenny. She had seen Kenny’s body, at his funeral. Kenny was buried now.
Maybe the man was not dead. A wooden stick through the heart would kill most sentients that have hearts, but there was no corpse. Did he teleport? Turn incorporeal? Humans weren’t supposed to be able to do that either.
The woman jumps at Kara’s voice, clearly surprised.
“You’re still here?” she asks, her voice going high at the end.
“Yes.”
“And—you… You just saw me— that guy? You said he tried to bite you?”
“He did,” Kara confirms, “I’m learning a lot tonight.”
The woman’s nose scrunches up. She looks confused. She looks around helplessly and returns the stick to pocket.
“I’m sorry,” the woman says, “I’m just—normally people run away by now?”
“Are Humans supposed to run?” Kara asks, before she remembers that she’s not supposed to ask strangers questions about Humans.
She had gotten much better during her time at Midvale High School, but Kara has been alone for most of her vacation and she has fallen back into bad habits. Eliza will be disappointed. Alex will be angry, but Kara knows now that her anger comes from worry.
The woman’s eyes narrow. Her hand reaches into the pocket that she keeps her stick in.
“What are you?” she asks.
Kara laughs nervously. She knows that What is not Who. She answers Who anyway.
“I am Kara Danvers!” she says cheerfully. It is good to be friendly—Humans are not scared of friendly people. They might be scared of aliens. Kara is not a good Human, but she does not want to scare people.
Kara extends her hand, because that is what Humans do, and a moment later she remembers that she is not supposed to shake hands. She has practiced a lot, but she always shakes just a little too hard. Alex had to wear a bandage on her elbow after the first time she taught Kara to shake hands. She said it was from a soccer injury, but Kara thinks she was lying.
“I’m Buffy,” Buffy says, and they shake hands. Buffy does not wince from Kara’s handshake. Kara must have done well.
“It was nice to meet you, Buffy,” Kara says, “but I have to go. It’s late, and I need to sleep for seven or eight hours before I can wake again. I’m going to see the animals tomorrow.”
Buffy looks bewildered. Kara thinks she might just be a permanently confused person, considering she kicked the yellow-eyed man without introducing herself, turned him into dust, and has seemed puzzled by Kara ever since.
“I mean the zoo,” Kara explains, in case that helps Buffy to understand.
“No, I got that part. I think.”
“Good,” Kara says, “But I really do have to go! Goodbye, Buffy—get home safe!”
“Wait—” Buffy says, but Kara is already gone.
*****
“Anya Jenkins!” Kara calls as she lets herself into the Magic Box.
“Kara Danvers!” Anya calls back. A cheerful smile lights up her face. Kara returns it.
There are two other Humans in the shop; a dark haired young man who Kara estimates to be about Anya’s age, and an older man with glasses. Kara is not always good at guessing Human ages but she suspects that were they on Krypton, he would be nearing his year of meditation.
“Have you returned to give me more money in exchange for goods?”
”Anya—” the young man starts, but Kara speaks over him.
“I have not; I am satisfied with my purchase from yesterday. I came to see you!”
“Oh. Hello!”
“Hello!”
“What is happening right now?” the young man asks. Kara turns to him.
“I am Kara Danvers. Yesterday I purchased a useless crystal from Anya.”
“That’s right,” Anya says, “We determined that it was pretty, though.”
“Okay,” the young man says, “I understand. Actually, no, I don’t. I’m very confused. But I’m glad to see that Anya’s making friends.”
“Are we friends, Anya?” Kara asks, “I don’t have very much experience with friendship rituals.”
Anya inspects Kara consideringly. Kara holds out her arms to her sides in case that helps her inspection.
“Hmm. I think maybe we can be. I would like to be your friend, Kara.”
“Wonderful!” Kara says. She turns to the young man, “Yes, Anya and I are friends.”
“If you say so,” the older man says. He sounds skeptical; Kara does not know why.
“Well, I’m Xander Harris. Any friend of Anya is a friend of mine. And this is Giles.”
Xander offers Kara a hand. She shakes it, feeling confident after her exchange with Buffy the night before. Apparently she miscalculates—Xander hisses out a breath and snatches his hand back, examining his fingers.
“Ow! You’ve, uh, got a strong grip there, Kara.”
“Sorry! As you say, my grip is strong. I apologize for any broken fingers.”
“Broken? Nothing’s broken,” Xander says, laughing nervously. “Was that a possibility? Has that happened, in the past?”
“Not recently.”
Xander puts both his hands behind his back. Giles, who had been extending his hand to Kara, takes it back and removes his glasses instead. He cleans them with a cloth.
“Are you, uh, from around here?” Xander asks.
“I am from Midvale, California,” Kara says, “I have recently graduated from Midvale High School, and in the fall I will attend university. For the time being, I am vacationing along California’s coast. I am trying to find myself.”
“That’s, er, excellent, Kara. Many people go on journeys before they begin college. Why, I myself—”
“And were you born in Midvale?” Xander asks, interrupting Giles.
“I was born on September 22nd in a Scandinavian country,” Kara says, using the backstory Eliza has prepared for her. “I moved to Midvale three years ago when my entire family and all official records were lost in a tragic, unspecific accident.”
Giles clears his throat and cleans his glasses more vigorously. Xander opens and closes his mouth.
“I was born on the Fourth of July,” Anya says helpfully, “And don’t think I haven’t heard all the jokes—’our little patriot,’ my parents would call me, when I was younger and therefore smaller and shorter than I am now.”
“I was also smaller when I was young! We have so much in common. You are a good friend, Anya.”
“Thank you!”
Kara is getting much better at being a Human, she decides. She has made one Human friend and potentially two more. This has been a good vacation—she will tell Alex that. Maybe Kara has found herself. She has found Human Kara.
Giles appears satisfied with his glasses. He puts them back on.
“So, the Californian coast? I imagine you’ll be visiting Los Angeles next.”
“Oh, no. I just came from Los Angeles. I’m on my way back to Midvale, now.”
“Well then. How did you enjoy it?”
“It was… big,” Kara says, which is true for Earth cities.
Los Angeles was not impressive. Kara thinks Los Angeles is dirty and loud, and she does not like that there are homeless people. Everybody had a home on Krypton.
Three years ago, Kara would have said that was because Krypton was better than Earth. More sophisticated than the primitive Humans who leave their neighbors wallowing in the mud while they stay in their petty mansions.
Now, Kara wonders if there were no homeless people on Krypton because there were no extra people on Krypton. Only a specific number of children were created each year, and each child was designed to fill a specific role. More important families, like the noble House of El, were able to ‘skip the line,’ as Alex would say. Kara was built to be a mathematician so that she could replace her aging grandfather, who was also a mathematician.
If Kara had reached the age of maturity on Krypton, she would have been inducted into the Science Guild. She would take her father’s seat, and Zor-El would take his father’s seat. Grandfather, released from his duties, would spend one Kryptonian year without purpose. A year for meditation. And then he would return to Rao’s light, his purpose fulfilled.
Kara thinks this sounds peaceful. It is the way of things. And it was kinder, on Krypton, because there was a place for everybody. Kara mourns that she will never take her father’s seat, and then her grandfather’s seat. She will never guide her parents through their year of meditation. She will never sing for them as their body burns in the Hearth of Argo City, guiding their energy back to Rao.
Kara sang for them when she landed on Earth. She sang for all of Krypton, for every single name she could remember and for the billions of names that she couldn’t. She believes that she was not too late, and that their energy has been returned now. They are with Rao.
There will be no one to sing for Kara. She is probably too far from Rao anyway; her energy will never make it. Will she go to Sol?
Kara doesn’t know. Sol is young, and his people have already forgotten him. Kara feels for Sol—he is a star without a people, and she is a person without a star. There is a kinship there.
She will live a long time under Sol. Kara thinks that when she learns to live again—to really live, not just survive—she will get to know Sol better. They can be alone together.
The Danvers had not understood when Kara explained how she would have taken her father and then her grandfather's seat. They did not understand the year of meditation, or the return of one's energy to Rao. Kara had not tried to explain it more than twice.
“Los Angeles is a big city,” Giles agrees.
“That’s what I said,” Kara says.
“Well, yes.”
There’s a moment of silence. Kara thinks that it is probably awkward silence, but she does not know how to fill it. And then she remembers why she came to visit her new friend today.
“Anya!” Kara says, “I came here today to ask about Sunnydale. You have a very unique city, you know?”
Xander laughs nervously again and Giles sputters.
“What do you mean?” Anya asks. “Sunnydale is a perfectly normal city full of perfectly normal Humans.”
Kara considers this. She thinks that is not true, but she does not know what is normal for Human cities. She decides to inquire further.
“Last night I met a new type of Human that I haven’t seen in other cities. His face was strange, and he had yellow eyes. Is this not unique to Sunnydale?”
Anya’s eyes widen. Giles sputters further.
"You met a—what? Huh?" Xander asks.
"He was very rude. He tried to bite me," Kara says.
"You seem unbitten."
"I removed him."
"You… removed him?" Giles asks. His glasses come off again.
Kara does not have a lot of Human experience, but she is not dumb. She has made an error of some kind. She makes a show of checking the time.
"Look at the time!" Kara says. "I was supposed to go to the zoo today. I want to visit the animals."
"But—" Xander says.
"Anya, may we exchange numbers so we can contact each other as friends do?"
"Yes—let's! I look forward to having a friend who appreciates me for more than the orgasms that I can offer them."
Kara doesn't fully understand what Anya means, but she is willing to give her friend the benefit of the doubt. Surely Kara herself sometimes says strange things that her friend ignores.
"Don't worry Anya—I think our relationship can remain orgasm-free."
"This is a strange morning," Xander says. "Giles, this is real, right? I'm not dreaming, or hallucinating? We're actually here."
"I was wondering that myself," Giles says.
"Goodbye Xander," Kara says, "It was nice to meet you. And goodbye Giles—you are old, and I'm sure you have much wisdom to offer. I hope you find peace during your year of meditation."
"Thank you?"
"Xander, Anya, you should take advantage of Giles' wisdom while you can. He will surely die soon, to make room for a newer, younger Human."
"Oh."
"Ouch. Harsh, G-man. Don't worry—we, uh, appreciate you."
"Goodbye!" Kara says again, and she leaves.
The zoo is smaller than the ones that Kara has seen in Metropolis, National City, and Los Angeles. She still enjoys it, though. Kara likes all of Earth's animals. They are strange and fascinating, and beautiful in their own way. Krypton did not have many animals left when Kara was born.
*****
Kara calls Anya and asks to meet for lunch so they can talk more about Sunnydale. Kara likes lunch because it is a mealtime, and Kara likes food. She also understands that lunch is when friends meet, so it is a perfect time to have a conversation with Anya.
This time, Xander and Giles will not be present. They will not interrupt; Kara can learn all about this strange city and its special Humans.
They meet at an outdoor cafe, which might be pleasant. This is a human experience that Kara has not yet had. Midvale is small, and does not have cafes like this.
Anya sits across from Kara, a wide smile on her face. She orders a coffee and a salad. Kara orders three sandwiches but requests all of the ingredients on a single bun. Anya does not comment, which endears her to Kara even further. Many Humans have mocked Kara’s appetite.
“Kara!” Anya greets once they are seated and waiting for their meals. “I have a blunt and potentially invasive question for you.”
“Those are my favorite kind,” Kara says honestly, because Human social customs still escape her sometimes. She has watched a lot of television with Alex in order to study Earth culture, but she still struggles with determining what to say and what not to say.
“Great! Are you Human?”
A chunk of their cast iron table comes off in Kara’s hand. She laughs nervously and throws it behind her. She is facing East, so the piece probably lands in the Pacific ocean.
Anya’s eyes follow the piece of metal and then come to rest on the obliterated section of their table.
“Human? Of course I’m Human! What else is there, haha? We’re all Humans here!”
Anya takes a sip of her coffee.
“I was born in a Scandinavian country, as I mentioned at your shop. That is why I am strange. And any unusual strength you may witness comes from felling trees, which the women of my family have done for many generations!”
“I was also born in Europe,” Anya reveals. “Over 1100 years ago, in fact.”
Kara frowns. She did not know that Humans could live that long. She leans forward, inspecting Anya.
“You look very young for your age,” she says.
“Thank you! But I’m telling you this because I was not always Human. I was—”
“Are you an alien, like me?” Kara asks.
“—a demon,” Anya finishes at the same time.
They stare at each other for a moment.
“That was a silly question,” Kara admits. “Aliens aren’t born in Europe."
“Aliens are real?”
“What is a demon?”