Chapter Text
It was their first stop after Wano, and Sanji was nervous. He wouldn’t even deny it, if he was asked - it would be a lie to deny it, and Sanji had been trying so very hard to stop lying to his crew about this shit.
It had occurred to him at some point after they had left Wano Kuni that the Vinsmokes must have passed through nearby waters, since Whole Cake Island had been so close. And Sanji knew, firsthand, just what that would have meant for any local populations. The Vinsmokes were brutal, relentless - evil. They would have ravaged any village they came across for no other reason than that they could.
Which was why, when the Strawhats docked at the first island they spotted after leaving Wano, Sanji was so nervous he almost considered staying on the ship while the rest of the crew explored the town. Everyone was going, which was a rarity that Sanji wished he could enjoy - typically at least one of the crew would stay behind to watch over Sunny, but the waters had been so quiet, and it had been so long since the whole crew had managed to relax together as a family, that they decided to risk it this time.
Sanji didn’t want to be the one to kill the almost palpable giddiness everyone was feeling. It was only the rapidly dwindling food stores - as well as the almost certain knowledge that Luffy would never have let him stay behind even if he’d tried - that convinced him to allow his captain to seize his hand and drag him from Sunny with a bright laugh and just a tad more force than was necessary. That kind of action that would typically have been reserved for Usopp, but since Whole Cake Island Luffy had been exceedingly generous in his affections for Sanji, and the cook just couldn’t bring himself to complain. Not that he really wanted to.
“Do you think they’ll have meat?” was, naturally, the first thing Luffy asked him after Sanji finally managed to wrangle his arm back out of the rubber grip in favour of slinging it around his captain’s shoulders. Sanji rolled his eyes fondly, and smiled around the uneasiness in his chest that he had been trying to dispel since Chopper had first spotted land on the horizon.
“Yes, captain,” he said, fondness warming his voice, “I’m sure they’ll have plenty of meat for you to gorge yourself on - just remember to pay them.” Luffy pouted.
“I always pay them,” he whined petulantly, then, before Sanji could protest this blatant lie, added, “and anyway, even when I don’t - we’re pirates, baka, we’re supposed to steal.” Sanji smothered a grin at the logic.
“I thought being a pirate was about being free, not being a criminal,” he said in a mock serious tone, watching Luffy’s face from the corner of his eye as it twisted up in contemplation. His captain hummed thoughtfully.
“Well, I guess you’re right,” the younger man acquiesced. “I still think being free should mean sometimes not having to pay for food, though.” Sanji heard Usopp and Zoro snort behind them, and barked a laugh himself, before pulling Luffy into a noogie. Luffy’s surprised yelp quickly morphed into a shriek of laughter.
“I won’t argue with that,” Sanji said around his own grin, “just as long as you’re not leaving anyone else hungry.”
“Maybe you guys could, like, not broadcast your intentions to steal food as we walk into the town you’re planning to target?” came the beautiful and melodic and glorious voice of their navigator. She sounded harried, but when Sanji turned around to apologise, he found her watching their shenanigans with a warm smile, swinging her and Robin’s joined hands. Sanji grinned at her, and she shook her head fondly.
“We’ll be on our best behaviour, Nami-san,” he promised, sending her a mock salute as Luffy finally managed to straighten up, his hair now even more mussed than usual. “I promise.”
“Oh, no,” Nami replied immediately, her smile twisting into a wicked - though no less beautiful - grin. “Please, by all means, get as much free shit as possible. Just don’t get caught, yeah?” Everyone chuckled, and Sanji surrendered his hold on the captain to the eager arms of Usopp and Chopper.
He smiled as Luffy bent down to scoop the little reindeer up and settle him on his shoulder like a sack of flour, though the smile quickly faded as they rounded a bend in the dirt path they were following and came upon the entrance to the local town. Sanji immediately noted the rubble surrounding the gate, and the smell of fresh paint that grew stronger with every step they took, and the eerie quietness of what should be a decent sized community. Brook, who had been keeping up a gentle melody at the back of the group since they had left Sunny, let his voice taper off into silence. Sanji forced himself not to turn back.
As the group entered the town, Sanji watched Luffy grab Usopp’s arm and drag him bodily towards the first stall they came across, Chopper hanging on to the rubber man’s neck for dear life. They oohed and aahed over the shining velvets and glimmering silks the fabric merchant eagerly began peddling to them.
Sanji smiled, but his contentment quickly faded as he scanned the rest of the street they were standing in. The place was barely hanging on, he could tell. The majority of the buildings were surrounded by ramshackle scaffolding, and most of the stalls were scantily stocked. He could neither see nor smell any of the meat he had promised Luffy, and the fruit and vegetables he could see from where he stood were rotting. He sighed - he had been hoping to stock enough food here to last them a couple of months, at least, but from the looks of things, he’d be lucky if he managed to find them enough to last through to the end of this week. And that was assuming he was able to get anything at all.
Because he could tell, from the looks he was receiving alone, that his assumptions about the Vinsmokes had been right. The buildings weren’t the only things that had seen better days - a lot of the people he saw were sporting bandages or wearing casts or walking with makeshift crutches, and he could see some wary glances being sent his way. He clenched his fist, and swallowed back his anxiety, and tried to figure out the best way to beat a hasty retreat while still allowing everyone else to have whatever fun they could possibly find here.
“Everything okay, Sanji?” Sanji turned to see Robin watching him, a thoughtful look on her face. Sanji tried to smile for her.
“Ah, yes, of course,” he said, with a small laugh that he hoped was convincing. “Just, ah-” he cast another glance at the people around them, and lowered his voice. “I don’t know that I’ll be very welcome here, if my suspicions are correct.” A small crease appeared between Robin’s brows at this, and Nami’s eyes flashed to him from where they’d been directed toward their wayward captain, making sure he wasn’t getting swindled like he usually did.
“What?” She asked, in a sharp voice, and Sanji tried not to wince at its volume. “What do you mean? We’ve barely been here two minutes, what makes you think they have a problem with us?” Sanji shook his head and reached into his breast pocket for a cigarette. He was down to his last pack - whether or not they managed to procure any food at all on this trip, Sanji vowed to himself not to leave this island without at least one more pack. He’d even take some loose tobacco - he wasn’t the best at rolling his own cigarettes, but he’d make do.
“Not ‘us’, per se, Nami-san,” he said around his first puff of smoke. He looked around, more and more sure of his suspicions as he saw children being ushered back indoors and stalls being hastily cleared. “I, ah, get the feeling the Vinsmokes may have passed this way recently.” Nami’s face changed immediately, and though none of the Wano team knew the specifics of what happened on Whole Cake Island yet, Sanji guessed that at least a brief rundown had been shared with them at some point, as Robin’s expression also darkened, and Zoro’s hands came to rest upon his katana.
“Wait, what’s happening?” Franky stepped forward, noticing the sudden tension and thankfully keeping his voice low. “We lookin’ at a fight?” Sanji shook his head quickly before that thought could escalate any further.
“Absolutely not,” he said, steel in his voice. “If these people really were attacked by Germa then the last thing I want to do is hurt them even more. I’m going back to the ship - can I give one of you the food list?” None of them moved, and Sanji raised an eyebrow at them expectantly.
“Tch,” Zoro stepped forward, hand resting on the hilt of Wado Ichimonji in a way that would look casual to anyone who didn’t know any better, “you running away from a fight that’s not even started, cook?” Sanji took a deep drag of his cigarette, then a bracing breath, and forced himself not to rise to the bait. He tried to keep his expression as light and non-threatening as he could, even as he allowed derision to bleed into his tone.
“No, shit for brains, I’m not running. If you’d listened to what I literally just said, I don’t want to cause these people any more terror. They don’t know I’m not a Vinsmoke - they’re probably expecting the same kind of violence my brothers would’ve inflicted on them.” Nami frowned, and Sanji watched her fists clench as she sent a glare over the locals hovering fearfully in their doorways, or trying to look menacing as they stood protectively in front of their wares.
“Luffy,” she hissed, and when their captain turned to them with his blinding grin firmly in place, she gestured sharply for him to return to them. The man they had been chatting happily to looked over at them in confusion and no small amount of irritation at being interrupted in what Sanji was sure he thought would be his first sale in weeks - Sanji could the exact moment he spotted him by the way his face paled and his eyes widened. Sanji averted his gaze quickly.
Luffy finally seemed to clock onto the tense feeling in the air, and Sanji watched as he reached back to swoop Chopper into one arm and took Usopp’s elbow in his other hand, towing them both back to the main group. Nami’s face was determined when she looked back at Sanji, and he once again found himself desperately wishing he had just stayed on Sunny.
“You have nothing to hide from, Sanji-kun - you aren’t a Vinsmoke, you said it yourself.”
Sanji felt his cheeks burn. “I-I’m not hiding, Nami-san, it's just - it would be cruel to stay here. They’re scared of me. They don’t know any better.”
“Then we’ll show them,” Luffy said, as though it was just that simple. Sanji wondered if he even realised what was happening.
“Luffy…” he began, but Chopper spoke before he could continue, wriggling in their captain’s grasp until he was situated more comfortably. “Luffy’s right, Sanji! We just need to be really nice to them, and they’ll see that they don’t need to be scared - you can tell them you’re a Strawhat, not a Vinsmoke!” Sanji couldn’t help but smile at the little doctor, but shook his head nonetheless.
“No, Chop, not this time,” he dug his neatly folded shopping list out of his pocket, and gave it to Usopp, shoving it into the sharpshooter’s hand when he made no move to take it. “I’m going back to the ship, okay? I’ll have something ready for you guys coming home-”
“No,” Luffy was scowling now, and he was taking on that tone that promised a fight, and Sanji felt his chest tighten as Zoro stepped in front of him when he tried to turn and walk back the way they came. Luffy continued doggedly, “Sanji, you’re staying with us. Like Chopper says, we just need to show them how nice you are - and if they still have a problem with you after that, then we can leave. Or beat them up.” Sanji growled at that, and tried again to protest, but before he could Usopp took one of his arms, and Nami took the other, and he was all but frogmarched further into the now very quiet, very uneasy marketplace.
His palms were sweating, and he desperately wanted to leave, but he knew he wouldn’t, not now. Not now that his nakama had made up their minds, and had asked - no, ordered - him to stay. And, after all, hadn’t he been wrong about this before? Hadn’t he run away from their help, their support, their love before, and regretted it immensely afterwards? Hell, he was still regretting it now, even weeks after leaving Whole Cake Island and Big Mom and Germa and the Vinsmokes behind.
No, he needed to trust his crew in this. They may not understand the magnitude of the situation, of the absolute devastation the Vinsmokes were capable of inflicting, but he knew they would have his back should anything go wrong. And besides, his captain was a true miracle worker - literally a god, now, apparently? - and if anyone would be able to turn hatred into acceptance, it was Luffy.
So. Sanji took a deep breath, and disentangled himself from Usopp’s grip to stub out his cigarette on the sole of his shoe before tucking the end into a tin he kept in his jacket pocket, and forced a smile back onto his face, trying desperately not to picture his brothers’ leering grins as he did so.
I’m not them, he reminded himself firmly, even as his hands shook and his chest tightened. I’m not them, and I just need to prove it to these people.
Nami squeezed his arm reassuringly, and he tried to relax a bit in her grasp. She and Usopp walked him over to the nearest food stall they saw, and Sanji watched as Usopp began comparing the stall’s limited stock with what was written on the now slightly crumpled shopping list he still held. The man behind the counter was staring hard at Sanji, utter loathing in his face, and Sanji fought against his nausea as he tried to keep smiling.
“Hmm, I think we’ll just take the onions and the tomatoes, right Sanji?” Usopp turned to him, and Sanji dragged his eyes away from the venomous glare of the vendor to try to pay attention to what the sharpshooter was saying. “We could also go for the potatoes, but I don’t think we should clear them out completely, right?” Sanji swallowed thickly.
“Um,” his voice was hoarse, and he cleared his throat nervously, acutely aware of how the vendor’s gaze hadn’t shifted at all. “Um, yeah. Wait, no. No. We can take a smaller amount of tomatoes, and a small amount of potatoes. The, uh, the potatoes keep longer-”
“I won’t sell you anything.” Sanji flinched, and he felt Nami’s nails digging into his upper arm with how hard her grip became. He knew this was the point in which he should turn to the man, explain to him that he isn’t there to do them any harm, that he is perfectly willing to negotiate a transaction that benefits them both - but Sanji could do nothing but keep staring at the wrinkled tomatoes in front of him, even as Usopp and Nami both began to argue on his behalf.
“Hey, come on, man-”
“Sanji-kun hasn’t done anything to you-”
“‘Hasn’t done anything’? Look around you - it was them that caused this! Them - those - those monsters-”
“Sanji isn’t one of them-”
“Oh really? He sure fucking looks like one to me. I’ve seen his wanted poster too - tell me, big nose, what’s the name on that wanted poster, huh?”
“I’m afraid that poster is in need of an update, sir,” Robin said from close behind Sanji, and he felt her rest a gentle hand on the small of his back. “Give us some time to rectify the matter - soon it’ll be back to ‘Black Leg Sanji’, just as it should always have been.” Sanji felt a sudden surge of love for the archaeologist so strong it almost brought him to tears. The man only scoffed. Sanji finally managed to look up again, and saw with a strange mixture of relief and guilt that the man had shifted his glare over Sanji’s shoulder, where he was sure the rest of his nakama were stationed around him.
“Change it if you want,” he growled, eyes flashing with rage. “I know - we all know. The whole fucking world knows now. He’s a Vinsmoke-” Sanji flinched again. He was going to have bruises in the shape of Nami’s hand on his arm tomorrow, “no matter how much he tries to hide it-”
“He isn’t a Vinsmoke,” Luffy said, his uncharacteristically quiet voice cutting through everyone else’s nonetheless. “He’s Black Leg Sanji of the Strawhat Pirates. If you have a problem with him then you have a problem with all of us.” The man faltered slightly at that, sweat beading his brow, his eyes flashing rapidly from one Strawhat to the next, and Sanji saw fear enter his gaze, chasing away the anger - he decided then and there that he much preferred the anger.
“We - we don’t want to cause you any trouble,” Sanji said quickly, before any more threats could be made. The man’s eyes cut back to him sharply, and Sanji forced himself to meet them. “I promise, we just want to buy some food, just enough to see us through to the next island. As soon as we have what we need we’ll leave, I swear.”
Sanji watched the man deliberate over his words, watched a fearful looking woman who could only be his wife appear by his side to clutch at his elbow pleadingly, looking at Sanji with a fear that made him feel like he might vomit. For a short moment, Sanji thought that maybe he had managed to get through to the man, or at least that the man’s fear had won out over his rage - but the moment passed, and Sanji watched the man’s face harden with his resolve. Dread pooled in the bottom of his stomach even as he found himself frozen in place, powerless against whatever was coming next.
The man wrenched his arm out of his wife’s grip, and any other day Sanji would have given him an earful about treating women with respect and a solid kick to boot - but today… today Sanji could only watch numbly, as the man stepped forward, and pitched his body over the counter - and spat into Sanji’s face.
The reaction was immediate - and it was immense.
Sanji felt Nami release him at the same time he felt another set of arms pull him back. He heard Usopp and Nami shouting, he heard Brook and Franky roaring - underneath their voices, however, he also heard screaming. He looked behind him, past Robin’s pale, worried face - she was saying something to him, he thought, but he couldn’t make it out - and saw people rushing forward from where they had been watching the exchange at a safe distance. Saw them running towards the commotion with dread and fury and desperation in their faces; saw them holding each other back, or handing each other kitchen knives, violence in their eyes-
“Stop,” he whispered, watching the chaos erupting all around him; the utter havoc his mere presence was able to wreak. “Stop.”
“Enough,” Sanji felt his captain’s Haki wash over him, a shadow of its usual power but still enough to send all of the townsfolk staggering. The sudden silence that descended was deafening. Sanji looked at his captain. Luffy was looking at him, and while his face was calm - serene, even - Sanji saw fire burning behind his eyes. Sanji shook his head at him pleadingly, and saw him clench his fists.
“We’re leaving,” his captain said, his voice quiet and sharp as steel. Nami made a noise of pure outrage, and Zoro growled.
“Luffy,” the swordsman said, his grip on Wado Ichimonji white knuckled, “we can’t just let that pass-”
“We can, and we will.”
“Luffy,” Nami’s voice was shrill with fury and offence, but when Sanji looked at her she had tears in her eyes. “They - we can’t just - just leave. They - he spat at Sanji-kun!” She looked at him, and he opened his mouth to try to reassure her, to beg her, but Luffy spoke again before he had to.
“Nami, Sanji doesn’t want us to fight. So we won’t,” Nami looked like she wanted to say more, but Jinbei stepped forward and rested a calming hand on her shoulder, and instead she only clenched her teeth, angry tears spilling down flushed cheeks. “That’s the only reason,” Luffy continued, and when Sanji looked back at him he saw that Luffy was no longer addressing his navigator, but instead the vendor, whose shirt was clenched roughly in one of Franky’s massive hands. “The only reason that we’re leaving is that Sanji wants us to. Don’t ever forget that.” Then he turned, and took one of Sanji’s hands in his, and walked away. Sanji felt Zoro immediately fall into step behind them, the rest of the crew following a few seconds later.
Sanji tried very hard not to break into a sprint, the weight of the villagers’ glares almost crushing. Luffy’s hand was trembling slightly in his, and his grip was just a bit too tight, and when Sanji risked a glance at him out the corner of his eye he saw a pale fury in his eyes, the likes of which he could only remember seeing in his captain once before in Sabaody - right before he punched a Tenryuubito and brought the World Government down on their heads.
Sanji was very, very happy they were already on their way out. When Luffy had that look in his eyes, who knew what he was likely to do.
Nobody spoke until the town was out of sight. As soon as the town gates disappeared behind the trees Sanji felt a hand on his shoulder, halting his slightly-too-fast pace. He hoped he managed to conceal his flinch, but when he followed the hand to the body it belonged to, and saw the look on Zoro’s face, he knew he hadn’t quite managed. He swallowed thickly, and opened his mouth to try to say something, anything, to lessen the tension thrumming amongst his nakama - but before he could make a sound Zoro extended his other hand.
Sanji blinked dumbly down at it for a few seconds before realising the swordsman was offering him his bandana. When Sanji looked back up at him in confusion, he only huffed and thrust his hand out again. “Your face,” he said in a low voice, “it’s still - you should clean it.”
It was only then that Sanji remembered what had set them all off in the first place, and he was suddenly very aware of the sticky moisture still gathered on his cheek, very narrowly missing his eye. Nami snatched up the bandana before Sanji could even think to move.
“Here, Sanji-kun,” she said. Her voice was trembling with rage and concern and grief, but her hands were gentle as they wiped away the spittle from his face. He wanted to smile for her, for all of them. He wanted to laugh this off, to shrug his shoulders and say, “oh well, better luck at the next island” and move on - but Sanji didn’t think he’d be able to say anything coherent if he tried. He felt numb - completely worn out, as though he had gone toe-to-toe with Kaido himself, and not shouted at by an angry merchant.
“Sanji-kun?” Nami was looking at him, her hand, free of the bandana, resting gingerly on his now clean cheek. “Are you okay?” He was aware of a weight settling against his leg, and looked down to see Chopper, clutching his trousers, sobbing quietly. Sanji could only imagine how terrifying that must have been for the little reindeer, knowing what he did about his past. “Sanji-kun?”
“Sanji,” it was Luffy speaking now, and Sanji felt his captain tug on their still joined hands until he looked at him. He expected Luffy to look angry, like he had back in the town. That quiet fury, strong enough to wipe out the World Government - that’s what Sanji expected to see in his captain’s face now. But instead, when he dragged his eyes away from Chopper’s tearful ones, it was only to find his captain looking close to tears as well.
That was enough to jolt Sanji out of his numbness.
“Wha- Luffy, don’t - why are you crying?”
“I’m sorry,” Luffy said, “I’m really sorry, Sanji.”
Sanji shook his head, “No - why are you apologising, you idiot? It isn’t your fault - it was - let’s just go back to the ship, okay? Can we go back to Sunny?” He looked around at the rest of the crew, hating how miserable they all looked. He remembered how excited they had all been barely twenty minutes ago, remembered the sound of their laughter echoing throughout the trees - he really wished he had stayed on the fucking ship. “Please?”
He looked back at Luffy, and the other man looked ready to say more, but after a long moment he only nodded, scrubbing an arm over his eyes and offering a weak smile.
“Of course, Sanji. Let’s go home.”
Nothing more was said as they walked back to the ship, the sounds of Chopper and Nami and Franky sniffling every few seconds intermingling with the sounds of the forest around them.
When they got back to Sunny, Sanji made his excuses - barely aware of a single thing he was saying - before retreating into the galley. He waited a few minutes to see if anyone was going to follow him, and when he was sure they weren’t, he unlocked the walk-in with trembling hands and shut the heavy door behind him.
Only then did he allow himself to quietly fall apart.