Chapter Text
The Justice League, a group created by superheroes to bring just–
Excuse me?! What the heck is this nonsense?! What do you mean I have to take inspiration from this script? There’s nothing to inspire with this horrible outline!—
People can only read what I say? Well you should have said that before we started!
Okay let’s start again?
Right.
What horrible writing, I’ve seen children do better– I know you heard that! That’s why I said it!
The Justice League’s HQ, The Watchtower, is this huge satellite looking thing that orbits the Earth. Oh, it actually looks kind of sophisticated, mhm, I approve, the white looks really nice. And the whole circular aesthetic makes it look futuristic. The stars twinkle in the backdrop and the moon graces the pathetic eyes of humanity.
Now let’s take a look inside.
‘Superheroes’ walk across the hallways, all in their false fantasy of somehow thinking that they alone can change the world.
Readers may be wondering, ‘What the heck is happening?’. Well, you’re in luck, because according to this stupid outline, it's time for my greatly awaited introduction!
My name is Latormmi Der—
What’s this?!
Alarms are blaring out, blasting everyone’s ear drums. People in funny costumes and masks are moving to a huge open room, a screen turns itself on and we see who is probably Batman, he fits the description the author gave me. Big pointy ears and dark clothing. Pfftt. He looks like a total clown, doesn’t he fight a clown? Why did you ruin my great introduction?
“Superman is requesting backup in metropolis for Lex Luthor and his robots. Flash, go to Central City, you’re needed there. And there’s an earthquake currently due in a couple of minutes, all who can lend a hand, I’m sending the coordinates of the places that will be affected,” Batman says, stoically, really into the whole emo thing, huh?
Oh, but what’s this? Apparently someone is fighting Batman right now. How did he say all that so perfectly?
Right, where shall we go, dear readers? Shall we go see some robots? Or maybe that thing with The Flash? Definitely not the earthquake, all we’ll see is some pathetic heroes pick up pathetic people.
Hmm, tough choice, how about, none of the above?
Let’s go see what Batman didn’t want the Justice League to see. We can finally have the long awaited introduction on the way.
So, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I’m Latormmi Derob, a great immortal, who was bored. So when the author was looking for some good narrators, I very kindly offered my services. Some might say ‘Derob, you’re not qualified for this job,’ but I’ll object, I’ve read many pieces of human literature in the time of my boredom.
And yes, my great immortal powers actually make me the only person capable of this job. Like how right now, I’ve warped the space around us, letting us stand directly in front of–
Batman, I honestly thought that this was going to be interesting,
Well, looks like we missed it.
Scarecrow is tied up with rope, the police sirens are becoming louder and louder. And Batman is driving out of sight in his Batmobile.
There are puddles on the ground, a sign of recent rain. Reflected in their waters are the colours blue and red, giving the dark black and grey space a bit of life.
The police arrive as soon as Batman is gone. There’s a look of confusion on Commissioner Gordon’s face before it’s gone in a flash.
He escorts Scarecrow into the police car while reciting his rights.
And oh, according to my sources, (the author), Batman is heading back to the headquarters.
And so, the readers and author are taken again on the wonderful journey of being teleported back to the Justice League.
Batman walks down the hallway, his cape somehow dancing menacingly in some non-existent wind. Superman is floating down the same hallway. He finished his work quickly, that’s the most powerful hero for you.
What do you mean Batman can defeat Superman?
You clearly don’t know anything, author, I’m the powerful immortal here.
“Superman,” Batman says as he nods his head at Superman.
“Batman! How were things in Gotham?” Superman says.
Nam, how boring, who wants to read about what we just saw? Author, your plot needs more work!
“It was fine,” We all knew that. Talk about the robots!
“Would you like to hear about how things went with Luthor?” Superman circles around Batman, who is clearly annoyed. Ooo, drama!
“No.” What the heck Batman?! That was the only interesting thing about this whole conversation. Just for that, I’m going to look into those emotions that you love hiding.
Muhahaha!
What’s Clark doing? Why is he talking like that? Why’s he showing off his flight? Is he trying to mock me? Or is he telling me that I’m a horrible human being who doesn't know how to talk with friends? Wait, is he my friend? Did I ruin our friendship? Should I—
Ok…
Moving on.
Never doing that again…
So this is the cafeteria. Circular tables fill most of the large expansive space, there is a long rectangular table lined with human food. White marble tiles the floor and through the tall windows reaching from floor to ceiling, the earth is visible. From this side of the earth, dawn is arriving, the new light of the Sun is barely in the cafeteria’s field of vision. Stars light up most of the sky. The inside is lit up with many powerful artificial lights.
I’ve heard that this Justice League’s satellite will forever face the side of the rising sun, with darkness engulfing most of its space.
Wonder Woman is talking with Martian Manhunter who is devouring some human biscuits. What’s that? Something called ‘Oreos’. Let me try.
Jsadhgiugiakldf! (What’s this? Keyboard smash? What the heck is that?)
These Oreos! The only way to describe this intensely good flavour is to say that this is a gift from the heavens! The chocolate! The cream thingy inside! Everything concocted together to make this delightful little cookie!
Mawrtiam Mamhumwter suddamly tuns hes head!
Oh no!
“What happened?” Wonder Woman asks.
“I thought I sensed another being here, it’s thoughts were loud,” The Martian says.
“What was it thinking?”
“About how the oreos were a gift of heaven?” he says, unsure now that the immortal has moved to a safe distance, which is right across their table.
“Haha,” Wonder Woman laughs, “That’s probably just your own thoughts!”
The Martian nods.
Author, when is the next plot point? What do you mean it happens tomorrow? I’m not waiting a whole Earth day, that’s way too long!
Then The Flash zips past them sitting down next to Wonder Woman, he sets down his tray which is obnoxiously filled with so much junk food, burgers, fries, so many fried things, a pizza, and a huge glass of some soft drink.
“Hi guys!” he says while stuffing his mouth with food.
Can I have a bite?
Aha! I have thought of the perfect way to pass the time!
We see The Flash’s already quick eating becoming even quicker until he has become a blur. Superheroes speed in and out while time is being sped up so that this great immortal will not be bored and make others bored while reading this story.
And now it’s tomorrow! Well, it’s today now…
The Flash is still eating, it’s a new meal, but it’s still obnoxiously huge. The word ‘obnoxious’ should be dedicated to The Flash only.
Is that Batman rushing across the cafeteria?
The Flash seems to have spotted him, “Hey, Bats! What’s with the rush?”
“Scarecrow escaped Arkham,” he says before disappearing down the hallway.
“I can help,” The Flash says, then follows Batman down the hallway.
The Flash and Batman both enter a Zeta tube, but the shouting does seem to indicate that Batman is less than happy with the help.
Mhm, this tube works by rearranging atoms in another location. It probably won’t work for a being barely more than a concept.
We all can go by our usual space warping.
Oh wait, this isn’t Gotham. This is not dark or gloomy, where’s all the excess pollution that’s worse than New Delhi’s?
And is that a giant statue of The Flash? Looks new.
This is Central City, isn’t it?
Is this why The Flash was called yesterday?
Then the three of them hear ear piercing screams.
Yellow strips surround a section of the park and police line the border.
Inside there are people screaming in terror. Some of the humans are on the ground, some are screaming, some are crying, big ugly tears stream down many of the men and women there, fat pearls of misery contort their faces into ugly messes. Some people were even standing up watching some invisible horror unfold in front of them. There’s some blood scattered here and there, no human was faring well in here.
This wasn’t pretty at all.
In the middle of all the chaos is Scarecrow somehow standing in Central City, miles away from Gotham.
“What is Scarecrow doing?” The Flash asks.
“I’ll start administering the antidote, you take care of Scarecrow,” Batman says.
Author, what sort of plot is this? I thought this would be a light-hearted story. This isn’t what I signed up for!
The Flash then zaps past everyone to throw a punch at Scarecrow. Electricity sparking at every turn he makes. But The Flash only punches air. What? The Scarecrow appears behind The Flash and punches him.
The fastest man alive wasn’t able to see that coming? I didn’t see it?
“What?” The Flash says, clearly confused.
Batman also looks just as confused. The antidotes he is giving aren’t working.
“What’s happening?” The Flash asks.
“Something new,” The Scarecrow says menacingly.
The Flash then tries to give a series of punches, but Scarecrow warps out of the way.
Hey! Scarecrow’s teleporting like how I do! Author! What the heck is this? I’m supposed to be the only being who can do all this!
“Since when can Scarecrow teleport?!” The Flash shouts.
“He can’t” Batman replies, he joins the fight against Scarecrow, but neither of them are able to land a single hit on him.
“Look at what he’s holding!” Batman says.
Scarecrow is holding a black gemstone the size of his palm. A gemstone that looks oddly familiar. Wait! Did he somehow acquire a cheap imitation of my stones?!
Author!! You better have an explanation ready! You said that I won’t be involved in the plot! Only the narration!
And oh– No wonder!
The gemstone suddenly starts glowing,
The Flash stopped moving, he stared straight ahead, his eyes wide open, “Mom,” he whispers.
“Flash?”
“Mom!” The Flash says much louder.
Batman looks at the gemstone, coming to a conclusion.
The gemstone shows people their fears, and right now, The Flash is staring at his.
“Flash! It's not real, snap out of it!”
Oh but it is real. The gem only shows real things that people have gone through, or my gem did.
The Flash is experiencing whatever happened on that day. It must have not been pretty, if the tears have anything to say.
Batman looks at The Flash.
“Snap out of it, Barry!” Batman shouts
That gives The Flash a moment of clarity, enough to surprise Scarecrow and take the gem out.
And then Batman punches Scarecrow in the face, who goes out cold.
One hit, really? You’d imagine that after all this time he would have gained some strength.
“Flash, are you–?”
“I– I can still see her,”
Nam, these people are so awkward. Do they know that destroying the gem will end all their suffering? That has to be obvious.
There are still people screaming around them.
The Flash drops the gemstone on the ground, it shatters into pieces.
All around them, people are gaining clarity.
The Flash also seems a lot calmer.
Batman picks up the shards of the broken gemstone, and stores them in his utility belt.
“What happened here?” One of the officers asks.
Yes, even I would like to know that.
Author! I think it’s time you explained your stupid plot.
Apparently I have to finish this chapter first. Fine.
The Flash then proceeds to explain what happened, occasionally looking at Batman for help.
“Well, this was an interesting morning,” The Flash laughs, it’s one of those laughs that humans make when they feel uncomfortable.
And The Flash looks very uncomfortable.
I feel you, The Flash.
The Flash and Batman go back to the Zeta tube.
And we will see them again, next time…
For, This is a Stor—
What the heck?! Author? Why is your writing so horrendous? Even my mortal enemy can do better! You terrible excuse of a human being, you should destroy all your devices, so that no one will read this! Or maybe you should just remove your hands—