Work Text:
The sun was just setting over the mountains by the time he hitched Roch to a tree for the evening. He patted her and thanked her for the day's hard work. Turning to the saddlebags to retrieve the things he needed for tonight's visit. His hands were shaking, but not from cold nor chills. No, with the knowledge of what was to come, what he'd get to say once more.
With one last brush of a sword collosed hand over soft umber coat, he looked into her eyes, as if seeking the courage he knew he needed, but didn't quite find in himself. He let go of the breath he didn't know he was holding “well, i'll see you soon”
Trekking through the darkening forest he felt his heart starting to saden by a darkness in him and the push of memories long since buried and no wish to uncover. But also a light flutter as he reminisces over warm summer nights listening to nothing but faint snores and the sounds of the forest. Long days on the path as elegant and light notes led the way and soaking in the pools at Kaer Morhen as laughter filled the humid air.
As he walked he tried to only remember the good, but the push of red, horrid wails and pleas for peace came barging to the front of his thoughts.
For all others there were none but the sounds of the forest to be heard, but for Geralt, there were no chirping birds, no breeze brushing the leaves. Only the squelshing of liquids filling up frail and bruised lungs and the pleading vispers begging for release. Closing his eyes he could see the moment when the winds wisps away the force from the frail and weak body in his arms and let float away to better lands.
Suddenly he stoppes in his tracks, all the forest coming back to him. A clearing opening at his feet. Surrounded by mighty trees arching up, reaching for the heavens. Where birds were nesting and chirping. Flowers sprouting up and glistening in the setting summer sun, in all wondrous colors letting bees buzz and flourish. Grass and leaves, green and lush, giving food to the small critters calling this place home. And in the middle, a steadfast, weathered rock, moss slowly forming at the top with a tiny sprout where a butterfly rested peacefully. The clearing was brimming to the edges with life,
just as Jaskier would wish for.
Geralt gasped a sudan breath of air, feeling like he just crested up from deep freezing waters for a first air. “Jaskier” the name was but a fleeting whisper on his lips.
Geralt took timid steps towards the rock. Kneeling down and resting his forehead to the cold, hard surface. “I've missed you so” the words left his lips like the air from his lungs.
“My friend, my dearest friend, how I've missed you'' the ever so faint smile present as Geralt sat back on his feet, breathing out, feeling the pressure of tears behind his eyes.
Geralt brushed some of the leaves of the rock and laid down the flowers he’d brought. Dandelions, Jaskiers favorit. Clutching the tuning key around his neck he looked back to the stone
“This year has been good. took your advice, made new friends'' Geralt spoke, hoping his friend listened, but feeling the warm breeze brushing his chek. He knew Jaskier was there.
He made himself more comfortable as he continued to speak, reminiscing over their time together and the time since his last visit . Finally having the peace to speak freely, it lifted a weight from Geralt's chest he didn't know was there.
Coming down from the laughter after remembering an especially chaotic night Jaskier had once had, where he'd again needed Geralt to save him from a furious lover. His tone became more serious, still light to it tho
“I truly hope you're happy, that you are no longer in pain. I so-” Geralt's voice broke, not bearing his words next and a lonesome tear trickled down and buried itself in the bush of beard.
Willing the words out with a shaky breath Geralt continued “I so wish I could have done something, Just something, anything to relieve the pain, stop the agony you suffered. And I so hated seeing your body growing weak and frail”
Geralt let his head fall in his hands. Voice pained with sorrow and regret, most so hatred for himself “I hate that I had no power, it wasn't some monster to be slain. I was powerless. I-” a soft sob broke off the words, Geralt shoulders shaking as he silently let the tears fall on his friend's grave.
Geralt whispered through sobs “I failed you, Jaskier” as another wave of sobs raked through the strong body, where he leaned on his hands and dug his finger in the moist dirt. “I'm so sorry I failed you”
Letting his body falter, Geralt felt the power of his loss pull at his heart. With shaky hands he one last time pulled himself up and leaned over to the stone. But this time he let his lips touch the cold surface and felt as salty tears ran down and dampened the unwavering rock before him
Endings are never easy. They are pained, full of sorrow and longing. hate and self doubt.
And so, with one last brush of a sword collosed hand over cold hard stone Geralt stood to his feet whispering
“I miss you Jaskier”