Chapter Text
❀
In the quiet village of Kyobashi, where sakura trees bloomed in the spring and cicadas hummed in the summer, happiness belonged to those who chased it through sunlit fields and quiet nights. The village streets and hidden corners held memories of playful days—at least to Sanemi and his younger siblings. They lived just next door, and to them, you weren’t just a neighbor. You were their best friend.
One warm spring afternoon, you stood at your front door with a basket of freshly made red bean mochis. The bright colors and delightful aroma had attracted the attention of the young Shinuzagawa siblings.
“What is that?” Teiko, the oldest of the two girls, asked, her voice filled with wonder as she gazed at the basket with wide, sparkling eyes, her curiosity and excitement palpable. She was around the same height as you—maybe just a little shorter.
Before you could answer, the rest of the children came running towards you. They crowded the doorway, jostling for a closer look at the delicious treats you held. “Oh,” you chuckled, carefully balancing the basket as Sumi and Shuya hugged you, nearly causing you to stumble, “My mother and I made ohagi!” you replied.
The children's eyes widened with delight at the sight of the glistening, sweet rice cakes. You could see their eagerness as they reached out to take one, their small hands trembling with anticipation.
“There's plenty for everyone.” The sakura petals gently falling around you seemed to celebrate this moment, their delicate beauty mirroring the pure happiness of the children gathered at their door. Little Hiroshi, who resembled his big brother Genya the most, looked up at you as he munched on his rice cake, curiosity in his eyes.
“Where is Yui?” he asked, his voice slightly muffled by the sweet treat.
You turned to him, smiling at the mention of your only little brother.
“Yuito’s helping Father with something. He’ll come over in a bit.”
As you chatted with the Shinazugawa siblings, laughter and conversation filling the space between you, your thoughts briefly wandered to the two brothers who weren’t there—Sanemi and Genya.
“Do you think Yuyu will bring more treats?” Shuya asked, his eyes hopeful. You giggled at their nickname for your brother.
“I brought a lot, so I think it’s enough—” You glanced at the now empty basket... and gasped.
“Hey, what’s going on there?”
A familiar voice called out from a distance.
You perked up at the sound of Sanemi’s voice, excitement bubbling up—only for a pang of guilt to creep in as your eyes flicked to the now-empty basket that had once been filled with ohagi. Not wanting him to notice, you hurriedly tucked it behind you, hoping to keep the secret just a little longer—
“Y/n made ohagi!” Sumi exclaimed, her voice full of excitement, followed by a chorus of comments like, “It was delicious!” and “We ate it all!”
Genya’s eyes widened in betrayal. “You guys ate everything?!” he repeated, as if confirming the greatest injustice of his life. The ox cart he’d been pushing was forgotten entirely—dropped with a dull thud as he took off at full speed toward you.
“H-Hey!” Sanemi barked, lunging to steady the cart before it rolled away. “Wait for me!” But his younger brother was already halfway across the yard, determined to mourn—or possibly demand—the ohagi he never got to taste.
As Genya reached you, his eyes darted around the area, first to his giggling brothers and sisters, then back to you, scanning every inch of the space as though the missing ohagi might magically reappear.
“Is there really no more?” he asked, his voice breathless with anticipation, as if you might summon a piece from thin air to satisfy the desperate hunger in his gaze.
Sanemi finally caught up, slightly out of breath but wearing a mischievous grin. “Did you guys finish it all?” he teased, glancing at the younger children, who were still animatedly discussing just how good the rice cakes had been.
“Well... I swear, me and my mother made enough ohagi for everyone, but...” you began, your voice trailing off as your gaze fell on the empty basket. The younger children, sensing the shift in the air, couldn’t help but giggle.
Teiko, her face still dotted with remnants of red bean paste, stepped forward with a sheepish smile. “We ate them all,” she confessed, as though offering up a delicious secret.
Sanemi and Genya exchanged looks of mock horror, and then burst into laughter. “I guess we’ll just have to make sure we’re here next time,” Sanemi said, ruffling Teiko’s hair affectionately.
Sanemi then fixed his eyes on you, a warm smile spreading across his face. “Thanks for the rice cakes,” he said sincerely.
You felt a flutter of happiness at his words, appreciating his kindness. “You’re welcome,” you replied, your own smile growing. “I’ll make sure there will be enough for you and Genya next time.”
“Nii-chan doesn’t really like ohagi though,” Genya said, followed by a light slap from Teiko as she retorted.
You turned to Sanemi, your curiosity piqued. “You don’t?” you asked, your brows furrowing in confusion. Your mind briefly flashed back to the first time you and Sanemi had met. Back then, your mother would often make her specialty ohagi—now a rare treat.
You’d insist he try some, but he had always been annoyed, refusing to accept the friendship offered through rice cakes. But after what felt like an eternity of coaxing, he’d finally eaten one—after what felt like the 834th attempt. Since then, you and your mother had continued making ohagi, always sharing some with his family whenever you could.
Sanemi only looked away from your gaze, his ears turning a faint pink.
“He never eats one whenever we have it!” Teiko interjected, “We try to make him eat some, but he just never does…”
You smiled, an idea forming in your mind. “Maybe we can change that... again.”
Sanemi glanced back at you. “W-What? Again?”
“You’ll see.”
❀
The next day, you successfully convinced your mother to make another batch of ohagi with you. Despite having only a few ingredients left, you managed to make six freshly baked rice balls—three each for the two brothers. Excited, you quickly rushed to the Shinazugawa residence with two little bags in hand.
As you approached, you were greeted by Teiko, who was walking with their youngest sibling, Koto.
"Teiko-chan!" you called out, a smile spreading across your face. "My mother and I made some more ohagi for Sanemi-kun and Genya-kun."
Teiko's eyes lit up with delight. "Really? That's wonderful!" she exclaimed. "Genya is taking an afternoon nap right now. I can give his bag to him when he wakes up."
"Thank you, Teiko," you said, handing her one of the bags. "And what about Sanemi-kun?"
Teiko’s smile shifted, taking on a mischievous edge. "Sanemi-nii is actually on his way to your house," she said, barely able to contain a giggle.
Your heart gave a quick, unexpected jolt. "What? Why?" you asked, doing your best to keep your voice even.
"I-uh..." Teiko suddenly started playing with her nails, mumbling a barely audible statement, “Oh… well… he said he misses hanging out… with… you…”
You felt a rush of warmth and surprise. “R-Really?” you asked, a soft smile tugging at your lips. “That’s sweet of him. I'll head back and make sure he gets his share too."
You bid Teiko and Koto goodbye before turning around to head back home.
As you walked, your thoughts lingered on Sanemi. The notion that he might miss spending time with you stirred a little something in your chest, though you quickly brushed it aside when you caught sight of him outside your house, kicking stones with casual indifference, his back to you.
With a playful glint in your eye, you tiptoed closer, heart pounding with anticipation.
Just as your fingertips hovered over his sides, ready to unleash a surprise tickle, Sanemi moved in a blur.
In a swift motion, he spun around, catching you off guard, and before you knew it, his arms wrapped around you as he tackled you gently to the ground.
“Gotcha!” Sanemi declared triumphantly, grinning down at you. The two of you tumbled in a flurry of giggles, rolling over the soft earth. The world seemed to slow around you, the rustling of leaves and distant chirping of birds fading into the background as your laughter filled the air.
You laughed, catching your breath. “How did you know I was there?”
He smirked, helping you back up. “I’ve got reeaaally sharp senses, Y/n. You can’t sneak up on me that easily.”
As you dusted yourself off, you held up the bag of ohagi, careful not to look as flustered as you were inside. “I got you something. My mother and I made these earlier.”
Sanemi’s eyes lit up, and he took the bag from you, his expression softening. “You didn’t have to go through all that trouble.”
“It’s no trouble at all,” you insisted. “I’ll make you a thousand ohagi if I have to, until you like them.”
He chuckled, opening the bag and taking out one of the rice balls. “These are for me and Genya?”
“Oh, no. Genya-kun has his own bag. I was just on my way to drop them off when Teiko-chan mentioned he was napping, and that you were heading to my house.”
Sanemi raised an eyebrow. “Genya isn’t sleeping. He’s preparing dinner with—oh.” A hint of blush crept onto his cheeks.
“Oh?” you prompted, curiosity piqued.
“N-Nothing,” he cleared his throat, looking away.
You nudged him lightly. “Come on, what’s really going on?”
Sanemi hesitated for a moment, before letting out a deep sigh and rubbing the back of his neck. “Teiko might’ve made that up... about Genya sleeping. She’s been trying to play... matchmaker.”
You blinked, your cheeks warming slightly.“Really?... Teiko’s got quite the imagination.”
Sanemi gave a sheepish smile. “Y-Yeah, she does...”
The two of you stood there for a moment, the silence hanging between you, heavy with a blend of awkwardness and something else—something neither of you could quite put into words. It was Sanemi who cleared his throat and shattered the stillness
“I- Do you wanna go for a walk in the river?” he asked, his words fumbling slightly.
You nodded, a soft smile tugging at your lips, the awkwardness from before melting away.
As you both began walking, you caught your foot on an uneven stone, stumbling just enough to feel the flutter of excitement and nervousness creeping in. “You should eat your ohagi before it gets cold,” you suggested, glancing at the bag in Sanemi’s hand, your tone light yet somehow warm.
He glanced down at the neatly packed rice balls and let out a soft chuckle. "Right. Good idea," he murmured, his voice warm with appreciation. Reaching into the box, he carefully picked up one of the ohagi, inspecting it for a moment before taking a bite. His expression softened as he chewed slowly, savoring the sweet, sticky taste. You watched him intently, your heart fluttering with anticipation, eager for his reaction.
“This is... I...” he began, still chewing, his words trailing off as though he were searching for the right ones.
You blinked, leaning in slightly, your eyes fixed on him, waiting.
After a brief pause, he swallowed and met your gaze, a flash of surprise lighting up his face. “I’ve been missing out on this.”
A wave of relief washed over you, and you let out a soft, contented sigh, your lips curling into a smile.
As you continued walking along the river, the golden hues of the setting sun reflected off the water, creating a serene and picturesque backdrop. The air was filled with the gentle rustling of leaves and the distant sound of birds settling in for the evening.
“Why didn’t you ever eat ohagi, though? We’ve been making it for you and your brothers and sisters for so long. I thought you always ate them…”
Sanemi chewed thoughtfully before answering. “I’m sorry, I... it wasn’t that I didn’t like ohagi. It’s just that... my siblings. They love these.” He looked a bit sheepish, then continued, “Whenever we had ohagi or any rice cakes, I always let them have it…”
Your eyes widened, and your heart warmed at his words. “That’s really sweet of you.”
You couldn’t say you were entirely surprised that his reason had something to do with his siblings. He had always been the type to put them first.
He shrugged, a modest smile playing on his lips. "I guess. But I'm glad I finally get to eat some... thanks to you."
❀
It was a few days before your 16th birthday, and you had plans to celebrate with your close friends and family. Despite the anticipation for the upcoming celebration, a quiet sense of loneliness had settled over you in recent days. You hadn’t spent much time with Sanemi lately, and you realized just how much you missed his company, more than you had expected.
As you walked along the river, the familiar path felt strangely empty without him by your side. The rustling of the leaves and the gentle murmur of the water seemed to echo the loneliness in your chest.
But then, as if the universe had heard your unspoken thoughts, you blinked, certain you were imagining things, only to find him there.
He was sitting under a large tree, his back leaning against the weathered trunk, eyes fixed on something distant, lost in his own thoughts. For a moment, you just stood there, taking in the sight of him.
What was he doing here all by himself?
Without a second thought, you made your way toward him, a wide smile spreading across your face. The sight of him, sitting there in the shade of the tree, filled you with an unexpected joy.
“Y/n?” Sanemi’s voice broke the quiet, and he looked up at you, clearly surprised.
His eyes softened just a little, though he didn’t make any move to stand. Instead, he just watched you for a moment, as if taking you in. Something flickered in his gaze, something familiar, maybe even comforting. You couldn’t quite place it, but it was there.
"Mind if I sit beside my best friend?" you asked playfully, already lowering yourself onto the soft patch of grass next to him.
Sanemi shook his head, a small, reluctant smile tugging at the corners of his lips. You couldn’t help but chuckle as you settled next to him, the air between you suddenly feeling warmer, more familiar.
“I’m your best friend?”
You scoffed lightly, glancing over at him with a mock-serious expression. “Who else would it be?”
He looked flustered by your quick and casual response, his gaze shifting away from you and towards the river, his fingers idly tracing the ground. "I thought that girl, Tsumugi, was your best friend," he muttered, almost as if trying to convince himself of it.
You blinked in surprise. “‘That girl,’ Tsumugi-chan is lovely, very pretty, and I consider her a good friend, yes." You paused, the teasing note in your voice slipping away, only for a moment. “But you—” you added, glancing over at him with a small, knowing smile, “—you’re still my best friend.”
Sanemi grumbled, clearly embarrassed by the compliment, but his body language betrayed him.
He hugged his knees tighter, eyes fixed on the water as if it were the most interesting thing in the world. “I find her annoying,” he muttered, his voice thick with mild irritation. “She’s always all over me. Her voice… it’s like nails on a chalkboard. It pierces through my eardrums like a knife.”
You bit back a grin, inwardly agreeing about the shrill tone of Tsumugi’s voice, but you didn’t want to let him off that easily. Giving him a sideways look, you raised an eyebrow. “That’s not very nice, Sanemi-kun.”
He huffed, but there was a softness in his gaze as he glanced back at you. “Yeah, well. It’s true,” he said with a shrug, though the smallest of smiles tugged at his lips.
"She likes you," you said, catching him off guard again.
Sanemi froze for a moment, his brain seemingly short-circuiting as the words registered in slow motion. He choked on air, a soft cough escaping his lips as he shivered slightly, the realization finally hitting him.
“Huh?!” he exclaimed, his face flushing a little at the thought.
“You raised an eyebrow, a smirk creeping across your face. "Yes, she has a crush on you. Haven’t you noticed?"
Sanemi blinked, clearly trying to process the information, then glanced at you in disbelief. “A-And you’re okay with that?” he asked, his tone a mixture of confusion and genuine concern.
"Why… would I not be?"
“...Forget it,” he muttered, shaking his head, clearly overwhelmed by the turn the conversation had taken. “I can’t stand her, you know that. No offense, though—since she’s a ‘good friend’ of yours or whatever…” His voice trailed off, his discomfort growing by the second. He stared at the ground, probably wishing he could vanish into it.
You laughed softly, amused by his awkwardness. "No offense taken. But she’s harmless, you know.”
Sanemi groaned dramatically, his eyes rolling to the heavens, clearly at a loss. “Well, she can find someone else to bug,” he grumbled, clearly not keen on the idea of dealing with Tsumugi’s attention any longer.
You patted his shoulder reassuringly. “Maybe you’re just too popular, Sanemi-kun.”
He snorted in response, “I don’t care about popularity. I have my siblings, my mom… and you.”
A soft blush crept up your neck as you leaned back on your hands, letting the tranquility of the moment wash over you. “I know I probably say this every day, but you’re really sweet.”
“You didn’t say it yesterday,” he joked.
You playfully punched his arm. “That’s because you’ve been busy! I haven’t seen you for days. Where’ve you been anyway?”
Sanemi hesitated for a moment, scratching the back of his head. “Had to take care of something. I was out of town with my mother…”
You raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. “Out of town? What for?”
He quickly looked away, a faint blush creeping onto his cheeks. “Uhm… stuff…” he muttered, clearly evasive.
You knew him too well—lying was never his strong suit, and the way he fidgeted gave him away. You squinted at him suspiciously but decided not to push further. Instead, a small smile tugged at your lips as you switched the subject.
“My birthday’s in a few days,” you said, “you’re coming, right?”
He turned to you, scoffing, “Seriously? I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
You hesitated for a moment, your smile faltering slightly. “I actually don’t want to celebrate it, but Yuito insists. I’d rather have my family spend money on his medicine since he’s currently sick. Inviting a lot of people would mean we have to prepare a feast, and I don’t want to celebrate without him either.”
Sanemi’s expression softened, and he moved closer, his concern evident. “I didn’t know little Yui was sick. Is he going to be okay?”
You shrugged, worry lingered in your eyes. “I don’t know if he’s getting any better, it’s been tough for him. That’s why I don’t feel like celebrating too much.”
Sanemi placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “Hey, how about we keep it small and simple? Just close friends and family. We can all pitch in and make sure your brother gets what he needs. Your birthday should be a happy day, for both of you.”
You felt a wave of gratitude.
He smiled, a genuine and warm smile that made your heart flutter. “We’ll make it special, like always. I promise.”
The sun continued to set, painting the sky with hues of orange and pink. As you sat together, the river’s gentle flow mirrored the sense of peace and support you felt from your friend. In that moment, you realized that no matter how many problems lay ahead, you wouldn’t face them alone.
“Remember last year?” Sanemi said, breaking the comfortable silence. “You thought I forgot about your birthday.”
You did remember. It was one of those quiet moments you kept tucked away in your mind—moments you never fully understood until you reflected on them later. Last year, you and your family had prepared lunch for your friends, including the Shinazugawa siblings. It was meant to be a joyous gathering, a celebration. But there was one empty seat. Sanemi’s seat.
At first, you assumed he was simply running late, that he had lost track of time or was caught up with something. But as the afternoon wore on and your friends began to leave, a small knot of disappointment tightened in your chest.
You were closing the door, the echo of your footsteps the last sound lingering in the house, when you heard the soft crunch of footsteps on the gravel path. Expecting it to be one of your friends who had forgotten something, you opened the door, only to find Sanemi standing there, his expression unreadable but his presence unmistakable.
In his hands was an ikebana arrangement, the delicate flowers arranged in a way that almost seemed to reflect the colors of your favorite kimono. It was a gesture so thoughtful that it instantly melted the disappointment that had lingered in your heart.
You smiled softly, the memory of that moment still fresh in your mind.
“You were worth the wait,” you murmured, and for the first time that day, you truly felt it. "I was so surprised."
Sanemi chuckled, a hint of embarrassment in his eyes. “Yeah, I wanted to make it special. You know I’m not that great with words, so I figured the flowers could speak for me.”
The arrangement had been stunning, each element carefully chosen and arranged with precision and care. The base was composed of slender willow branches, their graceful lines creating a sense of movement. At the heart of the arrangement was a single, vibrant camellia blossom, its deep crimson petals mirroring the beauty of your favorite kimono. Delicate sprigs of baby’s breath surrounded the camellia, adding a soft, ethereal touch. Tall stalks of green bamboo added height and strength, while moss-covered stones at the base grounded the composition, with ivy leaves trailing softly from them.
You never asked where he got the ikebana, even though you knew such arrangements cost a lot in shops. Your frequent window shopping excursions had taught you that much. It was only later, in a casual conversation with Genya, that you discovered the truth. Sanemi got some of the flowers from the nearby forest and grown others in their home.
However, on the day of your celebration, one of the flowers in the bouquet he had prepared wilted unexpectedly. Determined to make it perfect, he had gone back to the forest early that morning to find a replacement, which was why he missed your celebration.
You never told Sanemi that you knew the lengths he went to for the ikebana, but it didn’t surprise you. He always went all out for gifts. You had seen this firsthand when he saved up enough money to buy his mother the sandals she had been admiring.
You remembered how hard he worked, taking on odd jobs and saving every penny. When he finally presented the sandals to his mother, the joy on her face had been priceless. It was a testament to Sanemi's determination and thoughtfulness.
Thinking about that, you felt a deeper appreciation for the ikebana he had made for you. It wasn’t just the beauty of the flowers; it was the effort, care, and intention behind it that made it special.
Sanemi, noticing the thoughtful look on your face, nudged you gently with his elbow. "What are you thinking about?" he asked, his tone curious but soft.
You smiled warmly, the memory bringing a gentle glow to your expression. "Just remembering how you saved up to buy your mom those sandals for her birthday. You always put so much effort into your gifts."
“It’s not a big deal,” he mumbled, clearly downplaying it, though the slight embarrassment showed he was proud of it.
You watched him for a moment, a quiet fondness settling in your heart. You prayed silently that he would never change—that no matter what life threw his way, he would always remain the kind-hearted, selfless person you had come to cherish deeply.
❀
It was the night before your 16th birthday, and you smiled as you found Genya reading a storybook to your brother, who was lying in bed sick. You had just returned home from running some errands with your father. Hiroshi was also there, sitting on the floor, painting on a parchment.
Your brother Yuito and Genya were around the same age, while Hiroshi was about two years younger. The three of them hung out together the most, their bond evident in the way they shared these quiet, comforting moments.
You stood in the doorway, watching as Genya animatedly read the story, his voice bringing the tale to life. Yuito's eyes were bright with interest, despite his illness, and Hiroshi was completely absorbed in his activity.
After a while, Genya glanced up and noticed you standing there. He closed the book with a soft thud, and both he and Yuito turned to you, their faces lighting up with warm smiles.
“Oh, don’t mind me,” you said, waving your hand casually, not wanting to interrupt their moment.
Hiroshi, however, sprang to his feet and ran to you with a beaming smile, wrapping his small arms around your waist. “Y/n!”
You returned his hug, laughing softly. “Hey there! What are you painting?” you asked, ruffling his hair affectionately.
“It’s you! For your birthday!” Hiroshi exclaimed, his excitement evident as he picked up his painting from the floor and proudly showed you.
Genya walked over with the book in his hand. “Y/n-san, we’ll be back tomorrow. I didn’t realize it was getting so late. Mother and Nii-chan will be worried.”
“Oh, of course. Did you guys have dinner already?”
“Yes, we did before visiting Yuito. Hiroshi missed him a lot, as much as I did. I hope he gets better soon.”
You hoped so, too.
You walked them to the front door, squinting as you spotted Sanemi approaching from a distance. The lantern he carried cast a warm, steady glow, cutting through the evening's darkness.
“Nii-chan!” Genya called out, his face lighting up as he walked toward his older brother. “You didn’t have to come all the way here to fetch us…”
Sanemi’s expression was a mix of sternness and concern as he took in the sight of them. “There’s no way I’d let you guys walk home alone at this hour,” he scolded, his gaze shifting between Genya and Hiroshi. “And without a lamp! Where’s the one you brought?”
Genya blinked, looking sheepish. “Oh… I think I left it inside, in Yui-chan’s room. I’ll go get it.” Without waiting for a response, he dashed back inside, leaving you alone with Hiroshi, who was now being carried by Sanemi, his head resting contentedly on his big brother’s shoulder.
You smiled at the tender scene. “Hiroshi gave me a gift,” you said softly, glancing at the sleeping child. “I think he’s going to be a great painter one day.” You couldn’t help but giggle at the thought.
Sanemi smiled as he looked at you. “What did he paint?”
“Me,” you chuckled, enjoying the way Sanemi’s eyes warmed at your words. Sanemi gently adjusted his hold on Hiroshi, who snuggled closer, his tiny breaths steady and rhythmic.
He cooes. “I’d love for them to stay, but I need to get them home before our mother arrives,” Sanemi said.
“Don’t worry, I understand. They can always come back anytime.”
Meanwhile, Genya returned to Yuito’s room and was taken aback by the sight before him. Yuito was standing by the bedside table, holding a piece of paper in his hands, his gaze fixed intently on Hiroshi’s painting of his sister.
“Yui?” Genya said softly, careful not to startle him. “Why are you up? You should be in bed. Your fever’s still quite bad.” He approached slowly, reaching out to touch Yuito’s shoulder gently.
Yuito looked up, his expression a mixture of uncertainty and vulnerability. “Do you think Onee-san thinks I’m a good little brother?” His voice was barely above a whisper, so faint that Genya almost missed it.
Genya was momentarily taken aback, confusion etched on his face. “Huh? Why do you ask that?” he inquired gently, his concern deepening.
A brief silence followed, during which Genya could sense Yuito wrestling with his thoughts. Then, Yuito tilted his head and forced a bright but fragile smile. “It’s nothing,” he said, though the uncertainty in his eyes betrayed his true feelings.
Genya stood beside him, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “Yui, you’re the best little brother Y/n could ever ask for. She loves you very much.”
Yuito’s smile wavered, “You think so?”
“I know so.”
Despite Genya's comforting words, Yuito didn’t seem entirely convinced. Genya, however, was more concerned about Yuito's health and the need for him to get back to bed before he collapsed from exhaustion.
“Now, let’s get you tucked in,” Genya said, guiding him back under the covers. “You need to rest and get better. Tomorrow’s your big sister’s birthday.”
As Genya tucked him in, Yuito held onto the painting, his fingers lightly tracing the lines. Genya watched him for a moment, then quietly left the room with the lamp he left earlier, closing the door softly behind him. He headed back outside where you and Sanemi were waiting.
“Everything okay?” you asked, noticing the concerned look on Genya’s face.
Genya nodded with an assuring smile. You didn’t think much of it.
“We’ll be back tomorrow for your special day,” Sanemi said as Genya walked past you. You managed a smile in his direction, though it didn’t quite reach your eyes. Sanemi, perceptive as always, seemed to understand the heaviness of your thoughts.
"Hey," Sanemi stepped closer, his hand gently touching your arm. Genya also stopped walking, glancing back at both of you. "You deserve all the happiness on your birthday. Don't worry too much about Yuito. He'll get better, I promise."
“You can’t promise something like that, Sanemi-kun...” Your smile faded, revealing the heaviness of your worries. Sanemi noticed the change in your expression and the way you stared intently at the ground, a frown settling on his face. Without a word, he walked back to Genya, carefully swapping the sleeping Hiroshi he was carrying for the lamp Genya held.
As Sanemi approached you again, you felt a gentle touch on your chin. He lifted your face to meet his gaze, his eyes filled with a vibrant warmth that had always captivated you. You’ve always admired his eyes; always so full of life and warmth.
For the past few days, your little brother’s fever has been erratic—sometimes spiking high, other times leaving him icy cold. It’s something you’ve never witnessed before, and neither had your village's doctor, who had visited your home several times. Frustration gnawed at you as you listened to her, despite your best efforts to remain respectful. It felt as if she was indifferent to Yuito’s condition. She would examine him, admit she’d never treated a case like his before, suggest that rest might help, and promise to research and then prescribe more herbs. But nothing is changing.
Your little brother was not getting any better.
That’s why you feel like you didn’t deserve to celebrate your birthday. The only reason you were even considering it was because both Yuito and Sanemi insisted. Your mother had reluctantly agreed, promising to prepare a few snacks in the afternoon. Your father, on the other hand, was hesitant. It was only Yuito’s earnest wish for his big sister to have a happy birthday that persuaded him to go along with it.
“Y/n.”
Sanemi’s voice gently pulled you from your swirling thoughts.
You blinked, turning your gaze to meet his.
He looked at you with a steady, reassuring gaze, his tone soft yet firm. “It will be okay.”
Without thinking, you reached up, placing your hand over his as it rested on your cheek.
His warmth and touch brought a sense of calm, even as the uncertainty lingered. You smiled, finding a moment of solace in his presence.
❀
You did not sleep at all that night.
The hours dragged on endlessly as you lay in bed, tossing and turning, your mind a whirlwind of worries and doubts. The quiet of the night seemed to amplify every anxious thought, each one more pressing than the last. Every creak of the house, every whisper of the wind, felt like a reminder of the heavy feeling you carried. You tried to close your eyes and drift off, but sleep eluded you, leaving you restless and consumed by the concern for Yuito’s condition.
As dawn approached, you found yourself staring at the ceiling, too exhausted to feel anything but a profound sense of helplessness.
You frustratedly forced yourself out of bed the moment the sun’s rays hit your window. Glancing outside, you were surprised to see…
Genya?
At first, you dismissed it as him possibly going for a morning jog, but something felt... off.
The fear in his eyes was palpable—an expression you had never seen before. He looked genuinely scared and worried, and the sight unsettled you. His presence at this hour was puzzling and raised a knot of anxiety in your chest.
Driven by concern, you immediately bolted from your room, your thoughts scattered, and as you sprinted towards the door, you faintly heard Yuito’s coughing from inside. But the sound faded as you pushed through the door, urgency driving your every step.
Your heart was pounding in your chest as you lost sight of Genya. The world outside seemed chaotic and disorienting, and your mind raced with uncertainty. You didn’t know exactly where you were going, only that you needed to move, to find something or someone to ground you. Each step felt aimless, driven more by instinct than direction, as you scanned the surroundings for any sign of familiarity or safety. The street ahead was still deserted, bathed in the soft golden light of dawn, but it felt wrong—too quiet, too still. You scanned your surroundings frantically, your gaze darting from house to house, searching for any trace of Genya, any sign of life.
Relief washed over you when you spotted Sanemi standing in the middle of the street, the early morning light casting long shadows around him. For a brief moment, your heart steadied, the familiar sight of him giving you something to hold onto.
But then, your eyes shifted, and a shiver crept up your spine.
Someone else was there—someone unfamiliar and terrifying.
As you got closer, your breath caught in your throat.
It was Sanemi's mother, but not the woman you remembered. Her face, twisted and contorted with fury, was almost unrecognizable. Her eyes, once kind, were now wild and brimming with a rage so intense it sent a chill deep into your bones. She moved with a drunken, savage energy, her limbs jerking with a terrifying unpredictability.
Your blood ran cold as she lunged at Sanemi, her movements frantic, her hands clawing at the air like an animal on the hunt. She was no longer the woman who raised him—she was something else entirely, something dangerous.
You watched in horror as her attack landed, two deep gashes carving across Sanemi's face, blood streaming down his skin. He flinched, but his eyes remained locked on her, determined and unyielding. The pain etched into his expression only seemed to sharpen his focus, his resolve hardening before your very eyes.
The world seemed to slow as the scene unfolded. His mother’s erratic movements became more disjointed, her strength faltering for just a second.
In that fleeting moment of staggering confusion, Sanemi acted.
With a swift, almost practiced motion, he gripped the nakiri knife in his hand and struck. The sound of the blade slicing through the air was sharp, final.
You stood rooted to the spot, your heart pounding as the scene before you slowly sank in. Sanemi’s mother—wild, frenzied, and now lifeless—lay before him, her once familiar face twisted in agony. The reality of it was unbearable. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from Sanemi, whose chest heaved as he clutched the knife, blood trickling from the fresh slashes on his face. His expression was unreadable—shock, pain, and something deeper, a grim acceptance of what he had just done.
Sanemi hadn’t yet noticed your presence. His shoulders were tense, every muscle in his body rigid as if he were preparing for another fight. You stayed hidden in the shadows, frozen in place, barely daring to breathe. The intensity of what you had just witnessed hit you like a wave, leaving you trembling as your mind struggled to make sense of it.
Your heart only pounded violently in your chest, each beat loud enough that you feared he might hear it. You clenched your fists, forcing yourself to stay quiet, but the gravity of the situation weighed heavily on your chest.
You felt tears streaming down your face. You were confused and shaken, especially as Sanemi's mother, now lying still, looked more recognizable and human. The fierce rage had left her eyes, and you could see traces of the woman she once was.
There was blood all over the street, staining the ground and splattering everything around it. Sanemi's pure white hair was streaked with red, the stark contrast making the scene even more shocking.
The wounds all over his skin were raw and angry.
And you knew they would surely turn into scars.
From afar, the sound of hurried, uneven footsteps echoed through the tense silence, snapping you from your daze.
Genya.
His movements were frantic, each step weighted with panic, though he hadn’t yet spotted you. As he came into view, you saw the fear etched deep in his wide eyes, now magnified, swallowing him whole. His breath hitched as he stumbled to a stop, body going rigid the instant his gaze locked onto the sight before him.
There he realizes their mother lay crumpled on the ground, unmoving. His expression twisted into a mixture of disbelief and horror. His chest rose and fell rapidly, shallow breaths overtaken by a growing sense of dread. He blinked once, twice, as though his mind refused to accept the reality of the scene.
Then, he whimpered in shock, “Mother!”
Then, his voice broke into a scream. Sanemi stood frozen, and your heart ached at the sight of Genya kneeling beside his mother, his hands trembling as he clutched her lifeless body.
His cries shattered the morning silence, raw and agonizing, as if the sound itself could bring her back. Every desperate plea echoed in the still morning air, each one tearing at your soul, into your chest, making it harder to breathe.
As the first rays of the sun touched all of you from the horizon, you noticed their mother, her skin, once pale and bloodied, slowly disintegrated into ash, drifting into the air with the breeze.
You had never seen anything like it before, and a cold dread settled in your chest. Genya didn’t seem to notice nor care, his cries growing louder and more desperate, refusing to let go.
“Why?!” Genya continues and repeats, “Why did you kill mom?!” He clung to her, as if holding on tighter could somehow keep her from disappearing altogether, as if love alone could defy death.
Sanemi had not moved a muscle, his face pale and eyes wide, unable to process the horror before him. The stark contrast of his blood-streaked white hair against the morning light only added to the surreal scene. You could see the silent anguish in his eyes, the disbelief and helplessness. The world seemed to hold its breath, the tragedy unfolding in agonizing slowness, and all you could do was stand behind them a few feet away, feeling utterly powerless.
“Murderer!” Genya’s voice cut through the silence, raw with pain and fury.
Your heart shattered.
“You murderer!” Genya wailed again, his cries growing louder and more desperate.
You look at Sanemi, and… Without thinking, you turned and ran—the opposite direction, away from the grief, away from the horror— and toward the river where the two of you had spent so many peaceful moments together.
The world around you blurred, your tears distorting the familiar path beneath your feet. Every step felt heavier than the last, your breath ragged as your emotions surged uncontrollably.
When you finally reached the riverbank, your knees buckled, and you collapsed to the ground. The overwhelming storm of emotions forced you to bend over, your body heaving as you vomited, emptying everything you had left. The cool breeze from the river did little to soothe the turmoil inside, but at least here, away from the chaos, you could let your tears flow freely.
You saw it all.
You witnessed and felt their pain ripple through the streets. You had stumbled into the scene where Sanemi had faced their mother, who had become something inhuman. It was clear now—she could have killed Sanemi, and maybe more people if Sanemi hadn’t stopped her.
Stopped her by… killing her.
And Genya’s cries were unlike anything you had ever witnessed before.
You felt the heavy burden settle into Sanemi’s heart, the crushing weight of his brother’s accusation of murder. The pain was palpable, an emotional wound that seemed to cut even deeper than the physical ones.
And you saw Sanemi’s eyes, which had once been so full of life...
As the horror of the situation sank in, you felt your own strength wane. The emotional weight was too much, and the world around you began to blur. Your vision narrowed, and with one last glimpse of the scene—Sanemi’s hollow eyes and the bloody street—you collapsed into unconsciousness, the world fading to black as your own body succumbed to the gravity of what you had witnessed.
❀
The world bled back into focus in fragments—the soft rustle of grass brushing against your skin, the warmth of dappled sunlight breaking through the trees, the distant murmur of the river threading through the hush of the afternoon. It should have been peaceful.
But It wasn’t.
The icy dread still clung to you, coiling around your chest. You blinked, your vision sharpening as you slowly pushed yourself up, your limbs sluggish, as though weighed down by the heaviness in your heart. The river whispered, its steady flow an indifferent lull, but it did little to soothe the storm raging inside you.
And then you saw him.
Sanemi sat just a few feet away, his back stiff, his posture rigid as if bracing for an unseen blow. His gaze was fixed on the water, unblinking, lost in something deeper than thought. He looked almost statuesque—like he had been carved from grief itself.
You should have felt relieved to see him. Instead, your stomach twisted.
The air between you crackled with unease, thick with the remnants of what had been done, what could never be undone. The fear came quick and sharp, tightening around your ribs before you even realized it was there. You shifted instinctively, putting space between you, a quiet retreat.
You knew what he had done—what he had been forced to do. You understood that. And yet, now, with him so close, his pain thrumming just beneath the surface, it was... too much.
His presence, once a source of comfort, now felt like an unbearable weight pressing down on you—and you hated it.
You needed to leave.
But just as you braced yourself to stand, to put as much distance between you as possible, Sanemi’s voice cut through the silence.
"Genya left me..."
The words hung in the air. Simple, yet devastating.
The words were a confession of a loss deeper than any physical wound, a declaration of a fracture in the very fabric of his world. You paused, turning back to him, your fear giving way to a deep, aching sorrow.
In that moment, the need to escape was replaced by an urgent desire to offer some form of comfort or support. So you moved closer to him, the fear still present but overshadowed by the fact that he is your best friend.
You knelt beside him, trying to gauge his state more clearly. His face was marked by the trauma of the events, but it was evident he had tried to wash off the blood that once stained his skin. The traces of it remained, a stark reminder of the violence and the agony he had endured. His hands were still smeared with crimson, the blood a haunting echo of the struggle he had faced.
Without a second thought, you reached for the sleeve of your pajamas and tore it off, the fabric soft and familiar against your fingertips. You dipped the torn sleeve into the cool, flowing water of the river, wringing it out to ensure it was damp but not soaking.
Just as you were about to begin cleaning up the blood stains on his skin, Sanemi’s spoke, strained.
“Y/n... My mother... She's gone.”
His words trembled, and he looked as though he was on the verge of breaking down. The weight of his loss, the magnitude of the void left by his mother’s departure, was almost too much to bear, even for you.
Though his eyes remained dry, there was an emptiness in them that was even more painful to witness than tears.
You swallowed hard, your chest tight as you struggled to find the right response. You searched for something to say—anything—but no words could make this better.
So you did the only thing you could. Without thinking, you wrapped your arms around him in a tight, comforting embrace. You held him close, your own emotions spilling over as you offered whatever solace you could in that moment.
Sanemi’s breath hitched against you, his silent grief expressed in shuddering gasps. He didn’t cry out, didn’t scream, but the agony radiating from him was overwhelming. His body trembled. Your arms tightened around him as though you could shield him from the crushing weight of guilt that was consuming him, and in that moment, you even wished you could take it from him, even if only for a little while.
“It’s my fault,” he whispered, his voice breaking under the strain. “They’re both gone… They’re all gone, Y/n.”
You gently pulled back a little, holding his face in your hands and looking into his eyes with as much reassurance as you could muster. “It is not your fault," you whispered, shaking your head, your voice steady despite the tremor in your heart.
His eyes, hollow and lost, searched yours, but the weight of his grief was still too heavy for him to fully grasp your words.
As you looked at him, the bloodstains smeared across his face broke your heart a little more, making you feel a desperate need to care for him. Without a second thought, you dipped the cloth back into the water, wringing it out before gently pressing it against his skin to clean the dried blood from his skin. Your movements were slow and deliberate, trying to be as gentle as possible. The cool water met his warm, trembling skin, offering a small measure of relief. Every stroke of the cloth was a quiet act of care, an attempt to wash away not just the blood but the overwhelming weight of guilt that clung to him.
“It’s not your fault,” you repeated softly, hoping your words would seep through his anguish.
You could feel him gradually beginning to calm, if only slightly. You remained quiet, because you knew that not even your words could seep through his anguish.
You only focused on your task, letting the silence between you be a space for his emotions to ebb and flow. The only sounds were the soft lapping of the river and the occasional rustle of leaves in the breeze.
As you worked, you glanced up at him occasionally, ensuring he knew you were there, present and supportive. His muscles, once tense and rigid, slowly started to relax under your gentle touch.
After a while, you finished cleaning most of the blood from his skin, though some stubborn stains remained, still faintly visible. You stayed close, offering him the silent reassurance of your presence. The weight of the events still hung heavily, but in this moment, there was peace.
Sanemi looked at you, his eyes still hollow, but deep within them, there was a faint flicker of gratitude, almost imperceptible but there.
You were all that he had now. But you didn’t know that. You didn’t know the bloodshed that had taken place in the Shinazugawa home, the horrors that had unfolded in his world.
And with that thought, something shifted in him. His body grew tense, his jaw clenched, his fists balled tightly, knuckles whitening. His breathing grew ragged again, lips trembling as if trying to contain an unspeakable truth. His anxiety was palpable, crashing through the peace that had settled between you both, suffocating the moment. You could feel it, see it—the quiet storm brewing inside him, threatening to tear him apart.
“Sanemi,” you said softly, reaching out to touch his arm. Your voice was gentle, meant to soothe. “It's okay. I’m here with you.”
His eyes darted around, unfocused, as if he was seeing the horrors of the event all over again. You squeezed his arm a little tighter, grounding him in the present. “Look at me,” you urged gently. “Stay with me.”
He meets your gaze again. The intensity of his emotions threatened to overwhelm him, but your steady presence seemed to provide a lifeline for him.
He took a shaky breath, his chest rising unevenly as he fought to steady himself. His fists remained clenched, knuckles white with the effort of holding everything in. So, gently, you reached out, prying one hand open with careful insistence before threading your fingers through his.
The warmth of your touch seemed to ground him, a silent reminder that he wasn’t alone.
For a moment, he was still—rigid, uncertain. Then, with a quiet exhale, he turned his hand over and grasped yours with both of his, holding on as if letting go would send him spiraling. His grip was firm, desperate even, but you didn’t pull away.
"I'm not a murderer... am I? Y/n?" His voice was barely more than a whisper, filled with uncertainty and a lot of pain.
You shook your head slowly, your gaze steady, unwavering. “Sanemi-kun,” you said, your voice quiet but firm, each word carrying the weight of conviction. “You made an impossible choice. But that doesn’t make you a murderer. It makes you someone who was forced to bear a terrible burden—one no one should ever have to carry.”
His breath hitched, his fingers trembling against yours. It was like he was bracing himself for rejection, for blame—anything but understanding. This made you tighten your grip on his hand, squeezing just enough to remind him that you were still there.
“If no one believes you,” you whispered, “then I do.” A pause, then softer, steadier—“You have me.”
Tears finally welled up in his eyes, but he quickly wipes them off.
Then, a familiar voice called out your name. You turned around to see your mother standing there, her face a mask of horror.
“Mother!” you exclaimed, standing up and running toward her. You wrapped your arms around her in a tight hug, relief mingled with worry. She hesitated for a moment before returning the embrace, her arms feeling cold and stiff.
“Mother! Sanemi-kun is hurt, we need to help him—”
Your mother’s eyes remained fixed on Sanemi, and there was an unmistakable edge of fear in her gaze. It was as if the sight of him was more than she could handle. “Y/n… your father needs you home. Now. We’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
Her words sliced through the quiet, unraveling the peace you’d been trying to hold onto. You felt it slip through your fingers as you turned back to Sanemi. His brow furrowed, eyes flickering between you and your mother, confusion and unease shadowing his face.
“What’s wrong?” you asked, a tremor creeping into your voice. “Is Yuito okay?”
Your mother’s expression tightened, her face pale with worry. “Y/n, we need to go.”
“How about Sanemi-“ You barely had time to turn back to Sanemi before your mother’s grip clamped around your wrist, yanking you toward her. You stumbled, gasping at the force of it.
The sudden movement made Sanemi snap to attention, his body tensing as he shot to his feet.
“Y/n,” Sanemi spoke, his voice filled with concern, "Is everything okay—“
“You!” your mother spat, her voice cutting through the air. The sheer hostility in her tone made you flinch. You turned to her, brows knitting together in confusion, but she was already moving—already tearing you away. “You can see her later,” she hissed, her voice shaking with something that wasn’t just urgency but fear. “Y-Y/n’s father needs her home. Now.”
Sanemi didn’t move. He just stood there, his jaw tightening, his gaze fixed on your mother with sharp suspicion. His hands curled into fists at his sides.
His eyes flicked to you, searching, questioning. His expression said it all—he could sense something was wrong. And yet, you couldn’t answer him. The weight of your mother’s grip on your arm, the tremor in her voice, the demand in her eyes—it left no room for hesitation.
Your heart ached with the conflict of wanting to stay but also needing to understand what was happening with your family. “Sanemi-kun, please wait for me... I’ll come back, I promise.”
“Y/n…” His voice cracked, and your heart broke at the sound.
Without a second thought, you ran towards him, ignoring your mother’s frantic cries. He was your best friend, and in that moment, nothing else mattered.
You wrapped your arms around him tightly, feeling the roughness of his skin against yours as held his hands in yours, trying to convey the depth of your emotions. His grip was strong but trembling, reflecting his own fear and desperation.
“It will be okay,” you said, repeating his words from the night before. “Wait for me here, alright?”
Sanemi just looked at you, barely nodding.
Your mother tugged at your arm, more insistently this time. “Y/n, we need to leave now!”
Reluctantly, you allowed her to lead you away, your mind racing with questions and concerns. As you walked away, you looked back at Sanemi one last time, his figure by the river growing smaller with each step. The determination in your heart remained strong, a silent vow to return as soon as you could.
Tears blurred your vision, but you wiped them away, steeling yourself for whatever awaited at home. Your mother’s grip on your arm was tight, her fear palpable, but your thoughts were still with Sanemi, hoping he could hold on just a little longer.
As you hurried back with your mother, you couldn’t shake the image of Sanemi standing alone by the river, his eyes searching for the reassurance you had tried to give.
The weight of the night’s events pressed heavily on your shoulders, but you knew you had to be strong—for your family,
and for Sanemi.
❀