Work Text:
1
Saku screamed. The pink Sanrio bento box slipped from their fingers. Sai watched pieces of fried chicken—lovingly handmade by Mrs. Hagiwara—dance and glide across his bedroom floor. After all, there was not much else he could do with his pants down, his tongue tied, his arm outstretched in the universal sign of Let Me Explain.
But Saku did not let him explain. They took one look at his sweaty hand and bolted out of the room. Sai heard them scramble down the stairs—likely on their fours—and out of his house.
It was only then that he realized the porn was still playing. On his laptop screen, the petite actress with short hair was now expertly blowing one dude, jerking off two others, and getting pounded by two more from behind. He slammed the laptop shut and buried his face in his hands.
The next day at school, giggles and pointing fingers followed him wherever he went, and when he passed Ishikawa in the hallway, the infamous manslut gave him a wink and two thumbs up.
“What the hell’s going on with everyone?”
Ryuu gave him a knowing smile that made Sai want to punch his beautiful face. Then, as if satisfied with Sai’s reaction, Ryuu began to speak.
“Sai, I am in no place to judge your choice of entertainment. I personally enjoy it every now and then—sex positivity and everything—but I do prefer the company of real people. I think everyday might be too much. As your friend, I must admit that I am both amused and concerned.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Saku told everyone that you have a porn addiction and jerk off to hardcore porn every single day.”
Sai wanted to grab onto Saku’s slim shoulders and thrash them till they cried.
Saku must have been avoiding him. During lunch break, Sai stormed all their hideouts on campus, and not once did he spot the tiny figure hunching over their bento like a giddy goblin. Nor were they at the after-school literature club meeting—part of him was shocked that they passed on ogling Haku.
In the end, he gave up and went home.
The silver lining was that his legal guardians were at work and would not be back until late night. Good—he had enough uncomfortable encounters for today, and all he wanted to do was to scream into his pillow or maybe jerk off.
So imagine his despair when he found Saku standing arm-crossed in his bedroom, their golden eyes glowing with rage.
2
Sai’s childhood memories had Saku all over them. Chasing off bullies, holding Saku whenever they cried, carrying them home on his back when scraped knees reduced them to a sobbing mess—these things made him feel special, because adults said that Saku was a very special child, and he thought by being their protector he too could become special, more special, more lovable than an orphaned boy living with foster parents who were never home.
Which was the reason why Mrs. Hagiwara had always welcomed him into their house and stuffed him with her delicious cooking. A fair compensation for the role of being Saku’s friend—only friend.
And then, puberty started.
Sleepovers came to a stop. Sai did not complain, because he too had discovered the curious effects Saku’s changing body had on his psyche. There were many mornings where he was too afraid to look them in the eye because of the dreams he had hours ago. He began to avoid Saku’s hugs, because the sensation of their breasts pressing against his chest burned him, and he did not want to make his long, hot nights even longer.
So he turned to porn. A quick relief from confusion and embarrassment, in the secrecy of his bedroom, though at this point it was the opposite of a secret.
Why did Saku freak out like that?
It was certainly not a childish aversion to sex. After the two got into the literature club and Haku came into the picture, Saku’s equally-hormone-addled mind imploded beneath the weight of its creativity. One of their many creations was a poem about wanting to suck dick—Haku’s, as anyone could see—which made it to the quarterly literature club anthology. Haku must have pulled some strings—or some muscles, if he did give Saku a slice of his time.
Then why should Saku be upset at him for watching porn?
3
“You are doing it every day, aren’t you!”
Once again, Sai was amazed at the inner workings of Saku’s mind.
“I thought that was what you told everyone!”
“Answer me, Sai! Are you doing it every day or not?”
To deny it would only make him look more suspicious.
“Whether I do it every day or not—how’s that any of your business?”
Running into your best friend masturbating certainly leaves an unsavory mental image, but seeing his dick could not have been that traumatizing, right?
“I-I don’t think you should be looking at porn!”
“I don’t think you should be saying that when you are busy being Haku’s cum bucket!”
He felt regret the moment the words left his mouth.
Saku stared at him blankly. Shit! He knew from experience that in seconds the tears would come, so he covered the distance between them and held them against his chest. Too late—he felt a patch of wetness forming on the front of his shirt.
“I am sorry. I’m so sorry,” he mumbled.
He helped them sit down in his bed and held them in his arms. After some time, the crying slowed down and Saku tried to talk between tiny hiccups.
“I-I don’t know why I’m like this,” they said.
Sai did not know either—even God Himself might not.
“Uh… Look, Saku. I am sorry for what I said just now. I was being really dumb…Also I am sorry about the porn I was watching. I know it can be a little upsetting to some—”
“I just don’t like the idea,” Saku rubbed their eyes with the back of their hand, “of you looking at other people in that way,”
Why? It can’t be that… He tried not to think too much about it—he was too used to disappointments, and he knew very well that Saku was the last person on earth he should expect anything from, be it an ounce of their love or something more.
But Saku’s hand was on his crotch.
“Sai,” they said, their voice distant and soft, “you are hard.”
4
He watched Saku kneel between his legs. They unzipped his pants and pulled them down to below his knees.
They studied his cock for a moment.
“It looks…kind of like you,” they said.
Sai had so many questions—but those could come later.
They began to stroke his dick, first with one hand, then with both, and soon his dick got even harder under their touch. He thought about how nice those delicate fingers looked around his dick. Once Saku’s mouth was on his cock, however, all thoughts left his mind and all he could feel were the jolts of pleasure. He had to close his eyes because he was sure that if they made eye contact, he would have come on the spot.
Soon he was close. A voice in the back of his mind told him that he should be considerate and not come in their mouth, so he nudged their shoulders.
“That’s…that’s enough,” he said.
“Ah, I see,” they said, looking up at him from between his legs, their face slightly flushed.
They got up, went over to their school bag on the floor, and fumbled through its content. For a second, Sai was worried that they were going to chuck a textbook at him. Instead they thrusted a small tin foil square into his hand. He stared at it and wondered why they gave him a ramen seasoning packet.
Hold on, this is—
He looked up, just in time to see Saku’s skirt drop to the floor and pool around their feet.
5
There he was, lying in his bed and staring into the ceiling, eyes wide in both terror and awe from the sex earlier. Today he learned a thing or two about anatomy, as well as the fact that porn mileage does not count towards sexual experience. Who knew that Saku, the one that he had protected all his life, would be the person to induct him into the secret society of adulthood that he had longed for.
The two of them even came at the same time. He thought it only happened in porn. After they came, the two lay panting next to each other for a minute or two. Then, as quickly as Saku had shed their clothes, they put them back on.
“Shit! I’m late for dinner!”
Just like that, they were gone, hair tousled, body still dripping in sex and sweat. He did not even get to offer them to shower at his house.
6
“You were right for saying that, Sai.”
“I’m so sorry. I didn't mean it—I was really overwhelmed.”
“It’s okay Sai. You can probably tell already. I’m so messed up.”
The two of them were in his bedroom after school again, but this time Sai was in his chair while Saku sat in his bed—he was totally not expecting to get laid again, or was he?
“Sorry for watching porn,” he said.
Saku stared at him in disbelief. Then they burst out laughing.
“Sai, it’s not like we live in the Taishō era—it’s not a crime to watch porn,”
Then why did you tell the entire school like I killed someone?
As if reading his mind, Saku sighed.
“When I saw you doing that, I just panicked. I kind of always assumed that you would be with me no matter what, so suddenly I realized that you might be…interested in being with other people, I just—”
“Went bananas. Bonkers. Lost your goddamn mind.”
“Exactly!”
“But…what about Haku? I thought you really wanted to…get it on with him.”
Their eyes widened.
“Wait, Sai. Do you actually not know?”
“What do you mean?” He tried to sound nonchalant.
“I thought that’s why you called me a cum bucket!”
He felt dizzy.
“So, yeah…Haku and I have been fooling around a lot. But the thing is—I also really like doing this with you, and I don’t want you to do it with other people—”
He covered his face with his hands.
“It doesn’t make any sense,” he repeated the words over and over again.
“No, it doesn’t and I’m really sorry, but—”
They pointed a finger towards him.
“—you are hard again.”
Sai looked down and indeed he was. Smiling, Saku patted the spot next to them in his bed, exactly the way a teenager pretending to be a seasoned prostitute would.
7
Saku smiled lazily in his arms. Suddenly, they had a serious look on their face.
“Sai, you know what? You and I can have a threesome with Haku—”
“No!”
“Sheesh Sai. You are such a killjoy.”
Sai was perfectly content with being one.