Chapter Text
Chapter One: (16 years ago)
Donghae was wandering around Venice Beach, camera in hand, when he noticed a very lost looking young man about his age struggling with what appeared to be a guidebook. Lifting the camera, he snapped a quick picture, smiling as he thought of the multitude of tourists who came here every day. He was about to turn away and continue meandering around, looking for good shots, when the young man suddenly lifted his head, glancing around with big wide eyes full of confusion and a bit of fear, and happened to look straight at Donghae.
He was Asian, that much was evident in his large, single-lidded eyes. He must not be a native, because anyone who knew LA wouldn’t need a guide. He was also kind of cute, in a geeky, touristy way. Donghae couldn’t help but smile at the young man, and after a moment of shock, the other took a quick look around, to make sure it was he being smiled at, and gave a weak, lopsided grin in return.
Putting his camera strap over his shoulder, Donghae started walking toward the stranger. His parents would have probably thrown a fit if they knew he was out here talking to people he didn’t know. Heck, they would throw a fit just knowing he was on Venice Beach alone, not that he hadn’t been here a hundred times before. His parents liked to throw out rules and tell him what to do, but the thing was, they were never around enough, and didn’t pay enough attention, to have even the barest hint of what their middle child was up to.
“Hi,” Donghae said in English, not sure what language the other might speak. “Are you lost?”
A pink tongue snuck out to wet what Donghae noticed were a pair of rather lush lips. Then the other man shrugged, and in a thick accent replied, “English… no good.”
It had been a while since Donghae had returned home. But there was something familiar in that accent. Enough that it prompted him to question, “Are you Korean?”
The dark eyes got even wider, a spark of happiness making the man’s entire face glow.
“Yes! Korean!” he replied in their native language. “You speak Korean?”
“I’m a little rusty,” Donghae smiled, answering the same way. “But I think I remember enough. Are you lost?”
“Maybe?” he seemed hesitant, and Donghae wondered if perhaps this man was a bit more cautious of where he went alone. He should be. Venice Beach was safe enough during the daytime, but at night things could get a little crazy. “I wanted to go sightseeing. They told me this place was interesting.”
“Sure,” Donghae nodded. “It’s fun. Are you here by yourself though?”
“Why?” Caution appeared once again in the almond eyes.
“You should be careful. Your bag for instance? Keep it close. Someone could snag it off you in a heartbeat and you’d never see it again. Hopefully you don’t have any important documents in there?”
Now the expression turned to alarm, and a moment later the young man dove into his bag, rummaging around for something. When his questing hand found it, he sighed with relief, pulling out his passport.
“Hide that in your underwear or something,” Donghae cautioned.
“My underwear?”
“It’s the safest place,” Donghae grinned. “Unless you’re planning to go swimming.”
“No, I… I wasn’t planning to. I just wanted to see the ocean. It’s pretty here.”
“Beautiful,” Donghae agreed, thinking of the photos he had just taken. The longer he looked at the young man in front of him, the more he felt that the beach wasn’t the only pretty thing. “I’m Aiden.”
“Hyukjae,” the other man said with a moment of hesitation, giving a Korean name.
Donghae kicked himself. He should have used his birth name. It might have put the other man at ease. He had been in America for so long now it was second nature to use his English one. In LA everyone knew him as Aiden. Even his parents called him Aiden. Probably the only people who still remembered his real name were his brothers and their grandparents back in Korea.
“What brings you to LA?” he asked casually.
“Work. I hope,” Hyukjae admitted. “I came here for an audition.”
There was a momentary flash of acid panic, the word audition churning up all kinds of nasty memories for Donghae. “Really?” he asked, swallowing the bile, “what for?”
“I’m a dancer. I came to try out for a choreographer. His company works with some of the biggest stars. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do, you know?”
“Oh yeah?” It was a relief. He wasn’t a wannabe actor. But a dancer? That was cool. Donghae knew a few dancers and they were all really devoted to what they did. Giving Hyukjae a once-over, he decided that he had a nice body for dancing. He was slim and rather short compared to a lot of the people he was going to meet in America. But Donghae liked to dance himself, and he had been told that taller dancers often had trouble with the more fluid styles of modern dance. “You’re that good?”
“I… I think so. I’ve been training for five years back home. A scout saw me dance in a showcase and offered me the opportunity to audition here. They must have thought I was good enough.”
“That’s cool,” Donghae nodded. “I’m sure you’ll do great.”
Hyukjae didn’t seem convinced. He’d been eyeing Donghae’s clothes and general appearance while they were talking, and now was fidgeting a little, plucking at his own as if worried they were strange. Which they were. While he was cute in a dorky sort of way, Hyukjae looked very much like a Korean high school student attempting to appear hip. He stood out like a sore thumb with a horrible shag haircut that was at least ten years out of date.
“Can I ask you a question?” Hyukjae started.
“Sure, ask away,” Donghae replied cheerfully.
“How old are you?”
“Me?” Donghae asked with surprise, before remembering that he looked much younger than he was. “I just turned 19. What about you?”
“You’re 19?” Hyukjae was shocked. Not unexpected, but still, Donghae wondered if he was ever going to outgrow his babyface. “Me too.”
“Awesome!” Donghae replied happily, remembering how age-oriented things were in Korea. “So, we can be friends, right? Because we’re the same age?”
“Are you… are you Korean?”
“Oh, yeah, I was born there. But I moved here when I was still a kid. I have family there, so we go for visits. But my parents and my brother all work here now, so…”
“That explains a lot,” Hyukjae laughed suddenly, exposing his gums and crinkling his eyes in a way that Donghae thought was adorable. “You can’t imagine how shocked I was when someone suddenly started speaking Korean to me. You don’t look Korean at all.”
“Thanks, I guess,” Donghae shrugged. “I suppose I’m Americanized. Living in LA can do that to you.”
“Do you like it here?”
Did he? There were times when Donghae was excessively glad for all the opportunities his family, and himself, had been given by living here. At the same time, he had a lot of regrets. Having come here as a young boy he hadn’t really understood that childhood wasn’t the same for everyone else. His mother had somehow gotten him a role in a big Hollywood production through her connections in the industry. With extensive tutoring, he had picked up English quickly and gone on to feature as the token cute Asian boy in a number of movies and TV shows. He had a baby face – still, much to his dismay – and a charming smile, and was able to cry on command. But puberty hadn’t been kind. While he hadn’t grown much, also something he hadn’t given up hope on though he was nearing 20, he had experienced all the other unsavory changes, including a much deeper voice and a minefield of facial acne. Acting roles had dried up, despite the numerous auditions his mother kept forcing him to attend.
In the end, it hadn’t mattered much to him. Because when he didn’t have to devote his life to the cameras, he had finally realized how much more there was to see and do. Instead of being in front of the lens, he had fallen in love with being behind it. Photography was his passion now. He loved taking pictures and couldn’t wait to start traveling around the world to capture new images.
It was ironic that at his last audition – a total failure, by the way, due equally to the casting director’s disdain and Donghae’s horrible performance – that his baby brother had been the one to be given a role. Kyuhyun had never had the slightest interest in acting before, but he was young and cute and spoke English like a native with barely a trace of an accent since he’d practically spent his entire life here in America.
With Kyu the focus of attention, that meant Donghae could finally relax and slip into obscurity. And since their mother was their manager, and always chased after the best opportunity for fame and fortune for her offspring, she had basically ignored her firstborn to give everything to the second. Did it hurt a little? Of course. But the pressure was off, for the first time he could ever remember, and at least he was able to provide some guidance to his younger brother that would help him cope and adjust to the life he was now living.
It had also allowed him to finally get closer to his older brother, Kangin. They were only three years apart, but it was Kangin’s father who had married Donghae’s mother. When Donghae moved to America to act, Kangin had remained in Korea with his birth mother. Only when he became a teenager and started acting out in ways she couldn’t handle, had he been shipped off to live with his father and continue his schooling here in LA. In the beginning, Donghae had thought Kangin resented him for stealing his father away. But once they were finally able to get to know one another, he realized that his older brother already knew their father was a lost cause. He just wanted a sibling. And when he was kept away from not only his stepbrother, but the younger half-brother they now shared, it hurt him deeply. Kangin was loud and rough and liked to cause trouble, but he adored his little brothers and would have gladly stepped in front of a speeding car to protect either of them.
It was depressing when he returned to Korea to do his military service after finishing high school. But he’d promised to come back, intending to go to college in America when he was done. Donghae was counting the days.
He realized, abruptly, that he had left Hyukjae’s question hanging in the air as he thought about his own past and his experiences in America. Quickly, he blurted out, “I guess it’s what you make of it. I don’t mind, but I’d like to travel and see some more of the world now that I’m older.”
Hyukjae gave him a smile, then randomly blurted out, “You look really cool.”
“I do?” The praise tickled him. While puberty had done a number on his appearance and his self-esteem, the last few years had made up for it somewhat. Donghae was still usually one of the shortest men in any room and no one ever believed him when he told people his age. But his skin had cleared up completely, and aside from a few tiny scars, his face was flawless. He was popular in high school and liked to follow the newest trends in hair and clothing and always tried to look good in it. A petty jab, perhaps, at the casting directors that had told him one too many times that he had lost his cuteness and was no longer worth hiring. “Thanks.”
“I look stupid, don’t I?”
“No?” Donghae was shocked. Hyukjae’s style was out of date for LA, but he was still cute. Cuter by the minute. “Why?”
“You think you could give me some tips? I want to fit in here. I’m waiting for a call to go for my final audition, and I want to look really good, you know? I don’t want them to think I’m some kind of naïve kid. I want to look sexy.”
“You think I’m sexy?” Donghae latched onto the end of the statement, secretly delighted by the idea. He liked boys. He guessed he always had. And while he had played around a lot in high school, he had only ever been with one person sexually. Someone older. Whom he’d met on the set of his brother’s TV show. Someone he had quickly suspected liked Donghae because he looked younger than he was, which was both disturbing and disappointing. Hyukjae, however, was his age, and very cute, and he really wouldn’t mind getting to know him better.
“Well,” Hyukjae squirmed awkwardly, “I mean, you just look cool, you know? Like you belong here.”
“If you don’t mind hanging out with me, I can absolutely give you some tips,” Donghae grinned.
“I just… I didn’t bring much with me. And I don’t have much money,” Hyukjae offered carefully. “I didn’t know how long I would have to stay here. My parents weren’t really happy about it, but I earned the money for the plane ticket myself, and…”
“It’s no problem! You could even borrow some of my things if you wanted. We’re about the same size.”
“Really?” Hyukjae seemed absolutely stunned, staring at Donghae as if he had offered to give him a million dollars or something.
“Of course. It’s not easy getting a toe in the door here. But if you’re that good of a dancer, you’re already ahead of the pack. Making you look good can only help, right? I don’t mind.”
“That…” Donghae swore there were tears welling in the other man’s eyes as he struggled to speak, “that would be amazing. Thank you.”
“Sure,” he replied happily.
It really wasn’t a big deal. He had no plans for the day anyway. And Hyukjae was cute. Even if they did nothing more than become friends, it was always nice to know new people. Venturing to America on his own, with nothing more than a few dollars and a dream, was courageous. If Donghae could help him out, even in such a small way, it would be a day well spent. Besides, maybe someday, if Hyukjae became a famous star, Donghae could brag that he discovered him first. The very idea made him chuckle sweetly and the dazzled expression on Hyukjae’s face filled him with pride.
“How did you get here anyway? Did you rent a car?”
“I don’t know how to drive,” Hyukjae admitted.
“What?” he almost yelled, the very idea shocking. “You’re going to need to learn right away. It’s not like Seoul. Everyone drives here. You can’t get anywhere without a car.”
“Yeah?” Hyukjae’s face fell.
“I can teach you how to drive, too. My older brother taught me. I’ve had my license for three years already. Come on, we can walk back to my car. Unless you want to spend more time here at the beach?”
“Nah,” Hyukjae gave him a lopsided grin. “The beach isn’t going anywhere. I can always come back.”
“Perfect,” Donghae couldn’t stop smiling. “I’m much better than a guidebook anyway. Come on, let’s show you LA and get you looking sexy, too.”
Hyukjae snorted with laughter, clearly not believing it was possible. But he fell into step beside Donghae as he started walking the path back to where his car was parked.
The days that followed were some of the most enjoyable of Donghae’s young life. With no parents interested enough to monitor his activities, he was able to devote his time to dragging Hyukjae around LA and improving his image.
Despite no longer working as an actor, Donghae had lots of friends and connections in the industry, and his parents’ names opened doors that he might not be able to open on his own.
After taking Hyukjae to lunch at an outdoor grill on the strip, he made a few phone calls, and booked an appointment with one of the nicest stylists he knew.
Ignoring his new friend’s protests, Donghae happily forked over the money to pay for a new hairstyle. Hyukjae’s hair had been poorly cut and badly colored before he walked in the door, but when he stepped outside, Donghae thought he looked like a star. His shag hairdo had been cut and straightened, the formerly mismatched streaks of orange and brown were now bleached and surrounding his face, framing his strong jaw and highlighting the pouty lips Donghae was already harboring a strong attraction to kiss.
His stylist, Caroline, had also applied some light makeup to Hyukjae’s eyes, instructing him on how to do it himself and preparing a small kit of essentials that Donghae secretly paid for as well. Aside from the fact that he himself now felt even younger in comparison to the sleek and sexy man who stared at his reflection in awe, Donghae couldn’t have been happier at the result of his actions.
And Hyukjae wouldn’t stop thanking him for the kindness.
Of course, with the new hairstyle, Hyukjae needed new clothes. And Donghae had closets full of the latest styles, many of them with the price tags still on them.
The afternoon was spent at Donghae’s home, with Hyukjae marveling over the expensive décor and trendy gadgetry, while Donghae rummaged through his clothing, picking out all the things he thought his new friend could wear better than he did.
By the time dinner rolled around, Hyukjae had tried on at least thirty outfits, and while he said he could only accept a few things until he could somehow pay Donghae back, the younger made note of exactly which pieces brought a wistful glance to the other boy’s eyes and set them aside carefully. He would give them to Hyukjae later, when he wasn’t already overwhelmed by the unbridled generosity of a near-stranger.
The thing was, by the time they sat down to dinner, again at a restaurant Donghae had chosen, it didn’t feel like they were strangers anymore. While their upbringing had little in common, they were still the same age and liked many of the same things. They had talked about music and movies and video games, comics and school subjects. They even talked, eventually, about dating.
It was at that point, for the first time, that Donghae felt the need to hold back. Because Hyukjae, while admitting to a few lightweight romances during high school, was clearly a virgin, and probably liked girls judging by his stories. Donghae wasn’t necessarily ashamed of his past experiences, but he was cautious about getting into too much detail.
Still, just in case there was a chance, he offhandedly remarked, “I like guys more than girls.”
“You… oh?”
“Does it bother you? I’m not trying to make a move on you or anything, so don’t worry about that. I just wanted to let you know.”
“It doesn’t… it doesn’t bother me,” Hyukjae said quietly, returning his attention to his food as his cheeks flushed pink.
“I know it’s frowned upon back in Korea, but it’s really no big deal here, especially in LA. You’re going to meet a lot of gay men, especially in the entertainment industry. So just… well, a word of caution, I guess. You’re a really nice guy and very polite, which is a good thing. But some people might take it as something else.”
“Okay.”
“I mean, girls will hit on you, too. People in general are a lot bolder and more forward here compared to what you’re used to. But, you know, you can always ask me if you aren’t sure about something. If… well, if you still want to hang around me now that you know.”
“Why wouldn’t I?” Hyukjae asked with confusion. “You’ve been super nice to me, and… well, you’re really cool.”
“Thanks,” Donghae smiled warmly, relaxing again as the small ember of hope flared up. “Keep saying that and I might start hitting on you after all.”
“Maybe you should try it,” Hyukjae blurted out, biting his lip as he saw the way Donghae’s eyes widened in surprise. “You know, as practice. So I know what I should look out for.”
“Right,” Donghae laughed a bit shakily. “Of course.”
“So do you…” Hyukjae started, only to be startled into silence by the ringing of Donghae’s cell phone.
Pulling it from his pants pocket, Donghae glanced at the screen, ready to curse whoever was interrupting his moment. He saw his brother’s English name and let out a sigh.
“Hang on, I have to take this.” Turning away slightly, he answered in English, “What’s up bro?”
“ Can you pick me up from the studio?”
“I guess so. Why? Where’s mom?”
“Who knows. She had some appointment and said she would send the driver back later, but she’s not answering her phone and I don’t want to call a car. The last guy the service sent kept telling me how his daughter was a big fan of mine. He wanted me to talk to her on the phone. It fucking sucked. Trying to pressure a kid into making fan calls. I just wanted to sleep, you know? And I had to keep my guard up all the way home because I was afraid he would kidnap me and take me home with him or something.”
“Of course, I’ll come get you, Marcus. Just tell me the time, okay?”
Donghae would, and did, do everything for his little brother. He adored him, even if he was an evil little shit for no reason sometimes. At thirteen, Marcus was already nearing the age when Donghae had reached retirement. But the younger of them had been blessed with a relatively easy puberty so far, and having grown up in the industry, he’d learned at a much younger age how to deal with the hazards of Hollywood. Still, it was typical of their mother to do something like this. Abandoning her child at the studio while she networked, leaving them to deal with the adult world on their own when they should be relaxing after a busy day of work. Juggling the responsibilities of being a child actor while also maintaining schoolwork and some semblance of a normal life was difficult. The numerous examples of burnout in the industry, young people past their prime for roles, turning to drugs and other unsavory habits in a desperation to feel a hint of their former glory, was appalling.
He would never let his brother go down that road, even if he had to drag him away from Hollywood himself. He blessed his lucky stars for surviving it as well as he had.
“Sorry,” he turned back to Hyukjae after establishing a time and place to meet his brother. “I need to pick up my brother in a while.”
“It’s okay. I’ve taken enough of your time already.”
“What do you mean?” Donghae asked in shock. “I loved spending time with you! This has all been so much fun.”
“Really?”
“For sure!”
“I’m sure you have more fun stuff you could be doing than babysitting me, though.”
“Babysitting?” Donghae snorted. “You’re the sexiest baby I’ve ever seen, then.”
He had been joking around, but the nervous reaction from Hyukjae made him realize what he said. And that his flirting game might not be as lame as he thought. Or maybe it was just this person in particular who appreciated his flirting. Either way, he would keep it in mind for another day.
“Anyway, I can drop you off at wherever you’re staying if you want. I don’t have to get him for an hour.”
“You don’t have to—”
“Hyukjae,” Donghae scolded. “I’m not going to abandon you in the middle of LA after all this. Do you even know how to get back from here?”
“I’m sure I could find a cab, or—”
“Let’s go. I’m taking you. No objections.” He softened the command with a laugh, and after a moment, Hyukjae nodded shyly.
He really was too polite. If he wasn’t careful, he would be eaten alive here in Hollywood. If he did get the job he was trying out for, maybe Donghae would end up knowing someone in the company. A friend of a friend of a friend, or whatever. At least that way he could help Hyukjae out and someone might be able to keep an eye on him. Young people being taken advantage of wasn’t merely a rumor, it was a fact. Donghae and his brother had been lucky, as their parents were powerful enough to put some fear into would-be predators, even if it didn’t stop them entirely.
When they finally arrived at the address Hyukjae had given him, Donghae got more worried. The hostel wasn’t a total shithole, but it was on the edge of a bad part of town.
“You’re staying here?”
“It was cheap,” Hyukjae defended, looking a bit hurt.
“Oh, I’m sure. I’m not knocking that. But be careful when you go out around here. Especially at night. In fact, better not to go out at night.”
“I don’t have anywhere to go anyway. Or money to do anything with. So, I’ll be okay.”
“You could stay at my place, you know. It’s just me and my brother most of the time. My parents are hardly ever there.”
“I couldn’t,” Hyukjae shook his head. “And besides, it’s only until the audition. After that, if I make it, they provide housing for me and everything.”
“When did you say you go back?”
“They’re going to call me.”
“Oh! You have a phone? Give me your number and I’ll give you mine!”
“I don’t, not yet. They have the number of the front desk here to leave a message.”
“Oh,” Donghae was disappointed, but had already made a mental note to dig out one of his old cell phones and get it hooked back up with a new number so that Hyukjae wouldn’t be without one.
“Anyway, I can’t thank you enough for everything today. I mean, you really didn’t have to do so much. I’m still not sure why you’re so nice to me. But thanks.”
“I…” Donghae started, nearly blurting out that he liked him. But that would be too soon, wouldn’t it? He didn’t know for sure that Hyukjae would even be interested. All those blushes and nervous ducks of the head could be tied to general shyness and being in a new environment. “It’s nothing. I had a lot of fun.”
“Me too,” Hyukjae admitted. “So, um, goodnight then.”
“Hey, what are you doing tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow? Nothing, I guess.”
“I’ll come pick you up in the morning.”
“Why?”
“I promised to teach you to drive, didn’t I? We never even started that.”
“Don’t you have things to do?”
“Not really,” Donghae shrugged. “School’s done and I haven’t decided if I want to start college this fall or take a semester off and travel. For now, though, I’m just relaxing. Might as well help you out if I can, right? At least until your audition.”
A lopsided smile eased across the other boy’s face and Hyukjae finally nodded, his eyes soft. “Okay. As long as you don’t mind.”
“I don’t,” Donghae grinned back. “Now go on, get inside, I have to leave, and I want to make sure you’re safe first.”
Hyukjae looked torn between protesting about being treated like a girl and worried about whether Donghae was over exaggerating. In the end, he gave a grin and a wave and turned away, entering the building without another look back.
That night Donghae could barely sleep due to excitement. And the next day he was waiting at Hyukjae’s hotel, bright and early, ready for another day together.
Driving lessons were a complete bust. Hyukjae was so nervous behind the wheel of Donghae’s expensive car that he was afraid to do much more than creep forward at five miles an hour in an abandoned parking lot.
When Donghae realized that his new friend was on the verge of tears, he said, “Ah, that’s enough of this for today. We’ve got plenty of time for you to learn driving. Let’s go do something fun!”
They spent an exhausting day driving around LA, from the oceanside to the strip, and all Donghae’s favorite places in between. When evening crept in, they had dinner at a fancy restaurant where you could sometimes see celebrities – Donghae’s treat, against Hyukjae’s strong objection – though they didn’t see anyone they recognized.
But the highlight of it all was when Donghae managed to sneak them into a club where he knew the bouncer. Neither of them had any urge to drink, but the dance floor was lit, and he wanted to see Hyukjae’s moves.
The Korean boy did not disappoint. Hyukjae had the makings of a star, and Donghae wanted to stake his claim first. They joined one another under the flashing lights, the bass pulsating up through the soles of their feet. Donghae would never be the dancer Hyukjae was already, but he liked to think he could hold his own, and the other boy seemed appreciative, especially when Donghae started shaking his ass.
It was very late by the time they stumbled back outside, covered in sweat and laughing from the euphoria of the high their workout had given them. When Hyukjae shyly offered to let Donghae come upstairs and clean up a bit before going home, he didn’t hesitate for a second.
Would he have kissed him if they weren’t both tripping on adrenaline and teenage hormones? Probably not so soon. Yet when Donghae pressed close and gave a tentative kiss to those plump, sexy lips that made his stomach tingle, Hyukjae didn’t push him away.
One kiss led to another, and then they were making out like the crazy kids they still were, arms and legs wrapped around each other awkwardly, falling into the bed and kissing until neither could breathe.
Donghae wasn’t sure he was prepared to go farther, and he was almost positive Hyukjae wasn’t. But it was enough for that moment. The knowledge that their attraction was mutual. That they were compatible. That they – mostly Hyukjae, since Donghae already knew his preferences – liked it.
Exhausted and elated, they said very little, merely kissing and touching, until they finally fell asleep wrapped up in each other’s arms.
It was Donghae’s phone that woke them the next morning. And his mother was beyond pissed off.
“Where the hell are you? Your brother said you never came home last night, and I thought something happened to you!”
“I’m fine, mom,” Donghae sighed, pouting when Hyukjae carefully extracted himself from their embrace, and the bed, and hurried away into the bathroom. “I’m at a friend’s house and I guess I fell asleep.”
“That’s no excuse. Your poor brother was terrified.”
Rolling his eyes, Donghae knew that Marcus probably wouldn’t even notice he wasn’t there unless he went looking for him because he wanted something.
“I thought I texted before I fell asleep. Sorry.”
“Sorry isn’t good enough. I want you home right now!”
Which meant his mother wanted something from him, because she, too, rarely noticed his whereabouts unless she needed a favor.
“Okay, okay, I’ll be home in a little while.”
They said their goodbyes and Donghae hung up, standing up and stretching before going to shove the phone in his pocket.
“Are you in trouble?” came a hesitant voice from behind him.
“What? No, of course not, she’s just being dramatic.”
“You should go, though, right?”
Still sleepy, Donghae wasn’t befuddled enough to miss the fact that Hyuk wasn’t making eye contact with him. “Are you okay?”
“Me? Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Is it about what happened last night?” Donghae forced out, heart clenching at the thought that Hyukjae was already regretting it. Not that they had done anything, really, but he still might be freaking out over kissing another guy now that he was in his right mind.
“Of course not,” the blond head shook quickly. “Just, I don’t want you to worry your parents because of me.”
Letting out a snort, Donghae told him, “My parents don’t even notice me most of the time. She just wants something, and she’s pissed off because I wasn’t there when she needed to ask for it.”
“You should still go. We can… we can see each other another time.”
“Are you sure?” Donghae asked quietly. “Because I really do want to see you.”
Finally, Hyukjae’s eyes met his. There were so many emotions rolling around that Donghae couldn’t pinpoint exactly what mood the other might be in. “Yeah, maybe tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? Or later today?”
“But you don’t know what your mother wants.”
“True. So maybe not today, though I doubt whatever it is will take long.” Maybe Hyukjae needed a little breathing room, though. They had spent almost every waking minute together since they met, after all. “I’ll come back tomorrow then, okay? Maybe we can practice some more driving. Or I can just take you to some more fun places.”
“Sure,” Hyukjae nodded, and this time there was a smile, though not the huge gummy one he’d worn last night.
“Okay then,” Donghae stepped closer, pleased that while Hyukjae stiffened a little, he didn’t move back. “Last night was nice. Don’t overthink it.”
“You think I could stop thinking about it?” came the surprised reply.
“I hope not,” Donghae grinned cheekily. “Anyway, rest up today. If you do go out, be careful. I’ll come by tomorrow morning, all right?”
“Yeah,” Hyukjae nodded, his eyes softening, giving Donghae hope that things were good between them.
Just to make sure, he tugged Hyukjae closer and planted another soft kiss on his oh-so-kissable mouth, thrilled when it was returned. Maybe Hyukjae was just shy. He had every reason to be. But Donghae would be patient. He had already decided he wanted Hyukjae to be his. So, he could wait.
And wait he did. When Donghae went back to the hotel the following day, it was to be told that Hyukjae no longer lived there. He begged the owner for any message, a phone number, the information of what agency Hyukjae might have been trying out for, but he got nothing. He pestered the man so much that he was finally kicked out of the hotel.
So, he waited outside instead. At the beach where they had met. At the restaurants where they had eaten. He even exhausted all his connections in the industry in the vain hope of finding a young trainee dancer named Hyukjae.
But there was nothing. Hyukjae was a ghost, and Donghae was haunted. Had it all been a dream? Had Donghae read more into their brief friendship than was really there? Marcus said he’d been taken advantage of. That Hyukjae saw an opportunity and used Donghae for what he was willing to give. Marcus was always a pessimist though.
How could he leave without even a note? Was Donghae that forgettable? Or had their brief exploration of each other been so abhorrent to Hyukjae in hindsight, that he’d chosen to cut off all contact rather than be faced with what he had done in a moment of weakness?
Donghae was afraid to learn the answer. And after some time, in an effort to mask the pain, he made a decision that no one was expecting, including himself.