Chapter Text
It was the first week of August, weeks before Rey was to start college and despite the full academic scholarship she’d received from the prestigious Coruscant University things were looking pretty grim.
Plutt, her guardian, had refused to help fill out any loan applications. “Why in tarnation would I want to get into even more debt? Especially for the likes of you, you want to go, pay for it yourself,” the man had sneered.
Rey was unsurprised with this callous response, she was used to Plutt’s stinginess, but she had no way of paying for housing, much less a place to stay or enough money for food. The college dorms and dining programs with their high price tags were out of the question. The meager cash she’d earned working in high school would at best pay for one month.
Rey glanced at the Coruscant University poster on her wall. The beautiful campus mocked her with its ivy towers and fall foliage. She’d filled out dozens of job applications but she had quite a bit of competition with applicants who the right name and spent their high school summers interning with companies instead of wiping snot at a head start daycare.
“Am I foolish for dreaming that a girl like me could go to Coruscant?” Rey wondered aloud to no one in particular. For four years Rey had worked her ass off in high school with hopes of attending the University, she’d joined every club she could afford, tutored kids, participated in community service, heck she’d even been Valedictorian of her class with all of it’s 197 students.
Rey slammed her computer shut and picked up the acceptance letter from Jakku Community College, she’d also been given a full academic scholarship there. “I guess I’ll be going here,” Rey sighed. The community college set in the desert had no trees and its programs would keep Rey in her southwest town forever. Almost of all of her college bound classmates were attending there, no one had money in Jakku.
Rey’s poor excuse for a phone rang.
A polished voice demanded, "How soon can you start?"
“Who is this?” Rey stuttered in surprise.
“What do you mean who is this, this is Bazine Netal, did you not fill out an application to be my live in Nanny?”
Rey couldn’t believe it, she’d filled out the application weeks ago, thinking the advertisement for the job was a far flung shot in the dark. Rey might be from the middle of nowhere Jakku but even she had heard of the super model socialite. The application had been lengthy demanding not only a background check but essay long questions and an IQ test.
"Well I start Coruscant University in a few weeks so I really -," Rey started, surprised by the woman’s attitude.
"So this week then, right?" Bazine cut Rey off. "I mean you live in a foster home, surely you want out and want to get ready for your classes, you’re a small town girl who wants to live in the city or some other over the top Hallmark story?"
"Well if you give me the advance for the airline ticket I can start tomorrow," Rey was gobsmacked by this response.
"Perfect, my water just broke," Bazine responded to Rey's shock. “I cannot wait to get this gremlin out of my body and get my tubes tied you know. Pregnancy is not for someone like me. Never again, it's the damn antibiotics I took, apparently they cancel out birth control because believe me this wasn't planned."
Rey practically dropped the phone at this, she'd thought Unkar was cold but this, this was a whole new level.
"So anyways, I need you at the hospital," Bazine commanded. “I certainly can’t manage on my own.”
"What about the Dad?" Rey sputtered. Was Bazine single?
"We don't talk about the Dad, got it," Bazine snapped. "There is a no contact agreement as part of the custody arrangement, I want nothing to do with him and you will have nothing to do with him. On Friday mornings his driver will drop the kid off at mine and then you will watch the child until Monday morning. Thank God I found you or I'd actually have to watch a baby during the weekend. I've literally been looking for a Nanny for the past five months but applicants either are using the application process to look for their big break or are super judgey. Plus Grandma my ex's mother demanded that all applicants be run through him which really means her. A desperate poor nerd like you is perfect, or at least my agent thinks so. You’ll just be so grateful that I saved you from that rotten desert and can go to college or whatever you want to do.”
Rey blinked at this but held her tongue. There was a certain amount of truth in Bazine’s cruel assessment.
The woman rattled on, “You wouldn't believe the judgmental comments people have made about parenting and my career; I mean I only kept the baby because my agent said the market for modelling for maternity clothes was hot. My career has never been better."
Rey's eyes fell on her poster once again. The campus was so green, and was Rey’s only ticket out of this one horse town. Rey had wanted to leave Jakku since the day her parents had died when she’d been dumped with her distant cousin Unkarr. The only trees Rey remembered were in her dreams, dreams where her parents were alive. She didn't want to tolerate Bazine but if she didn't, she'd be staring at the desert the rest of her life.
"I'll go pack," Rey was agreed.
"Really, shit, you're so nerdy but Leia kept insisting that I interview someone wholesome like you. I guess I can't be picky at a time like this, oh God, this hurts. Just get here ASAP. "
************
With no regrets Rey packed her bags and said goodbye to Unkar.
“You’ll be back,” the man sneered. “Your momma thought she’d make something of herself and look at what happened to her. Course that side of the family was a bunch of snots, they were from HyperKarn.
Rey would not miss her guardian. It was only her momma’s last words in the hospital that had sustained her over the years, “I’ll always love you, even if I can’t be with you. You are loved little one. Someday you'll get out of this town and see the world."
Rey might be nothing and no one, but once upon a time she’d been loved. It was a love that carried Rey straight to Coruscant and when the plane landed, Rey gazed at the green parks of the city in amazement. Her momma had been right, she had finally left Jakku.
Rey stared at every tree she passed as she was driven to Coruscant hospital.
Bazine Netal greeted Rey, fully clad in clothes and make up. She did not look like a woman who had just given birth.
"Oh thank God you are here, I have to fly to Denmark," Bazine pointed to a little bed where the baby lay crying, "just do what you need to do."
Rey's mouth dropped open, "You had a baby yesterday and you're leaving now."
Bazine glared at her, "Listen, I didn't hire you to comment on my life, just watch her okay? At least your a passably pretty nerd even if your sense of fashion is so secondhand private school girl. Do me a favor and dress better, I'm certainly paying you enough."
Rey ignored the barb, Jakku had Amazon, Dollar General and a Goodwill - fashion didn't exist, She glanced at the poor baby. Her name had been embroidered on a hat, Natalie Grace. Rey would guess that both the name and the hat had been gifted by someone with far more investment in the child than Bazine.
A nurse popped in, "Miss Netal, we really insist you stay - you haven't watched any of the parenting videos we require."
"That's her job," Bazine pointed to Rey, "I'm leaving."
"But you can't..." the nurse stared at her.
"But I am," Bazine snorted, grabbing her bag, not even giving her child a second glance.
Rey picked up Natalie and cradled the crying baby in her arms. The child stared at Rey, her dark eyes seeking something that Rey was determined to give her. Rey snuggled the infant against her chest and the child settled. “I’ll take care of you sweetheart.” Little Natalie just let Rey hold her. Rey couldn’t give this child much but she could give her love. She felt so soft and sweet.
“You have a way with her,” the nurse said kindly. “I was tempted to call social services but -”
"I want everything you have," Rey interrupted her, "Parenting videos, classes, workshops, nutritional guides, everything you have." Rey could do this, she could take care of this poor abandoned child.
The nurse raised her eyebrows, "This is going to be the hardest thing you've ever done."
"I'm all in," Rey gently kissed the top of Natalie’s head.
"I believe you," the nurse smiled warmly.
***********
A day later Rey was delivered to Bazine Netal’s brownstone house with Natalie in tow. The child had all of the latest baby gadgets and clothing but Bazine didn’t even call to check in on little Natalie. She did however ship Rey an entirely new wardrobe that screamed Upper East Side Nanny Chic with designer sweaters and leggings. The first few days were exhausting as Natalie was always needing something especially formula, Rey had no idea babies ate so much. Rey felt both relief and sorrow as she strapped Natalie into her carseat Monday morning so that the baby could go see her father.
The father's driver was a large man with a full beard and his eyes were on Rey the whole time.
He said nothing to her but when Rey kissed Natalie, Rey swore she saw him smile.
“By sweet baby, I’ll see you soon.”
Friday couldn't come soon enough.
*********
Rey slept half of Monday and then did everything she needed to get ready for school. She was so excited, her dream of attending university was finally coming true. She decided not to put all of her eggs in one basket and got a part time job at a local cafe on Tuesday and Thursday mornings. Her classes weren’t till noon so she could do the morning shift.
The added advantage was that Rey met Finn and Rose. Finn was a former foster kid and he was working his way through school by juggling three jobs. Rose came from a large family so she worked in the cafe and commuted from her home across town to save money. Rey was so glad to meet two students who weren’t the privileged stereotype. They both loved little Natalie and one or both would often go with Rey as she pushed Nat in the stroller at the park. Rey loved taking Natalie to see the green oasis. She dragged her all over the city, to Museums, the Zoo, cafes, etc, soaking in everything she'd never experienced.
“I can’t wait till we take you to the beach,” Rose laughed at Rey’s enthusiasm at a giant lake in the city park.
“I can’t wait to take Natalie there,” Rey smiled at the little one who felt like hers.
“You’re so good with her,” Rose admitted. “Just don’t miss out on having fun. You are in college."
Rey had no desire for the typical college life, she’d seen what partying did to kids in Jakku and thought it wasn’t all that. The only boyfriend she’d had in high school had been a year older than her and lost his college scholarship from partying too hard. Rey couldn’t afford that."
So Rey enjoyed little Natalie, Finn, and Rose, and built relationships with customers who came to the cafe every week. They were eclectic and wonderful, many of them like Doctor Kalonia from the hospital became friends.
But it wasn’t until November that a man walked into the cafe that grabbed Rey’s attention. He was there every Tuesday and Thursday like clockwork at the crack of dawn. His dark eyes always had bags and his face wore stubble. His order was black coffee and he brought a laptop that seemed to have his full attention. Rey couldn't help but notice his long fingers as they typed over the keys.
Rey felt practically invisible every time she refilled his cup and he simply said, "thanks". He was certainly attractive with a large muscular body, dark hair and eyes and a face that was arresting.
This man was far too old for her, Rey was certain of that, yet she was more drawn to him than the run of the mill Golden Boys of Coruscant University whose money couldn't gild their entitlement. More than one had asked her out but Rey was no fool, they were more interested in her ass than her brain.
Every time this customer asked for something, Rey squeezed her thighs together, the man's voice was rich and could make, "please can I have more Joe," sound seductive.
It wasn’t until Thanksgiving day that he finally looked at her.
Rey had picked up several shifts over the Thanksgiving week as she didn’t have classes and had no intention of going back to Jakku. Mr. Tall and Silent as Rose liked to call him, hadn’t been in this morning so Rey was surprised to see him enter the place in the afternoon.
“I guess you are like me, nowhere to be this Thanksgiving,” Rey quipped.
The man looked up from his laptop, startled, “Did you say something, I’m good with coffee."
Rey felt stupid, “I guess I was just trying to make conversation. I’ll leave you to do your thing.” There would be no flirting with this man, that was for sure, he couldn't even pay attention to a hello."
The man frowned, his eyes finally seeing Rey after all these months. Rey flushed as his gaze took her in from her pert ponytail to the black skirt that displayed her "killer calfs" as her high school boyfriend had said. Rey knew her legs looked good and she took a smidge of satisfaction from the way this man's gaze lingered.
"Rey isn't it?" the man finally said.
Rey raised her eyebrows.
"Your name tag," the man pointed to Rey's tag and she blushed. "So why are you alone this thanksgiving?" A dash of concern laced his tone.
Rey could tell the man what she told Finn and Rose, that it was easier with her job to stay around, but the truth was plain and simple, Unkar had told her not to bother coming home; Rey had no one. Finn and Rose invited her to their homes but she didn’t want a pity invite and besides it was true, Natalie would need her on Friday. Rose was still kinda mad at her for not coming to hers but Rey just didn’t want to intrude -- especially when she knew Rose's parents had so little.
“I have nowhere else to go so I might as well be working,” Rey sighed.
“No where else to go,” the man was more sympathetic than Rey would have guessed, “But you're what eighteen, nineteen?”
“Nineteen and my parents are gone,” Rey replied. The man’s eyes widened.
“It’s okay,” Rey assured him.
The man looked both saddened and shocked, “I’m sorry kid."
“It’s okay, really,” Rey didn’t want to be an object of pity nor a kid- this man was the object of her dreams. “What about you?”
“What about me?” The man stared at Rey.
“Do you have someone to be with today?” Rey prodded, curious about this often silent and always reserved man.
The man laughed wryly, “I do, but damn, most of the time I don’t think I deserve her.”
Of course this man was taken. Rey said wistfully, “Go be with her, it’s the holidays, if I had someone to be with, I would be with them instead of here. You’re lucky to have someone you love.” Whoever had this man was lucky indeed.
“Oh I’m not married or dating or anything like that,” the man responded quickly. “Never had much luck when it came to that, they all just want my name and money, especially the last one, I’m talking about my kid.”
Rey was startled by this revelation, “You have a kid and you aren’t with them on Thanksgiving? Do you know what I would give to be with my parents today?” Both tears and anger filled her. Rage at the audacity of this man to abandon his child on a holiday poured out of her. "I would give anything, and you've just left your poor kid on their own. How can you do that to them?" Rey knew her voice was fierce but she didn't care.
The man obviously felt Rey’s wave of feelings as he took a deep breath and shut his computer down. “But would you want your Dad, even if he was a terrible person, whose done terrible things? I wrote a book that tore my practically destroyed my family, exposing my grandfather's sins, just to get a job. It tore my mother apart and practically killed my father. The only reason my family is talking to me is because of my daughter, they want her in their lives."
Rey could see the guilt plaguing this man, it defined him, seeping through every crack in his soul.
"Maybe you've made mistakes, but the greatest mistake you can continue to make is to back away from your child," Rey was softer in her approach. "You need to forgive yourself from your past."
"I don't deserve forgiveness, not from anyone," his bitterness was so pungent. "I just can't be there for her, I can't." His voice held finality.
"Your feelings have nothing to do with whether she needs you or not," Rey was blunt. "I can tell," her voice shook, "that your parents hurt you. Are you going to follow them in their path or create your own? My Uncle treated me terrible, awful really and I had a choice," Rey tried desperately not to cry, "to allow the past to make me like him or to treat those around me the way they deserved to be treated. Your daughter deserves to be loved by her father no matter you do or don't deserve yourself."
The man's brown eyes widened. "Man kid you know how to throw a punch but," he sighed, "You certainly have been through a lot." He sat up straight, "I guess this whole time I've missed the point about what Gracie needs haven't I?"
"Her name is Gracie?" Rey felt that was so fitting. This man needed so much grace to move forward.
"Yeah," a smile played at the man's lips, "Well that's what we call her, little Gracie. My grandmother insists on it and always says that Grace is the miracle in the storm."
Rey thought of little Natalie who was a miracle in the life of Bazine but the woman just couldn't see it. "Kid's have a way of grabbing our hearts, let your daughter have yours."
"I will," the man nodded, tears coming unabashedly falling down his cheeks, "Believe me I will." He cleared his throat, "But what about you? You have someplace to go, my mom would be happy to add an extra plate?"
Rey would love to go with this man for Thanksgiving but she knew what she wanted from him and what he was able to give were too entirely different things.
"I appreciate that but...." Rey thought of Rose and her family, "I have a friend who invited me over and I think I owe it to them to attend. They offered me kindness even though they don't have a lot."
"You should go," the man nodded. "I'm the last customer here you know, pretty sure Maz would tell you to go home."
Rey blinked, "How did you know Maz was the owner?"
"I notice more than you think Rey," the man winked. It was flirty but Rey was one hundred percent sure this man saw her as just a cute college kid at best.
"What’s your name?" Rey blurted out.
“Ben,” the man responded warmly, “Just call me Ben, haven’t gone by that in a long time but you know I think it’s time I did.”
“Happy Thanksgiving Ben,” Rey smiled warmly. “Good luck with your daughter.”
“I’ll be back on Tuesday kid,” Ben squeezed her shoulder and then he pulled out a bill, “Have a good one. Keep the change, you deserve it. You really, you really said something I needed to hear.”
Rey smiled to herself as Ben walked out of the cafe. She felt drawn to the man who’d obviously been through so much. She hoped he really did connect with his daughter. The kid deserved to be loved and Ben looked like he desperately needed to give it. He was a man in need of redemption, that was clear.
She picked up the cash off the table and stared at it in shock. Whoever the hell Ben was, he’d left her a thousand dollar bill.
Rey smiled, she would give the Tico family the best Thanksgiving in the world.