Chapter Text
Mingi is an omega.
When he presented, everyone he knew was shocked. They didn't necessarily wear confusion on their faces, nor did they gasp or balk. Mingi was met with that kind of stunned silence a person would get if announcing a natural disaster or sudden death. The initial reaction was quiet disbelief. Though nobody told him to his face, Mingi suspected that people expected his "wrinkles" to be ironed out as he aged. Surely, the lanky, awkward creature would blossom into a fine omega one day.
Right?
Alphas turn Mingi down.
At least, when it comes to being a romantic partner they do. They reject him down, left, right and center. Mingi's heard of places more progressive than where he lives - places where omegas whisper of change, where they can break beyond the boundaries of expectation. Wouldn't that be nice?
Unfortunately, in the boundaries of his life - his locale, his society - there are still expectations. A proper order, some may say, roles required for the sake of balance and harmony. No matter what efforts Mingi made, he could never quite shape himself to fit that mold. Mingi is so vastly different that he considers himself downright misshapen - and all the alphas he's ever met seem to agree based on their reactions.
Their flimsy egos struggled with his appearance. Those that could get past it were quickly put off by other things - his lack of domestic aptitude. His history.
Mingi put up with rejection so much that it haunted him. Rejection and resentment sat on his shoulders like malevolent spirits, haunting him. So, he did what any sensible person could do - he exercised the only option he thought he had left.
He reinvented himself.
His new path started with inhibiters and a move to a new city. He doesn't tell people he's a beta, but... He doesn't deny it, either. With his complete lack of a scent, nobody questions him. He applies makeup over the fading mating mark that stains his skin and gets damn good at it. Then he finds himself a job.
At first, he's fine. Happy, even. Relieved he doesn't feel judged for existing, for breathing, for being an omega, for having a broken bond. He can live among people for once in his fucking life without suffocating.
But soon enough, his needs gnaw at him.
There's an alpha.
A beautiful, bubbly, golden, sunshiney alpha. The man's about as stereotypical as they get, but in all the best ways. He's sweet, kind, funny, and a provider practically to a fault. He's the type that walys makes people laugh and always makes sure they feel included. That's how they met, actually. Mingi had been pressing himself against the wall at some work function when the alpha had approached him the first time. The alpha had coaxed Mingi out of his shell with such patience and gentleness, like he was introducing himself to some skittish, stray animal.
Yunho.
They become quick friends. It's impossible not to be, really. The man is magnetic. Being drawn to him is an inevitability. Not an "if" but a "when".
Mingi doesn't dare impose himself on the other, of course, but upon the occasiona that he catches an errant ray of that sunlight, he basks. The needy wolf inside of him paws at its cage of repression, weakly begging to be courted. To be loved.
The two grow close over time, and while Mingi feels lucky to be Yunho's friend, he starts feeling... Tension.
One-sided, of course.
Why wouldn't it be?
Luckily, masking is something Mingi can manage. He maintains their friendship stubbornly, even as the thread of sanity inside him pulls more and more taut. Things go well for a while, but Mingi starts to feel sick. It's too late when he realizes that his inhibitors stopped working the way they should.
When his heat comes around, it's something fierce. The combination of weak inhibitors and the persistent heat make what should be a relatively mild experience something excruciating. Mingi can do little more than writhe and shudder in bed, alternating between sweltering hot and frozen to the bone. The heat puts him out of commission, and within days, depressive mood swings begin rearing their ugly head while he hunches over in pain.
Though his pills typically suppress his sexual appetite, they seem to be doing fuck all for this heat. Mingi's bleary brain can think of nothing to supply his imagination except for one thing: Yunho. Fantastical, indulgent daydreams of Yunho tending to him, kissing the sweat off of his skin, knotting him and pumping him full of pups.
It adds shame to the list of awful that embodies this heat. Mingi knows it's downright pitiful, but he's powerless to stop himself, too vulnerable. The omega within him takes over, insisting on the indulgence, uncaring of the consequences, the guilt and shame that will follow.
It's day three or four of the heat when a knock comes to Mingi's door. The sound barely pierces the haze of the omega's squalor. Mingi faintly recalls ordering delivery and figures that's probably what it is.
He plods to the door, leaden from fatigue, and answers it looking every bit as disheveled as he feels, expecting a quick handoff. When he opens the door, he extends his hand quickly, a polite "thank you" on his lips.
Then everything comes to a screeching halt.
Standing in front of him - right in the flesh - is the subject of his fantasies. The mere sight of the other almost makes Mingi whine. He's holding a container of what appears to be soup, hair slightly mussed and cheeks flushed from the wind buffeting outside. A warm, comforting scent wafts off of him, underlined with the slightest note of worry.
Worry...
Worry for Mingi?
"You, um, seemed to feel really bad..." Yunho starts.
It makes Mingi feel even worse. Humiliation floods Mingi's body, along with guilt for what he'd done - what he's spent the past few days imagining. Yunho's been concerned for him, worried about his "sick" "beta" friend - all the while, Mingi's crying out, humping his pillow and picturing the other in compromising positions. In spite of his mind's protest, Mingi's omega clamors. His stomach drops as he feels slick bead up in his hole. Another wave of hotness washes over him, covering his skin in a fresh coat of sweat.
Yunho's expression changes, gradually transforming from amicable to... Different.
Disgust, Mingi thinks. He looks disgusted. And why wouldn't he be? That's what he is, after all. Disgusting, perverse, and reeking of desperation.
"I thought you might... Want some soup," Yunho's gaze casts downward as he extends the offering toward the other. He can't make contact.
"Th-thanks." Mingi chokes out.
Thank you so much for being caring. Thank you so much for existing. Thank you for having the manners not to call me vile and disgusting to my face. Thank you for letting me stand in your presence. Thank you for considering me a friend even if that changes now.
So much runs through Mingi’s head, but all he can choke out is “That’s kind of you.”
“It’s okay. I, you… Um- Are you-?”
“Sorry I’m- r-really sick. I have to go-“ Mingi shuts the door in a panic. His hands shake, his grip wrapping around the soup container like a vice.
This changes things, doesn’t it? He knows. He has to know. Now what’ll Yunho do? What will he say?
Mingi wishes he could enjoy the fact that Yunho cares- appreciate that he brought him soup, fuck’s sake, did something so extra and sweet and kind and wonderful because that’s Yunho. Yunho is wonderful and sunshine and kindness and determination. He is so, so many good things, and for him to spend even an ounce of time or energy on Mingi is astounding.
And yet, Mingi can't even enjoy it. All of that goodness gets smothered by pain and longing.
The rest of the week is a wash - a blur of slick and pain, illness and nausea and jaw dropping, vision smearing, toe-curling indulgence - the kind that Mingi knows he'll hate himself for when the fog clears.
He sees a few notifications from Yunho, but he ignores them.
When the haze clears, Mingi acts normal. He books a doctor's appointment to deal with his malfunctioning meds and makes a point to avoid Yunho at work.
The "avoid" thing only lasts a few days. Maybe it's Mingi, maybe it's his omega - that part of him he tries so damn hard to suppress.
Yunho approaches him in the hall on a break, and instead of hightailing it, Mingi finds himself welded in place. He simply watches with wide eyes, brain screaming at him to run while his omega digs in its heels. Ultimately, his wolf's demands to stay put win out.
"Hey," Yunho says, half smile on his face. He approaches Mingi with a soft voice like he's addrssing a skittish animal.
He knows.
The omega's brain buzzes with dread and anxiety.
He knows. He knows. He knows. He knows. And now- and now what?
Things will be different. Mingi knows they will. Yunho will take one whiff of his pitiful desperation and bolt. He'll start putting distance between them, start treating Mingi differently.
He'll play it off as normal at first, pretend he's busy, that life's gotten crazy. That's how it always starts. Then they strategically detach until the last text send is left on read months ago and they avoid eye contact.
"You, uh, feeling better?" Yunho tries.
"Uh- Yeah." Can he smell me right now - Mingi wonders. His blockers should be working. After his heat, he felt pretty normal, but he has a hard time telling. The inhibitors dull his sense of smell.
"Hey. I just wanna, um, apologize for dropping by like that," The alpha scratches his nape sheepishly.
There it is.
The start.
The wedge getting set in place, soon to be drien between them. Their freindly rapport will soon wither away. Mingi's stomach turns.
"It's fine," Mingi responds. It's more than fine, really. It's sweet. It's kind. It's heart-wrenching.
"Are you, um, you feeling better now?"
"Yeah." Physically, yes. Mentally? No. God no.
A strained, awkward silence ensues afterward. Just as Mingi opens his mouth, intent on absconding, Yunho replies.
"I, um- I didn't know you-"
"Yeah, I- I-"
"-didn't know you had a mate."
"-I ac-a- wh- uh- a mate?" Mingi's eyes blow wide open.
"S-sorry. I could, uh, I could smell it," Yunho's face flushes, clearly embarrassed at what he thought occurred.
Mingi finds himself at a crossroads, and while his logical sign knows there's a right thing to do...
"It's okay."
He doesn't feel all that logical around Yunho.
"Yeah. Uh- Wow, they- uh, so how long has it been?"
"Hm?"
"How long have you had a mate? I mean- I had no idea. Not that it's my business, I guess..." Yunho looks almost crestfallen at the realization. Must be a trick of the light, Mingi thinks.
"Oh-! No, it's... I guess I just don't- talk about that part of my life."
"Wow. You're so mysterious!" The alpha remarks. "I wonder what else I don't know about you."
Your head would spin.
"Oh, please. I'm, like, the opposite of mysterious," Mingi laughs.
In spite of everything, Yunho can pull a laugh out of him. Only Yunho.
“So when do I get to meet ‘em?”
“Meet? Them?” There goes Mingi's smile. “I, er-“
“Come on. I just wanna know who this mystical omega is?”
“Mystical?!” Mingi snorts.
“Anyone who can pull you out of your shell is mystical to me," The alpha says with a smile.
If only he knew. Damning as the situation is, Mingi can’t help but preen under the attention. He plays along. This is his fault, after all.
“Oh they’re- they’re alright.”
“Alright enough to take a week off of work for their heat cycle.” Yunho elbows him. It’s a chaste gesture, but it sends fire through Mingi’s veins regardless.
“I- I guess that’s a thing.”
“So? C’mon, the pup’s out of the bag. Just one thing- tell me one thing about them.”
“Why?”
“Uh- Because you’re one of my best friends and I care? I mean- I guess if you really wanna keep it a secret…” The alpha looks so sad at the prospect. He serves sad puppy eyes on a silver (puffy-cheeked) platter. Mingi is rendered powerless and gives in with embarrassing ease.
“It’s not that!”
"Oh?" Yunho bounces back quickly, brows raising high on his forehead.
"It's just that..." Fuck, "-my, uh, my mate-" don't do this "-they, um-" why are you doing this? "-we're keeping things... Quiet."
"Quiet? What, like a secret?"
"No- well, uh- yes. Yeah, um-" fuck fuck fuck.
"How come?" Yunho tilts his head curiously.
"It's a secret because their, um, family doesn't approve of me. Or the relationship..."
"Oh," The alpha frowns. "But you're awesome. Why wouldn't they- wait. Is it because of what you are?"
"What?!" Mingi panics for a second.
"Because you're a beta?"
"I- Yes. That- that's it. Yeah, they're, um, really traditional."
"Damn. That fuckin' blows. You're, like, a prize. You deserve better than that."
The alpha's words manage to make Mingi's heart do several flips.
"Thanks."
"But, like, you like them a lot, right?"
"Hm?"
"Your mate!" Yunho gives Mingi a playful smack on the shoulder. It radiates heat, blissful fire branding into Mingi's back. "I mean- sneaking around, spending a whole fuckin' week with them... Or, wait, are you just like-" he wiggles his brows.
"Just like what?"
"Y'know. Heat meat."
"What?!" Mingi guffaws.
"Heat meat- what- you haven't heard it? I guess it's not a big beta thing, but like- y'know, sometimes omegas need a little something on the side. Helps their heats pass blissfully- you get me, right?"
No. God, no.
Mingi fucking wishes he could relate to the concept. Unfortunately, the powers that be didn't give him the petite frame or sweet, nurturing personality that alphas seem so keen on. "Blissful" is the last fucking word he'd associate with his heat. Even when he had a mate.
All his mate did was make him feel worthless. The alpha would order him around, mark him, insult him and fuck him, cover him in bruises and scratches. Remind him that it was what he wanted. What he needed.
It was wrong, and Mingi recognizes that now - but, at the time (and even now), it was the best heat he'd ever known.
He can't imagine being propositioned for some flighty "heat meat" situation. Hearing about it from Yunho - imagining Yunho doing that for an omega - sends another shock down Mingi's spine.
"Uh, yeah. Not much of a, um, beta thing, I guess," Mingi stammers out, face flushed.
"Ah~ Guess it makes sense. Well... Listen, if you and your mate have to keep things under wraps, your secret's safe with me."
"Really?"
"Huh? Yeah, really. Why would I out you like that?"
Ming immediately withers at the other's tone. Of course Yunho wouldn't. He's a decent fucking person. It's not his fault that Mingi has to come to expect the bare fucking minimum out of people. It isn't fair to him.
"Uh- Sorry."
"No, don't apologize. I just- I care about you, okay? I wouldn't wanna do something that would hurt you."
"Thanks. Sorry, I just- I'm not used to- to-"
"To friends?" Yunho doesn't intend for it to sound so pathetic, but it does. Perhaps it'd be less pitiful if it didn't ring true. Even the alpha realizes it, and he grimaces at the implication.
"To people being nice?" Yunho tries again which isn't much better.
Still, ever confident, the alpha recovers, "Just- Don't worry about apologizing or anything, okay? The least you deserve is the discretion of your friends."
"You've said that like three times."
"What?"
"That I deserve better," Mingi chuckles, playing it off as a joke.
Yunho considers him for a moment, expression softening to something tender that Mingi doesn't think he's earned.
"Yeah, 'cause you do."
"I didn't even do anything."
"What?"
"To deserve shit."
"Course you did."
"Bro, I'm out here existing."
Yunho grins ear to ear, "Exactly."
Mingi doesn't know how to respond to that, so he doesn't.