Chapter Text
Rey shouldn’t have been driving that night, but she had reservations for her first vacation ever that had been postponed since Christmas, and a freak March blizzard was not going to stop her. It was just weather.
Problem was, she’d grown up in a desert and hadn’t learned to appreciate what that much snow and wind could do.
Her little Subaru treks along, the windshield a blur of white and a long, shrouded road. Her headlights reflect the flurry back at her, adding a strange glare, and Rey squints as she leans forward in her seat. Her grip on the steering wheel is white-knuckled and cold. The heat wasn’t working as well as it should have.
And she still had hours to go to the cabin resort. According to the GPS, she’d made a wrong turn somewhere, but she was mostly back on track. Just... late.
The empty road doesn’t look any different when she loses control.
One second, there’s just the stretch in front of her, miles long and buried in ice with no other cars in sight. The next, everything is swinging, pitching to the right as her tires destabilize. There is no slow-motion; nothing slows down at all. She cranks the steering wheel desperately, holding her breath and gazing around at the careening world outside of the safety of the cab. It does nothing.
The Subaru leers to the side, still going full speed, and Rey doesn’t even scream when she collides into the snowbank.
—
It’s cold.
Rey opens her eyes to a bright white world, teeth chattering. Past the cold comes a sudden, sharp throb in her head, and Rey winces, hissing as she instinctively reaches a hand to the source of the pain. There’s instantly a tender lump, and Rey groans — fuck. She had spun out and crashed. She can see the faint discoloration on the steering wheel where her head made contact.
Everything was spinning, though, and she felt kind of sick. And terribly, terribly cold.
She didn’t know how long she had been out for. Her car is off — possibly totaled, but the airbags hadn’t gone off. Past the powder piled on her windshield she can see the thick trunk of a pine that she must have slammed into. Still chattering, she rubs her arms, trying to muster up some warmth.
Where was her phone? She needed to call for help. Shivering, she scrambles around her console until her phone appears, and it’s completely dead. The screen doesn’t even blip on.
Rey swallows thickly, and it hurts. Fuck.
The urge to vomit comes again, and she blearily wonders if this is a concussion. It wouldn’t be surprising if she hit her head. She swallows down the spit gathering in her mouth, and then a wave of static comes over her a second time. Her head lolls to the side, unconscious.
She comes to to the sound of snow scraping.
Blinking in the light, Rey groans, unable to feel her limbs. Everything is so cold it’s inside of her now.
But something is moving and shifting. Something is making noise. It sounds like — an animal, digging.
Weakly, Rey tilts her head, and past her frozen, frosted window is a pair of densely gloved hands shoveling away snow.
Rey can only watch in trembling anticipation, unsure of who was there, hoping it was help but knowing it might not be out in these parts. She was in the middle of nowhere woods, miles away from civilization. If she were lucky, it was a passerby who saw her, with a car and warmth and a way to contact help.
Her vision fades in and out intermittently, but she grits her teeth and furrows her brow, trying to focus on the vague figure outside her car, shoveling away.
They’re tall, she thinks. Dressed in dark colors, and strong by the looks of it. She takes deep, shaky breaths, trying to ignore the stinging bite of the cold in each inhale. Her lungs hurt.
Rey coughs softly, and closes her eyes.
Her door handle rattles.
Eyes popping open, Rey’s head swings to the side, and can barely make out a man’s face hidden by a thick scarf and hat past her icy window. The snow is still coming down relentlessly outside, and she can’t hear the man’s muffled voice, but he’s pointing towards her door and pulling on the handle.
Oh, she realizes. It’s locked.
It takes an impossible amount of strength to reach up and finagle the lock. But it unlatches, and there’s a blast of polar air as the door creaks open, ice cracking as it does.
“Hey.” The voice that reaches her is stifled by the scarf, but low and clear. “You still with me?”
“Urgh,” Rey garbles, trying to nod.
“Can you move?” he asks, unbuckling her seatbelt for her. He makes quick work of it.
Rey tries to nod again. She can sort of move. She’s just... frozen, and tired, and everything hurts.
She tries to get up, but powerful hands gently pin her back down.
“No need yet,” the man says. “I‘m going to check your head for bleeding.”
Which he does. The same hands, wet from snow, gingerly take her scalp and he leans her head down enough for him to check all of it. She didn’t feel any bleeding, but then again, she couldn’t feel much of anything at the moment.
“I don’t see anything.” Well that was good, she supposed. “I don’t know how you got here, but we don’t have access to emergency services. I’m going to take you back with me. Does anything feel broken?”
Sluggishly, Rey focuses and tries to budge and flex her muscles across her entire body. Everything hurt, but nothing felt broken as far as she knew.
“Mm-mm,” she shakes her head.
“Okay. Brace, I’m going to haul you out.”
Rey obeys as much as she can. It’s so cold and snow is piling into her car with the gale, sticking to her eyelashes. The man carefully snakes his arms around her before hauling her up and out, and Rey winces from all the sudden movement, but he persists forward. They trudge through deep snow until he deposits her on the back of some sort of vehicle.
“Stay here, this is our ride,” the man explains. “I’ll grab your bag, I saw it up front.”
Rey slumps forward, shivering violently as she waits for him to leave and return again. From the handles and the gauges she can barely make out in front of her, he had left her on his snowmobile. She just wanted to be inside shelter.
He comes back, thankfully. When he does, she’s greeted with him dusting snow off of her before taking a moment to wrap his thick scarf around her head and face and neck, tucking it in snugly. He places her in front of him on the seat, and she feels the protective wall of his large body saddling in behind her. It’s an instant relief. Shelter.
Underneath them, with a few knobs and clicks, the machine revs to life. The rumbling motor cuts through the blizzard, and the man double checks that Rey is securely in his control before throttling the engine and lurching them forward.
Rey can’t see a single thing with the speed and wind. She tries to go to a deep place inside of her mind to wait it out — the cold stings and whips against her cheeks, and she’s grateful for the scant warmth of the scarf. The man doesn’t say a single word to her as they ride, only tightens his thighs around hers when they make turns, and keeps her buried against him.
They travel down the road, Rey thinks, but then cut into the woods. The snow is shielded marginally more by the treetops, but it’s still heavy, and they still have to glide through a thick path to reach their destination.
Just when Rey thinks she could fall asleep and freeze to death, the snowmobile slows to a steady halt.
The man helps pry her off the seating as soon as he’s off. Again, he lifts her into his arms, and marches through a dense bank to get to stairs that lead to a front door.
It’s impossible to make out the structure entirely, but it’s some sort of modest cabin, laden with pillows of snow and ice. There’s warm light coming from inside the windows. She can smell smoke.
The man hauls her up the stairs effortlessly. Then, he opens his door with one hand, slams it behind them, and walks her straight to what can only be some sort of cot, or bed.
Heat. Warmth. So much of it. There’s a fire going and the room is stuffy and perfect. She’s shivering violently, but her head is fuzzy, and there’s a funny darkness creeping around the corners of her consciousness.
It’s fine, she thinks. She’ll just sleep some more.
—
Rey rouses clumsily.
Distantly, she’s aware of the sound of a fire crackling — a safe, homely one. She’s not cold, which is important for some reason, and she’s very, very comfortable.
Slowly, her eyes open and she shifts, only to find that she’s pressed up against something large and solid and burning hot.
Rey freezes. She’s staring at a bare chest that she doesn’t recognize. Her head hurts horribly, throbbing. She’s not wearing clothes, minus her underwear. Everything comes back to her suddenly — the ice, the veering, the crash. The cold.
The man.
Rey’s eyes widen. Painstakingly, she tilts her head back until she makes eye contact with the man who had saved her life.
Neither of them are wearing clothes. And they’re in a bed together.
Rey’s heart races wildly. She might be sick.
“Take a deep breath,” the man says, and his voice is just as low and strong as she remembers. “You almost froze to death. Had to get you warm. Nothing else happened.”
Rey is shaking, she realizes, but she reluctantly takes a breath and tries to steady her thoughts. Her body is sore, but with a quick squirm and physical check, no, she doesn’t seem to have been assaulted. Except by herself, of course.
“Who are you?” Rey asks, and her voice is a creaky rasp.
“Kylo.” The man answers. “And you?”
“Rey.” She’s too exhausted to lie.
“How’s your head?” Kylo prompts.
“Terrible,” Rey croaks back. “I think I hit it on the steering wheel.”
“I assumed as much from the looks of it.”
They go quiet after that. It is warm, at least, and even if every inch of her body is in pain, the room is very dim with meager firelight, and the blankets and body beside her are sumptuous with heat.
“Do you want me to get up?” Kylo asks, quietly. Rey stirs, thinking for barely half a second before making a noise of denial.
“No,” she says. “I don’t mind.”
So he doesn’t move. She’s fine with that.
—
Every time she wakes up, things are a little better.
Rey comes to and gets a noseful of some sort of savory, delightful, mouthwatering scent. She can’t describe it, it just smells good. Tiredly, she tries to push herself to her elbows only to be met with a stern sound and heavy footsteps.
“No,” Kylo says firmly. “You need to lie down.”
Rey grimaces, but listens. It felt better laying down anyway.
Kylo busybodies about, and this time he’s up and fully dressed. Her temperature must have regulated while she was sleeping, she thinks. By the fire, he tends to some sort of pot cooking on it, stirring a few times before ladling a healthy serving of something brothy into a plain bowl.
Kylo returns to her, and for the first time, Rey notices how tall he actually is. He’s broad, too, like a redwood.
“You need to eat something easy,” he informs her, and he pulls up a short wooden stool to sit by her bedside. He places the bowl down long enough to prop up her pillows and get her sitting fairly upright, comfortably. Then, he blows on the bowl’s contents to cool it down, and takes a spoonful to deliver to Rey’s waiting lips. “Here. Drink. It’s soup.”
Rey doesn’t have to be told twice; the soup smells unbelievable up close, and with some effort she manages to open her mouth and accept the helping.
Fuck. It was amazing. It was hot, but it was the best soup she’d ever eaten.
Rey makes an unbecoming noise of satisfaction, swallowing thickly as the broth coats her tongue. She thinks there’s lentils in it. Maybe chicken.
“Good?” Kylo asks.
“So good,” Rey croaks, nodding. He doesn’t smile, but he offers her another bite that she gratefully accepts.
They fall into the rhythm of feeding and eating. Rey feels stronger, better with every spoonful, and Kylo is patient with his hand. His face never seems to betray a single emotion.
Rey finds herself staring at the strange man who rescued her. He looks older than her, though not uncomfortably so. His hair is black and long, clean but unkempt, and it frames his long, curt face. He’s kind of handsome, in a rough way.
Funny how they had been half-naked in a bed together a matter of hours ago.
“You’re going to need a lot of rest,” Kylo says, placing down the bowl and spoon to give her a break. “You’re probably concussed.”
Rey frowns. That sucked. But it made sense. She was totally going to miss her reservation.
Kylo holds up four fingers. “How many fingers am I holding up?”
“Four,” Rey answers firmly.
“And the date?”
Rey rattles off the date before hesitating. “Wait, I don’t know how long I’ve been out for.”
“Good enough. You don’t have any symptoms of an internal bleed, so I’ll keep an eye on you. If anything feels wrong or off, tell me.”
Rey winces as if on cue, placing a delicate hand tenderly on the now-bandaged lump on her head. That was nice of him.
“How long will the storm last?” she asks, wondering when she could feasibly leave. Not that she could drive in this state.
“Days,” Kylo answers. “This is a bad one. You shouldn’t have been out there.”
“Was trying to get somewhere,” Rey grumbles back. “I fucked up.”
Kylo gives her a dry look. “You’re not going anywhere now. It’s going to take time for you to heal, and for the roads to clear up. This is private property. Nearest town is two hours west.”
Great, Rey thinks. She would be the one to divert this far out, wouldn’t she.
“So I stay here?” she asks, feeling dumb.
“If I let you leave, you will die.”
Comforting. Rey thinks maybe the man is being a bit over dramatic, but when the wind whips outside the cabin, whistling sharply and making the windows rattle, she second-guesses her assessment. Maybe it was a bad one.
“I don’t want to be a burden,” Rey says, and involuntarily yawns. “I’m supposed... to be on vacation.”
“Your plans are postponed indefinitely until you’re not a walking statistic.”
Kylo steps away briefly, and Rey thinks she sees him grab a kettle. Steam appears from whatever he’s pouring, and when he returns, carefully brings a cup to her lips.
“Barley tea,” he explains briefly.
Rey sips from it lightly. It was scalding, but good — weird. Not sweet at all. It tasted more like thick wheat.
“Thank you,” she remembers to say after a moment. “For saving me.”
“Police would ask too many questions if you died on my property.”
He doesn’t bat an eye as he says it. Rey almost smiles. She thinks he was actually trying to be a little funny.
By the time she finishes her tea and has a little more soup, her belly is full and her eyes are heavy again. Kylo tells her directly to rest, so she does.
Intermittently, she wakes up to different things. Sometimes it’s Kylo with a cup of water, keeping her hydrated. Sometimes he’s peeling up her bandage, applying some sort of salve to it that smells like herbs and is sticky. Her second meal — she has no idea how much time has passed — is more soup, and it’s just as good as the first time.
But she has to use the bathroom really bad.
“There’s plumbing. I’ll carry you.”
Rey has the decency to be vaguely embarrassed as her savior collects her from the bed — his bed, she is realizing, as there is no other bed in the cabin — and carries her to a closed wooden door. Carefully, painstakingly, he deposits her on her feet, keeping an ironclad grip on her arms to ensure she doesn’t keel over.
“Standing?” he asks.
Rey wobbles, clutching onto his arm instinctively, but regains her balance. Mostly. “I think so.”
“Do you want me to go in with you?” If she wasn’t mistaken, was that a note of worry in his voice?
“No,” she insists, “I’ll be fine.”
“I’m going to wait right here.”
“Fine.”
It was caring of him, she begrudged. Tottering into the small restroom, she finally enjoyed relief on the surprisingly normal toilet, trying to ignore that there was a man she barely knew waiting right outside the door.
Getting up from sitting was a little hard, but she braces herself on the walls and manages. When she’s decent again, she fumbles the door and lock open, and Kylo is waiting there, as promised, and seems relieved to see her.
“Good,” he says, like she’s a dog who’s completed a task. “Back to bed.”
Bossy, she thinks, but she allows him to scoop her up and cradle her back to her soft prison.
“How long have you lived here?” Rey finds herself asking out of pure curiosity. The cabin didn’t look particularly new, but it was very clean and well-built. It could have belonged to his family.
“Ten years. Built this after I got out of the Navy.”
Ah, he was a vet. Several things made sense and clicked into place — his stoic attitude, his strangely well-stocked home, and sense of survivalism.
“How long did you serve for?”
“Six years. Three tours.”
That was a lot for six years. Rey nods, gazing around at the cabin he built. It was sturdy, and hand-furnished with little clutter but a cozy feel. He did a very good job, for what it was worth.
“I like it,” she murmurs. “You built a good home.”
Kylo is quiet. Then, “Thanks.” He pauses again. “Where are you from?”
“A little town called Jakku,” Rey answers distantly, thinking back on the place with a tinge of unpleasantness. “But I just moved to Takodana not too long ago.”
“I’ve heard of it.”
“It’s not much, but it’s nice there. Good weather. Good people.” Rey thinks about her boss, Maz, with a twinge of guilt — she hopes she can get back before her vacation is over. She didn’t want to miss work at the greenhouse and worry her. “I was just taking my first vacation, actually. A cabin out near Hoth.”
“By yourself?” Kylo asks incredulously.
Rey shrugs. “It’s nice being alone sometimes.”
Kylo mulls on that, but nods. He gets it.
“You’re getting your cabin stay either way,” he reasons, and Rey snorts.
“That’s one way of looking at it. This is pretty pampering, though. You’ve been very kind.”
Kylo just grunts, obviously bad at taking compliments.
—
The storm gives them plenty of time to converse. Rey dozes in and out fitfully, though her body feels stronger and stronger each time she wakes up. Between resting, Rey watches Kylo tend to his home; he goes outside rarely, mostly doing housekeeping and cleaning and preparing meals. Once, in the middle of the night, she catches him reading a book by candlelight, but she can’t make out the cover.
They’re snowed in fully, at some point. Kylo can’t get his door open. He says to be prepared for several more days of this, and Rey resigns herself to being trapped inside with the man who saved her.
She also learns he doesn’t own a phone.
“How do you live without a phone?” She can’t fathom it. She slurps at her barley tea, now accustomed to the rich flavor and enjoying how it fortifies her.
“Peacefully,” Kylo responds.
“You don’t have anyone to call if there’s an emergency. Is there no one who would try to get in touch with you?” She had already told Finn and Poe and Rose she’d be unreachable at the remote cabin — if they knew she was “missing”, her phone would be blowing up. It’s unimaginable to consider.
“There are,” Kylo says cryptically. “I just have no interest in it.”
Rey lets out a surprised snort. He was wild.
“So you’re resigned to dying alone out here,” she reasons.
“Yes.”
Well then. She didn’t have anything to say to that. She was in a similar position herself once upon a time.
“People suck,” Rey agrees after a minute.
“They do.”
“I didn’t have anyone for a long time.” Rey doesn’t know why she’s telling him this. Probably the concussion. “It was only recently that I made a couple friends. I’m still getting used to it.”
“I’m not good at getting along with others.”
Rey smiles faintly. “You haven’t been too bad.”
Kylo scratches his head and looks away.
—
Rey is eternally grateful that he grabbed her bag from the front seat. It meant she had clean clothes to change into, and after several days as Kylo’s captive (sarcasm) she was ready to bathe.
“You could slip and fall very easily,” Kylo warns, and by now she’s learned it’s his stubborn way of worrying about her. She’d just convinced him to stop hovering outside the bathroom.
“I could,” Rey agrees, “but I don’t want to, so I’m not going to. I’ll be careful.”
Kylo exhales through his nose. “Fine. But I’m waiting outside the door.”
Rey rolls her eyes and winces at the pain.
The shower is heavenly. It’s more of a contraption than a shower; it uses levers and solar power to heat it. Kylo said he had enough in the reserves to give them hot showers for at least a week, so Rey indulges and shivers violently as the heat seeps into her skin.
To no one’s surprise, Kylo owns basic drugstore shampoo and conditioner, and a plain bar of soap. Rey makes due with it. Of course the man with gorgeous hair uses cheap care products and still looks good.
She blushes at the thought. What was she getting at? Well, he was attractive. There was nothing wrong with admitting that. And he had a lot of admirable qualities.
Rey shakes her head, which is a mistake, because it makes her dizzy. She has to lean against the wall to regain her senses.
The shower wraps up quickly after that, not wanting to tempt fate any further. She gets out and grabs a black towel to dry herself, slowly making her way down her body.
And she realizes she didn’t bring clean clothes in with her.
Rey sighs. Indignant, she wraps the towel around herself and tightens it, trying to will the blood out of her cheeks as she reaches for the door.
She takes a deep breath and opens it.
“Done already?” Kylo asks, but then starts staring at her like she’s grown three heads.
“Yeah,” Rey says awkwardly, “just forgot my clothes.” She hurries to grab them off her bag, and hustles back to the bathroom to change.
With a final glance, she notices his ears are red.
Rey makes slow work of putting her clothes on, both struggling from her physical incapacitation, and from embarrassment. So what if she wore a towel in front of him? They had cuddled naked. He had probably seen more.
Rey blushes as a stupid thought crosses her mind: did he like it?
Cheeks burning, she pulls her long-sleeved shirt over her head, and clamps her hands over her face.
Kylo acts completely normal when she walks out, like nothing had transpired at all. Rey is perfectly fine with that.
“What book were you reading earlier?” Rey asks, desperate to change the subject fully and move on. She did not need to ruminate on being half-naked in front of him. “I couldn’t see the cover.”
“Wheel of Time,” he says. “It’s a fantasy series.”
“Oh, the long one, right? I’ve heard of it. Is it good?”
“Yes. This is my third re-read. I read it for the first time in high school, then when I was deployed.”
He hadn’t brought up being deployed since he mentioned it the first time. Rey assumed it wasn’t a simple subject, and wasn’t sure if she should ask for details. He might not appreciate the prying.
“I haven’t read anything in a long time,” Rey admits. “I’m better with numbers.”
“Reading is one of the only distractions I have.” Kylo pauses, considering continuing, and he does. “I have trouble sleeping. Nightmares. So I end up reading.”
Rey could understand that more than she wanted to.
“I usually watch movies,” Rey says. “When I can’t sleep, I mean. I go through phases with bad dreams. Usually when I’m stressed out, or not stressed out enough.”
“I know what you mean,” Kylo says dryly.
“Do you dream about the war?”
“Yes.” Kylo’s gaze doesn’t change, until his head tilts curiously. “What do you dream about, Rey?”
“Oh, stupid shit,” she smiles. “Bad memories from when I was little. Stuff nobody likes to think about. But sometimes I have dreams about flying planes. Those ones are fun.”
“You need to dream more about driving safe,” Kylo — dare she say — teases.
Rey’s smile grows. “Do you even own a car?”
“Yeah, I do. It’s under a tarp until the snow melts.”
“Very useful.”
“That’s what the snowmobile is for.”
“Says the man with no phone.”
Kylo’s eyes narrow coyly. “I’d recall whose home you’re in, little girl.”
“Little girl?” Rey is actually affronted. “And you’re the one who dragged me in here.”
“That I am. And I’ll see to your good health.”
Rey reddens petulantly. “You’re so...”
“So what, Rey?”
“Nothing,” she grouses, crossing her arms as sits on his bed. “I didn’t say anything.”
Kylo smirks, the first time she’s seen it, and the way it crooks on his face makes her heart flip.
Rey swallows thickly, looking away. Jesus, she needed to get out of here.
Except she kinda didn’t want to.
—
Rey wakes up one morning to an empty cabin.
The air is warm and still. Too still. Too quiet. She frantically sits up in bed, gazing around the long room and taking in the small kitchen, the dining table, the beat-up couch he’d been sleeping on. There is no Kylo in sight.
Rey doesn’t know why panic trickles into her veins, but it does, and it spurns her out of bed. She wobbles on her feet from her haste, and heads toward a window to see if she can see anything past the impossible wall of white.
Of course she can’t. They’re still snowed in.
By the grace of the universe, the door knob jiggles, startling Rey. When the door blasts open, snow coming in with it, Kylo joins the precipitation dripping from his hair. He shakes it out like a dog, peeling off his hat and scarf before giving Rey a confused, stern look.
“Why are you out of bed?” he asks.
“I—” Rey stammers, opening and shutting her mouth stupidly. “I was looking for you.”
Against all odds, Kylo softens at that. He takes off his gloves and coat, and from a pocket, he pulls out—
“My phone!”
“I was grabbing it. Figured we should get it charged while it was quieter out.”
As promised, Kylo hooks up her phone to the charger from her backpack. Thank god it had been in there. Rey waits patiently as the battery refills, and in the meantime, curls up on the bed.
Kylo’s copy of whatever he was reading is sitting on the table. It gives Rey an idea.
“Would you mind reading to me while my phone charges?” she asks, hesitant.
Kylo blinks once, then considers her words. “My book?” he asks.
“Yeah,” Rey nods, “that sounds kinda nice.”
Kylo doesn’t need to be asked twice. Rey settles into the quilts on the mattress, facing Kylo on his stool, and he flips to his bookmark to start reading from the page.
His reading voice is just as pleasant as his speaking. He doesn’t do much of character voices, and he reads at a steady, entrancing pace. Rey doesn’t understand anything going on, can’t follow a single plotline or person, but it’s soothing, nonetheless. She almost feels like a child.
Come to think of it, no one had ever read to her before.
Rey’s eyes grow heavy as she smiles herself to sleep.
—
The phone has no signal.
Rey didn’t know why she expected otherwise. They didn’t have internet, either, due to the weather apparently, so she was stuck with an expensive and near-useless piece of technology.
At least she could play her tile game.
“The snow started slowing down,” Kylo announces the next day, during her moping session. “We should have internet soon.”
That’s a bittersweet fact. Rey found that despite her persistent headache and embarrassing lump on her head, staying with Kylo had been profoundly therapeutic. The peace and quiet was unlike anything she had experienced before, and with three square meals a day, she felt safe and warm. Somehow, she wasn’t even that sad about missing her cabin reservation.
It was... nice not to be alone.
Kylo’s premonition comes true, and sure enough, there’s a few weak bars of internet by that evening. Rey’s notifications come in at a crawl, and she manages to send out a few short texts to Finn and Poe, and Rose — heyyy, got stuck in a storm and have been waiting it out with a good samaritan lol. Im okay i missed my reservation but ill be home in a few days. xx — before receiving concerned, caring replies and promising that all would be fine. No need to worry then with the car stuff just yet.
With that, a weight is lifted from her shoulders. She slumps onto the floor with relief.
“Glad that’s handled,” she breathes out.
“Hungry?” Kylo sort-of congratulates her.
“Starving. Did you make bread?” Kylo made very good fresh bread.
He smirks. “I did.”
Rey tears into the food like an animal. His cooking was the pinnacle of hearty and homemade and each meal healed something in her.
—
After days of being trapped in a sea of ice and powder, Rey looks out the window, and realizes she’s actually looking out the window.
She scurries over to it, gazing out at the endless expanse of clear white dappled with tree trunks. She could just make out the faint, snowed over path that Kylo had used to leave the cabin and head out to her car and the rest of the world. It had worn to just a vague divot.
“It’s so pretty,” Rey says absently, and Kylo snorts from behind her.
“You almost died in a car accident from black ice and you think the snow is pretty.”
“I grew up in a desert.”
Kylo softens. “Fair enough.”
It wouldn’t be much longer here, Rey thinks. There’s an ache that comes with it. It wasn’t even the dreading the tasks she’d have to go through — towing her car, getting a ride home, spending all that money that was supposed to be spent on her holiday — it was just... leaving Kylo.
She felt despondent thinking about leaving him here all alone, no matter that he had been here a decade on his own already. It seemed wrong. He wasn’t some socially inept pariah. He was just... troubled, she suspected, and dealing with some well-earned PTSD.
They were more alike than she thought, Rey muses.
“The desert is cruel,” Kylo comments, seemingly out of nowhere, and there’s a faraway look in his eye. “It’s a harsh environment for a soldier, let alone a child.”
Rey remembers the heat. The scalding, dry, suffocating heat. She was permanently tanned or burnt as a kid, and covered in freckles. It was part of what made the cold so acceptable — at least it wasn’t that heat.
“I don’t envy you,” Rey says, “the desert is hard for a kid, but going for deployment...”
“Yeah, well. We got out.”
Rey half-smiles. “We did.”
Kylo stares at Rey with a look she can’t parse. It’s almost tender, if she allows herself to think so. She tilts her head at him, curious, and he leans in slightly.
Then, he pulls away, and Rey’s heart is racing.
“I’ll make tea,” Kylo says abruptly, “and we can read more if you want.”
Rey finds herself nodding, cheeks red. She turns away to pat them and hide them.
“Sure,” she says, “I’d like that.”
And that becomes their routine, every single night. Kylo makes them tea an hour after dinner, and breaks out his book to recite to her. Rey lays in his bed, drenched in his scent and the smell of campfire, and listens to the words as they wash over her.
Her head hurts less every day. And the lump goes down and down.
Before she knows it, it’s almost time to go.
—
There’s a tension in the air that Rey can’t explain. She knows it has to do with her leaving, but she can’t elaborate on it, and she can’t figure out how to fix it.
Nothing between them has been awkward, per se, and not even strained. There’s just this... undercurrent. An unspoken something.
All day, she catches Kylo staring at her. All day, she feels a rising sense of frenetic, flustered energy. Her skin feels static.
For the fifth time that day, she accidentally bumps into him as she squeezes into the kitchen for a glass of water. She apologizes, and Kylo instinctively grabs her to brace her, ensure she doesn’t fall.
“Sorry,” he murmurs, and for a moment, they’re inches from each other, pressed to each other between the small countertops.
His mouth looks so full and inviting. The way he speaks, even, is mesmerizing. She wants... to kiss him.
Rey blushes fervently and inhales her water.
She can’t stop thinking about it all day. She hasn’t kissed anyone in forever, but the idea of him grips her like a spider’s web, tangles her thoughts in it. It’s hard to make eye contact.
Part of her knows she’s never going to see him again. It feels like something important is slipping through her fingers, and she’s helpless to stop it. She tries to bargain with herself, tries to come up with a way they could stay in touch — mail, maybe? — but he’s been alone this long and there was no way she could come along and ruin that.
So that night, she compromises. They had drank their tea and read his book, and it was getting late.
She had taken his bed from him long enough, anyway.
“Kylo,” Rey says, unsurely, “are you cold?”
Kylo raises a brow at the question. “No. Are you?”
“Yes,” she lies, just a little. “It’s been cold at night.”
“I don’t have any extra blankets,” Kylo frowns. “I’ll give you mine.”
“No,” Rey blurts out, “I mean. We could share.”
“The blanket?”
“No,” Rey says again, cringing, “I mean the bed.”
Kylo stares at her as her words tick through his head in understanding. Slowly, he nods.
“Okay,” he says, like it makes sense. “We can do that.”
Rey doesn’t know what to do after that. Awkwardly, she shuffles and smiles, heading towards the bed to take the side by the wall. She preferred it.
Kylo takes a moment to use the restroom, and when he comes back, wastes no time in lifting up the covers and sliding in beside her. She’s lucky he indulged in a larger bed, because there was no way they could have squeezed onto anything smaller together.
Just like before, his knees knock against the back of hers, and she feels the broad, hot wall of his chest line up behind her back. He was built like a furnace. Rey sighs inwardly, relieved at the sensation deep into her bones.
“Better?” Kylo asks roughly.
Rey nods. Then, carefully, she takes her hand in his and gently drapes it around her waist.
“Is this okay?” she asks.
Kylo grunts in affirmation.
They were both dressed, to her dismay, but this was good. This was... really nice.
The room is dark and warm, only a meager light flickering from the fire. All the candles had been blown out. Everything feels secret and safe.
Surreptitiously, Rey scoots back into Kylo, trying to line up her body more snugly with his. Her ass unintentionally meets his crotch, and she freezes before forcing herself to relax and act like nothing happened.
Except something does.
Slowly, she feels something stiff grow against her. Her heart pounds at a ridiculous rate as she realizes what it is, and there’s a flustered glee in her chest, making her insides fluttery.
But Kylo hasn’t said a word. He might be pretending nothing is happening, either. From the sounds of his breathing, he’s definitely not asleep.
Then, he shifts, and Rey takes it as permission to shift, too.
Just once, she nudges her ass back against him. A slow, slight roll. If he wanted to think she was getting comfortable, he could.
His grip on her waist tightens.
Imperceptibly, she feels his erection dig just so into her. Just the slightest roll of his own hips. Rey swallows thickly, her heart in her throat.
Rey gingerly reaches down and rests her hand on top of his. She runs her fingertips along his rough knuckles, barely there, but encouraging.
And she juts back into him again.
Kylo breathes in deep and sharp behind her, and releases a low, almost growl. Rey goes still, and knows she is irrevocably caught.
But he squeezes her hip this time, and her hand tightens on top of his.
“You don’t owe me anything, Rey,” Kylo’s voice murmurs against her ear.
Rey instantly shakes her head. “But I want to,” she whispers back.
There is a short beat — the fire crackles in the distance — and then the hand on her hip cups her chin, turning her head around so his lips can slant across hers in a searing kiss.
Rey gasps against his mouth. Kylo wastes no time in sliding his tongue against the seam, licking past her teeth and drawing against her own tongue. It’s a losing fight, and he dominates her mouth summarily, tasting every part of it before breaking away with a string of saliva between them.
He’s panting hard, still cupping her chin, and leans in again.
Rey kisses him for an eternity, acquainting herself with his mouth and everything it had to offer. The kiss brands into her brain, shutting off all her logical thoughts until she’s a melted pile of cream. When his hand releases her, it travels down the length of her throat, down her collarbone before dipping under her t-shirt and up her belly to her breasts.
Kylo takes one in his hand, squeezing it and massaging it before rolling a thumb over a nipple. Rey keens into his mouth, unable to form another coherent thought except about never doing anything but kissing him ever again. She didn’t know how long she had lived without it.
“My tube is snipped,” Kylo informs her, kissing across her cheek and jaw, “and I don’t have condoms.”
“I have an implant,” Rey affirms, not remotely worried.
“Good,” Kylo says, and suddenly his thumb is in her mouth and he’s prying it open to kiss her again.
When he finishes with her mouth, he moves down her neck, leaving a trail of messy bites and licks and kisses as Rey writhes around to face him better. She doesn’t know when her shirt comes off, only that it does, and he’s not wearing one, either.
She takes the opportunity to run her hands all over the smooth planes of his chest, solid as rock and rippling subtly with muscle.
“You’re so strong,” she mumbles, almost salivating.
Kylo scoffs. “You’re cute.”
Rey blushes despite herself.
One hand snakes into her underwear, and she already knows she’s soaked. She tries not to be too embarrassed as his fingers meet no resistance, just hot juices, and he groans into her hair as he does.
The fingers toy with her lips, then flick up to pet her clit. Rey almost bucks at the contact; she hadn’t masturbated in over a week at this point, and she hadn’t had someone touch her there, well, ever. It felt fucking incredible. She didn’t know anything could feel that good.
Insistent, Kylo’s fingers remain, rubbing firm circles into her clit, back and forth, to and fro. Rey can’t hold it together. Her fingers scramble to hold onto something, anything, and they land on his broad shoulders, nails digging sweetly into his skin.
“Kylo,” she gasps, trying to catch her breath, “it feels — it feels—”
“Tell me,” Kylo commands. “Tell me how good it feels, Rey.”
“Sooo— fuck— so fucking good.”
As a reward, she thinks, his fingers — two of them — find their way to her entrance. They press to the hole before pushing past it, a tight, perfect squeeze that has Rey seeing stars. She whines lowly, trying to grind deeper onto them.
“Please,” she begs, and Kylo chuckles before crooking his fingers up, stroking the perfect spot inside of her.
Rey bucks for real this time, arching slightly off the bed. She chants his name over and over embarrassingly as he begins driving his digits in and out of her, lewd noises coming from her slickness.
She isn’t going to last at this rate. There’s a coiling, bright pleasure in her belly that’s rapidly rising, and Rey can’t hold it in.
“Fuck,” she swears, “Kylo— Kylo, I’m—!”
“Do it,” he orders, “cum.”
It’s like a string snaps. Something in her gives way, and plunges her into the depths of bliss as wave after clenching wave devours her. Her pussy squeezes around his fingers, and her orgasm subsides slowly.
Rey comes to with her head spinning, this time not just from the stupid concussion.
“Can I have you?” Kylo asks softly, wanting permission. Rey nods with a mortifying haste.
“Please,” she begs, “please.”
Kylo gingerly crawls over top of her, lining up the head of his cock to her wet curls. He leans down on one elbow, kissing her face once before sinking in the tip.
Rey already feels good from just that, and an overwhelming urge for more overtakes her.
“More,” she pleads, “please.”
Kylo acquiesces. Every inch of him crams inside of her, all at once, and the breath is stolen from Rey. It’s so full, so fucking full and heavenly and good, and she can’t process anything but how right it is to have him inside of her. No one had ever done this before. It was better than any toy she owned.
“Rey,” Kylo rasps out, voice thick. “You feel incredible.”
Rey blushes, “S-so do you.”
That’s all the permission he needs to fuck her. His strong hips pick up a brutal pace, sharp and short and hard, and Rey finds herself bouncing back on the bed like a doll as he takes her. His cock fills all of her and drives in and out repeatedly, sending electric pulses through every atom of her body.
Kylo’s pace grows choppy quickly. She can feel the way his dick grows even more rigid, and suddenly, a quiet whimper comes from his chest as he goes still and then pulls out, hot strings of his cum spreading out across her belly.
He had cum really fast.
Rey finds herself grinning, beaming ear-to-ear.
“Fuck,” he mumbles, “I’m sorry. I haven’t— it’s been— I promise I can do better, I just...”
“It’s okay,” Rey hushes him, “I’m flattered!”
Kylo gives her a crooked, shameless smile for the first time she’s ever seen.
“Let me get you a towel.”
Kylo disappears only momentarily before returning with a damp rag, which Rey appreciates more than words — she got to stare at his whole anatomy, including his ass, as he walked around naked. And the rag was very, very sweet.
He crawls back into bed with Rey, this time wrapping his arms around her and pulling her in close. His face buries against her neck, and he sighs.
“You smell good,” he says into her skin.
“So do you,” Rey agrees, melting into him.
She doesn’t even remember falling asleep. Just waking up to hands traveling around her thighs and ass.
“Mmph?” she grumbles, not displeased at the awakening. She didn’t know what time it was.
“I want to eat you out,” Kylo admits bluntly in the dark.
Rey’s eyes shoot open. Oh. Oh!
“Are you sure?” she asks warily. She didn’t think guys liked doing that kind of thing.
“Please.”
The single word contains so much emotion she can’t say no.
“Okay,” she says unsurely, “if you’re sure.”
“As sure as my rifle is my best friend,” Kylo drawls. “Lay back, darlin’.”
Rey’s heart hiccups at the sentiment, and she quickly obeys. Kylo makes quick work of diving under the quilt to nestle between her legs, prying them open and pulling apart her lips with his fingertips.
His arms are strong around her thighs, pinning them in place. And then his mouth surrounds her.
Rey groans deeply, tossing her head back as pleasure begins simmering up her nerves. His teeth graze her clit before his tongue begins persistently lapping at it, slow and steady, determined. Kylo eats her out with a profound patience, and it’s enough to make her actually relax and let the sensations wash over her.
His tongue circles her clit. Then, he sucks.
Rey gasps, never having felt anything like it in her life. Her body trembles and shakes, nails tearing into the sheets, and Kylo hums into her as he suckles harder, more.
She doesn’t know how much time passes, just that she can feel the tight band in her belly encroaching towards its edge. He maintains his technique and pace, and her thighs clamp around his head as she lurches off the bed.
“Fuck,” she swears, and her vision goes perfectly white. Hot electricity shoots through her veins as her climax crushes over her, her pussy throbbing around nothing. As it fades, her hands scramble to push Kylo’s face away as she grows oversensitive.
Kylo is smirking as he pulls away, wiping at his chin. “You’re delicious.”
Rey is pink-cheeked, still trying to catch her breath. “Y-you’re welcome.”
“Indeed. Thank you.” Kylo licks his lips shamelessly. “Go back to sleep. It’s not morning yet.”
—
Morning comes, as it always does.
They had agreed that today would be the day he’d drive her back into town, call a tow truck, and get her a cab home. She’s alone when she opens her eyes in bed, but the sheets are still warm. There’s footsteps, and she cranes her head to see Kylo up and dressed, just like the first night she’d stayed, and pouring himself a glass of water in the kitchen.
When he turns around, their eyes meet, and she can’t read his expression. It’s neutral. Impenetrable.
“Good morning,” he says.
“Mornin’,” she says. Her head may still feel sore at certain angles, but her entire body feels loose and lovely for the first time in forever. She hoped... everything was okay, though. That he wasn’t upset with her.
That he didn’t regret what they did.
Rey glances away, suddenly having doubts. She hadn’t been too forceful, had she? Did she take advantage of his kindness?
Her face grows hot with imagined shame.
“Did you sleep well?” Kylo asks. It’s the first time he’s asked. That was touching.
Rey nods. “I slept great. Did you?”
Kylo gives her a long, searching look. “I did, actually. No nightmares.”
Rey smiles again. “That’s good. I’m happy. I’m... really happy.”
“You don’t regret it?” Kylo asks softly, and he can’t look at her as he says it.
Rey almost bristles, but her heart shivers more strongly. She couldn’t imagine a single universe where she would. Never in a million years. Even with her car fucked up and her vacation derailed, this was so stupidly important to her.
She shakes her head furiously before she can get too emotional. “No,” she says, “I don’t. Do you?”
“No,” Kylo says bluntly. “I want more, Rey.”
Rey perks up at the words. Wide-eyed, she scoops up sheets to cover herself with as she sits up in bed. “Really?”
“Yeah. Is that okay?”
“Yes.”
Kylo crosses the room in four large strides, tearing his shirt off over his head and tossing it to the ground. Rey braces herself for the heaviness of his kiss that comes down on her, consuming her entirely.
Within a few minutes of ravaging her mouth, leaving it swollen with kisses, he’s tucking down and under the sheets again to bury his face in her cunt. Rey is still sensitive from the night before, and he uses his tongue desperately to drive her towards the edge and over it again, pulsing with juices as she cums quickly.
He didn’t appear to mind her being a pillow princess, either, due to her healing injury. In fact, he seemed to insist on her remaining sprawled out and comfortable while he did as he pleased.
He pushes her legs back, spreading her open for him. His fingers push her pussy apart, too, making room for him to stick his cockhead against her entrance and rub up and down. It was slippery from both spit and her wetness, and before she knew it, he was slipping it back inside of her tightly.
“Oh,” Rey chokes out, getting a head rush from the sensation.
Kylo stares down at her, strained with pleasure. His hands tangle into hers, and he starts to move.
This was different than last night. His strokes were measured and sure, less messy and frantic. He takes care with each position he wrangles her into, always taking care of her head, but ensuring that each plunge hit that sweet mark inside of her cavern.
Rey is glad nobody is around for miles, because she’s screaming his name.
This time, too, he reaches down with one hand, rubbing at her swollen clit to bring her back to the height of writhing pleasure. Rey’s head scrambles at the touch, molten heat rising up in her core as the dual sensations start to overtake her.
“Kylo,” she pleads and whines, at a loss for words. She just wanted him, in every single way possible.
“Rey,” he growls back tenderly. “Feel good?”
“I’mgonna—”
When she cums, her whole body convulsing with the lightning it brings, Kylo leans down and kisses her furiously, taking her breath away. Everything she feels and smells and hears is him.
And then Kylo draws back, and presses back inside of her again. Her walls were swollen and newly sensitive from her orgasm, and the motion felt exquisite and dizzying.
“Rey,” he says, kissing her cheeks, “can I cum inside of you?”
Rey shakes her head yes immediately. She was still regaining her full consciousness, but if anything, she was surprised he hadn’t last night — it was... polite of him. For a hermit, he was still rather a gentleman.
Kylo smiles faintly, then resumes ravishing her.
It doesn’t take long for him to reach the edge again. He was holding back, she could tell, and his rhythm descends into that messy, choppy pace that she knows means he’s close.
“Kylo,” she whispers, arms wrapped roughly around his neck, “you feel really good.”
“Mmngh,” Kylo snarls, and his head drops to her shoulder. “Fuck.”
That’s all it takes. He stills, but this time, he doesn’t pull out. Rey feels the unfamiliar, erotic sensation of hot seed spilling into her, coating her insides, and is surprised at how much she enjoys it.
Kylo collapses beside her, breathing hard, but has more than enough strength to yank her against his chest. Rey happily allows it. She wants nothing more than to lay there like that for a too-short eternity, warm in his arms, safe.
From here, his heartbeat is quick but even as it slows back to normal, and so are his deep breaths.
But eventually, the spell must be broken. Kylo murmurs, “Do you need to shower?”
Rey blushes — no, she did not want to shower. She wanted to stay like this forever. She felt... closer to him. She meekly shakes her head no, and doesn’t elaborate.
They have to get up inevitably. She tries not to think about leaving when she freshens up in the bathroom, though, and gets dressed properly for the first time in ages. She’d been living in her lounge set and pajamas and a few of Kylo’s t-shirts for the last week.
“Got everything?” Kylo asks, and he doesn’t sound upset, but he doesn’t sound... happy.
Rey thinks she understands.
“I think so,” she says, forlorn.
Even though they’re going to be in his Jeep, he still puts an extra coat on her and wraps his scarf around her neck. Just in case.
“Alright,” Kylo says. “Let’s go.”
—
It’s a two hour drive to the nearest town, and an hour until Rey gets signal again.
Rey sends a few update texts to her friends — finally on my way home from holiday lol — and folds her hands in her lap. They had stopped by her car to grab a few more things out of it, and got straight back on the road. Kylo doesn’t turn the radio on, and doesn’t say a word.
Rey tries to make conversation a few times, but Kylo doesn’t seem to be in a good mood. Deep down, she has the funny feeling he’s ghosting her; they were never going to see each other again after this, so why should he pretend to keep enjoying her company?
Maybe the sex was just sex. Maybe he was just that lonely, and she had come along at the right, or wrong, time.
Maybe she had been a burden.
Rey wills her eyes not to water, and they don’t.
They make it to town. Rey calls a tow truck and offers the coordinates, and surprisingly, Kylo promises he’ll meet the tower and make sure her car gets taken care of.
All that’s left to do is call a very expensive Uber.
“Kylo,” Rey says, and she desperately hopes her voice doesn’t crack, “I wanted to say thank you for everything. You saved my life. And... more than that, you’re a good person.”
Kylo’s expression is carefully blank as he nods. Not a single emotion is betrayed in his eyes, but he stares at her deeply, and she can feel the simmering weight of something unspoken behind it.
“It was no problem,” he says, finally. “Goodbye, Rey. Be safe.”
Rey is going to cry. She smiles briefly and waves farewell before quickly turning away to hide her eyes. Just in time, a clean SUV pulls up with her driver.
Kylo gets her door for her, and she can’t look at him. Her bag goes in the trunk, and her door shuts with finality.
When the vehicle drives away, Rey turns back to gaze out the window. His tall figure stands in the distance, watching her, too, as they each become smaller and smaller, further and further away, until they turn a corner and he's gone.