Chapter Text
“I can’t do it, Garak. Another epic. And let me guess, everyone dies,” said Julian in a huff. He still tucked the rod into his trouser pocket though. He’d read it, but he wouldn't be happy about it.
“Of course, everyone dies. Death is inevitable and a fitting end to the novel,” Garak said with a dismissive wave of his hand. “But it’s the journey where the real lessons lie.”
The lunch hour was winding down and only dredges of their tea sat between them, empty plates stacked and pushed to the side.
“Yes, another cliche, another parable of virtuous Cardassia. But where is the fun? The adventure?”
“Fun, Doctor? You can’t expect to learn something of value from fun,” Garak took a sip of his tea though it was likely cold. Placing the glass down demurely, and with an innocent look on his face, he continued. “Not everything can be like your insipid holosuite stories.”
Julian twitched. So what if he’d been spending more time in the holosuites lately? Why did that bother Garak so much? To live out fantasies where the hero wins and gets the girl in the end. Was it so terrible to dream of a world where no one dies except the one-dimensional bad guy?
Julian took a deep breath and stared. He could be the bigger man, he could. “Do you want to come to the holosuites with me one day? Felix sent me a new story and it should be anything but insipid.”
It might be the wrong decision to invite Garak. After all, spy stories, especially the ones Julian enjoyed, were far flung from reality. How could he comfortably play pretend with a real spy turned struggling exile next to him? Which was one of the reasons Julian didn’t invite Garak the first time around. It must be like rubbing salt into the gaping, proverbial wound.
As if reading his mind, Garak’s eyes narrowed. “I have other things to do, Doctor. And remember how last time went. I’d prefer to avoid a repeat performance.”
Garak then proceeded to rub the spot along his neck ridge where Julian had shot him.
The reminder of the incident in the holosuite also brought back the wriggling squirm of guilt Julian hadn't fully removed. His palm felt heavy. Warm. Right where the pistol handle had been. He could still see the look in the Cardassian’s blue eyes. Shock, awe, and something else Julian still couldn't find a word for.
Julian had intended for it to be a flesh wound. It was a warning shot to prove just how serious he was about saving his friends trapped in the holosuite’s memory storage. Still, he also knew that the sensitivity of Cardassian neck cartilage couldn’t be understated.
At the time, Garak had been hurt without a doubt, but to act as if it still ached after all this time…. Julian rolled his eyes.
“You're the one who broke in, uninvited.” Julian took a calming breath. “It will be different this time. What are the chances of another transporter accident?”
Garak opened his mouth to counter, but Julian pushed on. “Or we could do another story. There’s this archeological one with a rogue professor character I’ve been meaning to—.”
Garak raised his hand, cutting Julian off firmly. “I’ll leave that all to you, Doctor. Maybe another time.”
And that was that.
———
Actually, no it wasn’t.
For the next few days, Julian continued to think about the conversation. During work hours, it would play in the back of his mind. Even in the holosuite, chasing the holo-version of Falcon around wasn’t half as exhilarating as it should be.
Well, he couldn’t be blamed for it really. Loneliness was an insidious thing. As a doctor, Julian knew better than most the mental impact loneliness could have on an individual. Lonely wormed its way into every facet of life Julian had once found comfort or solace in.
When he was younger, the desire for companionship was outweighed by his need to protect himself and his secrets. Then that burden didn't seem to matter as much when medical research and a new scientific paper beckoned for his attention.
And up until a few years ago, his date's lack of conversational acrobatics was fine when they were oh so very flexible in other ways. But, he had to admit it. Physical stimulation was a salve, but not a cure. Playing the field had simply lost its luster.
He was introspective enough and attended enough counseling sessions to recognize he was masking, but after all these years it was simply a part of who he was. And unlike his youth full of keeping people at arm’s length with annoying charm, Julian now had friends, real honest-to-God companions to share his time with.
And yet the feeling of being adrift, all alone at sea never really left him.
It only felt worse this past month. Miles wasn’t able to meet for darts the last two Thursdays, and while talking (or really gossiping) with Dax at the bar was always a fun time, Worf had been more monosyllabic than usual. Of course, when the very visible brain of Captain Boday swayed into frame from across the dabo table, Julian knew immediately why and made his excuses to head home.
Still, the conversation with Garak nagged at him. The man broke into his holosuite to see what he was up to, but now after actually being invited, he wanted nothing to do with it. And Julian didn’t want to read the damn Epic of Legate Talek, but if it was the only way to have some decent conversation he would do it.
So that night, Julian sped through the very long first few chapters. It was much later than intended when he sent a message to Garak.
“Lunch tomorrow?” Julian quickly typed out a follow-up message on his PADD hoping to make it more enticing. "I read all about Legate Talek’s great-great-great grandfather and his cousin. A strange choice for the start.”
The message hadn’t even sat there for a minute before a prompt reply arrived.
“Unfortunately, I am booked through lunch.”
Julian sighed and let the PADD drop to his chest. Rolling over, he stared at Kukalaka who sat on the edge of the bedside table. Then a beep of a new message had him scrambling to lift the PADD from beneath him.
“The Legate’s family is important to the story, but I do understand if you would rather not continue. Don’t read it on my account.”
Julian tapped out a reply. “You’re right. I hate it. But if we can’t do lunch, we could do something else?”
It took a few minutes, but Garak replied. “What do you have in mind, Doctor?”
Julian racked his brain and then smiled. “I have a holovid I’ve been meaning to rewatch. It’s an Earth classic.”
“I hesitate to guess what is defined as an Earth classic, but I am willing to try. 2100 hours?”
Julian sent a quick “Yes, great.” Then threw the PADD in the chair across the room to not overthink it and continue sending messages into the night. He reached out, scooped up Kukalaka, and grinned into his pillow.
He was going to watch his favorite fictional spy film with his favorite spy.
———
Julian wondered if exposing Garak to the world of James Bond was a mistake. Maybe he should have suggested they play Kotra instead. Or just talked about the stupid Legate.
He was hoping ancient Earth films about antiquated spies would be more amusing to Garak than triggering. It wasn’t the games of the holosuite, but it should be a novel experience. Since Julian had seen the film before, any commentary Garak would undoubtedly give could be a welcome way to see the movie with fresh eyes.
He had red-leaf tea set up and a few snacks. The holovid system was already paused and ready to play. Still, Julian was jittery like he’d drank too many raktajinos when his door chimed at 2100 hours on the dot. He’d seen Garak thousands of times, there was no logical reason to be nervous. As Julian led Garak over to the couch, he filled the silence by giving a hurried background on the movie, Dr. No.
“The first movie is over 400 years old and it isn’t my favorite, but if I rewatch, I like to start at the beginning.”
“It’s a series?” Garak asked and took a seat on the right side of the couch, giving a glance at Kukalaka who sat in the middle.
“Oh yes, over sixty movies. The franchise fizzled out right before Earth’s World War III. It has been rebooted twice since then, but it just isn't the same so I only watch the old ones.”
“And how many do you watch out of the sixty or so?”
Julian laughed. “About all of them, but not so often in the last few years. It’s been busy, as you know.”
“Ah yes, busy. We can call it that I suppose.”
“But it’s comforting so I like to watch them. Hopefully, I can explain anything that comes up. It’s set in the 1960s so some things are even outside of my scope.”
“I trust that you will explain it just fine, Doctor.”
Julian nodded with a smile and clicked play.
It wasn’t long into the beginning sequence that Garak let out a little huff of laughter and Julian looked over at him. “I see, this is what that holosuite adventure was based on. The cut of that suit is quite nice.”
If Julian had any worry of boring the Cardassian, he was wrong. Garak watched intently, sipping slowly on his red-leaf tea and sighing occasionally with irritation as James Bond sauntered along. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t still full of critique.
“If this is an example of human spycraft,” said Garak eventually as James flirted his way out of a situation. “Then it’s surprising humans made it this far at all as a species.”
Julian grinned. “It’s fiction with some kernels of truth in it. The author was a spy in Earth’s World War II.”
Garak mumbled something under his breath, but his eyes stayed glued.
While James Bond flirted with his dear Miss Moneypenny, it would be the perfect time for Julian to slip his arm around his date's shoulders. Ride on Bond's coattails to introduce the whisper of a caress. But this wasn't a date and actually, Julian had never watched these films with a date ever. He had never shared this with anyone unless he counted Kukalaka who sat between them as a protective shield of sorts. Because they were just two friends and a bear spending time together. Platonic time.
Kukalaka was now closer to Julian since he couldn't resist fidgeting with the worn left ear of the bear. They watched the movie with the occasional interjections from the ex-spy and Julian’s defensive retorts for Bond’s actions (even though he did agree half the time with Garak, but he’d never tell him that). Also, Julian was compelled to explain anything historical or contextual for Garak's benefit.
As the evening wore on, Julian was more content than he had been in a long, long time.
And when Honey Ryder emerged from the water in the holovid, Julian didn't feel the same thrill he usually did at her lithe form. Instead, his eyes drifted to Garak washed in the dim glow of the holovid.
Only to watch his reaction, of course.