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‘This wasn’t the plan.’ Mipha frowned as she looked at the woman wrapped in her arms.
She had never liked the idea of the whole drowning-after-sex thing, but she thought it would be easier when it was time to do it. She had never been able to do the seducing thing either. She tried, but could never get herself to call out to the sailors. But calling to this one, this beautiful woman, had been easier. Not easy, per se, but doable. She thought back to that evening, just hours before.
She was short, blonde, and thin but not gangly (perhaps because she was so short). She was almost as short as Mipha was, which was saying quite a bit. Her boat was small and old, but in good shape. It had been well taken care of. Humans didn’t age as slowly as sirens did, she didn’t think, but she looked about her age. Somewhere around early adulthood, though for humans that was much younger.
She had never called out to a sailor before, no matter how hard she tried. She just couldn’t get her voice to work, couldn’t get her harp to play nicely when she strummed it, and couldn’t find it in herself to smile.
She didn’t feel any braver than usual. But she really, really wanted to see more of this sailor. For the first time, she wanted to call out.
She took a deep breath and cleared her throat, then sang a song she had been practicing her whole life. She was pretty sure it would translate to the sailor’s language when she heard it. She hoped it still rhymed.
“Oh sailor, so lonesome, out on your ship. Your boat is so sexy and your muscles gleam in the sunlight. You are probably tired and haven’t had sex with anyone in a long time because you’re at sea, but that can change if you come over to this beach. I promise I won’t drown you.”
When she heard her, her pointed ears twitched. She rushed over to the side of her boat and searched for the voice. She looked enchanted, but not aroused. Mipha wondered if she had done something wrong. This song was supposed to be irresistible.
“Are you okay?” the woman waved, shouting from her boat. “Are you stranded on this beach?”
Ah. She was concerned for her. She was being kind. Mipha didn’t think humans did that.
“I’m alright,” she called back. “I, um… just please listen to my song and then do whatever you wish to do because of it!”
She didn’t seem to understand. “How long have you been out in the sun? You look really sunburned. Here, I’ll be right over.”
‘Ah,’ Mipha thought, surprised, ‘She’s a gentlewoman. I didn’t know humans could be that.’
She steered her boat to the shore and docked it, rushing but still making sure she didn’t crash. She ran over and kneeled on the sand. She put her hand on Mipha’s forehead. “Your skin is really pink, but it isn’t dry and hot. It’s weirdly wet.”
“Yes, it’s meant to be that way. Both pink and wet.” She wished she would just fall for her already. Maybe she should resume her song and harp. As beautiful and kind as this woman was, she really wanted to do her job.
“Your speech is normal. You aren’t convulsing… ” She went to sing some more, but the woman took her head in her hands and looked in her mouth. “Your tongue isn’t… wow, that’s a lot of teeth.”
She took a moment to process what she was seeing, then let go of her. “Oh.”
Mipha took the opportunity to strum and sing. “Oh sailor, so lonesome, out on your ship. Your boat is so sexy and your muscles gleam in the sunlight. You are—”
“Are you a siren?” She didn’t look alarmed. She looked excited. “Oh, I’ve always wanted to meet a siren! I thought you would promise me forbidden knowledge like you did in the legends, but I suppose you’re a different siren than the myths’. Do you really have a thousand teeth? Do you really lure sailors to their deaths? Is that what you were doing to me? Do you know forbidden knowledge from eons ago? Do you have seductive powers?”
Mipha frowned. She answered only the last question. “I thought I did. They don’t seem to be working.”
The woman blushed, but her excitement did not waver. She looked Mipha up and down. She seemed to notice her nudity for the first time. “Oh! Oh, I see. Um… yes, I would like to do that. Very much so. But do you promise not to drown me until I’ve asked all my questions? I really, really want forbidden knowledge. I’m a historian, you see. My name is Zelda. Well, I want to be. Want to be a historian. I am already named Zelda. That isn’t a wish of mine, just a fact. I… er, I won’t bore you with my life’s story. But I will need to write everything down and send it back to my kingdom.”
Mipha considered this. “Yes, alright. That sounds reasonable.”
The woman—Zelda—took off her numerous belts, then her shirt. Her breasts were very different than Mipha’s, and she couldn’t help but stare. “What are those things? The round, pointy bits on your breasts?”
Zelda looked down. “Those are my nipples.”
“What do they do?”
“Um, mine don’t really do anything. But they’re meant to be used to nurse our young.”
“Like a dolphin?”
“Yes, just like that!”
“Yours are prettier than a dolphin’s,” she felt shy, but spoke anyway. “I like them.”
“Thank you! I grew them myself.”
She took off her pants and leaned over Mipha. She kissed her, and at that moment, Mipha forgot all about the plan. Zelda wasn’t her prey anymore, but her lover. She stayed that way all night.
Mipha couldn’t bring herself to drown her, much less eat her heart. She didn’t think Zelda deserved it. She had been so kind, and if Mipha was being honest, very good at sex. She looked over at Zelda, sleeping soundly under the fading stars.
‘This wasn’t the plan,’ she thought. Despite her wishes not to, she couldn’t help but smile. ‘This is something much better.’