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Damian Wayne loves his parents, though that statement is far more broad and widespread than is normal for a traditional or even blended family. For some reason, the kid seemed to be eminently adoptable to any person with parental instincts. His specific mix of personality defects and traumas made seemingly every adult within a mile of him feel the feral need to parent him. Now, thirteen years into his life, Damian had somehow amassed an army of (depending on how you count) anywhere between six and nine parental figures in his life.
First of course, there was his mother and father, Talia al-Ghul and Bruce Wayne. Talia raised him alone for the first few years of his life, shielding him from as much abuse as she could from the hands of Ra’s. Then, Mother found Jason Ahki and took him in. he became a bodyguard, and after his recovery from the pit, a parental figure, teaching him about life outside the league, especially English and literature (also swears). Eventually, Jason left the league to complete his Red Hood fiasco, leaving Damian with just his mother again.
At ten, mother finally got the chance to send Damian away and sent him to live with father in Gotham. Things didn’t go well there at first. Damian was still a killer, no matter what shielding mother and Jason Ahki had done for him, and that was simply incongruous with his father’s expectations. They didn’t get much chance, though, as soon after father “died”, leaving Damian in the care of others.
During this time, Damian was adopted legally by Baba and Star Ummi, Richard Grayson, and Koriand’r. As well as spiritually, by Dada Alfred. Those three took care of Damian for a while, as well as Jason once his head was forcibly pulled from his ass, kicking and screaming by Damian, who just wanted his ahki back. Eventually, Jason started dating and then married Roy Ahki as well, bringing the total even higher.
His father eventually returned, their relationship improving and repairing over the months post-return. A new parent was added when Momma Cat, Selina Kyle, began seriously dating, and then married father, having his baby sister helena not long after. His mother also soon moved on, marrying Papa Slade Wilson, which was a very bizarre situation considering baba and papa’s on and off blood feud/ father son relationship depending on the day.
As if this family web wasn’t complicated enough, Damian also had to deal with the fucky sibling relationships this brought. Like how he was somehow simultaneously uncle, cousin, and sibling to Mar’i Grayson and Lian Harper, or the fact that he was both brother and nephew to Rose and Joseph Wilson, Tim Drake, Helena Wayne, and Cassandra Cain.
Now this whole situation was certainly a boon to Damian, who was quite possibly the safest kid in the world considering his parents are a mishmash of the two worlds' greatest assassins, a former British special forces soldier, the world's most notorious thief, three of the world's greatest unpowered heroes, and a literal alien. Safe to say anyone dating the kid would have a few hurdles to overcome. The downside was that custody was a fucking nightmare.
In the beginning it was chaos. Damian would go wherever the wind blew, showing up at random at that weeks favorite parent, or getting kidnapped by another set, this obviously led to many fights and to prevent the destruction of south jersey the justice league was called in.
Yes, you heard right. the fucking Justice League was called in to mediate a custody battle. Though considering the power these people held casually, it was more like an international incident waiting to occur. So, after much arguing, several fistfights, and enough broken tables to make a tables, ladders, and chairs match seem tame, a deal was struck.
Through a magically binding Superman-enforced deal between the parties, the following was agreed to. Regardless of who held custody at the time, Damian would call each set a minimum of once a week. Every week on Sunday, everyone would gather at Wayne Manor for a dinner. When under a specific parent’s custody, all training and patrolling are under the single discretion of that parent. Damian would continue schooling at Gotham Academy, and his parent would all make sure he actually showed up. At Damian’s request, visits to other households may occur for no more than 48 hours before he must return. Any kidnapping of the child will result in a call to Superman or a leaguer of similar (Flash one, not two (too biased to Richard) Wonder Woman, or a green lantern) strength to facilitate the return of Damian to the current custody holder. Any mission that has the potential to run through someone else's time must be approved by both sets of parents, and finally, after any major injury, Damian must be medically cleared by a third-party physician of the Justice League’s choosing (usually Mr. Terrific).
Generally, the rule was to go by seasons. Mother and Papa Slade (who had long since teamed up to kill Ra’s) in summer so as not to disturb his schooling. Baba and star Ummi in fall. Father, Mama Cat, and Dada Alfred in winter. And with the ahkis in spring. Now, this plan wasn’t perfect; it had several loopholes, kidnappings were less, though still rampant, and holidays were a nuclear waste dump that not even the Justice League was willing to touch. But it was overall fairly effective and had kept relative peace between all parties for the rest of Damian’s childhood.