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The sun was shining, birds were chirping. Life was good. Their second year at UA was done. Katsuki felt like he could finally catch a break. Maybe, just maybe, he could get some rest. Close his eyes for a bit without the fear of never opening them again, without feeling like his world was ending.
The summer sun was not scorching hot yet, he learned. Actually, it felt kind of nice. Like a warm hug he didn't have to return. The sun loved his skin without hurting him, seeped into his bones without burning him from the inside.
He used to hate the feeling. It always made him clammy, his quirk usually got out of hand, the heat messed with his mood. But, over the last two years, he came to love it. The rays on his skin felt less suffocating and more like something else, like someone else.
Summer days stopped feeling like a nuisance, instead they started looking like red hair shining like fire in the sunlight, like smiles too bright, laughs barely contained, days spent chasing the breeze and nights sitting in silent comfort, neither wanting the day to end.
It all started in the summer. Katsuki fell in love slowly, it wasn’t love at first sight, or soulmate bonds, or all the cliche love stories Katsuki has read about before. It was real, it was exciting like nothing he's ever felt before. It was terrifying, exhilarating. It made his heart race, and his head spin. It made him want to yell it from the tallest building, and whisper it into the night. He wanted to let the whole world know, and keep it all to himself. He wanted to hide it away in the darkest corner of his room, shove it in his chest and let the love grow under the sunlight gleaming from his heart.
They say love changes a man. Katsuki was no different. Love made him a poet. It made him yearn, made him hopeful. He filled notebooks after notebooks full of love letters, of poems which would never see the light of day again. He wrote them, kissed them goodbye before turning them to ash, letting them reunite with nature, flow in the air. Maybe the wind would take them higher, up to the sun. Maybe then, his sun would feel the words he was too afraid to say. Maybe the sun would soak up all his feelings and shine them down on his best friend.
He was never one for sentiments, never really had anything to feel sentimental about. Until Eijiro took over his whole head. He ruled his emotions, could control his outbursts like the moon can control the ocean's tides. Just like the water’s depth, his emotions were deep, unexplored, unseen by human eyes. His feelings lay bare on the bottom of the deepest trench, buried deep within the sand. Sometimes the current washed the top part away, let his thoughts swim along with animals, undiscovered, yet still there. But the pressure closer to the surface was too much for them, he couldn’t take it. So he chose to explode the words that tried to escape through his pen, before they exploded him. The ashes would end up back in the ocean anyways. They never quite reached the sun before the clouds rained them down again.
Writing became his new normal. It creeped it’s way into his daily routine without a rustle. A month into summer break, and he has been up every morning, watching the sunrise, letting the morning rays envelop him as he wrote his heart out.
The sun was fully up by the time he finished his new entry. His dad came out to sit with him on the engawa, coffee in one hand, newspaper in the other. They sat in silence, neither the talkative type. Katsuki can’t help but think how Eijiro would end up filling the quiet place with soft noise, warm chatter was always his thing anyways.
“You should probably go inside if you don’t want a cold omelette." Masaru spoke, barely audible.
He got up slowly, brushed down his lap, stuffed the small notebook in his back pocket and went inside. The omelette ended up cold and soggy. He still ate it, didn’t even complain about it. It was his fault, he should’ve stopped writing and gone inside the first time they called him in. But he was too immersed in Eijiro, in his feelings. He had to write them down before they consumed him completely. Had to give them a place to thrive, instead of keeping them locked up. After all, nothing could stop Eijiro, not even in Katsuki’s thoughts.
—-
The clock barely read 10 am when his phone rang. He picked it up without a single glance at the ID.
“Hey man! I’m so excited for today, i already packed everything, just wanted to doublecheck something. Oh! Did I wake you up?” Eijiro rumbled on, absolutely no sign of sleep clinging to him.
“No, dumbass, you didn’t.” His words held no bite. “I’m packing right now, what do you want?”
”Switch to facetime?” Katsuki could never resist him when his unsure tone came out. So he hung up and opened facetime app. Shitty hair stared him down. He was the only contact, the only person whose face he wanted to see while talking. He clicked call without hesitation.
Eijiro’s grin lit up the screen. Katsuki had to restrain himself from squinting.
”That’s better. Anyways,” he leaned the phone against something. Katsuki could see his whole room in the frame. His bed was unmade, red checkered sheets bundled up, a big plushie pushed up against his pillows. Its light beige color stained reddish pink from his hair dye. “I don’t know which pants to wear, think i can get away with shorts?” Katsuki stared at him like he grew a second head.
They had planned the hike weeks ago. It was a location Katsuki had always wanted to see, but never got the chance to. He mentioned it to Eijiro offhandedly, but the idiot took it as a challenge and planned the whole hike.
“If you want ticks biting your ass, sure.” Eijiro just rolled his eyes and went to his closet. Just like his bed, his closet was also all over the place. “Did you pack a jacket? Might get cold after dusk.” Eijiro looked over his shoulder before chuckling and grabbed a sweatshirt. It was the one Katsuki usually ended up borrowing whenever they were hanging out. He said he always ran cold, but that was a lie. He felt bad about it, sometimes, but the comfort the hoodie brought him couldn’t compare to anything else. It was worn down, soft, like years of washing scraped away rough layers, but no matter fresh out of the laundry, or dirty after a week's worth of wear, it always, always smelled like Eijiro. The fabric had soaked up his scent, like it wanted to drown in it, and it brought Katsuki down to the deepest depths with it.
“Hurry up, we’re gonna miss the train Ei.” The train ride there was scenematic, or the internet said so. It would suck with all the people around, but maybe he could write in his journal if the redhead fell asleep.
“About that, mom let me borrow her truck, if you’re up for it.” Three hours of uninterrupted ride with only the two of them, Katsuki couldn’t say no.
”You don’t even have a drivers licence, dumbass.” He barked. “Sure, better than riding with some extras on the train.”
“Hell yeah! I’m gonna go shower. Pick you up in a bit?” He asked hopefully.
”Sure, whatever.” He hung up without saying goodbye.
Goodbye’s weren’t their thing anyways. There was never any reason to say it, they were always hanging out, or texting, or calling. Goodnight’s, have fun’s or see you in a bit’s filled their vocabulary. Never quite bidding farewell, always making sure it was known they would be back soon.
Katsuki’s backpack was already packed, filled to the brim with things Eijiro might’ve forgotten. He packed a first aid kit, a water filter just in case, rope, a lighter, a little lighter fluid, trash bags, a hat. He shoved a compass and a map in the side pocket. They loved hiking old school style. GPS hiking wasn’t as exciting for him, and Eijiro was happy to go along with everything Katsuki wanted.
In the end, the backpack ended up being too full to fit a lunch bag in there, but relying on Eijiro to bring lunch was a disaster waiting to happen. His idea of a “good lunch” consisted of a protein bar and chocolate protein smoothie, the meathead.
He still had some time to cook something up really quickly before Eijiro got there. He opted for something filled with carbs and fiber, trusting the redhead to bring enough protein to last them a week. He fried up some vegetables, made rice, put sauces in a small container so the food wouldn’t go soggy on the way there. He fried a small steak, just to please his best friend, also made sure to boil a few eggs. Packed salt and sugar packets, tea bags and snuck out his dad’s collapsable cups. They could boil some water and drink tea if they got there on time.
Eijiro honked outside the window while Katsuki was packing the meal into a bento box. He beckoned him inside. Mitsuki opened the door, greeted him inside in a sweet voice.
It still weirded Katsuki out how much she loved Eijiro, how different she acted around him. They’ve never talked about it, didn’t really do much talking about anything, actually, but he could feel she approved of him. Not that he needed her approval for this, but it was still nice to know she was okay with it.
She could read Katsuki like an open book, it infuriated him to no end. She left him alone for the most part, but sometimes she could act like an annoying hag.
She guided Eijiro to the kitchen, not that he needed it. He’s been to their place countless times. Eijiro’s eyes lit up when he saw Katsuki. He rushed over to his side, practically vibrating with joy.
“Kat, that smells amazing.” His hand shot up to steal a slice of steak, but Katsuki slapped it away before he could grab it.
”Hands to yourself. You trying to go hungry up there?” He yelled.
”No, see, I brought protein bars.” Katsuki’s emotions were all over the place. He wanted to be mad at this dumbass for thinking protein bars were enough to fuel him through a 12 hour hike, but he also wanted to squish his face between his palms and set off explosions, or just kiss him stupid.
“Point still stands. You’re gonna go hungry like that.” Eijiro just pouted in return. Katsuki’s hands almost exploded.
The bento ended up almost overflowing, filled to the brim to feed two boys who eat enough to feed a small family. He closed the lid, put it in a lunch bag on top of all the packets he already put in and zipped it up.
“Here, won’t fit in my bag.” Eijiro grabbed it from him. “Let me grab my bag and we can go.”
When he came back, Eijiro had already put his boots on and was waiting for him by the door. His mom was also there, looking all too pleased with herself. He quickly put his shoes on before she could say anything and pushed his best friend out the door. But nothing could stop Mitsuki Bakugo, not even her son.
“Have fun on your hiking date!”
He could feel his face get hot, heard the blood rushing in his ears. Eijiro looked just as flustered, face as red as his hair. He smiled sheepishly and rubbed his neck.
”WHAT THE FU-“ She slammed the door in his face before he could finish. “Fucking old hag, I swear to fucking god, I will kill her.”
He speedwalked to the truck, boots slamming against the driveway. He pulled on the door handle angrily, only to find it locked. He tugged on it a few times more, just for good measure before glaring at Eijiro. He still looked flustered, before regaining his composure and unlocking the door. Katsuki got in like he wanted the car to swallow him whole, slid down the seat until his ass was barely touching his chair.
Eijiro got in next to him, started up the car and backed out of the driveway.
“Here, man, pick something.” He passed him his phone, spotify already pulled up. The playlist had a simple name, “roadtrip” with a rock and an explosion emoji on either side. He scrolled down the songs, most of them midwest emo, with a few love songs sprinkled in.
“Don’t make me listen to this crap!” He barked out.
“Don’t worry, you’ll like it. I swear, just give it a shot.” He seriously needed to learn how to say no to him.
He pressed shuffle, let the fate choose the best song to torture him with. Eijiro hadn’t lied, it was not that bad. Most of the songs had enough hard beats to restrain him from whining about the ‘softness’ of the lyrics.
“Told you.” He sounded too pleased with himself. To Katsuki, that just meant he was doing something right.
They left the city soon enough. The loud sounds of cars and chatter of people left behind. Eijiro slowed down, the countryside too pretty to just drive past it. He reached behind his seat with one hand, the other still on the wheel. Katsuki was mesmerised. He made it look so effortless.
“Carefull, dumbass, you’re gonna crash the car.“ He was going to crash Katsuki’s heart if he didn’t stop looking so cool doing the smallest things. He pulled out a digital camera and handed it to Katsuki.
“What, you don’t trust my driving?” He mused.
”Not when you drive one fucking handed. What am I supposed to do with this?” He held up the camera.
”Take pictures of the view, obviously. What else?” The problem was that Katsuki was never that good at taking pictures. He wasn’t the artistic type. Sure, he could write, could capture the view with his words, explain it in artistic detail, he could sketch down the words to make the reader see all that he saw. But to take a picture of it? That was his weakness.
“Why can’t you do it?”
“I’m driving, Kat, I can't multitask that much.” He really doesn’t want to do this. He switched the camera on, held it up to his face and cringed. “You can drive if you want, I’ll take the pictures.”
This was starting to feel like a personal attack. He didn’t know how to take good pictures and he sure as hell didn’t know how to fucking drive. “No.”
“Aww, are you scared?” Fuck. Him.
“NO!” Fuck.
“What, Katsuki, can’t you drive?” Jesus fucking christ, someone save him right the fuck now. All these years he’s been constantly under attack by villains and not a single one of them decided to show up when he actually needed it. “Holy shit, you can't drive!” Eijiro exclaimed.
“I can!” There was no use defending himself.
“Oh yeah? Drive then.” And without another word, he turned off the engine and got out of the car. Katsuki was fucked.
Hesitantly, he got out of the passenger seat, passed his traitorous best friend on the way and slid into the driver’s seat. This side of the car felt all wrong, too many buttons, handles and what not.
“Turn over the key.” He could’ve guessed that himself. He faked confidence, but tensed back up when the car whirred to life.
“I know that, dumbass!”
“I know you know, Katsuki. Press on the brake, the left one, yeah right there.” He did as he was told. “No, with your right foot.”
“That makes no fucking sense whatsoever.” Fucking driving and fucking Eijiro teaching him. He pulled up the clutch, he knew that at least.
The redhead chuckled. “Now, put it in drive, the D right there,” Easy enough. “Slowly, put your foot off the brake and put it on the accelerator, don’t press on it.” The car slowly started rolling forward.
The roads were clear, occasional car passed them here and there. It was technically safe for him to drive, it seemed easy enough. Eijiro was here to help if anything happened.
“Slowly press on the accelerator, careful, it’s sensitive. Don’t go too fast yet, ease into it.” He pressed the pedal and the car sped up a bit too fast for his liking. “That’s okay, just take your foot off the pedal and let the speed die down, then put it back on and try again.”
Surprisingly, Katsuki was good at doing what he was told when it came to Eijiro. His instructions were nothing but that, instructions. He wasn’t telling him what to do, or pushing him to do something he didn’t want. He was simply telling him. Not demanding, not asserting dominance, but gently guiding.
“Yeah, there you go. Don’t speed up yet, get used to the feeling. Imagine the car from the outside, envision where the wheels are, try to keep that in mind.” He could do that, nothing about driving seemed hard with Eijiro there. “You’re surprisingly good at this.”
”Surprisingly?! Did you expect me to be anything but the best?!” That was enough of Eijiro being in charge. Katsuki looked to the side and shot his best friend the dirtiest smirk he could manage with his nerves on fire, and he pressed the accelerator.
The car sped up, the wind blew harshly against his face from the open window. He could see Eijiro from the corner of his eye, he was clutching the handle above the door like his life depended on it, the other hand lay close to the clutch in case Katsuki messed up. His face was split in a wild grin, sharp teeth on full display. It took Katsuki’s breath away. He looked so carefree.
“Watch the road, man!” Katsuki looked away, embarrassed to be caught staring, but he couldn’t care less. He slowed the car down, no longer going over the speed limit.
The new pace gave Eijiro a chance to really appreciate the view outside. He held up the camera to his face, quickly snapping a few pictures outside, before turning it to face Katsuki. He liked the attention, liked the way Eijiro always included him in everything, liked how he thought about capturing him too, like he was a beautiful view, good enough to be cherished. So he let him. In his own way at least. Let him snap three pictures exactly, before facing him and flipping his middle finger in front of the lens.
“Stop that, dumbass.” But he couldn’t hide the smugness in his voice.
Eijiro put the camera on his lap, not bothering to turn it off, even though it will lose power faster, if he even remembered to charge it. He will end up complaining about it dying halfway up the mountain. But that’s not Katsuki's problem to care about, right now, he only cares about the direction he’s driving, which he realises he doesn’t know. He trusted Eijiro to take them there. He knew the hiking route by heart, but didn’t even think to check the drive.
“Left or right?” Right.
—-
The rest of the way was peaceful. Katsuki drove the whole time. He got the hang of it pretty quickly. The area was pretty remote, no cities, they drove around the villages, tried to avoid places where they might see people, or too many cars. He parked pretty crooked, but for his first time, it wasn’t so bad. Eijiro didn’t even mention the shit job he did at it. Just smiled at him. Katsuki could see the proud glint in his eyes. He would know that look everywhere, could recognise it in a simple glance. It made his stomach twist in knots and his fingertips buzz. It was a high nothing could ever top.
Eijiro got their backpacks out of the back seat while Katsuki double-checked the map. He had seen this map a million times before, had studied it like the back of his hand. He knew which turn to take where, had done research on which routes had better scenery, made sure to choose the longer route to spend more time there, with him.
“Ready?” The redhead passed him his backpack. His looked obviously heavier than Katsuki’s, he probably ended up packing shit they won’t need. Katsuki was already preparing to see him limping the whole way there instead of admitting the bag was too heavy for him to carry. But that is a future katsuki’s problem, right now, he’s just happy to finally get the chance to hike this mountain with Eijiro by his side.
Hiking has always kept Katsuki’s head calm. The nature sounds, the isolation from the people, the fresh smell, he loved it. He didn’t have to think about anything, just look at the ground, calculate your next step on the uneven soil, check the map, repeat.
He was a strong believer that you don’t really know someone until you’ve walked hours on end with them in silence. This isn’t the first time, nor the last one, but every single time, he’s reminded how much he enjoys Eijiro’s company. It’s not that they don’t communicate, just that they don’t need to. One simple look is enough to get the point across, like ‘look at that bird’, or ‘I saw you trip on that root, dumbass’.
This hike was especially beautiful. Japan’s countryside showed its true colors this time of year, when everything is in bloom, before the sun turns the green grass into a dull orange. He chose the route with a river, there was a small bridge across it, if they found it. It was supposed to be the best view of the whole trail, after the mountain’s apex of course.
The best sight was still Eijiro. Katsuki couldn’t tear his eyes away. He wanted to describe him in his journal, immortalise him between the pages, draw him out in ink that bleeds through the paper, straight into his heart. His notebook is safely tucked away in his backpack pocket, he resists the urge to pull it out.
He opts to memorising him in other ways, he commits to memory the way sun reflects off his hair, how he carries himself through the wind with so much confidence. He faces the currents, enjoys it lapping against his face instead of turning his head away. The resistance never inconveniences him. Maybe that’s why he can see right through Katsuki, how he can always take him head on with that huge grin on his face.
Eijiro has never once made him feel like he was too much, or too little. Ever since the beginning, he has been his rock, and Katsuki has been his. They fit together perfectly. Everyone could see it. It wasn’t a secret that they were made for each other.
Katsuki had amazing analyzing skills. He could see Eijiro loved him, could feel it from a mile away. He has never doubted it, not for a second. He knew Eijiro would never judge him for being in love, he would be so understanding about it, probably handle it better than anyone else. But he would never tell him. Nothing scared Katsuki, but the thought of losing Eijiro left him shaking. So he would keep confessing his love to his journals, so at least the universe would hear him. Maybe then Eijiro would feel it too.
It’s not like he didn’t make it obvious. He couldn’t hide it even if he tried. He showed it through his actions. He took care of Eijiro, made time for him, made sure he never felt like he wasn’t important to him, or wasn’t equal. But his best friend was blessed with a brain so beautiful, but so dense. He never caught on.
Katsuki wanted to show how brilliant he was to everyone, but he couldn’t even tell Eijiro. He was amazing with words, could write a million and one word essay about his feelings for him, yet, never read it to his face. He wasn’t scared of rejection. But the change terrified him. Letting him in would mess up his perfectly crafted solitude. He was happy with yearning in silence, waiting for something that seemed impossible. It gave his days a purpose when nothing else could.
“Ei.” His voice came out softer than intended. He cleared his throat.
”Mhmm.” Eijiro looked behind him, his gaze burned right through Katsuki.
“A break?” He dropped his back in an instant. Hah, knew the fucker couldn’t take the heavy bag.
Katsuki sat down on one of the bigger roots protruding out the ground. Eijiro sat next to him. He reached into his bag and pulled out a protein bar.
“I packed lunch for us, idiot.”
”Yeah, but we can’t eat that fancy hiking food now, man! Just eat the barr.” Katsuki snatched the already bitten bar out of his hand and shoved it in his mouth. “HEY!”
Katsuki grinned, triumphant. Eijiro’s eyes sparkled. Katsuki passed it back to him. He was sure he had brought enough protein bars to feed a whole family, but there was something so mundane about sharing one with him, so familiar.
“Not worried about my spit on it, bro?” Eijiro said around a mouthful.
Katsuki laughed. They’ve shared bottles almost every day during practice, where spit wasn’t the only problem, but the sweat. He never cared about it. “Dumbass.” He said between laughs.
”What? I’m being serious. You threw Denki’s bottle at his head because and I quote,”I’M NOT TOUCHING SOMETHING YOUR DISGUSTING MOUTH HAS EVEN BREATHED ON!” With multiple exclamation points.” See, Katsuki thought, completely oblivious.
“Yeah, and? I’m not going anywhere near his mouth. Fuckin’ disgusting. Eugh.” He faked a shiver.
“Right, but you love my mouth so much.” Eijiro joked like it didn’t steal his breath away to hear those words. They sent a sharp pain through his insides, and nestled deep at the pit of his stomach.
Katsuki looked at him, took in his dishevelled face, his hair askew, mouth smiling crooked, one side raised high, the other downturned. He wanted to kiss it. ”Your’s is not so bad.”
He could see the second his words registered. Eijiro’s breath faltered, his cheeks dusted a shade of pink which could be mistaken for tiredness if his neck wasn’t bright red, if his ears didn’t take that pretty shade of crimson, almost blending in with his hair.
He looked away, “Don’t say stuff like that, man.”
Katsuki knew that look. He’s seen it before, when they got too close while sparring, or when they fell asleep in Eijiro’s dorm and woke up with his best friend’s face shoved against his chest and their legs tangled up together. He saw it that morning too, when his mom joked about the hiking trip being a date.
Eijiro looked back at him, small smile crept up on his face and looked away again. Oh. That. That did katsuki in. He lost his breath. For the first time, he allowed himself to think, maybe Eijiro liked him back.
It was an exhilarating thought. He couldn't wrap his head around it. And suddenly so many things made sense. It explained everything. How Eijiro, the social butterfly, always left the gatherings when Katsuki did, how he never left his side, not for one second. How his jackets always ended up on Eijiro’s shoulders, even when he didn’t lend it to him. How he always sat close to him, shoulders brushing, how he sometimes wrapped his arm around him. Or all the innocent touches that drove Katsuki crazy. How he always breathed in deep when they hugged, or how they always ended up cuddling on his bed while watching a movie.
Fuck.
Katsuki was the oblivious dumbass here.
Not Eijiro.
Maybe he knew. Maybe he could tell. Everyone could. They all tease them, call them lovebirds, they never take a free sit next to them, always assuming the space is reserved for each other. How had he never noticed before. It was always so obvious. He’d seen the winks Mina sent their way when she thought Katsuki wasn’t looking, had heard the wolf whistles from Denki. They all knew, except for him. He was a fucking dumbass.
He has always prided himself for being smart, for noticing everything. Nothing got past him. Not one look, not one word. Yes, he missed all the signs from his best friend. He missed the way he looked at him, the way he always lit up when Katsuki was around. He didn’t analyze how he always prioritised him over everyone and everything else. After all, he did the same. And he had been in love with him for what felt like forever.
Had he wasted all this time for nothing? Could they have fallen in love together, instead of hiding it from each other. They could have called their hang outs dates, could’ve held hands, hugged before parting ways. Katsuki could’ve kissed him before dropping him off. He had the chance to hold him close instead of dreaming about it all this time and he let it go.
He was going to make this right. He would plan everything, take him out to a restaurant, order him a steak so big he had no chance of finishing it and then watch him actually finish it. He would drop him off home, confess his love for him, kiss him on his doorstep and then he would leave. Solid plan.
But first, he had to get through this. His hands shook as he took another bite of a protein bar Eijiro so wholeheartedly provided.
“You good?” Of course he noticed his change in demeanour.
“Yeah, just don’t like stopping for so long.” It wasn’t a lie. Resting always broke his stride.
”Let’s go then!” Eijiro jumped up and pumped his fists together. “To the top we go!”
—-
The rest of the hike went by pretty smoothly. Katsuki didn’t end up accidentally professing his love for him. They took a few breaks. Well, Eijiro took a few breaks. He stopped every few minutes to take pictures. Katsuki didn’t wait for him. If he noticed the flash going off in his direction, he didn’t stop to ask about it.
The camping site was beautiful. The mountain was the tallest one in the bunch. It overlooked everything. The clouds looked like fluffy carpets they could jump on. Katsuki wanted to try. He probably could take Eijiro with him, then fly back up to the top.
Saying it out loud would’ve been stupid though.
Eijiro gathered some firewood while Katsuki overlooked the earth. This high up he could see it curve slightly in the distance. There were eagles flying, cawing at their heads. The sun was close to setting now. The rays had turned a pretty shade of pink.
“Oi, dumbass!” Eijiro yelled back something he couldn’t make out. “Get your photographer ass over here.”
“OH! That’s beautiful. Do not move for a sec.” He heard a few clicks of the camera snapping pictures. He was standing sideways, his profile outlined by the sun. His hair looked a cooler shade of pink with little less yellows than normal.
“Come light the fire, this stupid match isn’t working.”
“Did you use the lighter fluid?” Eijiro’s face turned pink. “Fuckin’ hair for brains.” He exploded one of the larger logs. It instantly caught fire.
“I’m gonna heat up the food.” Katsuki threw the heatsafe container straight into the fire. Eijiro cringed watching him.
They sat down on a fallen tree, close together. Katsuki couldn’t help but lean into his side. Eijiro took out his camera and browsed through the pictures. Most of them had katsuki in it.
“You’re obsessed, stupid.”
“You’re beautiful, Kat.” His eyes landed on a picture he had just taken. Katsuki on top of a mountain, looking down at the world. His hair was lit up by the sun, his shoulders were loose, face calm. He had never seen himself like this before.
“Don’t say stupid shit you don’t mean.” Please, I can’t take it. he didn’t add.
“I do mean it though. You are beautiful Katsuki.”
Katsuki looked up at him. He looked breathtaking. The sun kissed face, his freckles had come out from hiding, the apples of his cheeks red, sunburnt, skin taught and dryer than normal. He wanted to kiss them. Wanted to kiss him. Anywhere. His cheeks, his nose, his scars, his lips. He wanted to map his face with his lips. Wanted to memorise every corner.
He wanted.
Now, looking at him, really looking at him, he saw what he was supposed to see long ago. His best friend. His rock. His everything. And as Eijiro gazed back at him, he saw his emotions mirrored in his eyes, he saw all the waiting, all the wanting. He saw the love in his eyes, saw his lips twitch into a nervous smile, filled with so much emotion, so much warmth.
How stupid had they been?
Eijiro was the one for him. It was glaringly obvious. And he was the one for Eijiro, no matter how much he ignored it. It was always bound to happen.
They were written in the stars, in the way they reflected off the ocean, in the way the sun sat down the sea and bathed everything in hues of red and orange. They were always meant to be.
There was no use fighting it. His eyes drifted to his lips, to his eyes, his eyebrows. He couldn’t tear them away. He studied his face like it was a work of art. And it was. He was sure Aphrodite herself took her sweet time crafting him, colored his face with watercolors, took particles of the sun and placed them in his eyes so they would always shine brighter than anything else. She made him beautifully rugged, yet so soft. All the rough edges that could cut, teeth that could tear flesh and grind down bone, and the heart that could shame flowers with its sweet nectar.
Their eyes met and the world stopped. His breath hitched. If he could tear his eyes away from the sparks in Eijiro’s eyes, he would’ve seen his chest stutter too, seen his hand move slowly, reluctantly pull back and towards him again. He felt him grab his arm, grip strong, fingers digging into the muscle like he was afraid of letting go. Like he was trying to make sure this was real.
Their gazes never left each other. Unspoken words floated around them. Too afraid to move, to break the spell cast on them by the universe itself. Crimson on ruby, fire on sunshine, their faces drew closer. He could feel Eijiro’s breath on his face, could taste the desperation in the air, the hunger, the worry, the excitement.
Eijiro’s eyes held his like a lifeline, like he was too afraid to look down, like looking at his lips would make him fall off a tightrope he was walking on. Like maybe, if he looked, then this would become too real, too raw. Maybe it would scare them away. But Katsuki was determined. He wanted this, and knowing his best friend wanted it back, wanted him back, was enough to make him take the final step.
He wiped his hands on his thighs, let out small crackles to get rid of the excess nitroglycerin before bringing it up to Eijiro’s face. The sound of explosions made the redhead smile, something so sweet it made Katsuki’s throat burn. He held his face, thumbed over his cheek, his pinky rested comfortably between his neck and his jaw. The touch anchored them both to the moment. There was no going back from this.
Eijiro inched closer, a small step to get them chest to chest. A breath separated their faces, their noses brushed, Eijiro’s eyes fluttered closed. Katsuki watched. He was so beautiful. What was previously a soft blush was now covering his whole face, his nose so ridiculously red, sunkissed skin flushed a deep shade of red. Katsuki wanted to treasure it forever.
Eijiro pulled him in like a siren. His call too strong for him to resist, his song too hypnotising. Their lips met in a soft kiss. A touch so delicate, like angels were blessing them with their love. He could hear sparks around them, maybe it was his palms, maybe it was the universe exploding with their love. Maybe it was the sun throwing solar flares at them, finally seeing their love up close instead of reading the ashes Katsuki sent its way. Or maybe it was the ocean waves crushing against cliffs, exploding in small, foamy particles as their story was finally rewritten in present tense.
Eijiro’s lips felt like heaven. So soft, so plush. His hand stroked his cheek once more, grounding himself, making sure this was real. The redhead's hand moved from his arm to his face, the other held his waist, moved him closer. Face to face, chest to chest, heart to heart. Their lips fit together like they were made for each other.
They broke apart slowly, lips separated delicately like no other. Eijiro breathed against his face, Katsuki forgot how to. Then Eijiro smiled. His heart stopped functioning. His whole body followed. He breathed out a little laugh, something more like a wheeze. Eijiro pressed their foreheads together.
”You just have to one up me with everything, huh? I had this whole thing planned. Took you on a hike you dreamed about, was gonna do the whole speech, had it written down and everything just in case.” Katsuki could not believe his ears. This idiot. “I’m still gonna do it tho, gimme a sec to breathe ‘cause I think my lungs stopped working for a sec.”
Katsuki laughed. A full body, shuddering laugh. He almost doubled over in fact, would have if Eijiro wasn’t standing so close to him. Instead he leaned his full body weight on him, shoved his face in his shoulder and muffled his chuckles.
“You are an idiot. A complete moron. I can not believe I fell for you.” He was babbling, half the sentences muffled by Eijiro’s shirt. “So dumb. So so so fucking dumb.” He faced him with the meanest scowl he could manage, which was barely a scowl at all. “Kiss me again.”
And he did. They kissed as the sun sat, bathing them in glows of reds and oranges and yellows. Katsuki took a mental note to write it down as soon as he got home.
“Katsuki.” A kiss. “Katsuki.” Another kiss. “Kat, wait.” He didn’t want to, so he pressed yet another kiss to his mouth. “Kat, I’m serious. Have to,” Kiss. “confess,” Kiss. “my love for you.”
my love for you .
He loves Katsuki.
He loves Katsuki.
Katsuki stopped dead in his tracks. He pulled away slowly. His heart was beating too fast, he could feel his pulls in his fingertips, heard his blood wooshing in his ears. “You,” He couldn’t bring himself to say it.
“I love you.” Eijiro helped. Like it was doing that. If anything, it only made Katsuki panic more. Sure, he had realised he liked him back, maybe wanted a relationship with him, but to love him? It seemed out of this world. He’d thought about it before, never had the courage to fully dream about it though.
“I love you, Kat.”
How could he love him, someone so explosive, so irrational, so rash. He wasn’t what he deserved. Eijiro needed someone who could love him in his own way. Someone soft and delicate and not afraid to say it back even though he had loved him even before he met him.
“I love you, Katsuki.” And when he said his name, he said it like it didn’t scare him, like it was something to hold sacred, close to his heart. He pronounced every syllable, didn’t miss a single intonation. He said it like it held the whole meaning of his world. Like it was heavy with katsuki, but so light, the same way you feel when you're floating in the ocean. He poured his heart into it, and when he said it again, “Katsuki”, he knew he meant it.
“Eijiro.” Katsuki shivered. And the redhead, the chivalrous dumbass, pulled him against his chest, held the back of his head and pushed it against the junction between his neck and his shoulder. He held him there, stroked his fingers through his hair. Katsuki couldn’t breathe.
”I’ve been in love with you since the day we met. I looked at you and thought, who is this loud demon and how do I make him mine?” He chuckled like he had just told the funniest joke ever. Katsuki grabbed the sides of his shirt. “And then you came along with your unapologetic words and your explosions and that manly look you get in your eyes when you accomplish something you worked so hard for. I didn’t stand a chance. After a while, you got the same look in your eyes when you looked at me. I knew then that I loved you. When you looked at me so proudly, so full of something I didn’t know how to name yet, something that sent shivers down my spine and my heart into overdrive. And that day you got kidnapped, I knew I had to make you mine. But when the war started, we barely saw each other. I was a wreck, man. But it helped me realise we don’t have the time to waste.“ Katsuki could barely breathe. “I love you, Katsuki, and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you. You’re it for me, man. I don’t want to go another day without knowing you’re waiting for me at the end.”
He peeled Katsuki away. His eyes were bloodshot, like he had been holding back tears. His mouth opened, then closed.
”I thought,” he hesitated, then started over again. “You love me?” His voice was soft, it still held a little edge to it, so uncharacteristic for him it made his blood curl. He cleared his throat.
“You helped me.” He started, not letting Eijiro answer his question. “During the war, I was, fuck, I was about to give up. My life flashed before my eyes, as cheesy as it sounds. All I saw was you. You helped me stay alive and fight, Eijiro. You’re my rock, Ei, my unbreakable horse, remember?” Eijiro giggled. “I swore off love, I thought it would’ve made me weak. But you make me feel like the strongest motherfucker out there.” He held his face between his hands. “I love you. More than I can express through words and I will spend the rest of my life proving it to you over and over again.”
Tears welled up in Eijiro’s eyes. Katsuki had half the mind to kiss them away, instead, he watched as they fell down the apples of his cheeks and into his palms as he held his face steady.
“I love you, Katsuki.” He repeated. “I don’t want to ever stop saying that.” And Katsuki didn’t want to stop hearing it.
The sun set behind the mountains below them as they ate their meal. Soft words exchanged between stuffed mouths, bodies pressed up against each other as they sat next to the campfire.
Katsuki set up the tent, thankful for the distraction to get his mind to calm down a little. His hands still set off little sparkles. He could see Eijiro’s smile get a little brighter at each one of them.
They climbed into their sleeping bags as the smoke rose from the doused log fire, moonlight eliminating it in a soft silver glow. Crickets around them sang a song only for them to hear, fireflies danced around the tent, bathing them in a halo of gold. Logs creaked as they cooled down. Two owls sat close together on a tall spruce tree. Two young lovers held hands as they faced each other on the harsh camping ground, heads propped up on their arms. Neither spoke, they didn’t need to. Nature was filling their silence with words only they felt.
And as their eyes fluttered closed, they knew. This wasn’t just a teenage crush, this was real. This was something poets have tried to describe over and over, have come up with metaphors no one but the two of them could understand. This was something artists have tried to show from the dawn of time through their creations, how they sculpted their lovers, kept them everlasting, how they painted them, tried to show the world their lovers through their eyes. They kept their feelings a memory never to be forgotten, kept alive for thousands of years.
Katsuki knew he had found it in those red eyes, that unbreakable skin, a smile so full of life, full of love. That night, as he watched his lover's chest rise and fall with the rhythm set by the gods themselves, he made a promise to himself and to the universe. He would never take this for granted. He would cherish it forever, hold it close to his heart and never, ever let go.
It all started in the summer, centuries ago, when the sun melted the ice for the very first time. When the sun and the ocean sat down to write their love story, forever to be repeated. But this time, Icarus reached the sun, this time, Achilles and Patroclus didn’t have to wait for the gods of death, this time, Eijiro and Katsuki intertwined their lifelines together, never to be separated.