Archive of Our Own

Monica fidgeted with her fingers, glancing around the main courtyard of the academy. For once, she wasn’t dressed in her school uniform, but her navy dress and white coat Louis had given her. Even though she had worn it before, and Nero had reassured her she looked good, she couldn’t stop feeling uncomfortable.

… No, maybe it was less the clothes and more of where she was. Thankfully, as it was evening and the weekend, not many students lingered outside. She wasn’t used to waiting in the main courtyard, and normally, she wouldn’t if she had a choice.

Not that she had a choice.

Felix had asked her to wait for him, and she couldn’t say no even if she wanted to, as she found herself wanting to be around him more and more recently. He hadn’t told her much else other than hinting how he wanted to spend time with her outside the academy, causing her heart to skip a beat.

It reminded her of their night in Corlapton. Sure, they hadn’t met up on purpose, but she knew they both had fond memories of that night. Just knowing she’d get to spend time with him made her heart flutter. Plus, it was good for her mission for her to stay with him, even if she knew she… wasn’t thinking about the mission so much as hanging out with him.

A carriage pulling up beside her brought her back to reality, and any fear Monica felt disappeared at Felix opening the door. He wore a white long sleeve button up shirt under a nice black coat and nice black slacks. It didn’t look much different from his school uniform, yet Monica found herself staring, her heartbeat quickening, although whether it was at his looks or that familiar soft, genuine smile, she didn’t know.

Felix stepped down, his smile turning slightly apologetic. “Sorry I’m late, Monica. Did you wait long?” She immediately shook her head furiously. His smile returned to the soft smile, and his eyes lit up at noticing her necklace. “Then should we get going?” Before she could reply, he reached out and grabbed the necklace, bringing it closer to him before kissing it, keeping his eyes on her.

Monica flushed, staring at him with wide eyes before looking away from him. “Um… We, er… W-Where are we…?” She fidgeted with her fingers again.

Felix reached out, grabbing one of her hands and holding it, grinning and looking pleased when Monica looked back at him. “You’ll see.” He winked at her. “I promise you won’t be disappointed.”

Now she found herself even more curious. Where exactly did he plan to take her?

He allowed her to board the carriage first, his eyes softening when he stepped in to find Monica still standing and looking around with a troubled expression. Grabbing her hand again, he gestured for her to sit before sitting down next to her, Monica’s heart skipping a beat at how he kept holding her hand.

They set off shortly after, and even though she’d rode in a carriage before, Monica found she couldn’t sit still. She kept fidgeting with her free hand, and her feet kept twitching, even though she couldn’t go anywhere and didn’t want to leave.

No, this wasn’t out of fear. These were purely out of nerves, seeing as she sat in a carriage with Felix, of all people.

“Relax.”

Monica jumped at the gentle squeeze to her hand, turning to him.

Felix smiled his soft, genuine smile at her. “It won’t take long. I’ll be here with you the whole time.”

That’s the problem! This isn’t normal! What should I do, what should I do, what should I do?

Monica quickly turned away from him, her heartbeat racing. She… didn’t know what to say. What was she supposed to say to that?

“Or maybe…”

Monica let out a strange yelp at Felix whispering into her ear. She pulled away from him, holding her ear with her free hand and giving him a wide-eyed look.

Felix smiled an amused smile, something flashing in his eyes. If she didn’t know any better, she might’ve thought he looked smug. “Maybe that’s the problem?” His eyes gleamed mischievously, and his smile turned teasing. “You want to be alone with me.”

Yes, but not for the reason you think!

It was strange. Before, she might’ve paled at the thought of being alone with Felix. She might’ve tried to stay as far away from him as possible. Now, all she wanted was to be alone with him. She found herself feeling comfortable and safe around him.

He was her friend, and that was why she wanted to hurry up and be alone with him.

She didn’t know why, but ever since she had met up with him earlier, she had found herself with the urge to call him by his name – well, his nickname. She couldn’t do that with other people around, and she felt too self-conscious with the coachman around to even try and call him that.

“Don’t worry,” Felix whispered into her ear, and her breathing hitched despite herself. “We’ll be alone soon enough.” His eyes were soft, and he smiled that soft, genuine smile. “Just wait a little bit longer.”

Did he… just read her thoughts? Or maybe he wanted to be alone with her just as much as she did?

She felt her face warm up and quickly turned away from him, slowly nodding. “Y-Yes, I’ll do my best.”

What was wrong with her? Ever since she talked to Nero about love, she couldn’t get Ike out of her head. Couldn’t get the thought of… loving him out of her head.

Even though Nero had taken the time and was nice enough to explain it in a way even she’d understand, she still found the whole thing a little impossible.

Her falling in love? With Ike?

Was that even possible?

They stopped sometime later, and Felix got out first, holding out a hand for her. Any hesitation, any fear, any remaining nerves, disappeared at those soft eyes. Feeling a little shy, she glanced away from him, putting her hand in his and allowing him to help her out of the carriage.

Felix gently squeezed her hand before tugging her with him, and Monica, who had been expecting him to talk to the coachman, was taken off guard, missed a step, and promptly stumbled. With reflexes she didn’t even know he had, he immediately turned around and wrapped his arms around her, Monica’s heartbeat racing at the proximity and at… his arms around her. He tightened his grip, keeping her close. “Careful there,” he murmured. “I’ve got you. Are you alright?” She nodded, unsure whether she wanted him to let go. Her thoughts must’ve shown on her face as something flashed in his eyes before he let go, looking almost reluctant.

Somehow, she… didn’t like that expression. Maybe because she knew it was her fault?

Monica, who had been hunching over, glanced down at her necklace before straightening her back and reaching out with a shaking right hand, touching Felix’s left hand, causing him to give her a wide-eyed look. He smiled that soft, genuine smile before holding her hand once more.

“Hold on tight. I don’t want you to get lost.” He smiled a teasing smile, poking the peridot with his free hand, his eyes gleaming mischievously. “Even if I’m confident I can find you wherever you are.”

… That was right. He had said something like that before, hadn’t he? Something about finding her wherever she was as long as she wore the necklace? Before, the thought of him finding her might’ve made her pale or even afraid. Now, it made her feel safe.

She liked the idea of Ike finding her.

Maybe… Maybe because she knew he genuinely cared about her? Maybe because of these feelings for him?

Monica hesitated before moving closer, tightening her grip on his hand. “I-I’ll do my best.” Come to think of it… He had said something about not wanting her to get lost, right? Where were they? She looked away from him, her eyes widening.

She… recognized this town. In fact, she had visited it not too long ago to learn why Duke Crockford killed her father.

This… was Corlapton.

She turned to Felix, who grinned at her.

“Surprised? There’s not a festival going on, so I thought you might enjoy getting to walk on the streets without all the people around.” He started walking, matching his stride with hers. He smiled his soft, genuine smile. “Hanging out together at the academy makes you nervous, right? Because of all the attention?”

… Wait. That was why he had brought her here?

This was… all for her?

Monica felt her cheeks warm up, her heart somehow fluttering and squeezing tightly at the same time. Even though it was chilly outside, she felt warm all over. Her mouth opened then closed. She… needed to do this. Her mouth opened, a weird squeak escaping. She glanced down at her necklace before looking at him, finding it hard to look away from those soft eyes. She tried once more. “Ike…”

“Hm?”

Monica weakly squeezed his hand, her free hand reaching up to her necklace and holding on to it. “Thank you.” Her voice shook, but she spoke clearly.

He kept those soft, almost tender eyes on her, happiness and… something else in his eyes. “It’s my pleasure.”

They walked down the main street, Felix pointing out places to her in a low voice. It wasn’t the first time she had thought it, but how many times had he come here? Despite being a prince, he walked with a confident and relaxed gait and knew almost all the shops and restaurants.

… No, he wasn’t a prince right now, was he? This… was Ike.

At Felix’s suggestion, they stopped by a local restaurant, two waiters dressed in a uniform bowing to them when they entered.

“Welcome to our restaurant.” One of the waiters approached them, holding out a hand to Monica. “May I take your coat?”

Monica jumped, moving closer to Felix and avoiding his eyes. What… was she supposed to say? Why did they want her coat?

Felix chuckled, gently squeezing her hand to get her attention. “I’m sorry, Monica. This is one of the nicer restaurants, so it’s to be expected.” To be expected? Monica wouldn’t know anything about that sort of thing. Felix let go of her hand and nudged her before taking off his own coat. “Go on. He’s only being polite.”

She hesitated before taking off her coat and handing it over to the waiter.

“Thank you, sir and ma’am. I’ll bring them to you when you’re ready to leave.” The waiter bowed before leaving them.

The other waiter led them to their table, Felix gently reaching for her hand once more.

“I’m sorry for surprising you,” he murmured, smiling an apologetic smile, his eyes soft. “I thought about bringing you to a cheaper restaurant, but I didn’t think you’d enjoy it with all the people around.”

This restaurant reminded Monica of the academy cafeteria with its high ceiling and beautiful table settings. Crisp white tablecloths, fresh flowers, and shiny tableware adorned all the tables, although one difference was the noise level. While the cafeteria got loud at times, the atmosphere here felt quiet and serene. People dressed nicely held comfortable conversations in low voices. The notes of a piano flowed like a gentle stream throughout the whole restaurant.

He… was right. She wouldn’t enjoy a crowded restaurant and might not have felt comfortable, even with Felix right beside her. Her heart fluttered at his thoughtfulness, and she nodded, shyly avoiding his eyes.

“T-Thank you,” she murmured.

They sat down at their table, and instead of relaxing in her seat, Monica stiffened, keeping her knees together to stop herself from trembling. The way things were going… He probably wanted to talk to her, right?

W-W-What should I do? I’m bad at making conversation. What if I make things awkward? What should I talk about?

Felix reached out, poking the peridot and causing her to look up, her breath catching at those soft eyes. “It’ll be alright,” he reassured with a soft smile. “I’m here with you.” She stared at him with wide eyes, surprised that after all this time, he knew her that well. He picked up the menu. “Are you hungry?” He pointed at a fish dish on one of the pages. “If you like fish, I’d recommend getting this one. It comes with a salad, too.”

Monica breathed a sigh of relief, her body relaxing. “T-Then, um, I’ll take that.” It was nice to have a recommendation, as she didn’t think she’d be able to choose otherwise. She blinked, a thought coming to her.

Did… she ever tell him she liked fish dishes? Maybe it was a coincidence?

They ordered their food, and Felix turned to her once the waiter left.

“Come to think of it… How’s your investigation going?”

Monica froze, her heart pounding. “W-What?” When he didn’t answer and continued staring at her with dark blue eyes, she swallowed painfully. “I-Investigation?”

He… couldn’t be asking about how she and Bridget infiltrated Duke Crockford’s manor, right? Did Duke Crockford tell him something? Or did Felix somehow realize she had been snooping around in his past?

Felix tilted his head, studying her, Monica resisting the urge to squirm. “You’ve been investigating the intruder from the chess tournament, right?” She inwardly breathed a sigh of relief, relaxing. Of course. Why didn’t she realize it sooner? Recently, they visited the academy library and spent time together reading. While there, Monica had given him the excuse of wanting to investigate the intruder from the chess tournament, Yuan, and body manipulation magic. “Have you learned anything?”

Remembering what happened the last time she had met Yuan and how he’d impersonated Ike, Monica clenched her fists under the table, her eyes darkening. She didn’t normally attack people without warning, yet when she saw him impersonating Ike, she had felt this overwhelming urge to attack him. What gave him the right to impersonate Ike, of all people? She still remembered that uncharacteristic fury and how she had to rein it back. How she had reminded herself to focus on her mission and focus on the information.

“Monica?”

She gasped, her heart clenching at Felix’s confused and almost concerned look. “I-I’m sorry. I, um, well…” What… was she doing? He had gone to the trouble of inviting her out, and she was messing things up.

Felix slightly narrowed his eyes, studying her, Monica sweating all over at the suspicion in his eyes. “Did something happen?” Of course. Of course he’d suspect something if he saw her react like that. What was she thinking? “Have you learned anything?”

What… was she supposed to say? She couldn’t exactly lie to him, yet she couldn’t tell him the truth either. She racked her brain furiously for an explanation, some kind of excuse. “I want to learn more about you.”

Felix’s eyes widened, and she paled, her eyes wide.

Not that. Anything but that. What… had she just done?

“What did you just say?” Felix’s voice was soft.

Monica quickly turned away from him, fidgeting with her fingers. “Um, well… I can’t explain it well, but you… know a lot about me. I want to learn more about you.” She glanced down at her necklace, taking a deep breath before turning to him. “Is that okay?”

It wasn’t a lie per se, as she wanted to learn more about him, and she had talked to Yuan about Felix’s past.

Felix gave her a wide-eyed look before flushing, causing her to stare. She hadn’t seen him like this in a long time. He chuckled, bringing a hand up his forehead and shielding his eyes, hiding them from view. “Forgive me. You just surprised me, that’s all.” He took a deep breath before allowing his hand to drop, Monica’s heart stuttering at the pure happiness in his eyes. “I’m happy you want to learn more about me. Truly.” He reached out, gently setting his hand on top of hers, Monica flinching despite herself. “If you’ll permit me to, I would like to learn more about you, too.” His eyes softened. “A lot more. I want to be the person who knows you best.”

Me too.

Monica physically bit her tongue to keep herself from voicing her thoughts. Where… did that thought even come from? They… were friends and had this complicated relationship, and sure, she didn’t want to live without him.

Wanting to be the person who knew him best? Was that something a friend would say?

She took a deep breath before nodding and hesitantly turning her hand so that she held his hand. “I-I’d love that, Ike.”

Felix beamed at her, and even though her cheeks felt warm, she found she couldn’t look away from him. This wasn’t Felix, the perfect prince. This was Ike, the young man.

Ike, the young man she… might be falling in love with.

ZZZ

After leaving the restaurant, Felix took her to the center of the city, where some traveling musicians performed music. Instead of getting closer, he stopped a good distance away from the crowd and turned to her, his eyes gleaming mischievously. He let go of her hand before stepping away from her and holding out a hand.

“May I have this dance, my lady?”

Monica paled before waving her hands furiously in front of her. “I… But I-I’ll just step on your toes! Why here?”

Felix gestured around them, where some couples started dancing to the now soft music. She didn’t know the names of those dances, but it didn’t look like any sort of ballroom dancing. “Those traveling musicians have been playing here every night recently, and when they do, you can always see people dancing.” How… How often did he come to Corlapton by himself? Her stomach hurt at the thought, and she held it, wincing. “Plus…” His eyes darkened, sadness appearing in his eyes. “You wouldn’t dance with me back at the academy.” Even his voice sounded unhappy.

“Urk.” Monica hung her head, ashamed. It was the truth after all.

“That’s why…” A gloved hand appeared in her vision, causing her to look at him. “Would you like to dance?”

Monica hesitated before reaching out with a shaking hand. “B-But…”

Felix watched her with soft eyes, not moving even when her hand touched his. “Of course, I won’t force you to dance if you don’t want to. I just thought you might enjoy it.”

Monica avoided his eyes, the guilt returning. She should’ve known he had asked because he wanted to make her happy. That was… what tonight was about to him, wasn’t it? Even if she didn’t quite understand it, she knew she… didn’t want to make him sad anymore. Plus, she… She glanced at her necklace before straightening her back and making eye contact, holding on to his hand with a firm grip now, causing his eyes to widen. “Ike… I want to dance. With you,” she murmured shyly, her free hand fidgeting with the peridot. “Is that okay?”

“Come here,” he murmured, and this time, she stepped closer to him. He immediately gripped her hand, pulling her closer, his hand moving to support her body. Monica tensed up at the touch before forcing herself to relax. This… was Ike. He wouldn’t hurt her. Plus, she… Still holding her hand and keeping her close, he moved his feet, Monica instinctively knowing when to start.

Feeling a little self-conscious of those soft eyes on hers and knowing they were probably one of the only ones ballroom dancing, she avoided his eyes, keeping her gaze on their feet.

They danced in silence for a while, and Monica slowly relaxed, starting to enjoy it. The soft notes of the violin and flute… Dancing away from the crowd… Getting to dance with Ike again…

She smiled, her eyes soft.

Yes, this… was what she wanted. She had wanted to dance with him again.

“What do you think?” His voice was low.

She looked up, making eye contact, Felix’s eyes widening at her smile. “It’s fun, Ike.” She hesitated before forcing herself to continue. “I’m glad.”

“Hm?”

“I’m glad I get to dance with you again.”

Felix’s eyes softened. He briefly tightened his grip around her. “I feel the same. I’m glad.” He smiled his soft, genuine smile, causing Monica’s heart to flutter. “Really glad you’re having fun.” He lowered his voice, something flashing in his eyes. “That’s what tonight is all about.”

… So she had been right. Everything he had done so far was all for her. He… wanted to see her smile. See her having fun.

Then…

What about him? Was he having fun? She didn’t doubt he did all this willingly and felt happy to see her happy, yet it… didn’t feel enough. She wanted him to have fun, too.

Last time they had been to Corlapton, Ike had genuinely enjoyed himself. He looked happy. Happy in a way he never looked back at the academy, and she knew now it had been because he had been Ike, the young man, and not Felix, the perfect prince.

They finished dancing, and Felix reluctantly let go of her, lighting up when she tentatively reached out and held his hand again.

“It’s getting pretty late,” he murmured, stroking her hand with his thumb. “We probably have enough time to visit one more place.”

Struck with the urge to make him happy, see his happy face, Monica found herself moving closer, reaching out with her shaking free hand and grabbing the front of his coat, causing his eyes to widen. “You pick the place, Ike.”

“Haven’t I been choosing all the places anyway?” Amusement flashed in his eyes.

She shook her head. “No, I want you to choose the last place. I-I want to go where you want to go.”

Felix didn’t say anything, glancing down at the hand resting on his chest, something unrecognizable flashing in his eyes. Before she could apologize and move away, he reached up with his free hand, setting his hand on top of hers. “Are you sure?” She nodded. His eyes lit up. “In that case, I know where we should go.”

Looking back, Monica didn’t know why she had desperately wanted to make him happy. Only that it felt right. Looking back, she didn’t know why she had overlooked something obvious. Something she should’ve known would happen.

A few minutes later, they arrived at a familiar shop, Monica paling at the sight of it.

Of course. Of course he’d pick this place. She should’ve known. Why? Why hadn’t she thought about that possibility?

This… was his favorite shop in Corlapton after all.

Felix beamed at her, his blue eyes lit up with joy. It reminded Monica of something. Back when she lived in her mountain hut with Nero, she had always used the water from her well. On the rare occasions where Nero would force her outside, she’d walk to the closest stream. The water had been a light blue color, and when the sun shined onto it, it sparkled. Even though Monica hadn’t been interested in the scenery or pretty things back then, she had remembered thinking it looked beautiful. Felix’s joyful light blue eyes reminded her of that gentle and beautiful stream.

She quickly looked away from him, her cheeks warming up. Seriously, what was wrong with her?

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Felix gently squeezed her hand, causing her to turn to him. Fondness appeared in his eyes. “The last time you came here was the night of the festival.”

Actually, that’s not true. I was here not too long ago, but I can’t tell you that. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!

Monica trembled next to him, her heart pounding. This… was bad. Very bad.

“Let’s hurry up and go in.” Felix, it seemed, was either oblivious to her reaction or didn’t think much of it, and she didn’t know why she felt this relieved, as she knew.

Knew that one day, one day soon, she’d… need to tell him about her father and what happened to him.

As someone who had taken the real Felix’s spot and someone who’d one day become king, she wanted him to know. She… wanted him to remember her father.

They made their way through the shop, Monica smelling that familiar scent of old books and bug-repelling herbs. When they came to the small counter where Porter worked, Porter didn’t look up at them.

“Good evening, Porter.”

Porter didn’t look up from his manuscript, although he paused when Felix spoke to him. “… Hello. Back again so soon?”

At first, Monica believed he had been addressing Felix, so she didn’t answer. When he stopped writing and made eye contact with her, not Felix, Monica paled, her heart pounding. He wouldn’t… tell Felix, would he? “G-Good evening,” she greeted weakly.

“You remember Porter, don’t you, Monica?” Felix turned to her before furrowing his brow. Monica belatedly realized she had allowed the troubled expression to remain on her face. “Monica?” He slightly narrowed his eyes, studying her.

Eep! He’s getting suspicious! W-What should I do, what should I do, what should I do?

Monica couldn’t stop trembling. “I-I’m sorry. I… Y-Yes, I remember.” She needed an excuse. Anything. She latched on to the first one that popped into her head. “J-Just cold!”

That… was the wrong thing to say.

Porter glared at Monica, and she shrank back, remembering the last time she had been here, and he had glared at her the same way. “This shop isn’t that old.”

“Aah, I-I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

Felix immediately let go of her hand, taking off his coat and putting it on her, his eyes soft and concerned. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were that cold.”

She hesitantly clutched Felix’s coat, shaking her head. “D-Don’t be.” She couldn’t exactly return it after claiming she was cold, yet she felt uncomfortable, even with the residual warmth coming from it. She gave him a rare, stubborn look. “I-I wanted to come here.” Well, not here exactly, but she had wanted to make Felix happy.

Felix stared at her for a few moments before chuckling, amusement and relief appearing in his eyes. “Then I’m glad. If you’re sure you’re alright.” She nodded furiously, Felix smiling his soft, genuine smile before turning to Porter. “I promise we won’t be long, Porter. You mentioned the last time I came that you might be getting some new stock in, so I came to check.”

Porter made eye contact with Felix, and Monica could’ve sworn he had slightly narrowed his eyes. He gestured to the bookshelf near the wall with his pen. “Indeed. I found some books you’d probably enjoy.”

Felix lit up and plucked something from the shelf. “Oh! More old copies of Minerva Springs! I wonder if the Silent Witch wrote any of the essays in here!”

Monica squeaked, her cheeks flushing. She thought she had gotten used to seeing him react like this, yet she still felt embarrassed and… a little happy. Felix flipped through the pages, his eyes lit up with happiness and excitement, and something inside her… relaxed. She found herself smiling, her eyes soft and warm.

This. This was what she wanted to see.

Coming here was more than worth it if she got to see him like this.

“I’ve got some books you might like, too,” Porter addressed Monica, causing her to jump and turn to him. He gestured behind him to the small living space in the back of the shop. “Some rare mathematics books. I haven’t gotten around to putting them on the shelves yet, but you’re welcome to come back here and look.”

Monica almost gulped at those dark, expecting eyes. He… wanted to talk to her? Now? With Felix in the shop? She let out a shaky breath, briefly tightening her grip on Felix’s coat. “T-Then, um, I’ll take a look.”

She made her way to the back of the shop, her heartbeat racing. She tripped over a cardboard box, letting out a strange yelp and falling to her knees. To her surprise, mathematics books lay inside the box. Porter had been telling the truth after all. Maybe he didn’t do this just because he wanted to talk to her?

“Sorry about that.” Monica jumped at Porter’s voice, and she quickly turned. He had come up behind her, those dark eyes roaming over the dark room. “I really should tidy up back here.” Cardboard boxes lay everywhere, and books and papers took up almost all the remaining space. In the back of the room stood a tall and imposing bookshelf filled with books.

Monica clutched Felix’s coat, not wanting it to fall and get dirty before slowly getting up and shaking her head. “Don’t worry. I’m used to it.” The mountain hut she used to live in had looked like this, and her foster mother’s place was just as bad, if not worse. “What did you want to talk about?”

“Straight to the point, are you?”

Monica tilted her head in the direction of the shop, where they heard Felix flipping pages. “I’d rather not keep him waiting."

Porter regarded her with a frown. “Then I’ll get straight to the point.” Something flashed in those dark eyes. “Why are you back here with him?”

She knew what he meant. What he was really asking.

She tightened her grip on Felix’s coat. “He hasn’t done anything wrong, and I refuse to treat him differently just because he’s associated with the person who killed my father.” She still didn’t know if Ike had been involved in her father’s death. She… didn’t want him to be, even hoped he hadn’t been.

“Does he know about your identity?” Monica nodded. Porter shook his head, waving a hand. “No, I mean your true identity.”

Monica tensed up despite herself. Earlier, she had told Ike she wanted to learn more about him, and Ike told her the same. Naturally, that’d mean the subject of her father would eventually come up, and even if it hadn’t yet, she knew Ike might ask one of these days. “Not yet.” Her reply was curt.

Porter’s eyes widened slightly. “Not yet?” he repeated before narrowing his eyes. “You’d really tell him who you are?”

Monica knew he was a friend of her father’s, yet she found herself almost bristling at the way he spoke of Ike. “You don’t know him like I do.”

“Look.” Porter lowered his voice, a serious expression on his face. “I don’t know what you found out, and I don’t want to know, but…” He slightly furrowed his brow. “You shouldn’t get involved with Duke Crockford or that guy anymore.”

… That guy? She understood not wanting to refer to Ike by name, but referring to him as simply ‘that guy’?

Monica knew she should feel grateful at his clumsy way of caring about her, but she found she didn’t care, especially not with how he talked about Ike. “I’m sorry, Mr. Porter, but I can’t. I’m already involved, and that’s something that’s not going to change, whether he learns my identity or not.”

She had made a promise with the emperor of the neighboring country. If she did nothing, this country would either go to war or be devastated by civil war. Plus, she couldn’t stay away from Ike. Not now.

That… was something that’d probably never change. Just as the world was made of numbers and the sky was blue, Monica found herself drawn to Ike.

He was always on her mind, and she found herself wanting to learn more about him. She couldn’t stop looking at Ike, and whenever she looked at him, she noticed things every day. How he walked. How his blue eyes sparkled whenever he was truly happy. How he laughed both as Felix and as Ike. How he genuinely cared about her. How his blond hair shined in any kind of lighting, turning it golden. How those strong arms made her comfortable and safe. How that sad expression made her heart clench and made her want to make him happy.

Maybe… Maybe this was love?

“I see.” Porter didn’t say anything else, and Monica was convinced the conversation was over. She bent down, studying the mathematics books in the cardboard box, wondering which to pick. “You love that guy, don’t you.”

“L-Love?!” Monica jumped, startled, causing the cardboard box to tilt over and all the books inside it to fall out. “Aah, I-I’m sorry!” She quickly dusted off the books, checking them over for any damage before placing them back inside the box, hoping Porter couldn’t see her flushed cheeks in the dark room.

What… What did he mean by that? Did he somehow read her thoughts? Ike knew her well, and she had slowly gotten used to him seeing straight through her. She and Porter didn’t have that kind of relationship, though, so where did this come from?

Porter bent down next to her, copying her. “I’ve never fallen in love before, and I can’t claim to know you well, even if you’re my friend’s daughter. Still…” He gave her an intense look, causing her eyes to widen. “Something about how you talk about that guy makes me think it might be love.” He shook his head, something flashing in his eyes. “Then again, what do I know? I’m only a novelist who’s written about love. Not experienced it.”

Monica briefly tightened her grip on a book, that annoyance from earlier returning. “Quit calling him that.”

“You’ve probably heard this before, but I don’t recommend falling in love with him.” Porter kept his eyes on the books, his eyes darkening. “Especially given what you know about him and how he might’ve played a part in—”

“Don’t say it!” Monica suddenly stood up, trembling. Normally, she would’ve never been so rude, but she… hadn’t wanted to hear another word. She didn’t want to believe Ike played a part in her father’s death. Didn’t want to even entertain that possibility, yet it kept repeating over and over in her head like one of her nightmares. “I-I’m sorry,” she murmured, clutching Felix’s coat, her eyes dark. “He’s probably wondering where we are.” She turned away, intending on returning to the shop.

“Monica.”

She froze before slowly turning to face him. This was… the first time Porter had called her by her name. It might be the last, too, as Monica didn’t think she’d get to see him again.

Porter held out a couple of mathematics books, sadness and… something else in those dark eyes. “I thought you’d enjoy these.” She hesitantly accepted the books with both hands, glancing at them. “They’re free.”

She gasped before holding out the books. “I-I can’t accept these! At least let me pay for them!”

He shook his head, smiling a wry smile. “Even if you can afford it, you don’t strike me as the type of person to walk around with that kind of money.”

“Oof.” He… was right.

“Besides…” Porter walked past her, his back facing her. “Think of it as an apology.”

She blinked. “An… apology?” Had he said something wrong or insulted her in some way? She didn’t remember.

“For trying to tell you what to do. You’re an adult. You can make your own decisions.” He turned his head, allowing her to see the wry smile on his face. “Fall in love with whoever you choose.” Monica squeaked, flushing at how Ike popped into her head. “I can’t exactly make up for everything I’ve done.” A bitter expression appeared. “Or haven’t done, and I know you probably think I’m doing this out of a misplaced sense of guilt, but that isn’t it. Your father, my friend… He…”

“Mr. Porter.” When Porter turned to her, she smiled a soft smile, her chest warm. “Thank you.”

He didn’t need to explain. Even if Porter doing this was too late at this point, she understood his feelings. Understood he’d wanted to do something for his friend’s daughter so that when Porter died, he’d tell her father, his friend, he did his best to look out for her.

They returned to the front of the shop, Monica quickly joining Felix, who looked up at her and smiled.

“Hey, there you are. Did you find some books you like?” He glanced at the books held in her right hand before furrowing his brow. “What took so long? Did Porter forget where he placed the books?”

“Shut up.” Porter sat back down and continued writing.

Monica glanced around, trying to think of an excuse. Maybe something about the books? She briefly tightened her grip on Felix’s coat. Wait… That was it. She held out his coat. “H-Here.”

Felix blinked before accepting the coat. “You’re not feeling cold anymore?” She nodded her head furiously. He put it on before furrowing his brow. “Come to think of it…” He leaned close and poked her cheek, causing Monica to squeak. “Your cheeks look flushed. Was it warm back there?”

Being close to him like this wasn’t helping her cheeks or Monica herself return to normal.

“Um, well…” She fidgeted with her fingers, not meeting his eyes. She needed an excuse. Another one. She couldn’t exactly tell him they had been talking about him… and love.

Porter coughed from behind the counter. “Don’t you two have somewhere else to be? It’s late.”

At the not-so-subtle message, Monica paled. “Aah, I-I’m sorry!” She bowed at the waist. “W-We’ll leave!” He probably wanted to close shop for the night, and they were getting in the way of that.

“You’ve got a point. We should get going,” Felix said to Porter. After paying for the books, Felix smiled his soft, genuine smile at Monica. “You ready to go?” She nodded, allowing him to hold her hand once more.

They left the shop and made their way down the dark alleys, Felix pulling her close whenever she stumbled or almost bumped into someone.

“Ike…”

“Hm?”

Monica glanced at her necklace before making eye contact. “Thank you for tonight. I had a lot of fun.” She smiled a soft smile, causing his eyes to widen.

“Yeah.” Felix smiled his soft, genuine smile. His eyes were as soft as his smile. “It’s my pleasure. I had fun, too.”

Maybe… Maybe this was selfish of her. Maybe he’d even give her a strange look. She didn’t know what she’d do if that happened, yet she found her mouth opening anyway. “I-I hope we get to do it again someday.” She had stammered, but she had spoken clearly.

Felix stopped walking, his eyes wide, Monica letting out a soft sound of surprise. What… was with that expression? He slightly narrowed his eyes, scrutinizing her, almost causing her to squirm. Was what she said that surprising? Maybe she shouldn’t have said it? He chuckled, his eyes softening a few moments later. “Then in that case…” He moved in front of her and knelt before her, bringing her hand closer before kissing the top of it, causing her to flush. “We might as well make it official.” His eyes gleamed mischievously. “Will you go out on a date with me, Monica?”

Monica stared at him blankly. He just… said something crazy, didn’t he? “Eh?” Her eyes widened as what he said just registered. “A d-date?! M-M-Me?”

“Yes, you.” Felix smiled an amused smile. “I want to go out on a date with you.”

Monica’s mouth opened and closed. Did he… really just ask her out on a date? She quickly looked away from him. “U-Um, that’s…” She hesitantly looked back at him. “W-Why me?”

Felix’s eyes softened. “You might not believe me, but the only girl I want to go out on a date with is you.” He gently squeezed her hand, causing Monica to jump, as she’d forgotten he still held it. “Will you do me the honor of accepting?”

What… What was even going on right now? Did Ike just… ask her out? Why?

“I… B-But I don’t have experience," Monica admitted. "I’ve never been on a date before."

“Then you’re the same as me.” When her eyes widened, he grinned at her, his eyes gleaming mischievously. “We can experience it together.” His eyes softened. “That is if you’re alright with it.”

A date… with Ike? Their relationship was complicated, yet they were friends. They had gone out tonight as just friends… right? If she went out on a date with Ike, what would that be like? Maybe... it’d be something like tonight?

If that was the case, then…

Monica glanced at her necklace before straightening her back and tightening her grip on Felix’s hand. “Alright, Ike.” She smiled a soft smile, feeling that familiar warmth in her chest, the one she had long associated with him. “I-I’d be happy to go out on a d-date with you.”

Felix lit up, and Monica’s heart stuttered at noticing he looked just as happy as earlier. “Really? Thank you, Monica.” He sounded overjoyed.

Had she made him that happy? Not as the Silent Witch but as just Monica? It reminded her of the times she had made him happy in the past. How she had never liked seeing him unhappy and how she loved making him happy. How making him happy felt different and more special than making the rest of her friends happy.

They… were friends, and she still needed to talk to him about her father at some point. Even if she felt these confusing feelings for him.

Even if it might change things.

ZZZ

Isaac smiled a soft, genuine smile. He had just awoken from a light doze, so his head wasn’t yet fully alert and still lingering on the pleasant sensation from his dream.

… No, it wasn’t a dream so much as a memory. A memory of when he and Monica hung out together in the secret room of the library.

Isaac closed the book on magecraft and set it aside, furrowing his brow. Monica had written one of the papers in this book, and he had eagerly read it, hoping to learn more about magic and enjoying the chance to read more of the Silent Witch’s – Monica’s – work, especially when normally, he’d never get the chance to read this book. Monica’s paper, as always, was well-written and gave him a lot to think about. He had a few questions, though, and he hoped Monica would answer them for him.

Before he could attempt to speak, he felt a sudden, heavy, and warm pressure on his shoulder, almost making him jump. He turned his head, his eyes widening at seeing Monica’s head on his shoulder.

Monica had her eyes closed, her breathing slow, steady, and rhythmic, a smile on her face. Her normally tense body relaxed. The book she had been in the middle of reading lay open on her lap.

His eyes softened.

While he loved interacting with and watching the awake Monica, he also loved getting to see Monica asleep. He had seen her like this once before, although back then, Monica had been drunk. He reached out, gently stroking the dark circles under her eyes, his eyes darkening with worry. Clearly, she hadn’t been sleeping well lately, so it wasn’t surprising she had fallen asleep. Thankfully, it happened while he was here and while they were in private.

… No, maybe she… had done it on purpose? His heartbeat quickened. Maybe he was reading too much into it. He probably was. Monica only saw him as a friend after all, and she must be exhausted. Still…

Even if she only saw him as a friend, she trusted him enough to fall asleep. Maybe the books had helped her relax, but she had felt relaxed and comfortable enough to fall asleep even with him right beside her. It made him happy and touched by her trust in him.

It was selfish (and possessive), but he didn’t want anyone else to see this. See Monica like this. Only he should be allowed to see Monica in such a vulnerable state. No one else. Come to think of it… Cyril had seen Monica like this once before, hadn’t he? Isaac slightly narrowed his eyes, tensing up, his chest feeling tight. He didn’t like that reminder. At all.

Monica moved closer to him, his heartbeat skipping a beat at how she wrapped her arms around him, unconsciously seeking out his warmth. Just like… back in Corlapton. Her book slammed against the floor with a dull thump, and he knew he should be worried about it, as it was a library book. Something else caught his attention, though. Monica murmured something in her sleep, and when he leaned closer to listen in, all he heard were numbers.

Isaac shook his head, a wry smile on his face, relaxing despite himself. It figured numbers were all she cared about. He furrowed his brow. What should he do now? He didn’t want to wake her up, and she needed her sleep. He could continue reading and allow Monica to sleep on his shoulder, but he didn’t want her to sleep in that uncomfortable position, even if he was enjoying it.

Making his decision, he slowly unwrapped her arms, letting out a soft shushing sound at her sound of protest, and got up. He gently moved her head so that it rested on the sofa, tenderly tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and stroking her furrowed brow before picking up the book. After glancing over the book, he set it on top of her other books, his eyes darkening when he glanced at the cover.

She… had been in the middle of reading the book about body manipulation magic. He trusted Monica with his life and knew she was the Silent Witch. He knew she had only wanted to read it to study it, especially after encountering the intruder from the chess tournament. He still didn’t like it. Didn’t like how Monica had chosen to read about it right next to him.

He froze, a thought coming to him. Was it possible… she knew about him? No, that was impossible. Besides, the timing didn’t make sense… unless this had something to do with what she and Bridget had been talking about.

Isaac shook his head, walking over to the bed and pulling back the covers before walking back to Monica and gently ruffling her bangs. “You’re such a mysterious little squirrel,” he murmured. “I wish you’d trust me more.” Even as he said so, he knew… he was a hypocrite. He gently picked her up, Monica murmuring some more numbers, causing him to shake his head fondly. He made his way over to the bed and laid her down, his heart clenching when Monica let out another sound of protest, curling up into a ball on the bed, clearly trying to get warm.

He shouldn’t. He really shouldn’t. They were only friends, and she’d no doubt freak out when she woke up. If he lay down next to her, it’d only be out of selfishness. A selfish want and need to have Monica next to him.

Monica didn’t return his feelings (yet). She only viewed him as a friend, yet that didn’t stop his feelings for her. No, he desperately hoped that with each day that passed, she’d be interested in him. That she’d finally realize his feelings for her.

He… could be selfish for a little bit longer, right?

Isaac took off Monica’s and his shoes before taking off his jacket and getting in bed. He lay down, fixing the covers around them so that they wouldn’t get cold, his heartbeat skipping a beat when Monica unconsciously moved closer to him. He wrapped his arms around her, keeping her close, a feeling of calm washing over him.

What he wouldn’t give for this to become his life. This was a secret room only royalty and student council presidents knew about. Well, they and their fiancée. Monica wasn’t his real fiancée. She was only his fake one. What he wouldn’t give for her to become his real one. What he wouldn’t give for her to feel the same as him.

No, this… was alright for now. Getting to keep Monica close like this, even if it was only when she was asleep, meant everything to him. Even if she didn’t feel the same (yet).

Monica squirmed, moving even closer and wrapping her arms around him, his heartbeat stuttering. She murmured something, and Isaac, who had been expecting her to murmur more numbers, swore his heart had stopped.

“Ike…”

His name. She… was dreaming about him? Judging by the smile on her face, it had to be a good one. What kind of dream was she having? He desperately wanted to know.

Isaac ducked his head, his cheeks flushed, smiling a soft, genuine smile. Even if Monica only viewed him as a friend, it made him happy. So happy and warm. He closed his eyes, a silly smile on his face, hope growing in his chest.

Maybe… Maybe Monica was finally becoming interested in him?

Isaac wanted to see Monica. Right now. He wanted to get even closer to her and know everything he could about her. No, he didn’t think learning everything would even be enough.

He was hopelessly in love with her. Now and forever.

Maybe when he returned to the academy, he should look for her?

“Your Highness, we’ll be arriving shortly.”

“Hm.” He – Felix – turned his gaze outside. Rain poured outside, and the sky was as dark as a blot from a feather pen. Taking out his pocket watch, he slightly narrowed his eyes. With it raining and the sky as dark as it was, the rest of the students had probably left the school building by now.

Including Monica.

He sighed, shaking his head.

Getting to see Monica would’ve been great, especially after the day he had. He’d have to give up, though.

Monica had probably already returned to her dorm room.

What a pity. He had wanted to see her.

When they arrived, Felix briskly made his way through the hallways. He paused, his hand on the doorknob. The door to the Student Council Room was still unlocked. Someone was still here? Cyril perhaps? He opened the door, his heartbeat skipping a beat at seeing Monica sitting on the sofa. It was a crazy thought, and he knew it. Knew they were only friends, yet his first thought was…

Was she… waiting for me?

Monica stared intently at the chessboard on the low table in front of her. She had the white pieces. Was she playing in the dark by herself? Who was her opponent? When he entered the room, she had to have heard him, yet she didn’t look away from the chessboard, an expressionless expression on her face.

Was she absorbed in it like she did with her numbers?

He smiled a wry smile. That would be a problem. Not that he was complaining, as he knew how to snap her out of it. “You’re going to ruin your eyes like that.” He lit a lamp, fully expecting her not to look up.

Monica slowly raised her head to look at him, causing his heartbeat to stutter. Normally, she would’ve widened those pretty eyes and let out a peculiar and amusing sound. Not this time. She had a slightly dazed look in her eyes. “Ike…”

Felix wasn’t Ike right now. He was Felix. To Monica, though, he was Ike, and he had allowed her to call him that whenever they were alone. He smiled a gentle smile, his eyes softening at noticing the partially hidden necklace, sitting across from her. “Have you been playing chess by yourself this whole time? It’s getting late.” He paused, an urge welling up inside him. The urge from earlier. He finally got to see her. Maybe it was selfish, but… “I’ll walk you back to your dorm,” he offered.

He wanted to spend more time with her.

Normally, Monica would refuse, not wanting to bother him. Afraid of the attention they’d receive if people somehow saw them together. This time, she slightly narrowed her eyes, scrutinizing him for a few moments, something flashing in her eyes, before nodding, causing his eyes to widen.

He’d thought she would refuse again. He almost couldn’t believe it.

“Alright.” He stood up, his heartbeat quickening. “Let me grab some documents, and we can leave.”

Monica didn’t answer, instead staring at the chessboard once more. Had she wanted to finish the game first? Maybe it would be alright if—

No, they shouldn’t. It really was getting late. He didn’t want them to be locked in, even if he wouldn’t mind the extra time with her.

After grabbing the documents, Felix walked back over to her, expecting her to get up. When she continued staring at the chessboard, he held out a hand, furrowing his brow. “Monica?”

She glanced up at him before glancing at her necklace. She sighed, his heart clenching at the sadness in her eyes. For some reason, he got the feeling that… wasn’t about chess. She reached out, holding his hand and allowing him to help her up. Rather than starting to walk, he reached out once more, brushing his hand against the necklace before bringing it out of hiding, his necklace now in plain sight. She watched him, eyes dark with… guilt? Why?

They made their way through the school building, Felix glancing at Monica. She hadn’t spoken this whole time, and she still looked almost dazed. Was she alright? When she almost walked out into the rain, he grabbed her wrist, causing her to stop.

“Do you want to get wet? You need to be more careful,” he gently chided before letting go of her wrist and taking off his overcoat. He held up the overcoat over them both. “Here. Come closer.”

Normally, she might’ve hesitated and glanced around, unable to make eye contact. She might’ve protested a few times. Not this time. She silently moved closer to him, missing his wide-eyed look.

Yes, he was taking advantage of the situation, but this was the best solution to prevent either of them from getting wet. He’d rather get his overcoat wet than Monica herself. A thought came to him, causing him to give her a thoughtful look.

Monica probably could prevent herself from getting wet with her magic. Or would that count as using a type of weather spell? He’d heard weather spells were illegal, even for the Seven Sages. Although from what he heard of the reports about the magic duel, a sudden fog had descended on the forest, preventing everyone from watching the rest of it. That had to have been Monica, so maybe using weather spells was alright in certain situations?

“For example…”

Felix almost jumped, surprised to hear her speak. She had that dazed look in her eyes again, and he furrowed his brow, his eyes darkening with worry.

“For example, if you had to sacrifice someone to have your wish granted…”

… Hang on. She wanted to talk about this now? Why?

Monica stopped walking, forcing Felix to stop walking, his heartbeat skipping a beat when Monica turned to face him and made eye contact. “What would you do?”

Felix held up the overcoat over Monica, allowing himself to get wet. He didn’t hesitate with his answer. “If necessary, I would take that step.” He’d sacrifice as many people and manipulate them as much as he needed to so that he could become king. He needed to become king. “If it’s necessary for me to become king, I will surely do so.”

… With one exception.

He’d never sacrifice Monica. Never abandon her. He’d made his mind up a long time ago. That even if she never returned his feelings, he wouldn’t forget about her and continue being her friend, even after becoming the king.

Fear flashed in her eyes, and he suddenly felt the urge to reassure her. Before he could, Monica took a deep breath. “Why do you want to become king so badly?”

“Didn’t I tell you before? It’s because I have to become king.” He let go of his overcoat with one hand, reaching out and touching her cold cheek. “I have to become king,” he repeated in a softer voice. “I will make my wish come true.”

I won’t sacrifice you. He tried to reassure her with his eyes. I won’t abandon you, I promise.

Monica tilted her head, and for a few moments, Felix thought she leaned into his touch. He quickly realized that… wasn’t the case. Maybe it was arrogant of him, but she wouldn’t look this… expressionless when he was touching her like this. “Why is your wish so important to you?”

She had asked this before. No, she had asked him this many times before, and he hadn’t answered. He couldn’t. Couldn’t give her the answer she wanted.

He couldn’t tell her the truth. He couldn’t. He finally decided on a half-truth.

“Do you remember my friend? It’s his wish as much as it is mine.” Ever since his friend died, he had made it his goal to make his wish come true. To etch the name Felix Arc Ridill in the history books so that no one would forget the timid but kind prince.

She murmured something low enough he couldn’t catch over the rain, her gaze on her necklace. Before he could ask her to repeat herself, she made eye contact once more, speaking louder. “That’s why you listen to Duke Crockford.” It wasn’t a question.

Felix reluctantly let go of her cheek to wipe the rain off his face and out of his eyes. He was aware he wasn’t being prince-like right now, but he didn’t care. Right now, he was with Monica. “Yes, to make my wish come true, I can’t defy him.” Her eyes darkened with anger, and he found himself struck with the urge to… make her understand. This time for sure. “I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I promise I’m not his puppet.” He gave her a serious look. “I promise I’ve been retaliating against him in any way I know how.”

Like today. He had manipulated Emanuel Darwin, the Gem Mage, to assassinate Duke Crockford.

Last time, she hadn’t listened to him. Hadn’t wanted to listen to him. She had been convinced he was only a puppet and didn’t know what he was thinking.

Even if he couldn’t tell her about her past, he wanted her to know he wasn’t just a puppet. That he genuinely cared about her.

Monica avoided his eyes, her gaze on the ground. “When having to sacrifice something to have your wish granted, I’ve always thought I could do it easily.” She spoke just loud enough to be heard over the rain, her tone almost self-admonishment. Her head lifted, but instead of meeting his gaze, she stared at something to his bottom left. What was she staring at? “Because I never had anything precious. As long as I had numbers, that was enough.” As sad as that sounded, it was just like her to think that way. He found himself struck with the urge to tell her she had a lot of precious things. People and things that meant a lot to her. Him. “I really thought I could easily, cruelly abandon someone, but…” She reached out, still staring at something to his bottom left, his heartbeat skipping a beat at Monica brushing his hand with her own, even though he knew it hadn’t been intentional. She reached out again, this time with a shaking hand, her hand hovering in the space between them, although he couldn’t tell whether she shook from the cold or something else. “When I learned my father died for someone else’s wish, I didn’t know what to do anymore.”

Her father? This was the first time she had mentioned him. Back in Corlapton, she had mentioned wanting to learn more about him, and he had said the same back to her. His heartbeat quickened.

Was this… her way of telling him something about herself?

… No, more importantly… Something about this seemed familiar somehow. It was as if he were one piece away from solving a puzzle.

Why did this sound familiar? Monica had never told him about her father before.

Monica hesitated, fear in her eyes. For the first time since he had met up with her, he recognized the Monica in front of him. This was the normal Monica. Her shaking hand hovered in the space between them for a few more moments before she allowed it to drop, her eyes widening when Felix reached out and held her cold hand.

Now that he thought about it, this… probably wasn’t the best place to have a conversation. Not that they could stop now.

“Life isn’t necessarily like chess, with just black and white sides,” he spoke just loud enough to be heard over the rain. “Human relationships are complex. There aren’t always just two factions.” Was she struggling with a political issue? It could be possible, as she was one of the Seven Sages. He gently squeezed her hand, Monica giving him a wide-eyed look. “If you’re feeling cornered, rely on those around you.” He stroked her hand with his thumb, his eyes soft. “Rely on me.”

He had wanted Monica to rely on him for the longest time now. If she was struggling with a political issue, this seemed like the perfect time to rely on him. He’d help however he could, even if it meant having to get his hands dirty.

He’d do whatever he could to help the girl he loved.

Monica clenched her fists, her eyes glistening, her lip quivering. She avoided eye contact, that fear from earlier still in her eyes. Why? Why did she look like this? He didn’t understand. She opened her mouth before closing it.

Was what happened that bad?

“Monica?” Felix let go of her hand and stepped closer, reaching out and touching her cheek. She flinched at the touch, making eye contact again. He furrowed his brow. “Are you alright?”

Monica shook her head, tears starting to fall. “I’m sorry, Ike. I can’t… do it anymore.” His heart clenched at her tears. “I…” She sniffled, reaching up and holding his hand in place, causing his heart to stutter. “You don’t even know what he’s done.”

… That again. Why was she bringing that up again? She had mentioned it a few times now, and while he had a feeling he was missing something, he didn’t know what.

The strangest thing?

This… gave him a bad feeling. It was strange, as for the longest time, he’d thought Duke Crockford had said something to Monica. Maybe… Maybe it wasn’t that he’d said something so much as done something to her?

… Hang on. She… had mentioned her father earlier. Her father dying for someone else’s wish…

Felix’s eyes widened, and he swore his heart almost stopped. He felt a sudden chill that had nothing to do with the rain or his soaked body.

No. No, no, no. It couldn’t be.

It couldn’t be what he thought. That… wasn’t right.

Monica smiled a sad, awkward smile. He didn’t think he’d seen that smile before, and he didn’t like it. At all. “I… want to believe in you, Ike. That’s why I’ll tell you.” She took a deep breath, fear flashing in her eyes. “Venedict Reyn.”

Was that her father’s name? He gave her a puzzled look, confused and concerned why she was telling him this now.

“I…” Monica gave him a desperate look, her hand holding his in place shaking violently. She allowed her hand to drop before stepping away from him and out into the rain, the rain soaking her in an instant. When Felix stepped closer and held up his overcoat, she stepped back, Felix’s heart clenching at the sadness in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Ike. I wanted to believe in you, but I didn’t know for sure. I’m glad.”

If she was glad, why did she look so sad? He swallowed painfully, his stomach twisting uncomfortably. No, it couldn’t be.

It couldn’t be what he thought, yet everything… finally made sense. Like he had finally solved that puzzle.

What Monica told him earlier about her father dying for someone else’s wish… How she had looked so afraid of him after the New Year Ceremony, even though he hadn’t done anything to her... How she had kept repeating those strange, vague words about not knowing everything Duke Crockford had done…

For the longest time, he’d thought Duke Crockford had said something to Monica. Something so terrible she couldn’t bear to repeat it, even to him. He hadn’t ever thought of Duke Crockford doing something to her. Had never thought Duke Crockford would harm her.

But that wasn’t it. Duke Crockford hadn’t harmed her. Didn’t hurt her at the New Year Ceremony. He… didn’t need to, as he had already done something so unforgivable and terrible long before he and Monica ever met.

Felix stared at her with wide, horrified eyes. He allowed his overcoat to drop to the ground, causing it to splash water on them, before holding out a hand, desperately hoping and praying she’d take it, even as he knew he… didn’t deserve it. Was probably the last person she wanted to see right now. He swallowed painfully, his heartbeat racing. “Monica—”

She shook her head. “No matter what I choose from here on out or what future I end up in, please remember that name. Never, ever forget it,” she choked out, tears coursing down her cheeks. She turned and ran, and while Felix’s fingers brushed her arm, she didn’t look back.

“Monica!” he called out, turning and reaching out in her direction, even as he knew it was futile. Monica… was no longer looking at him. Could no longer hear his voice. He stood there, staring after her with his hand outstretched, even as he knew she… wouldn’t come back. Wouldn’t take his hand.

Maybe never again?

The heavy rain kept pouring on him, yet Felix didn’t register it. He couldn’t hear the rain anymore. Couldn’t see it. Couldn’t feel the clammy and sticky sensation of his wet clothes sticking to his skin.

Darkness surrounded him, and while that was nothing new, at least he had been able to somehow see himself and see his path forward, a light allowing his body to glow and illuminating the path forward. He had lived like that long before he met Monica after all.

No, this… was a lot worse.

This time, darkness engulfed him. He couldn’t see anything. Couldn’t hear anything. Couldn’t see himself or even… a path forward. What… was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to navigate through this darkness without any kind of light? Without a path forward? His heart raced, and he found himself trembling.

He… couldn’t. He was trapped.

ZZZ

Monica didn’t know why she didn’t realize it earlier. Didn’t know why it occurred to her as she stood in her dorm room, dripping wet and trying to dry herself off with a cloth.

Honestly, this was probably the worst timing to realize it.

Ever since she had learned Duke Crockford was somehow involved in her father’s death and that Felix… no, Ike was his puppet, she had felt this overwhelming fear of Ike. It wasn’t that she was afraid he’d hurt her. No, she had realized a long time ago Ike genuinely cared about her. This fear had come from the thought of… Ike being involved in her father’s death. That he had been involved and didn’t do anything other than listening to Duke Crockford.

That Ike was truly his mindless puppet.

Maybe… Maybe this fear of him hadn’t just been about that. Maybe she had felt afraid of him because of these feelings for him.

Contrary to what she wanted, he hadn’t allowed her to avoid him. No, they had… gotten closer. Much closer than she could’ve ever imagined. So close she… didn’t know what they were anymore.

Their relationship was complicated. Had been for a while now. They… were friends, yet something felt different. She didn’t feel this way about any of her other friends.

Only him.

She hadn’t wanted to believe Ike had been involved in her father’s death. Had hoped and even prayed for that not to be the case. Even so, she had… this doubt.

Maybe he had been involved? Maybe his wish was that important to him? Maybe she didn’t know him as well as she thought she did?

Thankfully, that wasn’t the case. Ike had looked genuinely puzzled at her father’s name, so he likely hadn’t directly been involved. Still, she… hadn’t wanted Ike to forget her father’s name.

She couldn’t let Ike become king. Couldn’t let this country go to war. At the same time, she couldn’t… grant her wish. Her wish of proving her father’s innocence.

If she wanted to prove her father’s innocence, she needed to tell everyone what Duke Crockford had done. If she did that, Ike would be executed, and she… didn’t want that.

I can’t. I can’t… let him die.

Yes, she had… made her choice a while ago. Not getting to talk to Ike anymore… Not getting to see him anymore… She didn’t want that. She didn’t want to lose another person who was important to her.

More than that, she… didn’t want to live without him. Couldn’t live without him. She wanted to see him a lot more. Hang out with him and see that soft, genuine smile.

She… wanted to go out on that date Ike promised her.

Nero’s words about love came back to her.

“You know how you look at an unfinished equation, and you immediately start wanting to know more about it, wanting to get even closer to it, wanting to plug numbers in and solving it? Love is a bit like that.”

Back then, only one person came to mind. While people were made of numbers, they weren’t equations. No, they were more complicated than any equation, and when it came to Ike, he… was more tempting and more irresistible than any equation she’d ever seen before.

She wanted to get to know him a lot better. Get even closer to him. Wanted to become the person who knew him best and become someone he could lean on. Even if she somehow learned everything about him, she didn’t think it would be enough.

She wanted more. A lot more. More of Ike. She… couldn’t get enough of him.

If she looked at it like that, then maybe… No, it wasn’t maybe.

Monica grabbed the spot where her heart was, her heart thumping loudly even now. “I love him.”

Since when? When did she fall in love so deeply with Ike that she didn’t want to remember what life was like before she met him?

She gazed down at her necklace, the necklace he gave her. The necklace she couldn’t stop wearing. Every time she wore it, it made her think of him and gave her strength. Not only had she started to like wearing it, she found she had started… loving wearing it. Loving having something Ike gave her so close, and she loved seeing his happy smile whenever she wore it. This… all started with the necklace. Back when she had wanted to wear the necklace again to thank Ike and make him happy. Had she… had feelings for him even back then?

While she wasn’t experienced in love, she knew these feelings for him hadn’t just suddenly appeared. They had existed inside her for a while now. Her feelings had kept growing and growing at such a scary and confusing rate that she hadn’t known what they were.

This… These feelings for him wouldn’t suddenly disappear with time. At least, she found herself hoping they didn’t.

Nero clicked his tongue from beside the window. “Took you long enough.” Looking closely, Nero’s fur was damp too. He had most likely been watching them.

“Sorry, Nero.” Monica gently picked up Nero and wrapped him in the cloth. She opened her mouth then closed it. She tried again. “You knew, didn’t you.” It wasn’t a question or an accusation. Just a statement.

Nero briefly closed his eyes, leaning into her touch. “From the beginning,” he agreed. “I knew this would happen eventually.” He frowned, his eyes darkening. “I still don’t like it.”

“I know.” Monica wondered not for the first time why Nero disliked Ike so much. Outside of those times when Nero had acted as her attendant, Nero had never interacted with Ike before. It didn’t make any sense.

It wasn’t just Nero. Porter had advised against not falling in love with Ike, too, although Monica knew he only said that because he had thought Ike might’ve been involved in her father’s death.

She… couldn’t stop these feelings for Ike. Didn't want them to disappear.

“What are you going to do?”

That was a vague question, yet Monica had a feeling she knew what Nero meant.

She hummed, stroking Nero’s back. “I don’t know,” she murmured. “Everything’s so complicated, and after what just happened, I don’t even know if he’ll look at me the same.”

“You mean because you mentioned your father’s name?” Nero furrowed his brow. She let out a soft sound of agreement. “It’ll probably take time for him to digest it, but…” He smirked a smug smirk. “I don’t think that will stop him from looking at you. He’s been looking at you this whole time after all.”

Again, why did Nero look so smug? He didn’t even like Ike. It didn’t make sense.

She shook her head. “No, he’s been looking at the Silent Witch. Not me.”

Nero huffed, frustration flashing in his eyes. “He’s known about you being the Silent Witch for a while now, and it hasn’t changed things.” He poked her chest with a paw. “He’s been looking at you this whole time, Monica.” He frowned, his eyes darkening. “As much as I don’t like it,” he muttered.

… Could Nero be right? Had Ike been… looking at her this whole time? At Monica and not the Silent Witch?

She decided to ignore his last comment. While Nero meant a lot to her and she valued his thoughts and opinions, she couldn’t stop loving Ike. Not now.

She loved Ike, and it was as simple and as complicated as that.

More importantly…

To prevent war and Ike’s execution, she needed to negotiate with Duke Crockford. She had to.

She still didn’t understand why Ike was so fixated with the throne. Why Ike’s wish was so important to him. She desperately hoped Heidi would be able to find out for her. Regardless, she… couldn’t let him become king.

She couldn’t allow him to plunge this country into war and chaos.

Her feelings for Ike, while important, would come after that.