Work Text:
A knock on the door, a bit frantic but firm, as it always started. With a quick check around the windows - burnt husk of a house, picked over smoking corpses, even more sun charred bodies - you take a moment to steel yourself before answering.
Through the peephole, the dark glow of nighttime lit with light pollution and the surrounding outskirts of the city, which wasn't that far from your doorstep all things considered, you find yourself looking slightly downwards at a short man.
Wearing a disheveled, weather worn red suit and white collared button up, a loose yellow tie half undone, he peered up at you, eyes wide and wild, dark hair that might have once been slicked back into something respectable but now looked greasy and messy. Most of his face seemed to house a very large, if slightly busted, nose.
“H-HEY HEY THERE, LOOKS LIKE YOUR LIGHTS ON - YOU TAKING ANYONE IN?”
Even from here, and him standing near on tip toes to stare up at the peephole, you can see the sweat on his face, the way his diluted pupils seemed to swallow all the thin white, bloodshot and watery, of his eyes. He bared a grin up at you, teeth shiny white with an ugly chipped canine. The pull of his face seemed to pinch into something more like a grimace.
“LISTEN, YOU KNOW ME - EVERY BUDDY'S FAVORITE number one rated salesman 1997-” He said this in a rush, his teeth clacking as he spoke, straining as his left eye twitched, “-IF YOU DON'T, THEN SUE ME! THE MOMENT I SET EYES ON THIS CITY I KNEW IT WAS BACKWATER COUNTRY, I EVEN SAID AS MUCH TO MY BUSINESS PARTNER BUT DOES HE LISTEN? No no no!!!”
By now you've noticed the oddest part of his character besides his eccentric talking style - wrapped around him in curly loops and knots was a dark thick rubber coated wire that connected upwards, a cupped black phone receiver pressed firmly to his ear. Hoisted up under an arm and held like a football was the rotary dial telephone itself, looking shiny, brand new. Trailing your porch looked to be another wire - the phone was unplugged.
“SO LISTEN UP! I'VE GOT A specil deal FOR LONELY hearts LIKE YOU!! JUST HEAR ME OUT!”
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*Who are you?
*I'm listening.
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The man brightens, the grimace turning up sharply on his big nosed face - he almost looks like he's shaking from excitement, and presses closer up to the peephole.
“THAT'S THE ATTITUDE YOU LITTLE slime! DEALS LIKE THIS ONLY COME ONCE IN YOUR-”
He suddenly interrupted himself, jerking back as if he was being tugged and turning his head as he pressed the phone hard to his ear, eyes darting off to look elsewhere. His preoccupied hand, still holding the rest of the telephone, half waved at you, an almost ‘wait a sec!’ gesture, as his voice turned low and mumbly.
“Mhm, yeah, yeah. Yep. Sure. Yep, eh, definitely.” He paused, expression darkening, face becoming obscure for a moment. “...Fine.”
Then he whipped back around, grin splitting his face, a now manic gleam in his squinting eyes.
“LISTEN, LISTEN! YOU'LL SCRATCH MY BACK, I'LL SCRATCH YOURS - IT'LL BENEFIT THE BOTH OF US! I JUST NEED A LITTLE genorisity HERE, JUST A BIT MORE TIME, A ROOF OVER MY HEAD TO GET OUT OF THE furghgaging SUN.”
The noise he made was odd, a tight grunt of a snarl, and his grin twitched downward a moment. Forgetting about the phone, he tried to sweep his dirty hand through his hair and instead dragged it along with the motion, wire swaying, tightening and shifting about his body, eyes darting this way and that before snapping right back to you.
“I'M…LOOKING FOR SOMEONE. HE MIGHT BE BACK BEHIND ME, OR HE'S GONE AHEAD, BUT I GOTTA FIND HIM BEFORE ONE OF THOSE FREAKS GET TO HIM FIRST. YOU LISTENING TO ME? I NEED TO FIND THAT crt BEFORE THEY hyperlink blocked HIM!”
His pleading made him shuffle closer to the door, another grimace on his sweaty face as he absently rubbed at his nose - you notice a smear of red now, crusted around his nostrils.
“I'M desperate HERE! I'M AN honestman HERE! BELIEVE ME! HAVE YOU SEEN HIM? A TALL GLASS OF WATER AND WITH LENS PRESCRIPTIONS THAT'LL RIVAL BULLET PROOF SCREENS, BUT DON'T BELIEVE anything you see on tv, HE CAN BE A REAL FIRECRACKER OFF AIR!”
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*I haven't seen anyone like that.
*There was a tall man here, but that doesn't sound like him.
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The brightness of his expression noticeably dimmed, a bit of a droop to his posture and even somehow his long nose, and for a moment he turned his head and seemed to be listening to his phone intently, still shaking and twitchy.
When he focused back on you he suddenly adjusted himself, the receiver between head and shoulder, the dial clutched in armpit, and the man clasped his hands together as if in prayer, chewed bloody fingernails as his gross fingers clenched tight, eyes wide and beseeching as his voice drew thin and begging.
“THEN YOU GOTTA HELP ME! GIVE ME A NIGHT. GIVE ME TWO NIGHTS! THREE! GIVE ME SOME genorisity, YOU slime, AND I'LL MAKE IT WORTH YOUR WHILE! JUST HELP ME STOP BEING THE it burns! ow! stop! help me! it burns! GUY AND I'LL HELP YOU STOP BEING THE all alone on a late night? GUY!”
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*Come in.
*You should leave.
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