Work Text:
Being Mobei-jun’s assistant is hard work.
The man’s demanding, easy to anger and a horrible communicator. Shang Qinghua has had to basically develop telepathic powers to be able to keep up with the demands of his job! There are days in which Mobei-jun doesn’t say a single word but that doesn’t stop him from ordering him around with grunts, glares and huffs that Shang Qinghua has to interpret and obey with haste and efficiency.
And don’t get him started on the work-life balance. The hours are just terrible, he’s basically on call 24/7! And while the paycheck is substantial, no amount of money is worth this much stress and lack of free time.
Shang Qinghua hasn’t been able to write in months!
Well, at least not anything that isn’t erotica featuring domineering CEO’s and their poor, poor secretaries that keep getting railed on the regular. But that doesn't count, since he writes most of it during work hours when his stress reaches levels so high he just has to let off some steam by his preferred method: fervently typing as many words as he can in a fifteen minute break while picturing his boss in extremely compromising positions.
Still, there’s a reason Shang Qinghua hasn’t resigned, several in fact, and to remind himself of that, he lists them down on a random scrap of paper while he waits for Mobei-jun to be done with his ‘meeting’ with his uncle (he’s made sure to have some security guys on standby just in case this is the day that Mobei-jun’s patience finally runs dry, of course).
Perk 1: Eye candy, so much eye candy.
That's the main reason he’s still slaving away in this company, even though this job was supposed to just be some ‘in-between books’ gig so he didn’t starve while figuring out the setting and characters for his next big hit.
Mobei-jun is hot.
He’s hot in a way real people are not supposed (allowed) to be.
Really, it’s almost like he’s a character straight out of one of Shang Qinghua’s books: the perfect man all ladies salivate over but who’s too detached to actually take them up on their offers until The One appears.
It’s not fair!
And to make matters worse (or better, so much better), it’s like the man’s allergic to clothes!
It’s bad enough in the office, where Shang Qinghua’s constantly having to deal with Mobei-jun removing his tie and opening the top buttons of his shirt (or, or, and this is just nasty, rolling up his sleeves and going around like a harlot with his forearms completely uncovered!).
But his suffering doesn’t end when he leaves for the day, of course not.
Since Mobei-jun has dealings with people from every timezone in the world, he needs an assistant on call at every hour of the day. For that reason, Shang Qinghua was offered a room in his extremely expensive penthouse two weeks into working together.
(Uhm, should rent-free housing count as a perk of the job? Eh, it’s not like it’s one of the reasons he’s choosing to stay. Sharing a flat with Mobei-jun on the other hand… Yeah, he adds Perk 2: And we were roommates! to his silly list.)
Or well, offered is a nice way of putting it.
What had really happened is that Mobei-jun looked at him one morning, when Shang Qinghua arrived at the office two measly minutes late, still sporting an impressive bedhead and incapable of stopping his yawning, and told him, “Live with me.”
Shang Qinghua blinked, answering, in his still sleepy state, with a simple, “Okay.”
That night his true torment began.
As soon as they arrived home, Mobei-jun took off his shirt.
Shang Qinghua squeaked and turned around (though not before he saw Mobei-jun’s hands move towards his trousers). Mobei-jun, of course, didn’t say anything, so Shang Qinghua had to guess which room was to be his and he installed himself there. Then he started working on dinner while Mobei-jun strutted around the penthouse in only his boxers (tight, so tight) and sat on his couch in a way that was way too seductive for Shang Qinghua’s mental well-being.
Really, the man needed to realize what he looked like. Anyone else would have mistaken this as an invitation and happily taken him up on it!
So yeah, apparently Mobei-jun’s a bit of a nudist and, of course, Shang Qinghua isn’t going to tell a man how he should dress in his own house, especially one who looks like that. So he is forced to endure constant showings of Mobei-jun’s glorious naked chest (and back, and legs, and abs) on a daily basis.
Stressful? Sure.
Liable to kill Shang Qinghua from blue balls? Absolutely.
Worth it and an absolute treat? You bet.
Shang Qinghua nods to himself, underlining perk one with gusto. This is absolutely the main perk of working for Mobei-jun. And not paying rent is also nice even if it means Shang Qinghua has to do most of the cooking.
Then again…
Perk 3: Yummy food from criminally expensive restaurants
Part of Mobei-jun’s job includes taking clients (or annoying family members) out for lunch which, of course, means he needs to know the best restaurants in the city. Or well, that Shang Qinghua needs to know them, and also which are best aligned with the preferences of both Mobei-jun and his chosen dinner companions, since he’s the one making the reservations.
That’s why it did not surprise him when, five days into working together, Mobei-jun drove them to the most expensive spicy noodles joint in town right after work.
It was a bit of an odd choice, that he will admit too. Most of Mobei-jun’s clients would be offended if he tried to take them to a place that served ‘plebian food’. (Which what? A single serving of noodles from this place costs roughly half the rent Shang Qinghua had been paying monthy on his shitty previous apartment! How’s this plebian?)
But well, there’s always oddballs and people that like ‘slumming it’ to show how ‘down to earth’ they are. And if catering to them means Shang Qinghua can eat the most expensive version of his favourite meal, then who is he to complain?
Mobei-jun clearly wasn’t used to this type of establishment considering how adorably confused he looked when reading the menu, so Shang Qinghua ordered for them both. He picked the best seller for himself and the least spicy dish he could find for his boss (who cannot handle the heat to save his life).
While they waited for the food, Shang Qinghua took out his phone and made a couple notes about the decor and ambiance in his ever growing restaurant spreadsheet.
Despite the effort he’d put into picking something Mobei-jun would like, he didn’t seem too impressed with it and even tried to get Shang Qinghua to finish it for him. The madman fed it to Shang Qinghua himself, like this was some sort of date or something! He was so lucky Shang Qinghua was a professional and didn’t make a habit of deluding himself.
“What do you think?” Mobei-jun asked afterwards.
Shang Qinghua chewed carefully. Honestly, these weren’t anywhere near the best noodles he’d ever had (how he missed that small shop run by the nice aunty near his uni) but it should do to impress western clients that always went crazy for ‘authentic cuisine’.
“Well it should satisfy the Americans, of course,” he said thoughtfully. “And it does have some vegetarian options so that’s nice. There’s no gluten-free noodles though, won’t that be a problem with their CFO? Then again, I think it was more a dietary preference than an allergy so we could run it past her and ask. She may be fine with having a ‘cheat’ day if it means trying ‘traditional chinese noodles’.” He snorted but sadly Mobei-jun didn't deign to share the joke with him. It was a bummer, his boss usually liked it when Shang Qinghua mocked their clients.
“It’s a good choice,” he tried again. “I’m sure they’ll find it exotic. It’s not like they can tell good noodles from this pretentious over-priced crap.”
Mobei-jun frowned, now looking thoroughly displeased, and Shang Qinghua wondered if he'd made a mistake. Maybe this wasn’t related to that business trip, after all. Maybe…
“Your uncle won’t be able to handle a single bite of the dish I ate,” Shang Qinghua said, shifting gears. “He’s such a baby when it comes to spicy food. Still, if you trick him into coming here, he’ll have no choice but to finish his bowl in a petty display of toughness. He really, really hates losing to you, doesn’t he? And then he’ll have to spend the whole night locked in the bathroom, suffering the most painful runs of his life.”
Mobei seemed to cheer up a bit at the thought so Shang Qinghua let out a sigh of relief. So this was the prelude of a prank, good to know. It was a bit out of character, but Linguang-jun definitely deserved worse.
He smiled at Mobei-jun who, of course, didn’t return it. But he couldn’t be too mad that Shang Qinghua had taken so long to catch on because he said, in his gruffest voice, “Let’s order dessert.”
Perk 4: Leftover gifts!
And speaking of Mobei-jun’s uncle and clients. The man is terrible at getting appropriate gifts for them!
Shang Qinghua periodically finds flowers, expensive watches, foreign chocolate and other kinds of stuff on his desk. Gifts that he’s supposed to send to Mobei-jun’s acquaintances for birthdays, weddings and other occasions. Not that the man bothers to tell him or give him so much as a hint about the intended recipient or reason behind the gift. Luckily for him, Shang Qinghua’s is very good at figuring it out.
He’s told the man a thousand times that he’ll take care of buying what’s needed (the gifts usually appear after Shang Qinghua has already bought and sent something to the people they are for, since he started scheduling it as soon as he realized it was a part of his job) but does Mobei-jun listen? Of course not!
Once, Shang Qinghua asked Mobei-jun what he was supposed to do with the surplus (Linguang-jun hardly deserves a birthday present, let alone two) and Mobei-jun had just glared at him and told him to, “Keep it.”
And again, who is Shang Qinghua to argue with his boss?
So now he gorges himself on tiny european chocolates worth their weight in gold and has more expensive watches and ties than he knows what to do with (and that’s not counting the ones Mobei-jun bought him on his third day because “You are going to dress in a way that won’t embarrass me”).
And well, maybe it stings that none of those things are meant for him (Mobei-jun apparently remembers the head of HR’s birthday but not Shang Qinghua’s?) but at the end of the day he’s the one enjoying them so it definitely counts as a perk.
Perk 5: On-the-clock bonding time with his best bro!
Mobei-jun is Luo Binghe’s… best friend? business partner? only person he finds tolerable besides his shizun?
And that means that they sometimes have business meetings where they basically judge everyone else in the business and plan world domination (Sha Hualing is often invited too, since she’s technically part of their alliance, but she’s definitely treated more like a valuable henchman than an equal).
Those meetings are usually in one of their offices, of course, but sometimes they need to discuss things off-record which typically means mini-golf, karaoke, restaurants and other ‘non suspicious’ places in which they ‘hang out as friends’.
Poor Sha Hualing has only been invited once to those outings and she made the mistake of bringing Liu Mingyuan along.
Why was that a mistake?
Because, of course, Luo Binghe had whined and whined until Shang Qinghua’s best bro, Shen Yuan, had agreed to accompany him. (Shang Qinghua doesn’t understand why he insists on playing hard to get when he folds every single time but that’s besides the point). The point is that Shen Yuan has a casual interest in the Liu siblings (he finds them hot, not that he’ll ever admit it) and Luo Binghe has a burning desire to monopolize his time and attention which makes him absolutely despise Liu Qingghe and his sister by association.
Their bowling outing had been a shit-show with Luo Binghe getting madder and madder every time Shen Yuan addressed Liu Mingyuan or asked her about her brother, until he’d apparently had enough and left to go sulk on a corner. A ploy, of course, to worry Shen Yuan who, as expected, went to check on him and reassure him that he was still the most specialest person in his life and yes, he would buy him some sweets and pet his hair if he came back to play with the rest of them.
So yeah, Sha Hualing doesn’t come to their outings anymore which is both a pity (her sass game is on point) and a blessing (she tends to use it to mock Shang Qinghua).
But the important thing is that Shen Yuan always does, which is great. Mobei-jun and Luo Binghe can hatch as many dubiously moral plans as they want while Shang Qinghua bickers and spends quality time with his best bro on the company’s dime.
And yeah, he may find the ‘double dates’ jokes that Luo Binghe keeps making a bit annoying but he can put up with them. Especially since Shen Yuan loudly protests that these are completely platonic outings every time he hears them.
Really, Shang Qinghua kind of pities Luo Binghe. The man must truly be desperate if he’s trying to reframe business meetings as dates just to get Shen Yuan to consider him in any kind of romantic light. It’s starting to get a bit pathetic, honestly.
And the mere idea of a ‘double’ date is laughable!
As if Shang Qinghua would waste his time hanging out with Luo Binghe and Shen Yuan if he was granted a date with Mobei-jun! (Sorry Cucumber-bro, you are cool and all but priorities!)
Still, going out with friends (or well, with a guy that’s his best friend but won’t ever admit it, the yandere that tolerates him because insultingly he’s the only person he doesn’t consider a threat to his ‘Shizun’s favorite’ title, and his boss who he’s pretty sure doesn’t consider him completely useless anymore) is fun, especially when Shang Qinghua gets paid overtime for it.
Perk 6: Getting to mess with stuck up assholes
What’s not fun is how much of an asshole Mobei-jun’s uncle is.
His father isn’t exactly a treat either but at least he had the decency to retire and leave the country (though maybe Mobei-jun forced him to? Blackmail could very well have been involved).
Linguang-jun is definitely the worst, though.
He’s also the only person in Mobei-jun’s family who at least pretended to care about him during his childhood (before he stabbed him in the back and tried to steal his business from him as soon as he took possession at barely eighteen).
Shang Qinghua suspects that feign kindness is the reason Mobei-jun puts up with him despite the multiple ways to get rid of vermin Shang Qinghua has brought to his attention (half of them weren’t even illegal!).
He’d met the bastard on his second day working for Mobei-jun.
Honestly, he probably should be grateful to Linguang-jun because he’s pretty sure Mobei-jun had been in the process of sacking him at the time. Which really was a bit of an overreaction over a silly accident.
So he’d spilled half his coffee on Mobei-jun’s pristine white shirt after tripping on literally nothing. It was not his fault, okay? He’d been walking towards his desk to offer him said coffee (the man looked like he could use a cup or ten) and Mobei-jun had decided to tie his hair up in a messy bun. Right there, in the middle of his office! Shameless is what it was! Shang Qinghua could see the bare nape of his neck and the way the muscles in his arms moved while he gathered the hair up, Mobei-jun had even been biting his lip in concentration! How was Shang Qinghua expected to pay any attention to the floor when that was going on? He was clearly the victim here.
So yeah, while Mobei-jun was in the middle of a tirade about his clumsiness and asking very impolite questions about the state of Shang Qinghua’s vision and the mental health history of his family members, Linguang-jun had entered the room.
He didn’t even bother to knock, he just waltzed in like he owned the place.
As soon as he saw what was going on, the snake smiled and made some passive-aggressive comment about how Mobei-jun would have trouble keeping the company in order if he couldn’t even keep his own shirt clean and his underlings in line.
Shang Qinghua didn't pay much attention to his words, though. No, he was far too busy recognizing the guarded, pained look in Mobei-jun’s eyes.
It was the look he himself wore when his mother forgot his birthday once again. When his step-father told him about a vacation the whole family but him had gone on months after the fact. When his father showered his new sons with extravagant gifts but didn’t have enough money to pay for his uni classes. When his step-mother kindly told him ‘I know you’d rather spend the holidays with your mom so don’t feel obligated to come to our house, dear, your father will understand’.
Disappointed but not surprised. Hurt but resigned.
Worse was that Linguang-jun had laughter in his eyes. He was clearly delighted at having found an opening, a flaw to exploit, on the usually impeccable Mobei-jun.
An opening that Shang Qinghua had created.
And well, Shang Qinghua was pretty sure he was already fired anyway so, for once, he’d decided to act on his anger.
(It helped that for all his money and power, Linguang-jun was far less intimidating to him than his own family was).
He took a deep breath, stepped forward, and emptied what was left of his coffee right on top of Linguang-jun’s head, ruining his shirt and his hair too for good measure.
“Whooops,” he’d said in his best deadpan voice while the two other men blinked at him in complete astonishment. “I can be so clumsy sometimes. Still, a senior executive such as yourself should take better care of your appearance. How can you expect your subordinates to look up to you when you’re such a mess? Let’s hope no client sees you like this! You’ll bring shame to your nephew’s company. Is that really how you are going to repay him for keeping you on despite all that embezzling you are so bad at hiding?”
“How dare- I’m not,” Linguang-jun gaped at him, torn between rage and fear. “Who even are you?!”
“My assistant,” Mobei-jun’s dry voice answered before Shang Qinghua could. “Uncle, go change, we’ll talk later.”
“But-”
“A client is scheduled to arrive in five minutes,” Shang Qinghua swifty lied. He walked forward, crowding Linguang-jun and forcing him to walk backwards towards the door. “If you really want to talk to Mobei-jun, I’ll try to pencil you in some time next Friday. You are family after all. But Mobei-jun’s very busy this month because of the merger so no promises, okay? I’m sure you understand. Or well, maybe you don’t since you aren’t on the project, but the details will be explained at the board meeting on Tuesday. You are a member of the board, right? I heard you had to sell most of your assets to settle that pesky lawsuit last winter but surely you still have some shares? If not, don’t worry, a company wide email will be sent on Wednesday, and you’ll be able to read all about it then. Anyway, have a good day, please send me the bill for the dry cleaning, I’ll take care of it. Goodbye.”
And with that he slammed the office door on Linguang-jun’s completely dumbfounded face.
“And good riddance,” he muttered to himself before remembering that Mobei-jun was still right there.
He turned towards him in a panic only to find the man shaking with silent laughter.
And that had been it for Shang Qinghua.
The point of no return.
Because Mobei-jun was beautiful.
He was beautiful even when he was a mess. When his hair was in a half-undone bun held only by a pen, his shirt ruined by coffee splatters, his face scrunched up unflatteringly with laughter and tears of mirth escaping his eyes.
Especially then.
How many people had seen their perfect, ice cold CEO reduced to a giggling mess?
Not many, surely.
Maybe, not any at all.
The thought gave him a rush of possessiveness so strong he almost felt dizzy with it.
“Am I still fired?” he asked, like an idiot.
The question broke the moment, because of course it did, but at least Mobei-jun had calmed down and didn’t look mad anymore.
“No,” he said. “I’m keeping you.”
Shang Qinghua had to grab the edge of the desk to avoid falling since his knees buckled at the declaration.
“Good,” he mumbled. “Yeah, that’s… good.”
Then Mobei-jun frowned, “How did you even know about the embezzlement? You’ve only been here two days.”
That, at least, Shang Qinghua could answer easily, and he proceeded to do so in detail in order to calm down his still furiously beating heart (nothing sexy about accounting doctoring, thank the gods).
So yeah, if Shang Qinghua’s being sincere (which he usually tries to avoid), he’s not staying at the company because of any perks.
Truth is, he’s completely, head over heels in love with his boss, cliche though that may be.
It’s too bad nothing will ever come from it (besides probably an anthology of smut stories set in very realistic work settings).
If only Mobei-jun would send him a hint, anything really, to give his poor heart some hope.
But there is none. Mobei-jun will never see him as anything other than a somewhat competent but annoying employee and Shang Qinghua needs to stop dreaming about impossible things.
He sighs and folds his silly list, pocketing it at the same time Mobei-jun enters the room.
“I have the car ready,” Shang Qinghua tells him, immediately falling back into work mode. “Though I don’t know where we are going? You blocked a couple hours of ‘shopping’ in the calendar.”
Mobei-jun nods and grabs his jacket and phone, managing to type at the same time he puts it on. “Tell the driver we are going here, we have a reservation in fifteen.”
Shang Qinghua frowns, checking the address Mobei-jun’s just sent him. “A jewelry store?”
Mobei-jun nods again, “We need some rings.”
And with that he leaves the room. Shang Qinghua scrambles to follow him while he tries to figure out what on earth they would need some rings for?