Chapter Text
1998 - New York City
You stand outside your job in a dimly lit alleyway. Working nightshift at 7-11 sucked ass. Never getting enough sleep, being overworked, and battling being able to make ends meet. Feeling exhausted and underpaid. You stuck your hand into your pocket, pulling out a pack of Marlboros and a lighter. You plucked a cigarette from the pack and lit it, taking a long, well overdue, drag, trying not to think about life. Leaning against the brick wall of the gas station, you let out a frustrated sigh. You quickly sucked down the cigarette, your nerves getting the best of you. Holding your arm up you checked the time on your watch 7:01 AM. “Fucking finally” you say before flicking the cigarette to the ground and snuffing it out under your shoe.
You make your way back inside the 7-11, walking behind the counter and into the back room to clock out. You pull out your employee ID card and swiped it in the machine, pressing the red OUT FOR DAY button. As you gathered your things you couldn’t help but notice a bright pink poster stuck to the cork board that was on the wall in the back room. You stepped closer to make out the words, Mindless Self Indulgence - Come Listen To Our Crappy Demo Live At CBGB May 23 11:00 PM. Shit that was later today. You paused thinking for a moment. Maybe this could be something fun, something to make you feel better about your shitty job and non existent love life you thought to yourself. A fun night of drinking and music? Sounded like just the right thing to make you feel like your good old self again. You pulled the pin out of the poster, taking it off the cork board and folding it up, placing it in your purse.
Finally you walked out the back door of the 7-11, making your way towards your 1995 Toyota Corolla. Rummaging through your purse you found the car key, pushing it into the lock on the drivers side door, unlocking it with a click. You opened the door and climbed in, slamming it behind you. You quickly started the ignition and backed out. As much as you hated this job, you were glad you lived close. Only five minutes of driving and you were home. You pulled into the driveway, putting the car into park and turning off the engine. Getting out of the car you made your way towards the back door. Taking out your key and unlocking the door. You stepped inside, shutting the door behind you, letting out a sigh of relief. It felt so much better to be back home, you thought to yourself. Sluggishly, you made your way up the stairs and into your bedroom. Throwing your purse on the floor and practically collapsing onto the bed. Pulling the blankets over yourself, you try to get comfortable. Even though your body aches from work. As you lay, you think of the poster, the concert. Something to finally look forward to, and it was just hours away. You found yourself already thinking of outfit ideas. You drifted to sleep, thinking of the concert, you could hardly wait.
The sunlight peeking through the blinds slowly woke you up. You groggily shifted in bed, not wanting to get up yet. Wait, what time is it? You thought to yourself, turning over to look at the clock on your bedside table. 4:16 PM, You flopped your head back down onto the pillow. The concert was in seven hours. You wished it was sooner so you could start getting ready. Slowly you sat up, pulling your legs over the side of the bed and standing up. Stretching your arms out over your head you let out a loud yawn. You walked out of your room, down the stairs, and into the kitchen. Opening a cabinet you pull out a can of coffee grounds, setting it down on the counter as you open another cabinet to find a mug. Popping open the top to the can and flipping open the coffee maker, you pour the grounds into a little compartment. Shutting it closed with a click. You poured a cup of water into the back, and pressed the Brew button. The coffee machine making whirring noises as you stepped away from the counter. Opening the fridge, you grab a plastic container of left over Denny’s. Ugh, soggy pancakes, you rolled your eyes, not even caring at this point. You grab a fork from a drawer and step into the living room, plopping down onto the couch. You grab the remote from the coffee table and turn on the TV. Clicking through the few channels there were available until you landed on some cartoons. You practically melted into the couch. Those overnight shifts weren’t doing any good for your grogginess. You grabbed the plastic to-go box, popping it open and slowly eating the soggy pancakes.
Time went by quick sitting there chewing the pancakes tiredly and watching kids shows. You didn’t even notice the coffee maker buzz. The mug of coffee sitting on the counter cold. You finished your pancakes, setting the plastic container down next to you on the couch. You let out a tired sigh, lifting your arm up to check the time. 8:43 “Holy shit I’ve been laying on the couch for a while.” You say shooting up off of the couch. You make your way back up the stairs and into your room, opening your closet. You flicked through your shirts, finding a cute cropped, pink spaghetti strap shirt that you cut the sides into a pattern. Pulling a hanger off a rack, you picked a pink and black, leopard print push up bra. You threw them both onto the bed, moving to the dresser to find bottoms. You sit on the floor and pull open the bottom drawer, sifting through jeans and leggings until you find a black leather mini skirt. Throwing it onto the bed as well. You shut the bottom drawer and stand up, opening the top drawer. You quickly pull out a pair of pink fishnets, and a black thong, placing them with the other items of clothing. You paused for a moment, looking around your room until your eyes fixed on a silver and black studded belt hanging in the closet. Quickly grabbing it and throwing it onto the bed. You ducked down, looking at the various shoes you had on a little rack under your hanging clothes. You pulled out a pair of New Rocks, black leather tower platform boots with fake razor blades looped through the laces. You pulled your baggy shirt over your head and slid your pants and underwear off. Clipping the bra on and adjusting it into place, pulling the pink top over your head. You pulled the thong up, knowing no one would even see it, but it made me feel good wearing it. Unraveling the fishnets, you bunch them up and pull them over your legs. Snapping the waistband in place. Grabbing the leather mini skirt, pulling those up as well, zipping them on the side. You pulled the studded belt through the loops of the skirt and buckled it snug to your hips. You checked the time again on your wrist watch, 9:30 PM. You still had a fair bit of time. You sat down on the bed, grabbing your platform shoes and pulling them over your feet, tying the laces tightly. You walk over to your full size mirror, checking the outfit you threw together out. You tried to dress according to the color theme of the flyer. Could definitely use more accessories, you thought to yourself. Moving to your jewelry box, you pulled a black choker decorated with pink stars around your neck, clasping it in the back. You also found a chain necklace with a brass knuckle charm, clasping that around your neck as well. You pulled various beaded bracelets onto your wrists, most of them made by you. You felt pretty pleased with your outfit, checking yourself one last time in the mirror before heading into the bathroom.
Opening the cabinet under the sink, you pulled out your makeup box, placing it on the counter. You flipped the clasp that held it shut, lifting the top open and beginning to rummage through your makeup. You grabbed a bottle of foundation and a sponge, glopping the liquid onto your face and blending it in with the makeup sponge. Next you rubbed concealer under your eyes to hide your eye bags from the night shifts. Blending that it as well with the sponge. Taking a dark cream you use it to contour your nose and cheeks, blending it in with your fingers and adding highlight in between the contour. Your face looked much brighter and awake now. Letting out a sigh of relief, you rummage through your makeup again, looking for eye products to use. Grabbing mascara and eyeliner, you carefully brush the mascara through your lashes, making them a nice black color. Pulling your eyelids down you smudged the dark eyeliner on your eyeline, defining your eye shape. You smudged it with your finger, trying to go with more of a messy but cute look. You topped it all off with a pinky brown lip gloss. You looked at yourself in the mirror, running a hand through your messy hair. Grabbing two hair ties you pulled your hair into two, cute spiky buns. Plucking pieces of hair down to frame your face. You looked at yourself in the mirror with a smile, pleased with the look you had going on.
You took a glance down at your wrist watch, 10:28 PM. “Finally”, you huffed, knowing it was time to get going. You grabbed your purse, running down the stairs and out the back door of the house, locking the door behind you. You walked over to the car, pulling your keys out of your purse and unlocking the car. As you sat down, you grabbed the folded, pink flyer out of your purse. CBGB, that was a few streets down more so into the city, you think to yourself. Starting up the car and pulling out of the driveway. You knew the way to the venue since you had been there once before to see a local band play in ‘94. You pulled around the corner of a street, eyeing various houses and people you passed. It wasn’t long until you found yourself pulling up to the venue. It was a bit more run down then last time you had been here. Old graffiti and paint now chipping off the walls of the building. You parked a couple rows away, seeing as the show is about to start and most spots are taken. You shut the engine of the car off and walked up to the entrance, a line of people going out the door. You stepped in line, standing a bit nervously, swaying side to side. You tried to cool your nerves, taking deep breaths. Oh how you wish you could smoke a cigarette right now. Finally you made it through the door. The smell of smoke and sweat filled your lungs. Hey maybe I can get a smoke in, you think to yourself. You get to the front of the line, greeted by a worker wearing a lanyard around their neck. “It’s twenty dollars for one ticket, and I’m going to need to see some sort of Identification.” You nod at the worker “of course” you huff digging into your purse, pulling out your wallet. You handed the worker a twenty dollar bill and your drivers license. The worker inspected the card taking a good look at you, they shrugged and handed you the card. “You can go on in.”
You were beyond excited, you squeezed your way right to the front. The band wasn’t out yet but the crowd was already a bit loud and wild. Screaming and and there was even a fight breaking out on the opposite side of the venue than you. People pressed up against you, you were a bit uncomfortable but extremely happy to have gotten up to the edge of the stage. You checked your wrist watch once again, 11:05. They were late, but it made sense, they’re a band. It takes a while to set up and get ready. Your heart was racing, it had been years since your last concert, and you were still in high school back then. You looked around for a moment, noticing a few people smoking cigs, deciding to pull your pack out and light one to calm yourself. Soon after lighting your cigarette the lights began to dim, causing the crowd to grow even wilder. People whistling and a few “HELL YEAH”s being yelled out. You took a drag in anticipation.
Finally the music started to fade in slowly, the intro to the song *Bitches*. The drummer came onto stage, her poofy, brown and blonde, hair bouncing as she sits down at the drum kit. The bassist stepping out as well, a thin girl with blonde, almost white hair sticking up out of her head in rows. Soon after a bigger man holding the guitar made his way out, shaking his head to the beat of the intro. The crowd roared, you knew they were waiting for the head of the band step out, and so were you. You threw your cig onto the ground, stomping it out. After all the anticipation, he ran out on stage as the beat dropped. Yelling and jumping in the air as he screamed the lyrics. He was a tall, slim, yet toned, man. His hair was hot pink and glued into spikes on his head. He wore a pink suit with a white, open, button up underneath. The skin peeking out underneath seemed tempting to you, but that thought didn’t even seem possible. A lead singer of a band with you? Yeah not even in my dreams, you thought to yourself. Starting to let yourself go you danced to the music. Throwing your arms up and jumping erratically. You didn’t even know the lyrics yet you were screaming energetically, letting the music overtake your senses. The lights coming from the stage were quite mesmerizing as well. Various colored lights shooting into different directions with the beat of the music. The song ended almost as fast as it started. The singer coming back to the middle of the stage. “Having a good time tonight motherfuckers?” He yells with a smirk. The crowd responds with loud screams and cheers. You overhear a girl yell “I LOVE YOU JIMMY!”. Jimmy, that was his name. You looked up at him, his chest now wet with sweat. Ugh, you tried not to think about how attractive he looked up there on stage. His spiked hair messily flopping around as his open shirt revealed his glistening chest. Your thoughts were cut off by Jimmy’s voice booming through the mic, “Aww thank you.” he said sarcastically. Even motioning a tear running down his face with an exaggerated pout. The next song started up loudly, the crowd coming back to life again. As much as you loved the sound of their music, you found your focus only on Jimmy. You just couldn’t help yourself, even his voice when singing drew you in. It was harsh but also arousing. Making your skin crawl. You tried to snap yourself out of it, slamming your hands onto the edge of the stage. This briefly caught the attention of the singer, his eyes locking with yours for a moment before he was back to jumping around erratically while yelling to the song. The moment made your stomach drop, but… in a really really good way. You wondered if he thought anything of that little glance. You knew you were looking at him with an infatuated stare. You wondered if he noticed.
It felt like the show started and finished so fast while you were practically entranced by this man. People started to file out as the band remained on stage to pack up their equipment. You stayed, standing nervously at the edge of the stage, still in the same spot. You were attempting to gain the courage to talk to Jimmy, but your nerves and lack of immediate cigarette didn’t help your case. What snapped you out of your nervous haze surprised you. “Hey sweetie, whatcha still doing sticking around here?” The pink haired man said to you from the stage. You didn’t even know what to say, finally stuttering out “Uhm.. I’m sorry, I just…” Oh my god this was a train wreck. You were a red hot mess and this man you’ve been drooling over for well over an hour is talking to you? Calling you sweetie? “Why don’t you come up here?” He says smugly, reaching out a hand to you. You nervously took his hand. It was warm and calloused but that only made it better. He pulled you up onto the stage in one quick motion. You stumbled for a moment before catching your balance. “Y’know, I saw you staring at me practically the whole show.” You gulped. Fuck, he definitely noticed. You were scrambling for words to say, mind racing and heart pounding. “I’m sorry, I just.. really like yourrr… outfit.” Oh my fucking god that sounded so dumb. You mentally face palmed. “Yeah right, I’m not that stupid. You weren’t just looking at me in a way that said oh my god I love his clothes.” He said in a mocking tone. He grabbed your arm, pulling you close to him. Your heart was practically beating out of your chest. You could feel the warmth of his body radiating onto your skin. The feeling made your mind spin. He leaned in, speaking in almost a whisper, “You were looking at me in a I wanna fuck him silly way.” Jimmy said with a cocky smirk. The words made your clothes feel all of the sudden tight on your body. It felt unreal. “I couldn’t help myself..” you say looking down at the ground. Too nervous to look him in the eyes as this scene played out. “What’s your name anyways sweetie?” He asked, his voice dropping a bit lower. It made you go wild inside. “My name is “y/n.” You said swaying back and forth anxiously. “How about this cutie, give me like ten more minutes to finish packing up, and I’ll bring you back on the tour bus. Let’s call it a little VIP treatment.” He said in almost a whisper. You skin crawled. “O-okay.” You stuttered, taking a seat on the edge of the stage. You couldn’t believe this was actually happening…