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She put a ton of effort into picking out her outfit.
Cecelia isn't quite sure what exactly Mage wants from her. She's not pushy, she's not touchy in that way, and she doesn't stare where everyone else does. It's only a matter of time though, maybe despite everything about her, she believes in sex after marriage? Maybe she's shy, though that goes against nearly everything she presents openly as well.
Cecelia isn't sure, which rubs her the wrong way. She likes knowing just what to expect.
Usually, with boys, and every other girl, or anyone else for that matter, they've wanted sex from her. They've initiated it. Within minutes or hours or days, the longest someone else waited before Mage, was two months. She thought that was nearly impressive, his restraint, until she felt his restraints, strong magical iron chains. She gave him no kudos, no praise, after that. (Aside from what he asked of her. She doesn't want to think about it.)
She knows Mage and her are going to have sex. She just isn't all that sure as to when.
If she initiates it, if she hints at it, then maybe she'll get it over with.
Mage would be nice. She'd probably be gentle, and she would make jokes the entire time. She might use a strap-on, or she might just use her fingers. Cecelia would welcome any touch that came from her, she thinks, no matter if it hurts.
Mage loves her.
So it’s okay.
That's why she took so long getting ready for this. She had both her sister, Cathrine, and her brother, Ashton, help her get dressed. She didn't outright say why she wanted to try extra hard today, but she has a feeling that at least Ashton knows.
She had Ashton do her hair, braiding it back with pink and gold ribbons into two fluffy brown pigtails, leaving only her bangs free to curl around her face. He did her makeup, that she frantically assured him will stay, she'll make sure of it, she promises. She won't waste his efforts, though he didn't comment on it.
Cathrine helps her pick which bikini to wear. She suggests yellow, which Cecelia gently derails, gesturing towards her wardrobe. Nearly all pink and white. Cathrine sighs loudly at her and helps dig through her wardrobe. She tells her it doesn't just have to stick with her real clothes, she can get anything else too. What does she think is best?
They end up with everything that even vaguely resembles a swimsuit from within her closet scattered across her room. Cathrine doesn't like any of her current options, to which she gently reminds her about the concept of infinity.
Ashton comes in then to help, having heard their crashing and banging and shouting.
He gestures towards a set that looks nearly like lingerie, and tells her to change the color. Change the straps too, make it a push up. That's what you're going for right?
She wants to show off, he's right.
She does as he suggests, then poofs herself into the scant fabric.
Oh!
It's pretty!
The hem is a golden lacey-imitation, water-safe. Real golden thread is woven into the material of the pink bikini, glittering in the light. The small, tight top pushes up her chest, making it look much larger than it is. The bottoms are just barely not quite a thong, with thin golden strings tying it closed. The pink and gold compliments her light brown skin perfectly. Cathrine grabs a pair of shoes for her, pink platform flip-flops, with a golden strap across the top. Her pink, white, and gold waist beads tie everything together.
She adds her golden jewelry, hoop earrings, necklaces, bracelets, and an anklet. She actually feels so pretty!
She does a spin, giggling, and asks her siblings how she looks.
Cathrine says she looks really pretty! Ashton gives a small smile and thumbs up, though he looks like he knows something she doesn't. He usually does.
Yay!
She hopes Mage loves it!
They don't have sex that night.
Mage complimented her, “Ahh that's really pretty babe! Woah, is that real gold? I didn't know they put that in clothes, that's so cool! You're so cute, Sea! Get it? Coz we're at the beach!!”
Oh Cecilia loves her!
But…it's just…she was expecting to have sex.
The day was so, so much fun! It was!
She just expected sex is all.
At the least, she expected for Mage to be slack-jawed trying not to look at her boobs all day, or for her to be more touchy than normal. All she got was help walking across the sand, when her canes kept sinking. And a cute jar of commemorative sand. She's so thankful! Just…so confused.
So very confused.
♡♡♡
She's been bending down way too far lately. In way too short skirts and low cut tops. She wants Mage to look at her!
Cecelia just wants for Mage to love her! Well…she knows that she loves her, but she still hasn't initiated anything. It's not a…bad thing, she thinks. It's just strange.
Mage just offers to pick things up for her instead. She says she's concerned about her back or legs. She'll even poof the thing into her hands to give to her, not asking why she didn't do the same.
Cecelia really, really appreciates the care!
Mage is just so sweet, she makes her weak in the knees! (More than she usually is of course.)
She wears bralettes, tube tops, near-lingerie, actual lingerie. She wears skirts, miniskirts, booty shorts, tiny little dresses, just panties. Mage doesn't stare, she just looks and acknowledges it, as if that were any other part of her body. It's so, so sweet! It is! Really!
Cecelia is just…really confused.
♡♡♡
“Oh this looks so cute! Should I get it?” She asks about a super cute lingerie set she sees being advertised.
“That's sick! Sure babe, go for it!” She gets in response.
No, you'd look so hot. No, I can't wait to take it off of you. Nothing. Just loving support.
“I've always liked this scene! I think they’re so…romantic.” Cecelia comments about the movie they're watching. The characters are making out after having just gotten back together. The scene changes to one of their bedrooms, and well…it continues a bit further.
“Oh yeah, it's kinda cool. I liked when they still hated each other! When she threw that food all over him! That was pretty funny!” Mage exclaims, hitting her joint, and paying more attention to her than to what’s happening on the screen.
She didn’t take the hint.
“Whats that?” Mage asks, looking over her shoulder.
“Oh! Um, it's a sex toy I think.” She answers, stupid vibrator ad playing in the background from her phone.
“Ah that's cool. Wanna watch a movie?” Mage asks, gesturing towards the tv.
Ugh, dang it!
♡♡♡
Cecelia just needs to be more direct!
That will do it, for sure!
When Mage is sitting on the couch, she sits nearly on top of her. When they lay in bed she curls around her, petting at her. When they're in the kitchen, she holds her waist. When they walk, they hold hands. She traces at her ribs, rubs up and down her arms, her sides, her shoulders. Mage just seems to like the occasional massage, and she can't blame her! Cecelia is good with her hands! Four thousand plus years of being an imprisoned Djinn will do that! Still though, she doesn't get the expected reaction.
It’s a bit…saddening. Disappointing.
She’s not disappointed in Mage! Never! She’s disappointed in herself for not knowing how to find what buttons she wants pressed. Just what is it that will make her crack?
She needs to find out.
Does she only like something niche? Not just the normal human-ish body? Feet maybe? It wouldn't be that strange knowing her, though Cecelia wouldn't love if that was it. She doesn't like her feet. She doesn't like having feet. She would tolerate it though for Mage.
She rests her feet in Mage's lap as they watch a show together. Nothing. Whilst cuddling in bed together, she wraps her arm around Mage, underneath her shirt, throwing her leg comfortably over hers. Again, nothing.
She's perfected small, innocuous-seeming touches over the years, and adds that to her current attempts.
She wraps an arm around Mage's waist or shoulders, to no results. Mage just assumed that she was wanting help standing or walking, and acted accordingly. Super sweet! Not what she was looking for. She snuggles her face right into her small (Actually very tiny) chest whilst they cuddle, but Mage does nothing. She gently coaxes Mage to lay on her (Not very big either) chest, and she only ends up falling asleep. She sits on her lap, wiggles on her lap, but no!
Ugh!
Just what is she doing wrong?
♡♡♡
Kissing! Duh!
Most people like kissing, and they kiss pretty often! Maybe Mage wants more kissing!
She tries her best to make out with her at every opportunity. Sneaking small pecks that she tries to extend at every chance. Before breakfast, after breakfast, after either of them shower, when Mage hands her anything, when Mage makes her laugh extra hard, when they have to separate, when they see each other again, at every free moment! Mage usually kisses back, which she loves, maybe she's finally gotten it!
They make out on Mage's bed. Everything goes perfectly! Cecelia has her arms wrapped around her waist, and Mage is very gently holding onto her upper arms, tapping her fingers into her skin. This will be it, she knows it!
“Mage! Mageee!! Tell ‘em I don't got ‘is whatever! I didn' chew it!! Tell ‘em!!” Homura barges into the room, jumping up onto the bed right behind them both.
“Shit dude, what'd ya do?” Mage asks him, taking her hands away.
Damn it. Cecelia loosens her grip, slowly letting go.
“Homura. If you do not give it back I will destroy all of your stuffed animals.” Mason says from nowhere, suddenly looming right in front of the bed, eyes blazing in quiet fury.
Damn it all.
Mage tries her best to diffuse the situation, whilst her brothers yell back and forth.
That was a failure.
She tries again!
Not at Mage’s house this time. Her two brothers are just so much, one member of her family at a time is enough. Just the one she wants to kiss please! Not the hellhound that yells and bites constantly, and not the quiet scary wendigo either. (Plus, Mason is mean. She wouldn't mind if it was directed at her, but he's mean to Mage. She does not like that. Homura, she has slightly less problems with, aside from the sharp teeth and black fur he leaves everywhere. She doesn't like his volume either, but it's not too bad.)
It'll definitely work this time! It has to!
Her Dad, Felix, is hanging out with his friends ‘bowling’ (Probably having an orgy). Ashton is hanging out with his friends (Minus Mage, who is of course in Cecelia's bed). Cathrine is hanging out with some girl from school (That she definitely has a huge crush on). The house is empty!
Just her and Mage.
On her bed. Together.
Cecelia kisses Mage, interrupting her right in the middle of one of her ridiculous stories. She wraps her arms around her, one hand gripping gently around the back of her neck, the other around her waist. Mage kisses back, gently grabbing her forearm. It's nice. They make out for probably a few minutes (three minutes and thirty-eight seconds, her internal clock says). Then, well…Mage pulls back.
“Babe! I just remembered somethin’! That dude? The one I was just tellin’ you ‘bout, he ended up setting the whole room on fire! It was sick!” She exclaims, waving her hands around, going back to her story.
Cecelia nearly sighs right then. Clearly that didn’t work.
♡♡♡
“My spine kind of hurts, could you…could you help me get undressed, please?” Cecelia asks, looking down at her hands.
“Oh yeah, of course, comin’!” Mage says, dropping everything to come help.
Oh, this is working!
She squeaks when she feels Mage's hands on her. Mage is efficient, undressing her quickly. Then she takes the proffered pajamas, and helps her into them. She touches only where needed, then gently pulls her hands away afterwards.
“You comfy now? Let's lay down.” Mage says, grabbing her hands and coaxing her to lay in the bed.
The only thing they do is cuddle.
Dang it!
Cecelia walks out of the bathroom at her Mom's house (carefully, without her canes), with her towel barely even wrapped around her. It’s loosely draped more than anything, pretty much only covering the bare minimum.
“Babe, babe c'mere. I gotta show you what Eulalie just texted me!” Mage exclaims, beckoning her towards her own bed, joint dangling from her fingers.
“Um…I don't want to know about my cousin having sex right now. If that's what she told you. Especially not when we're in her house.” Cecelia mumbles as she comes closer.
It's Cecelia’s house too of course, but these days she stays with her Dad much more than her Mom, Medusa. Mage lives closer to her Dad.
Mage doesn't even acknowledge her near nudeness, she just pulls her by the arm (gently) to sit on the big bed. She shoves her phone into her face, showing her the messages.
“It’s your house too! See look, Ce! She got like a shit ton of stuff from Denis for Aidan's party this weekend!” She says happily, showing her the pictures Eulalie keeps sending. A big bag of weed, some various colored pills, a bag of mushrooms, a sheet of acid, and a small bag of cocaine.
“Oh, that's nice.” She responds, cuddling into Mage's shoulder. Her position lets the towel fall nearly to her lap, leaving her bare chest to press into Mage's arm.
Mage glances over, but doesn't really acknowledge it much more than that. She goes back to excitedly talking about her plans for Aidan's party.
Ugh!
They slept together that night. The normal kind, the actual sleeping kind. Mage in her ‘matching’ pajama set (Only technically matching because it's all covered in mismatched cows), Cecelia staying nude. Mage did nothing. Again.
♡♡♡
“Um Mage…” Cecelia starts quietly.
“Yeah Ce? You need somethin’?” Mage asks, looking up from the stove. She's making them both quesadillas, her favorite thing to cook.
“So…I have a question.” She mumbles, wringing her hands together anxiously.
“Yeah? Go ahead. What's up?” She turns to face her, almost leaning back onto the (hot) stove, but stopping herself.
“Am I…do you…did I…are you…um. Do you not want to have sex with me…?” Cecelia whispers, blinking rapidly, looking down at her feet. She can't look at her.
“Huh? Did you…not know? I'm ace. Asexual! I thought Ashton would've told you.” Mage says, casual, as if she hasn't just flipped her whole world off its axis.
“Oh that! That makes sense. A lot of sense. I'm sorry.” She says with a shaky smile.
They talk about it over lunch.
Then they end the night cuddling together in her bed. Just cuddling. Well, maybe they kiss a little too, but that doesn't count! They're okay.
♡♡♡
Cecelia is oddly relieved. She really is. It's a breath of fresh air not having to perform. She doesn't have to dress up, she doesn't have to show off, or beg and plead. She doesn't have to have sex, she doesn't have to act like she wants it. She doesnt have to get raped fucked all the time, exactly how the other person wants. Her opinions actually matter! It's so strange, it's so lovely.
She loves it. She does.
It really is so nice.
Just…she finds herself feeling conflicted.
It's so great that Mage is asexual! It is, really, she's so happy that they don't have to have sex. She just…kinda wants to. She never really wants to have sex, but now with Mage? Of course she does! Her girlfriend is so loving, so caring, so sweet. She's so nice, she's so funny. Since they've been together these last few (Wonderful, amazing, everything she's ever dreamed of) months, Cecelia has been thinking about doing everything with Mage! If she sees cute date ideas, she thinks about doing them with Mage. If she thinks about cooking, Mage is there. If she thinks about traveling, Mage is there. If she thinks about moving away from her Dad, it's with Mage. Everything is with Mage. She loves her! She loves everything about her!
So…say if she wants sex, she wants it with Mage.
And um. She kinda wants it. Sex.
She masturbates okay! She's not a child, despite the way people treat her. Just…masturbating isn't often what she's wanting. She rarely wants sex, but when she does, she doesn't just want to masturbate. She wants to have sex. At the least, something approximating it.
She's asexual too! That's what Ashton told her, and she trusts his judgment. So is he! He has sex pretty often, and well…maybe she's asexual like him, not asexual like Mage, who never wants it, not ever. She doesn't think it's a bad thing…just conflicting.
Mage said that she can have sex with other people, she did. She doesn't want sex with other people though, she wants sex with Mage. Which is…inconvenient at best. At worst…it makes her feel evil. She should just feel relieved that she doesn't have to put on a constant show begging for sex she doesn't want.
She should feel entirely grateful.
♡♡♡
It's been a few weeks since Cecelia discovered why her advances weren’t working.
Mage has been just so sweet! Not that that’s anything new, she just feels that it's noteworthy to mention. It just makes her feel worse.
She’s just so horny!
It’s frustrating! It’s annoying!
She should be so grateful that Mage doesn't want sex, but right now she’s anything but.
So…she’s been thinking.
A little bit. About an alternative to rubbing herself sore.
Sex with Mage.
That's what she wants, that's what will fix her.
So…she has an idea.
An awful, evil, selfish, dehumanizing idea.
Not rape! She is not raping Mage! Never! Eugh, never, not ever! She would never do that to anyone, least of all Mage. The idea is still really bad though, just not quite as bad as rape, she thinks. It’ll just…get it out of her system. Then she’ll stop thinking about it.
It should work!
(She hopes.)
♡♡♡
So! Going about her idea!
A few days later, Mage is hanging out with her brothers. Well she’s hanging out with her friends, which are her brothers friends too. They’re also Cecelia's and her brother's friends, but she said she wanted to stay home. Her Dad told Cathrine to go with Ashton and Mage, and he went off to hang out (probably have sex) with his friends.
The house is empty for at least the next few hours.
It seems like now's the perfect time!
Now or never!
Oh, oh she’s so nervous. She’s never actually done this before, but she knows she will be able to do it. Just oh! She has to psyche herself up.
Okay!
Her old Lamp is set atop her shelf, amongst some books, plenty of jars full of sand, and other knick-knacks. The Lamp is gorgeous. An ancient clay-mockery oil lamp, instead made in solid gold. It’s adorned in pink and white gems, diamonds and pearls, quartz and topaz. She could get back into it with barely a thought from any distance, but now she wants to do it manually.
She picks it up and carries it to her bed, setting it down in the center. She climbs up to sit beside it, anxiously staring down at it. Okay. Do it now.
Cecelia rubs the Lamp, once, twice, three times.
Obviously it works.
♡♡♡
Cecelia appears within her Lamp.
She's in the ballroom right now, a big, open space. The floors are perfectly polished white and gold tiles, the walls are covered in pillars and murals (Courtesy of her) and drapery, the ceiling in chandeliers and tapestries. Everything is some shade of pink, white, or gold, as per nearly everything else she owns.
It's gorgeous, it is. She designed and made, remade, perfected it over the years (and years and years). It's changed plenty, but she's fond of this current iteration.
She spins in place, then gets to work.
She floats to the middle of the room, magical lights dimming behind her as she goes. Only the smaller sconces along the walls, and the main chandelier glow now. Good, the lighting is much more personal.
She floats to a stop, right in the middle, right underneath the biggest chandelier. Diamonds and crystals clink near-inaudibly above her, amongst the flickering flames of the never-ending candles.
Cecelia takes a deep breath. Okay, now or never, she can't chicken out.
She raises her arms, bringing them up towards her chest. Right. She thinks about Mage. About every little detail, about her skeletal structure, muscles, organs, skin. About her hair, straight and ever-changing (currently purple, cut long and jagged). Her skin, pale and nearly unmarred, her slightly slanted purple eyes, bright and shining with joy. She thinks of her outfits, so ridiculous and funny, thinks of what could be underneath. She thinks of her personality, always making jokes, telling silly stories, so sweet, so caring, though so obtuse. Her voice, low and slurred, but loud and confident. She thinks of her Magic, wild and untamed, powerful and nearly overwhelming. That's…that's good she thinks.
She claps her hands together, and the noise echoes across the room.
Magic swirls around her, in front of her, pink and gold. It smells of sugar, of cotton candy, with a faint bitterness hiding beneath. She hums in her throat, watches as her Magic swirls and coalesces in front of her.
She watches as bones are made, blood, muscles, organs, skin. Hair grows down, long and quick, then clothes poof into existence, covering her skin.
The clothing, if you could call it that, is so ridiculous it makes her laugh. It’s so Mage. The clothes are horrible, an outfit based around the idea of sex. It looks like an ad for a sex store, or a Bachelorette party gone…strange. Her bra is just boobs! Her shorts have a penis on them! Her shoes have little human figures as heels, but they're having sex! Her jewelry is genitalia, earrings, necklaces, bracelets.
Maybe this will work!
“Oh shit, hey babe! You're so hot today, I love that dress!” Mage says, standing in front of her with a big smile.
She wouldn't say that. She would not say that.
“Thank you!” Cecelia responds giggling, then oh what the heck, she lunges at her.
“Woah!” Is all that Mage gets out, before she slams into her.
Cecelia just made her from the ground up, but she still forgot how very weak Mage is. She can not support another person, even a skinny one, not fully. She can help Cecelia walk or stand, but not when all ninety pounds are near tackling her. Consequently, down they go.
Cecelia makes sure Mage doesn't hit her head, making the tile briefly soft, but she still lands fully atop her, their legs crisscrossing. She doesn't waste time slamming their lips together. Mage makes a small sound, but kisses her back immediately.
Mage kisses so sweetly! Cecelia doesn't think too much about what she tastes like (Like her Magic, bittersweet cotton candy), as she licks her way inside of her mouth. Her skin tingles at the contact, Magic and power, warm, wet skin, hard, solid teeth.
(The only Magic here is her own. It's so very obvious. She tries her best to ignore it.)
She doesn't even realize when she starts grinding down on the thigh slotted between her legs. Then she feels Mage grinding up against hers. Oh! Okay!
She doesn't stop. Neither does Mage.
They kiss and nip at each other's lips. Mage is so gentle, and Cecelia tries her hardest to stay that way. (Her sharp canines do nip a tad too hard once or twice though.)
This is just what she wanted. Right?
“Babe, didn't realize you'd wanna be on top. Won't that hurt your back?” Mage mumbles against her skin.
She's so caring.
“I'm okay, don't worry. We’re um…in my Lamp, so I can't get hurt.” Cecelia assures her.
“Oh cool! I don't think I remember that…! ‘S cool though!” Mage exclaims. “You still comfy?”
“Mhm, I'm alright, I promise!” Cecelia answers.
Mage smiles and kisses her again. One wet peck, two, three, then she's grabbing her neck, pulling her closer. She kisses and sucks down her neck, as far as she can reach.
Okay, Cecelia can take the hint! She flips them over, giving Mage free reign to do as she pleases.
She sure does.
She puts her mouth against every inch of skin that she can reach, bruising Cecelia's skin as much as she can. It feels so great, much better than she imagined. Mage is gentle, but the marks sting, and she knows she'll feel them later.
Mage laughs when she lets out a small moan, kissing over the mark on the top of her chest. Mage pulls the straps of her pink dress down, mouthing at her chest, at the brown nubs. Her chest is so sensitive, she can't stop the second moan that comes from her throat. Mage sucks marks all over her chest, leaving a trail of bruises from her neck, down her shoulders, to all across her chest.
Mage pays extra attention to her chest. She sucks at her nipples, flicking her tongue over the small nubs. She alternates, making sure both sides of her chest get the same amount of attention. It feels so good! She keeps squirming and whining, until Mage puts her thigh back between hers to grind up against.
Things continue that way for a long few minutes (nine minutes and fifty-one seconds, to be exact).
Then Mage starts scooting down. She trails her mouth across her skin, then down the pink chiffon of her dress, rucking it up to her midsection. It's nearly funny how little her dress covers right now, just the middle of her torso, not the top, not the bottom. She does giggle, just a tad.
“What's funny, Ce?” Mage kisses at the pink bow on her white thong.
“Nothing really. My dress isn't covering me at all, I think it's a bit silly.” She smiles and messes with the fabric.
“You're still dressed, yeah! Want it off? We can do that!” Mage tugs at the fabric, clearly intending to discorporate it.
Cecelia poofs the dress away herself, she doesn't want to give Mage an existential crisis. Would that happen? She isn't actually sure…
She won’t think about it.
“See, Ce, ‘s that better?” Mage asks, rubbing her thumbs into her thighs.
She hums and nods, hair bouncing along with her.
“Cool!” Mage exclaims, then she's mouthing over her panties, over the big wet patch.
Cecelia moans, soft and quiet, and bites at her lip. Mage smiles against her, and licks one long, warm line over the wet outline. Then she's pulling at them, and Cecelia barely remembers to poof them away in time. Mage uses Magic way too much to keep up with. (Why does she know to use it, but still can't? This…Mage…is an extension of Cecelia's Magic, so theoretically maybe she could use Cecelia's Magic? She's not really sure, and she doesn't wanna think about what could go wrong.)
Mage's mouth is so very warm as she licks through her wet core. She wants more, this is so nice. She gets more, it's as if Mage is reading her thoughts (Can she?), with how fast she switches to sucking at the top of her. She squeaks, closing her thighs around Mage's head. Mage snickers and keeps going. She alternates between sucking at the sensitive bundle of nerves at the top of her, and licking her way into her hole.
Just as she thinks she may be about to come, Mage pulls away.
“I just thought of an awesome joke right now! Okay, so what's a lesbian’s favorite food? All you can eat!” Mage exclaims, laughing loudly.
Cecelia smiles and giggles. This is just what she imagined. Her orgasm being ruined, interrupted by a silly joke. She loves Mage. (But…this isn't Mage. Mage doesn't want sex. Ever.)
Mage keeps up her snorting laughter, but she gets back to work. The vibration against Cecelia's skin is nice, but it’s…hard to focus on. Mage builds her up to orgasm again, and she comes.
It's good. It feels good. Great. Perfect. Amazing. Soo worth it…mhm…yeah.
Mage coaxes her through it, dragging out her orgasm as much as she can. It's overwhelming, overstimulating. She flinches, twitching imperceptively away from the attention. Mage kisses her skin one last time, then pulls away.
“Was that good? You…good, Ce?” Mage asks, tilting her head in concern.
What?
Oh. Her face is hot and wet. Right, right.
“Oh! Mhm I'm alright!” She wipes her cheeks, ignoring her tears, “It was really good!”
Cecelia grabs Mage by one of her silly necklaces, and pulls her down. She kisses Mage, and she tastes like her. Mage tastes like burnt sugar and salt, though the last part is at least partly from the tears streaming down her cheeks. She kisses her as if she has what she needs, a way to fix her, fix everything that's wrong.
Cecelia flips them again, then puts her tongue right back into Mage's mouth. She kisses as if Mage is her lifeblood, is the only way to save her. She barely gives her much warning (Though, does she even need it?), before she's tracing a hand down her body. She palms at her crotch, rubbing gently through the fabric. She unbuttons them, with dexterity she rarely appreciates, and slides her hand underneath.
She's quick. Cecelia glides a finger, two, through the wet slick of Mage's core. She massages at the top, then quickly moves to press a finger inside of her. Mage moans into her mouth, twitching her hips up towards her. She licks along her teeth, nipping at her lip, then presses a second finger inside of her.
The slow caress of her fingers must feel good, because Mage keeps moaning. She didn't imagine she would be quiet, she never is, but wow this is a bit excessive right? She doesn't stop though, of course not. That would be mean.
Would it?
She keeps fingering her, caressing against the spongy little spot inside of her, and flattening her palm to rub against the top of her. Mage keeps moaning, keeps kissing her back. She probably won't be long ( Cecelia is glad. She doesn't think she could handle her lasting much longer), she can feel how she clenches around her fingers. Mage ruts up against her hand, moaning down her throat. She clenches tightly around her, and moans again, as she (Finally) comes.
Cecelia doesn't pull away immediately, she massages her through it. The moment Mage relaxes, she's pulling her hand away. She slumps down atop Mage, separating their mouths, and buries her face into Mage's neck. She's soft and warm and feels real.
If she doesn't look up, if she doesn't reach out for her Magical signature, if she doesn't think too hard, it could be real.
Mage doesn't say anything, for which she's very grateful. Maybe she's only staying quiet, because that's what Cecelia wants. That really must be it. That thought makes her tears pour down much faster than before, pooling into the junction of Mage's neck and shoulder. This isn't real.
This isn't real.
This isn't Mage.
It never was, it never will be.
A warm hand rubs her back, petting down her spine, soothing her. The touch is nice.
She drifts.
♡♡♡
Cecelia hears talking.
That's the first thing she notices. The very distant sound of talking, though she can't quite make out any words. Then she notices just how cold she is, the tile of her ballroom is cold and hard, uncomfortable to lay on.
Why is she laying here again?
Oh. Oh.
She Magic's herself and the floor clean, then poofs fabric over her body. A soft pink turtleneck sweater, and a long white flowy skirt. She doesn't bother with shoes.
Oh no, ugh, there's more talking. A questioning tone.
She summons a mirror to stand in front of her. Her hair is a mess, so she fixes it, two pigtails tied up with white bows. Her face is red and blotchy, tearstained, so she cleans it. Plenty of hickeys peek out from her turtleneck, so she heals them (She leaves the rest. Just for now). She looks normal enough now. She hopes.
She plasters on a smile, steadying herself, then she leaves her Lamp to talk to Mage, to her girlfriend.
The real one.
♡♡♡
She appears in the middle of the room, standing right next to her bed.
Mage is standing in front of her smiling, “There you are, Ce! What were ya doin’?”
Is she nauseous? She thinks she may be nauseous.
“Um I was…I was just in my library. I was trying to find an old book.” She says quietly with a shaky smile. She doesn't look at Mage's face, instead staring down at her own hands.
“You…good, Ce?” Mage asks, tilting her head in concern, reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder.
Oh. Oh no. No, no, no!
Why'd she have to go and ask that?
She sounds just like….she looks just like…just like herself.
Cecelia's gonna be sick.
“Mhm, I'm alright!” She nods frantically.
Shit. Why’d she say that? She brings a hand up to cover her mouth, her shaky smile.
She shoves Mage's hand off of her shoulder (She's a horrible girlfriend), and runs to the bathroom.
She slams the door shut behind her, locking it. She can barely fall to her knees (Back to the real pain of walking, of running, of slamming down onto the hard floor) in time to throw up into the toilet. She makes it, but only just.
She can hear Mage at the door saying something, but she can’t parse what it could possibly be.
Her vision is so blurry, from the tears streaming down her face, from the lack of oxygen. Her heart is beating so very fast, thudding in her chest. She gags again, retching into the toilet, throwing up only the pink and gold of her Magic. She's sick.
She can't believe she just did that.
She's a horrible, horrible girlfriend.
She’s a horrible person.
Who would do that?
She made a fake version of her girlfriend, of Mage, and she, she. She touched her. She touched her nude body, where Mage would never allow. She made her want it. Not the real Mage, but what difference does that make? She raped her!
She even still has the bruises that, that she left on her.
She wraps a hand tight around her own throat, pressing against the bruises, making them hurt.
She can’t breathe. She doesn't deserve to breathe.
She retches again into the toilet, sobbing and choking as she does.
Oh fuck, she can’t believe herself.
There's knocking at the door that she can’t bear to answer, Mage's worried questioning. Mage could just open a Door, she could break the lock, anything. Mage is such a good girlfriend, giving her space. She's worried, so loudly concered, but she isn’t intruding.
Look, Cecelia, take fucking notes!
She can’t bring herself to move, to breathe, to think. She can't do anything. She shouldn't do anything.
She doesn't.
Mage quits knocking at the door eventually, though Cecelia thinks she heard her slide down to sit on the floor at some point.
She can hear her talking outside of the door. She's talking about her day. About how desperately Aidan was flirting with Octavia, how she watched them when they turned. How Ashton was fawning over Lincoln, blushing and nervous. Then about how much of Denis’ weed she and Eulalie had smoked together while half babysitting Cathrine (Though she's only two years younger than Ashton, but still). She says much more, Tanner coaxing Coco and Landon away from doing anything stupid, Samuel stopping Tanner from doing anything stupid himself. Cray talking to himself, then flirting badly with Nyx, who talked over him the whole time. Then Nhu and Nyx's never-ending arguments, or friendly debates, whatever they call them, that are interrupted occasionally by Dalphon agreeing with Nyx, just to support her. Denis and Dulce with their perfect love life, holding hands exchanging ‘I love you's’. Mason flirting with (nearly harassing) Philippa, Homura and Lucio playing with Tanner’s dogs. She doesn’t stop. She keeps listing little details as she thinks of them, interspersed with her jokes and laughter.
Cecelia loves Mage.
The real one.
That's all that she can think.
She can breathe again, taking small breaths. The oxygen rushing suddenly to her head makes her dizzy, sending splotches across her blurry vision. She feels a bit less queasy, now that she’s thrown up all the excess Magic she's ingested. She can think now, her head isn't buzzing as much anymore.
She feels much more numb, but she isn’t completely distraught now.
Time to…get up.
She takes her time standing up, not trying to put any more undue stress on her legs. She flushes the toilet, and cleans up. Then she washes her hands and face.
Okay. One last deep breath.
She steps towards the door, unlocking it and pulling it open.
Mage had apparently heard her shuffling, and decided to get back up. She’s standing right in front of the doorway, looking up at Cecelia. She looks worried, so very concerned.
“Are you feeling better now, Ce?” She asks, reaching out for her.
Damn it all.
Cecelia wraps herself around Mage, and poofs them to lay atop her bed. She curls around her, feeling as Mage's shoulder gets wet with her tears. Mage mumbles small bits of praise and encouragement as she rubs at her back.
Mage lets her cry, and she is so very grateful.
“I'm-I'm sorry” Cecelia gets out between her sobs after some time (She's not sure. Her thoughts and inner clock are all wonky).
“What're you sorry for? You didn't do anything.” Mage reassures her, rubbing soothing circles into her back.
Cecelia sobs into Mage's neck. She can't tell her. She'd act like it was all cool, babe, but she would be so, so upset, so disgusted, and she knows it. She can't tell her.
“Nothing…I'm just sorry.” She mumbles, whimpering.
“It's okay, Cece. Promise.” Mage kisses the side of her head, nuzzling against her.
Cecelia can't tell her. Not not, not ever.
But she can tell her what she feels.
“I love you. So much. I love you so, so much, Mage. Everything about you. Please don't ever change.” She sobs out, voice hitching.
“What? I love you too, Cecelia. I won't change, promise.” Mage rubs at her hair, her neck. Soothing her like a spooked animal.
Oh, Cecelia loves Mage.
She really, truly does.
She loves everything about her.
Just as it is.