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Stella and Kelly saw Ivy in the hospital. She didn’t know what happened. Was Ivy ok? Then she saw her, Esme. Their aunt. She was her father’s sister. She cut her off a long time ago. And Ivy too. Ivy didn’t deserve it, that much Stella knew. Bandages, an IV on Ivy’s left arm, her eyes narrow at Esme, her blue eyes perked, smirking at Stella.
“Stella don’t.” Kelly whispers. “I know…” Esme walked towards them, “Well… you answered my call for once.” She scoffed. Stella felt anger, but she felt her husband rubbing her back to calm her, she nods. “How is she?” “She is fine.” “What happened? You were vague on the phone.” “She had a panic attack and fell. She was just being dramatic.” Stella narrowed her eyes at her aunt, if you can even call her that. This was wrong. Deep in her core. “Excuse me? Dramatic?” “Yeah, so? The doctors said she is losing weight, but not that big of a deal, she is young I suppose.” Stella stared at Kelly, his eyes swimming in anger too.
“Let me see her.” As Esme was about to respond, the doctor came out. Dr. Frost. “Stella. Are you family to Ivy?” She nods, “Yeah. She is my cousin.” He nods, “Did you want to see her?” Esme nods, “Yeah, I do.” Stella held Kelly’s hand tight, anxious to see Ivy’s condition. “Just brace yourself, both of you. She has bruises on her arms we didn’t see initially on intake.” “Bruises?” “I suspect from the fall like her aunt has mentioned. But…” “But what…” “I think some of her bruises were older.” “Are you saying Ivy has been abused?” “The evidence is sort of pointing to it.” Stella felt herself go rigid. Kelly said, “Thanks.”
He nods, leaving the couple alone. Stella let go of his hand, and she saw Ivy, asleep. She held her hand, she was only 15, and was so treated like nothing. “Ivy… I am here. I am here sweetie.” She smiles sadly. She sobbed, crying against the lifeless teen. Kelly sat down, kissing Stella’s head, letting her emotions fly. “I got you babe.”
Hours passed, Ivy started to open her eyes. ‘Where am I?’She thought. She felt a rush of pain, making her gasp. She gasps, seeing bruises. Then she felt someone holding her hand, “N-no…” She rasps. Stella lifts her head, “Ivy?” “N-not real….”
“I am real Ivy. And Kelly is here too. She gasps, “Y-you can’t be here. I am d-dreaming…” Stella gently cups her cheeks, but Ivy flinched, “I am sorry Ivy…” “I- I thought you didn’t care.” “What?” “Esme said you don’t care.” She whispers, tears threatening to spill. Ivy sighs, “And then you are here, we haven’t seen each other in a long time.”
“I know… Esme is toxic Ivy, and that led to us not seeing each other for a long time.” She nods, “Ivy… did she hurt you?” She avoided her cousin’s gaze, “N-no…” “Ivy… this is serious. Please. I just want to help.” Kelly nods, “All we want to help you.”
“What if she hurts you…” She trembled. Stella sighs, “Hey… let us worry about that okay?” She said softly, “S-she would hit me… sometimes she wouldn’t let me eat food. I would cry, and she said… I should suppress how I feel. Then I would want to reach you, but she said it’s nonsense. That you would never love me again.” “Oh Ivy…” Stella nodded, kissing her forehead, “I promise you, she would never hurt you again.”
Esme smirked, clapping slowly, “Wow… Stella look at you.” “This stops now.” Dr. Frost came in, “I heard all. And I got DCFS involved.” Esme gasps, “You people had no right!” Stella got up, “We did, you hurt Ivy, for what?! You manipulated her, you put your hands on her!” “Pathethic!” She spat at Stella. Police came, “Ma’am you need to come with us.” Stella turned her back on her aunt, letting the cops take Esme away. Ivy had tears, “Y-you did that?”
Stella sighs, “Of course baby. You are family to not just me, but to Kelly. “She is right kid.” Ivy nods, she cries, “I just expect you to leave me…” “Not anymore Ivy.”
Ivy moved slowly in the apartment, both of them helped her. Ivy held onto Stella, she felt ashamed. She didn’t tell Stella her old back injury that Esme caused. She didn’t want Stella to worry again. Stella turned around, seeing Ivy move wonky.
“Hey.. are you ok?” She said softly. She sat down on the couch, “U-um…” She stuttered nervously. She whimpered. “Hey it’s ok. Nobody is going to hurt you sweetie.” Ivy nods, not caring her tears fell. “Sorry.” Stella’s heart clinched when Ivy’s small voice came out, “Hey, come here.” She nods immediately nuzzling Stella’s chest, sobbing, small hiccups came out. “M-my back…” “What do you mean?” “I-it hurts. Like sore. I guess.” “Esme.” But all Ivy could nod. “May I? I will be gentle,promise?” Ivy nods. Stella sighs softly, and lifting Ivy’s shirt, and saw the bruises on her back. She stood still, examining them. The greens, and the nasty yellows. Stella gasps, “Oh Ivy…” “I am sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. None of it.” She softly whispers.”C-can you rub my back?” Stella nods, “Yeah.” She gently rubbed the teen’s back up and down, Kelly came in, seeing Stella in tears, Ivy sniffling. His heart broke for the both of them, unsure what could happen. What can happen? Stella slowly lowered Ivy’s shirt, then the unexpected happened. Ivy launched herself against Stella’s neck, sobbing. Hysterically. Stella widened her eyes against Kelly. Not out of fear. Or being uncomfortable. “Shh… I got you baby.” She cradled her gently, swaying gently. “I-it hurts….” “I know baby, I know it does. But you will heal honey.”
“When?” “I don’t know, but I will be here right by your side.” Ivy nods, and whimpers. Kelly rubbed Ivy’s back, “We are here.” Stella nods and hugged Ivy tightly. “We are here baby, I promise.” They looked at each other, ‘ How can we undo the damage that Esme splayed on Ivy?’ ‘We are in it together. As one, no matter what we will get through this together.’
Few months have passed,Ivy was started to settle, but something felt bitter. Her bruises started to fade, but the memories kept pushing. She never felt this type of love before. It was new. Stella always hugged her every morning. Esme never did that. It was foreign. She sneaked out of the house for school, then she saw Kelly. She frowned, “I.. um…” “What’s going on?” She hesitated, “N-nothing.” “I wish you told us you were leaving school early.” Ivy sighs, eying the room down the hall. “I just..class early that’s all.” He sighs, “Okay… stay safe.” She nods and left the apartment. Kelly glared at the door and walked down the hall. “Hey.” “Hey. Where is Ivy?” “Early class.” “Oh. ok.” She shrugged. “Have you noticed there is something off, she doesn’t seem present.” Stella cocked her head, “Uh… what do you mean?”
“It’s been 3 months since she lived with us.. And maybe the trauma still lingers, she struggles getting close to you Stella.” She felt her throat tightens looking at her husband in fear. “I will talk to her.” “I know you will.” Stella felt guilty. She knew this wasn’t going to be easy. Working long shifts, then see Ivy asleep when they got home or when they were, she thought Ivy was just tired. She sighs, not knowing what to say. Or how to act. She wanted to just hold Ivy and tell her everything will be ok. But the reality was… she just don’t know.
Ivy dropped her backpack near her room, “Stella?” She saw her foster mom in her room, “Y-you are home?” Ivy frowned, Stella sighs. “I am home.” She shrugged, “But why are you in my room?” “Can we talk?” “I guess.” Stella sighs, “What’s going on?” “N-nothing..” Stella sighs, “I just want to help.” “ But you can’t.”She cupped Ivy’s face, “I am not going to let you suffer alone.” She avoided her gaze. “It hurts…”
She mumbles. “What does?” “Everything! Nothing is ok!” She lashes out, seeing Stella’s eyes widened, “Nothing is okay anymore Stella!” Her eyes watered but she didn’t care. “I want to be close to you… I am scared. I am so freaking scared. This fear washes over me like I am nothing… one day Esme will come here and take me away from you.” She sobs. “Baby, come here. Come here.” She whispers. Ivy wiped her tears away, she nods, and cried sitting on Stella’s lap, she curled up and sighs. She sobs, “I want it to stop…” She hiccuped, feeling Stella cradling her head, “I know baby, I know you do. Esme is in jail, she won’t get out.” “I know. But my dreams… of her. Her coming from me…” She sniffles, letting her tears fall. “Sorry…” Stella’s own tears fell, she didn’t care Ivy’s tears dampened her shirt, she wanted to make sure she was okay and safe always. Nothing else mattered in this moment. Nothing. “It’s ok sweetheart. It’s ok to cry, always.” Ivy nods and hugging Stella, “Thank you for loving me, even when I don’t seem lovable.”
“You are loveable always Ivy. I promise that is the truth.” She nods hugging her cousin tightly, “I love you.” Stella’s heart clenched in sadness how small and broken her voice sounded, she needed to protect Ivy more than anything “And I love you more my baby.” She kissed her forehead and tears fell, but Stella didn’t care, she loved Ivy, and that was enough. Always.
Ivy tapped on her pencil and threw the paper away. She couldn’t focus. She hated she couldn’t. Tears burn over frustration. She saw Esme everywhere she went. It wasn’t fair. So unfair. Taunting her, the blood, her cries.
It wasn’t fair. She hated it. She walked out of the room, she felt anxious already. She saw Stella making dinner, she felt ashamed. She didn’t want to tell Stella she was already struggling. “Ivy?” “Um… hi.” “Hey… are you ok?” She nods. Stella knew. Ivy rubbed her arm, “I am fine, really.” Stella sat the kitchen towel down, cupping Ivy’s face gently, “Baby.. look at me.” Ivy look at her cousin’s face, she didn’t know what to say. How she could speak. She wanted to be safe, loved. “I… I still see her Stella.” “What?” “I… I know she is in jail, but… I see her everywhere I go. Laughing at me. Belittling me… hurting me. I don’t want to see her anymore Stella.” She trembled, burrowing herself in her cousin’s arms. Stella sighs, holding her cousin tightly, she knew Ivy was suffering, but didn’t know it was like this. Stella kissed her forehead, “I am here Ivy…” “I know, but…. I am scared. Losing you. I am so scared…” She whimpered, Stella sighs, cradling Ivy’s head, “Breathe… I am not going anywhere.”
Kelly came in seeing Stella holding Ivy tightly, he wanted to give them space. As they should. She nods, Ivy sighs, “You won’t leave me?” “Never.” Ivy nods, “I am sorry.” “Hey. Don’t apologize… you are safe ok.” “Ok.” They sat down on the couch, Ivy fell asleep on Stella’s chest, she smiled sadly, “You are safe sweetheart I promise” Kelly came in, “Is she sleeping?” Stella nodded. “I am scared Kelly. For her.” “I want her to be the person who she was… but I am afraid that Esme ruined her.” She cries. “And for what? For control? Manipulation?” Stella sighs, she held Ivy tightly, “I just want to hold her even tighter, and protect her.”
Kelly rubs Ivy’s back, “I know I do too. But we will get through it.” Stella nods, holding Kelly’s hand, “We have to. We just got to.” Stella smiles and kisses Ivy’s forehead, ‘My baby, you are safe. I got you. You are loved, and cherished, and I will earn your trust. Nobody will break you ever again.’
Ivy was always taught attachment is weakness. People will always leave you no matter what. Was it true? Ivy struggled emotionally, she focused on school. Even though Esme was in jail for what she did. It was hard. She put her headphones and put her hoodie on and just write, she couldn’t afford to be distracted, but she welcomed Stella’s hugs, it was soft and sweet.
Stella knew to give Ivy space, Kelly did too. But they were worried. How Ivy is coping. She snapped up, hearing car slams. She flinched, trembling, she gently sipped the cup of water in her room. She frowns, rubbing her arm up and down. ‘I am okay. I am safe.’ She thought. She was happy. Safe. “Ivy?” Stella knocked. “Are you ok?” “Y-yes ma’am.” She blushed, she didn’t know she called Stella ma’am, force of habit she reckons. “Um.. are you sure?” “Y-yes.” Ivy sighs, she curled up, crying. “I just wish I was normal.”
Stella saw Ivy staring at the tv, but not really enjoying it. “Ivy…” She saw Stella, “Hi…” “Are you ok?” She shook her head, “I…” “Fine.” She turned away. “Hey what’s going on?” “Nothing! I…” “Hey. You can talk to me I promise.”
She nods, “I don’t want to disappoint you.” Stella cupped Ivy’s face, “You could never disappoint me sweetheart.” She nods, sniffling in sadness. “Everything is just rushing back.” “What?” “The abandonment… it is just suffocating me.” She sighs. “It makes me anxious around you.” Stella’s heart clenched in sadness letting Ivy talk, she knew she struggled emotionally at times, she wanted to protect her, but she knew she couldn’t. She sighs, “I just didn’t want you leave me Stella, it terrifies me.” She said softly. Ivy whimpers, letting her tears fall. “Hey come here. Come here.” Ivy nods and crawled on Stella’s lap, “What if… you leave me one day?” She frowned, in sadness. “I couldn’t bare it Stella.” She whispers. “I will never leave you Ivy, I will always, always protect you always.”
Ivy burrowed her face against Stella, “I will never leave you Ivy, if you need a hug or need comfort I am here, and Kelly will be here for you too. We are a family Ivy.” Ivy smiles sadly, she held Stella tightly, whimpering, “I love you Stella.” Stella heard that, Ivy was shaking, and pecked a kiss on her forehead, “I love you so much baby. So much.” Stella squeezed Ivy’s hand, and rocked her gently.
Kelly sighs, and sat down next to them and rubbed Stella’s back, “She is going to be okay Stella, as long as she has us she will be ok.” “She is afraid of me leaving her.” Stella quivered her words, “I never thought she was afraid of me…” “Hey she is learning with us, and she will be safe.” “Yeah, she will.” Stella kissed Ivy’s forehead and let out a sad sigh.