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"I'm off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of the UK!” Jon hummed to himself as he walked down the brick road. He really needed help - nobody liked him, he wasn't a brave man, he didn't know what he was doing at his job, and he was lonely and sad. Self improvement was hard but he'd heard that the amazing Jared Hopworth could help. After all, nobody had ever been known to complain after using his services.
He knocked on the door and was greeted by a large man. “Hello, may I help you?"
“Um, yes. I'm here because I was told you could help me."
“Elaborate?"
Jon took in a breath. “I need a brain, a heart, courage, and a home."
Jared nodded and moved aside. “Come inside, I'll see what I can do."
Thirty minutes later Jon was lying on a table nervously looking up at the man peering down at him. "Are you sure this will work?”
"Let's see.” Jared pinned him down with one hand and reached into his chest with the other, breaking ribs like they were pretzel sticks. Then he yanked and Jon let out an agonized scream. "Yep, looks like you've already got a heart. See?” Jared held up the heart, still attached, where Jon could see it. Jared clicked his tongue, "looks like the courage has left the building though.” Jon whimpered and everything went black.
When Jon came to he couldn't feel anything and everything looked somewhat blurry and somehow framed by a blurry cornucopia shape. He tried to blink and couldn't, instead simply focusing on the man standing next to him and peering into his eyes. "And here's your new home, little brain: this jar.”
…
Martin walked into his office and saw something new on his desk - a gift bag containing a gallon sized mason jar with the cornucopia design on the side. “Hmm, did someone leave me some jelly?" He carefully took the jar out of the bag and saw it contained… a brain attached to two eyes via the optic nerves. Martin wrinkled his nose in disgust and prepared to throw it in the garbage can by his desk when he saw the label on the bag. Then his heart leapt and he ran out of the office to get the others, thrilled. “Part of Jon's back!"