Chapter Text
✨Secret✨ Support Group
January 22 2017
Hayden Pike has added JJ Boiziau to the chat
Cliff
welcome to the group chat, grab a case of beer, lol
JJ
I refuse to be in a group chat with a Boston player 😡
Hayden
Trust me, JJ, you need all the support you can find.
Cliff
i thought this chat was on hiatus
isn’t hollander dating rose landry…?
Carter
There is no WAY Hollander is still dating Landry.
You see that kiss on the ice? Plus they’ve been making 😍at each other aaaaaaaall weekend.
Hayden
Shane and Rose broke up a week or so ago, did I forget to tell you guys this?
🤷
He said it was mutual.
JJ
How do you all know about this?
Carter
They are not subtle, dude.
Cliff
they think they are but they’re not.
Scott
I plead the 5th
Hayden
No fifth amendment in Canada, baby! 🍁
Scott
I’m not in Canada 🦅
Cliff
so boiziau, how’d you find out
JJ
I went for a run and saw them holding hands on the beach.
Cliff
woah that’s public
Hayden
That’s not normal for them
JJ
Well, not holding hands… but their hands were touching?
What do they normally do?
Cliff
sneak out of hotels to sleep with each other and make goofy faces when they text
Hayden
Rozanov is Boston Lily.
Cliff
hollander is montreal jane
Hayden
They’re going to get caught for sure if they do stupid shit like holding hands on the beach.
JJ
I still have so many questions
How did you find out the Admirals knew about this?
And does anybody know how long this has been going on?
Carter
I was the one who created the chat, Boiziau. Don’t know how it took you guys so long to figure it out, considering y’all play on teams with them.
Scott
Actually I like this game, when did everybody figure it out? I’ll go last for dramatic effect.
JJ
I think I’ve already covered this.
Carter
Just before Sochi; Hollander chirped me the same thing Rozy had chirped me the week before. Too much of a coincidence.
Hayden
Shane had a fight with Boston Lily right before he started dating Rose, and then he started playing like shit against Boston.
He also got back to the hotel that day in clothes that were not the ones he was wearing when he left.
And I heard him crying in the shower, though he will probably die if he ever finds out about that.
I’m not great at maths but 2+2=4.
Cliff
rozanov plays better when we play montreal, except for since hollander started dating landry
also i overheard rozy flirt with hollander once on the ice and hollander blushed. they’re total dorks
Carter
Can confirm they’re back to normal. Fucking good thing, too, they played like magic today. East Coast baby woohoo!
Scott
I once overheard Rozanov give Hollander his room number at an ASW. I was in the room next door. The walls were… too thin.
Hayden
OMG. Piping hot ☕
I’ve been listening to Jacki gossip with her friends too much, haven’t I?
Cliff
hunter how can i contribute to your therapy costs?
JJ
Merde, which ASW?
Verbal seems risky. Why didn’t they just text each other?
Scott
…
I plead the 5th. 🤐
March 10 2017
JJ
@Cliff - what’s up with Rozanov not travelling to Nashville?
Cliff
none of your business
Hayden
Do you know? Because Shane’s doing that thing where he’s silently freaking out.
He’s also pretty sure Rozanov isn’t sick or hurt.
I am pretty sure they met up before the game yesterday.
That is weird for them in many ways, because it’s usually not before if it’s the day of a game, and it’s also usually not this close to the end of the season.
JJ
I didn’t need to know that.
I want to leave this chat.
Cliff
really did not need that image either, thank you pike
would explain why roz was in such a good mood before the game yesterday though
i think maybe something changed in tampa?
Hayden
Gross. That kind of shit is exactly what this support group is for, though.
Cliff
roz is a big boy, he can tell hollander himself if he wants.
Scott
Us knowing isn’t going to do anything, Boiziau. You going to tell Hollander that you talked to Marleau and you know why Rozanov isn’t with the team? I’m sure that’ll go down well.
Hayden
He’s got a point, Shane would freak out if he knew that we know.
March 11 2017
Hayden
I think he might have talked to Rozanov. He’s less worried today.
Cliff
huh
Hayden
That surprise you?
Cliff
little shit didn’t tell me he’d landed.
Hayden
Landed where?
Cliff
i plead the 5th.
🤐
April 7 2017
Hayden
I had no clue Rozanov’s dad had died
Cliff
yeah, it was none of your business
JJ
How’d he die?
Cliff
none of your business. even if it was i wouldn’t be able to tell you, he hasn’t told me.
Hayden
D’you reckon he told Shane?
Scott
Of course he’s told Hollander.
Cliff
whether he told hollander or not isn’t going to change the fact that we’re going to crush you today boys
Carter
OMG please tell me somebody heard what they were saying to each other before first drop
Scott
Condolences?
Carter
We’ve already established they’ve already spoken so I doubt it.
Holy shit that looked bad.
Scott
Gents, once you’ve finished punching each other, could you please let us know how he is?
Cliff
pike, any word on hollander yet?
Hayden
I’m not fucking talking to you.
Cliff
you think i took him out on purpose? fuck no.
i’m more worried about rozanov, he’s staring into an abyss.
i’d be less worried if he were beating me to a pulp right now.
roz is clearly worried about hollander.
Hayden
🖕
Scott
Stop being petty, Pike, you hashed it out on the ice. Give the man an update.
Hayden
Fine, he’s conscious.
Carter
Thank God. We’re sending only good vibes.
April 8 2017
Cliff
i just heard hollander’s out for the playoffs. sorry again.
Hayden
🖕
JJ
🖕
Carter
How’s Rozy taking it?
Cliff
not great but his mood has improved since he went to see him. glad he did. flight back to boston with roz like that would not have been fun for anybody.
Carter
I’ve got no clue what I’d do if that happened to Gloria. Do your best to let Rozy know we’re thinking of him without… you know…
Cliff
thanks vaughny.
May 14 2017
Hayden
Yo Marleau, I’d say sorry about losing to these fucks but that would be a lie.
Cliff
i’m fucking pissed
Carter
Was Rozy hurt? He looked like he was hurt.
Cliff
he didn’t say anything to me about it. though he doesn’t really say much of anything these days.
i’m starting to think he and hollander broke up.
again.
can they break up if they won’t admit they’re together?
JJ
Surely we’d know?
Hayden
Shane keeps denying Boston Lily actually exists so I don’t think he’d tell us if they broke up.
He’s also stuck with his parents in Ottawa while he recovers.
Cliff
well, it’s that time of the year again. talk to you all next season?
Carter
You’re not gonna come congratulate us when we win the cup? 😘
June 18 2017
Hayden
HUNTER YOU DOG
FUCKING POWER MOVE
JJ
You’re telling me that we’ve been discussing Shane and Rozanov this entire time and you’ve had a BOYFRIEND?????
Cliff
congrats on the boyfriend. and the impending media shitstorm bro, that took balls.
Carter
“Congrats on the cup, bro.”
Cliff
fuck you.
Scott
Thanks guys. His name is Kip. Can’t wait for you to meet him some time.
Carter
HEY MARLEAU AT LEAST YOU LOST TO THE TEAM THAT WON THE CUP
Carter
Also yes, Kip is adorable, we love him <3
June 29 2017
Carter
Ilya Rozanov is clubbing with us.
Cliff
yeah he likes to go to clubs
Carter
At a gay club in Vegas that is putting on a Scott Hunter night?
Cliff
…
if i didn’t already know…
Carter
Should I ask him?
Hayden
Absolutely not.
Scott
He’ll say no anyway.
Carter
How do you figure?
Scott
He’s Russian. The man could get arrested for being gay.
You’re the one that told me and Hollander that at Sochi.
He didn’t say anything about his sexuality to me. He just said that hopefully this makes it easier for “others”.
Cliff
he’s not gay though.
JJ
I thought we had established he is in love with Shane.
Cliff
you’ve clearly never seen the man work a dance floor.
JJ
I don’t get it.
Carter
Bisexuals exist, Boiziau.
July 11 2017
Hayden
MARLEAU, I AM GOING TO KILL YOUR CAPTAIN
Cliff
why? what did he do?
Hayden
Oh God I don’t even want to think about it.
Scott
Use your words, Pike.
JJ
Do we really want to know though? 🤔
Hayden
RIP Sweet perfect innocent baby Shane
Also RIP my mental health.
JJ
Is Shane dead????
Hayden
No, I just got off the phone to him.
JJ
Don’t fucking scare me like that man.
Carter
What has this got to do with Rozy?
Hayden
So Shane goes to his cottage-mansion every Summer. I haven’t spoken to him in a while on account of the fucking newborn who refuses to sleep, so I gave him a call.
Carter
Oh, congrats man, I must have missed that one in the news cycle.
Cliff
yeah, congrats to you and mrs pike
Hayden
Marleau, I’m pretty sure Rozanov is an absolute menace.
Cliff
does sound like him, yeah. what makes you so sure?
Hayden
All I’m going to say is that Shane puts too much trust in his mute button.
JJ
I definitely do not need to know about this.
Carter
Oh god.
Cliff
the worst part is i’m never going to be able to give him shit about this 🤣
Carter
I agree with Marleau, this is a tragedy.
Scott
I mean… are you sure about what you heard?
Hayden
I’ve been married for six years, I know what a blowjob sounds like, Hunter.
Carter
AAAAAHHHHH 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈