Chapter Text
Steve’s world was ending.
Reality crashing down around him.
They’d been arguing. More than that, more than the months of acidic barbs. Dustin had been throwing punches. They’d scrabbled around on the floor of the lab, the stench of the Upside Down cloying in his nostrils. They’d gone their separate ways, Steve declaring he was done even though it broke his heart to even think it.
His heart was truly shattered now as he fell to his knees.
They’d separated but then the building had shook and of course he’d ran to find Dustin. Apparently the world was ending – Steve didn’t care anymore if it did – exotic matter not a shield generator. But the building was collapsing around them. He’d been so worried about finding Nancy and Jonathan he’d almost fallen.
His knees buckled, kneecaps smashing against the floor, bile rising in his throat.
Dustin had stopped him falling. Had pulled him back, called him an asshole, begged him not to die. He’d been sobbing in his arms mere moments ago, arms tight around him, head pressed against his chest. But then the stairwell had creaked again. Dustin had shoved him hard. Hard enough he fell against the opposite wall.
Too far away.
Too far to stop it.
He vomited right there on the floor, head spinning, not caring that he was crawling through his own sick as he edged towards the opening in the ground.
He didn’t want to look.
Couldn’t look.
Had to look.
A broken howl left him, everything around him condensing down into pure agony as he screamed.
He’d known before he even looked, had known the moment Dustin’s eyes had widened, arms flailing as the floor beneath him gave way, face still wet with tears, Steve’s name on his lips as he fell.
But now Steve could see him, who knew how many floors below, body twisted at an unnatural angle, blood already pooling beneath his head. So much blood. God, so much blood.
His breath came in ragged pants as he pushed himself to his feet. Too fast, too shaky to draw in a decent amount of oxygen. His legs were shaking too as he put one foot in front of the other, leaning heavily against the wall. Tears blurred his vision but down he went anyway, down and down, no longer caring about Jonathan and Nancy. Not caring about anything but reaching Dustin.
He ignored the pain tearing through his chest. The voice that told him it was too late. Dustin needed him. He needed Dustin. God, he needed Dustin.
The moment he reached the ground floor a broken exhale left him. His knees almost gave out again but he staggered forwards, only collapsing when he reached Dustin’s side. It looked so much worse from here. Blood seeped into his pants, still warm, soaking his knees. Steve reached out a hand, fingers trembling, he touched Dustin’s cheek, gently turning his face towards him. Dustin’s eyes were closed but his head lolled unnaturally when Steve moved it.
A sob tore free as he cupped Dustin’s cheek.
“Dustin.”
His name came out as a sob. A broken thing. Wrong and unnatural too.
“D-dustin please,” Steve begged, tears beginning to fall thick and fast. “Please w-wake up. St-stop being an asshole. Just wake up. I need you. Dust—” His voice finally broke, dissolving fully into heart wrenching sobs.
~
Nancy’s gasp sounded like a gunshot in the heavy silence. Steve’s arms tightened around Dustin’s body. His skin was still warm, body still pliable when Steve had pulled him into his lap, stroking his hair, cupping his face. But Nancy could tell, it was obvious, no matter how carefully Steve had moved him, how gently he’d arranged his limbs. It was clear Dustin was broken. Blood coating the floor, Steve was covered in it too, freezing him to the core where it’d seeped into his clothes. But still he hadn’t moved. Couldn’t. Couldn’t bear the thought of it even once his voice had gone hoarse from crying and his tears had run dry. Leaving him with nothing but the heartbreak of having watched someone he loved die.
It was the worst kind of irony that now he understood how Dustin had felt all these months. How broken he must have been having watched Eddie die. Steve didn’t know how he’d carried on. Because right now he wished he’d jumped straight after him. He didn’t give a shit about Vecna. About saving the world. The only thing that registered was that Dustin was gone.
“Oh god, Dustin.”
Nancy’s voice trembled but Steve didn’t look up. Didn’t do anything. Hand resting over his too still chest, where his heart should be beating. Eyes tracing over his face. The light dusting of freckles on his forehead, the slope of his nose, the curve of his jaw. All the things Steve had taken for granted. Had never known he’d miss until they were torn away.
“What happened?” Jonathan asked weakly.
“Floor collapsed,” Steve managed to croak out. Throat sore. Mind numb.
“It’s my fault,” Nancy said with a sob, “I-I shot that... that shield—”
“Exotic matter,” Steve cut in, like it was important, like it changed the fact Dustin was lying dead in his arms.
“What?” she asked tearily, probably wrapped in Jonathan’s arm. Steve didn’t care. Still didn’t take his eyes off Dustin.
“It’s exotic matter not a shield generator. There was research. Brenner’s.” The words came out mechanically. Important because Dustin had said them but utterly useless now.
“Exotic matter... like... like wormholes?” Nancy asked slowly, always smarter than Steve, able to put the physics of it all together. “Like Back to the Future?”
His eyes snapped up for the first time. Now that he understood. He’d watched that movie multiple times. It was one of his and Robin’s go to favourites.
“Time travel,” he breathed out, latching onto the idea with a hope he didn’t know he still possessed.
He moved slowly, shifting Dustin carefully. Hand brushing his cheek one more time. He got to his knees slowly, pausing to bend down, the blood on the ground was cold, sticky on his hands as he leant over and pressed his lips to Dustin’s forehead. His eyes squeezed shut as he lingered there, heart still shattered, world still broken, but with that tiniest sliver of hope.
Steve got unsteadily to his feet, ignoring the looks of horror on Nancy and Jonathan’s faces. Up. He needed to go up. Him and Dustin had seen it earlier, a great big red ball, crackling and shifting like it was alive.
“Steve!” Nancy had rushed forwards, a hand gripping his arm. “Where are you going?”
“Up,” he said simply, “is it on the roof?” He didn’t wait for a reply, just pulled himself from her grasp and carried on. Legs still shaky but somehow keeping him upright, as if they knew this was his only option. His one shot.
“Steve, seriously, what are you doing?” Nancy latched hold of him again barely three steps later, spinning him to face her. “It’s not safe. Look at what’s already happened,” her voice cracked, “Dustin’s—”
“I know!” he shouted, anger exploding from him, making her take a trembling step back. “You think I don’t know that? This is the only way. The only chance.”
“The only chance to what? You go near that stuff you’ll get yourself killed! Do you think that’s what Dustin would want?”
Nancy’s words pierced the tattered remains of his heart. Steve’s face contorted into an angry sneer. “Don’t,” he spat viciously. “I don’t plan on killing myself.”
Though at this point he couldn’t say he really cared if that was the outcome. Because if he failed, was there really any point in carrying on?
“What do you plan on then?” Jonathan asked, eyes locking on Steve’s.
Steve took a breath. The plan. Barely a plan. The vaguest hint of an idea washing over him. Exotic matter. Wormholes. Time travel.
“I’m gonna save him.”