Ceilingtiddie69



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    North Shore High has rules. Regina George wrote most of them.

    Rule #14: Never date a guy who can’t spell “responsibility.”
    Rule #15: Never, ever fall for a drummer.

    But after another fight with her ex, Regina needs a boyfriend — fast. And the only guy bold (and dumb) enough to pull it off is Rodrick Heffley. He's the new kid, the wannabe rockstar, and the walking violation of everything she stands for.

    It’s supposed to be fake. A distraction. A statement.

    Until it isn’t.

    Fake dating or falling for the loser you were supposed to be using. It's basically same thing, right?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,070
    Chapters:
    11/?
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    3
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    21 Oct 2025

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    “We’re building a homeless shelter,” Technoblade blurts.

    That’s not-- what?

    “What?” Wilbur echoes his thoughts. That-- he doesn’t understand.

    Technoblade repeats it. “We’re building a homeless shelter. It won’t be ready for a few days, but this time next week I guarantee it’ll be up and running.”

    Wilbur shakes his head. This doesn’t make sense. It must be a trap, a way to gather them all in one building to make it easier to take them all.

    “I promise,” Technoblade insists, “It’ll be done by then. It’ll have blankets, food, good food, a warm space, even rooms eventually.” He takes a step forward, and Wilbur staggers back. He keeps Tommy cradled against his body.

    This can’t be real. It’s a trap. Technoblade is lying.

    -------

    Or, Wilbur has five kids (some of whom are magic), trust issues, fiercely loyal friends and a knife against a kingdom actively trying to conscript him or kill him by any means necessary.

    It's a good thing the Antarctic Empire is looking to expand its borders.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    76,759
    Chapters:
    15/15
    Collections:
    21
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    1,446
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    04 Feb 2022

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    This house, so big and expensive, was never supposed to take someone like him in- a house like this is meant for the nice children with good records and perfectly pleasant attitudes towards absolutely everything, even dog shit. It wasn't in the request forms that Phil had filled out, but it was just how foster kids were grouped sometimes; the good kids get the good houses, and kids like Tommy weren't even allowed in the neighborhood's vicinity. Him ending up here was never supposed to happen; there’d been some misplaced paperwork, and Tommy had ended up on Phil’s doorstep with a bad attitude and thunder in his expression, fully expecting to be sent away the second the man caught a look at the bruise on his jaw and the rage on his face. But he only opened the door further and told Tommy that they'd get it all sorted out in a few days. He'd naturally assumed that 'sorted out' meant sending him back, and had never fully unpacked in the days that he'd stayed; he mainly kept to his room, in the interest of not pissing off the nice man who hadn't left him outside like a lot of others had done. Tommy was never meant to stay.

    Or: Tommy will throw down at any time for any reason and everyone knows it.

    Language:
    English
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    6,009
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    234
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    26 Sep 2021

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    -like you.

    Tommy didn't want to get attached, but he did, and now he's paying for it. By throwing up flowers. Spectacular.

    or

    Platonic hanahaki werewolf foster care au (I really just shoved those aus in there, didn't I).

    (INSPIRED BY DIASPORAS BLUE BY SILVERWING15, WHICH IS GOD TIER)

    Language:
    English
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    19,952
    Chapters:
    8/8
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    11 Sep 2021

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    Tommy's a fuck up, he can't pay attention, and never sits still. He taps his hands, pushes people away, and has never had a best friend. He's a screwed up, forgotten kid lost in the foster system. He's also just been placed with a new family. Tommy knows how this goes, he never ends up staying long. After all, no one wants a fuck up like him.

    Why would this house be any different?

    -

    Or: the obligatory sbi foster au, but with a focus on the neurodivergent kids that inevitably get lost in the system.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    49,689
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    3,323
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    15,255
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    274,028

    17 Aug 2021