bitchasstozier



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Prince Edward, is due to marry Princess Myra in order to help secure his kingdom financially. In a last ditch effort to be free and fulfil a lifelong dream of travelling the world, he sneaks out of his window and on board a pirate ship. Captain Richie Tozier’s pirate ship.

    or Prince Eddie & Pirate Richie AU

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,741
    Chapters:
    26/26
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    17 Jul 2019

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “What?” Eddie asks, narrowing his eyes as Bill takes his glasses off the table and slides them back on. “What’s that look? Why are you making that face?”

    Shrugging, Bill pulls his manuscript in front of him, flipping through the first few pages. “It’s nothing. Just, y-you know. You two.”

    “Who?”

    “You and Richie.”

    Eddie bristles. “What about us?”

    “You’re p-practically m-married.”

    His immediate reaction is to roll his eyes and protest; it’s not the first time he’s heard this. Morons have been suggesting they date each other since high school. Middle school, maybe. “It’s not like that,” he says, snagging his pen from Bill’s grasp and clipping the cap back on. “That’s weird.”

    / / / /

    -Or the one where Eddie Kaspbrak is thirty-six years old and his dick doesn’t work anymore.-

    Language:
    English
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    26,868
    Chapters:
    4/?
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    529
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    104
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    10 Sep 2018

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    These are the facts: Richie Tozier talks a lot.

    Richie Tozier wears coke-bottle glasses, and his two front teeth are kind of fucked up.

    Richie Tozier can start fires with his mind.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,163
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    38
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    1,008
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    163
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    06 Sep 2018

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    But Richie is not altogether that patient, so he says, “Have phone sex with me.” It almost sounds like a whine. In his defense, it’s been four days. He’s kind of keyed up.

    “No,” Eddie says immediately, and he huffs a laugh, like he thinks Richie is joking. “You’re so annoying.”

    Language:
    English
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    2,828
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    1/1
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    06 Sep 2018

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Richie and Eddie had become friends almost on sight. Since they met, most of Eddie's time in Los Angeles has involved Richie in some way.

    It's a little different, now that they're both famous.

    It's a little different, now that they're sleeping together.

    Well, to be fair, they've been sleeping together for a long time, but. No one knows, not even their friends. Eddie has been very careful about that. It's just not the sort of publicity he needs.

    So when Beverly calls him that sunny Thursday morning, the last thing he expects her to say is, "You're fucking Richie?"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,856
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    41,200

    06 Sep 2018