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    “Buck, seriously.” Eddie catches his eye, staring intently, attempting to beam the anxiety straight into Buck’s brain. “I know we’re both playing it cool, but… How are you not freaking out right now? I’m freaking out right now.” 

    Buck quirks an eyebrow. “I thought you didn’t panic.” 

    “I don’t,” Eddie insists. “But I woke up in the wrong body this morning, and I had to—” He lowers his voice, ducking closer to Buck. “I touched your dick, man. Which—you know.” 

    A violation of boundaries. A line that can’t be uncrossed. Something Eddie feels deeply guilty about.

    “You touched my dick?” Buck asks, approximately one billion decibels louder than necessary. 

    The room around them stills.

    Or: Buck and Eddie switch bodies. Chaos ensues. 

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    07 Apr 2026

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    Hen sighs. “Something had to be said before you idiots put us in mortal peril.”

    “I’d never do anything to jeopardize our safety on a job! You know that Hen.”

    “Maybe not on purpose,” Chim chimes in, “but, see, the thing is, when you flirt with our Buck, his brain turns off. He just bluescreens.”

    “You’re flustering the poor boy, Eddie,” Hen adds. “And it’s making him dumb.”

    “-er,” Chim adds.

    “Wha- Buck isn’t flustered.”

    Eddie is flustered. His face feels hot. He takes another sip of his coffee to give his hands something do to, but that only makes him feel warmer. Shit.

    Hen levels him with the most deadpan look. “Last week he walked into a stop sign after you called him ‘big boy’ on a call.”

    Eddie nearly spits out his coffee.

     

    Or: the one where Eddie subconsciously flirts with Buck without realizing and Buck is actively trying not to have a heart attack at work about it

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    07 Apr 2026

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    Emmy: When did you first hook up with him?
    Jane: 2010
    Caro: WHAT
    Megan: GIRL
    Tia: SEVEN YEARS??
    Megan: My jaw is borderline unhinged rn

    Or: In 2017, Shane finds a place where he can talk about his sex life...a group chat for girls who have slept with Ilya Rozanov

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    06 Apr 2026

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    Shandry's Third @shaneybaby

    uhhh so im on r/shanehollander rn and some guy is claiming to have cloned shane’s dad’s phone and uploaded it to the internet?? has anyone else clicked on this link will it give me a virus if i do

    7:03 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 135.1k retweets | 232.1k likes

    Shandry's Third @shaneybaby

    okay I googled his dad and he’s a 52 year old forensic accountant who thinks fashion peaked with ralph lauren polo shirts. am I enough of a hollander simp to risk my laptop just to look through the phone of his dad who acts like sandals and bermuda shorts are a risqué choice. yes.

    7:04 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 137.1k retweets | 235.9k likes

    Shandry's Third @shaneybaby

    oh my god his password for everything is ShaneHollander24. pov you love your son so much that it compromises your bank account

    7:04 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 143.7k retweets | 250.7k likes

    Shandry's Third @shaneybaby

    HOLY FUCK

    7:19 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 337.1k retweets | 413.3k likes

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    31 Mar 2026

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    The idea of another man, specifically an older man, taking Dennis out makes something inside him burn hot and hard. It makes him see red for a few moments, jaw clenched and aching at the pressure. He breathes in slowly before letting it out and going to check on the patient in trauma one. He can’t be acting like this, he’s a grown adult.

    Or: Robby decides to try to sabotage Dennis’ date with an older man.

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    30 Mar 2026

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