melancholy_was



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  1. Public Bookmark 14

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    Summary

    If I ever see Burt again, this time, I’m going to kiss him.

    And there he is.

    “Good morning,” Irv murmurs, his hand finding the center of Burt’s back.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,521
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    134
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1,395

    01 May 2025

  2. Public Bookmark 34

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    “You… like it?” Irving asks, vulnerable, pitched halfway between a statement and a question.

    And Burt thought he was a stranger.

    “Of course, I like it,” Burt replies, automatic, honest. “I love it, it’s— It’s me!”

    This time, there’s a touch of a laugh in Irving’s voice when he repeats, “Yes, it— it is. I suppose it is.”

    or: in another life, burt, a newly-retired former curator, finally talks to irving, the artist he's noticed in his art museum (and crushed on) for years.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,543
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    160
    Kudos:
    236
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    4,338

    01 May 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Look - I don’t usually do this, but I am the food critic for The Anchor, and it’s imperative that I -”
    “Oh, a food critic! Well that changes things.”
    “Does it?”
    “Sure. What was that name again?”
    “Stede Bonnet. Food Critic, Stede Bonnet.”
    “Right. Well, fuck off, Food Critic Stede Bonnet. Blackbeard’s Bar and Grill is all booked up.”

    The manager at the new restaurant Stede is trying to review is being kind of a dick. A certain member of the waitstaff, however, takes a bit of a liking to him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,529
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    653
    Kudos:
    10,467
    Bookmarks:
    1,721
    Hits:
    51,599

    09 Feb 2024

  4. Public Bookmark 4

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    "You okay, mate?"

    "Hm? Oh, yes, I'm quite all right. Izzy just blew his load."

    Ed makes the mistake of taking a swig just as Stede answers, and promptly inhales a mouthful of wine. As he coughs, Stede tsks sympathetically and gives his back a few thumps. When Ed can breathe again, he manages a strangled "Sorry? Izzy did what?"

    "Blew his load,” Stede replies, matter-of-factly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    351

    16 Jan 2024

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Stede leaves his wife over a sexy calendar model, then finds himself in the presence of the man himself after a series of unfortunate fiery events.

    Firefighter Edward Teach keeps getting called out to a handsome middle-aged bachelor's apartment to respond to kitchen fires.

    Will their unlikely connection spark an inferno? 🔥

    Now with a podfic by LoopyDangerFrog!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,787
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    221
    Kudos:
    1,216
    Bookmarks:
    234
    Hits:
    7,682

    30 Dec 2023