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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Adopting a secret cat in a no-pets-allowed apartment building is one thing. Kissing the new property manager after he discovers your secret cat is another.

    Learning the property manager thought he was straight until you kissed him and accidentally sent him into a tailspin—well, it's a weird twenty-four hours for Ed Teach.

    So: friends. Friends, he can do. Friends, that's easy. Except there are mochas, and there are movies, and there's this whole queer discovery he's helping Stede navigate, and there are a hell of a lot of chocolate muffins.

    Sometimes the journey is the most important part.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    272,637
    Chapters:
    36/36
    Comments:
    2,054
    Kudos:
    1,082
    Bookmarks:
    174
    Hits:
    55,128

    11 Dec 2025

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  2. Public Bookmark 41

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    He ducks under the ridge of the skull, unclips his bow, slips an arrow into the housing, and creeps around until he has a decent view of the trail. The stranger has slowed, staring up at the leviathan as they approach, hands on their hips. Ed steps out into view, raises his bow, and pauses.

     

    The stranger, as unknown as he currently is, is cute.

     

    Hylian, most likely. A little shorter than Ed, but broad looking under his tunic and cloak, pack sticking up over the top of his head, and visibly stuffed with god-knows-what. There’s a physical map sticking out from one of his pockets, and leaves in his hair, and he’s clearly not been gifted with powers of observance, because Ed’s been aiming a bow at him for the best part of two minutes, and he still hasn’t noticed.

     

    And then, all at once, his gaze drops, and his eyes widen, and he all but screams.

     

    “I’M FRIENDLY!”

     

     

    or: what if Ed and Stede just happened to be citizens in the Kingdom of Hyrule? And what if they had a serendipitous meet cute at the Great Eldin Skeleton and then fell in love? Suspend your disbelief, because this is that fic.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,734
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    44
    Kudos:
    138
    Bookmarks:
    41
    Hits:
    1,825

    25 Oct 2025

  3. Public Bookmark 47

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    Summary

    When they first meet, Stede Bonnet, cravat influencer, finds Edward Teach, the new Earl of Blackthorn, to be an ill-mannered boor. Drawn to the man in spite of himself, Stede finds himself agreeing to help Blackthorn make over his wardrobe.

    ~~~~~

    A Regency AU

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,215
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    384
    Kudos:
    248
    Bookmarks:
    47
    Hits:
    4,560

    23 Oct 2025

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  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Stede Bonnet became a pirate because he was looking for purpose, and he's found it: in the devotion of his life to making Edward Teach happy.

    Which very much includes finding new ways to pleasure him.

    AKA: Stede asks to eat Ed's ass for the first time.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,060
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    133
    Kudos:
    1,754
    Bookmarks:
    395
    Hits:
    12,955

    19 May 2025

  5. Public Bookmark 42

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    Summary

    Stede gave him a fond smirk. “Gosh, I forget how sweet you are when you’re feeling a bit jealous.”

    Ed rolled his eyes. Infuriatingly, his face felt very warm, like he was blushing or something stupid like that. “Not jealous,” he muttered.

    “Of course not,” Stede told him very seriously. “Why would you be?” He reached out and gently extricated one of Ed’s hands where his arms were crossed. Gave it a little squeeze.

    Still, Ed couldn’t drop it. “There’s something funny in the way he looks at you.”

    Stede just smiled serenely. “Is there? I wouldn’t notice, would I? Not with you around, looking so captivating in that shirt.”

    Ed glared at him, but he was feeling very wriggly and pleased. “Yeah?”

    *

    Some highly valuable stolen loot leads to a surprise encounter with one of Stede's childhood friends—the suspiciously kind and handsome Charlie Badminton. At first, Ed is jealous, but soon he and Charlie begin to bond. Naturally, Stede is super normal about this.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,862
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    316
    Kudos:
    263
    Bookmarks:
    42
    Hits:
    4,164

    18 Apr 2025

  6. Public Bookmark 30

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    Summary

    “Who’s that?” Ed points to the unfamiliar player. He has yellow hair, almost gingery, styled in waves that evoke the old movies Ed’s mum used to watch on their black and white television. The man twirls around, and Ed sees his jersey has the name “Bonnet” printed on the back.

     

    A rugby AU where Ed and Stede learn how to be brave after forty-plus years of playing it safe.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    53,808
    Chapters:
    6/8
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    208
    Kudos:
    88
    Bookmarks:
    30
    Hits:
    2,654

    28 Feb 2025

  7. Public Bookmark 43

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    Summary

    This is Stede’s happily ever after. He doesn’t have a doubt in his mind.

    He can’t bear the thought that Ed does.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,506
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    334
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    2,041

    15 Jan 2025

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Stede Bonnet owns a fancy yarn shop in a cosy little seaside town. Life is mostly peaceful, a bit stressful, often lonely—then the empty shop next door is taken over by a leatherworker with kind eyes and a surprising fondness for cashmere, and everything changes.

    (Fluff and sock garters and seashore walks and midlife revelations and a loophole in The Sweater Curse.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,148
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    868
    Kudos:
    1,606
    Bookmarks:
    374
    Hits:
    24,203

    18 Nov 2024

  9. Public Bookmark 62

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    Summary

    DAY 12: Feminization || Voyeurism || "Look at the mess you made."

     

    Collab with @rysi000u!

     

    Ed's got a third date with a guy he likes at a fancy restaurant, and it's finally a chance for him to wear the special occasion dress he's had in his closet for ages.

    There's just one problem: the damn zipper is stuck. Maybe his next door neighbour can help him out.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,050
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    94
    Kudos:
    421
    Bookmarks:
    62
    Hits:
    3,445

    18 Nov 2024

  10. Public Bookmark 15

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    Summary

    Ed has a new understudy. An incredibly hot, fascinating understudy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,699
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    66
    Kudos:
    120
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1,009

    14 Nov 2024

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ed’s used to visitors, though the novelty of his home has worn off in the last eighteen months or so, the uninvited guests becoming fewer and further between. He’s used to curiosity, and questions he rarely feels like answering. He’s used to people forgetting that this is, in fact, his home, and not some out of the way tourist attraction.

    He’s used to strangers.

    But he’s starting to think that perhaps, not all his visitors need to stay strangers.

     

    or: Ed has a simple life. He has a self-built, off grid, mostly self-sustaining house tucked away in the middle of a forest. He has five chickens, and a partially feral cat. He lives alone, and he likes it that way. Until the appearance of an incredibly nosy, incredibly handsome stranger three weekends in a row has him questioning every self-imposed rule he's ever set himself.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,476
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    573
    Kudos:
    1,159
    Bookmarks:
    321
    Hits:
    18,276

    10 Nov 2024

  12. Public Bookmark 62

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    Summary

    Alpha Ed Teach meets omega Stede Bonnet over a business proposal. He doesn't expect the power to go out all over the city and them to be trapped together in a small apartment, but suppressants linger in the body for long enough it shouldn't be a problem before the power comes back on.

    The problem is that "shouldn't" isn't the same as "won't."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,779
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    220
    Kudos:
    403
    Bookmarks:
    62
    Hits:
    5,765

    10 Nov 2024

  13. Public Bookmark 68

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    Summary

    Was there a plan here? Did Stede think he never wanted to fuck again? Because Ed definitely wanted to fuck again. Like, a lot.

    And now they were here, at the inn, alone. The Revenge had sailed off into a buttery marmalade sunset with the whole crew, so it was just the two of them (and assorted small animals in varying stages of decomposition) in their perfect, partially collapsed new home.

    Ed was trying very hard not to think of it as a wedding night.

    Especially since it wasn’t one.

    Like, at all. They were not married. Not even close! And Stede knew pirate marriages existed—between all mix of genders. They’d just been to one. So if he wanted to be gay pirate married to Ed, he’d have said something.

    **

    It's Ed and Stede's first night at the inn together, and as usual Ed is feeling super normal about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,772
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    86
    Kudos:
    326
    Bookmarks:
    68
    Hits:
    2,549

    07 Nov 2024

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  14. Public Bookmark 56

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    Summary

    “Do you think it’s some kind of sex pollen?” Stede asked, out of breath once again as he rolled off Ed to stretch out along his side. “I read about that in a rather filthy book once. Didn’t think it was real, but then there’s so much we don’t know about the world!”
    Ed, for his part, was lying on his back; body melting into the puddle of their commingled juices currently pooling beneath him on the bed.
    “Nah mate,” he scoffed, voice rough like he’d been screaming (he had). “Sex pollen wishes. Reckon we’re just madly in love.”

    **

    Ed and Stede retire from piracy and attempt to open an inn. Or they would, if they could stop fucking for long enough to get the place into shape.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,912
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    348
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    2,307

    07 Nov 2024

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  15. Public Bookmark 9

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    Summary

    Stede convinces Ed to act out the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet. They end up getting rowdy about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,992
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    135
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    890

    18 Sep 2024

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  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Seeking calm and new connections, bumbling baby gay Stede books himself and dear friend Ed into a meditation workshop.

    Unbeknownst to him, the mindfulness class is based on sexual healing through tantric stroking.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,371
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    123
    Kudos:
    767
    Bookmarks:
    123
    Hits:
    4,267

    16 Sep 2024

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  17. Public Bookmark 12

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    Summary

    A man stood before the printer.

    No, that wasn’t right. “Man” served to define the heavy mouthbreathers pounding it out at the hotel gym. This was no mere man.

    Unholy was the next word that flitted through his addled mind.

    But that wasn’t right, either. There was nothing unholy or holy about the vision before him.

    Dreamlike fit better. His colours did not match Stede’s dream at all, given that he was swathed in leather and that his hair was a cloud of silver and sable curls. Yet, even at first glance, even though Stede had only clocked his profile, he knew that every aspect of the sight before him matched his waking dreams.

    He’d never mentioned leather and long hair to anyone, not even Lucius, his assistant at the bookshop he’d opened following his father’s death, his divorce, and his slow awakenings. Lucius came closest to a best friend, and even he had no idea that, a few months ago, Stede had discovered an author called Blackbeard, taken one glimpse of the photo on the book jacket, and fallen head over heels in—

    Love.

    And now Blackbeard was here. Standing before him. Looking at the lingerie photos Stede had printed.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,595
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    78
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    896

    16 Sep 2024

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Stede Bonnet is on a mission - prove himself useful and avoid getting fired and cut off from his family wealth. All he has to do is convince a crew employed by his father’s company that their woodland construction site is not being terrorised by a supernatural entity.

    What could possibly go wrong? It’s not like Stede believes in ghosts or demons or curses, so he has nothing to fear.

    However, seeing is believing, just as they say. As it turns out, there's merit to the crew's panicked reports, and Stede is about to learn that fear will be the last thing on his mind when he discovers the nature of what's really lurking in the woods.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    130,408
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    362
    Kudos:
    410
    Bookmarks:
    101
    Hits:
    10,707

    08 Aug 2024

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  19. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Stede draws his attention back to the head massage, alternating pressure from the kind of bruising that’s enough to knead a migraine away, to gentle, delicate strokes through his hair. He grows almost meditative with it, forcing his eyes away from Ed’s face and simply enjoying the feeling of body heat and cool, damp-silk hair against his palms. Truthfully, he could do this for hours, rather than the usual three-to-five minutes that’s usually afforded to customers when they…

    When…

    It’s been longer than three-to-five minutes.

    A quick glance at the clock reveals it’s been far, far longer than three-to-five minutes.

    Stede doesn’t mind, obviously. And Ed doesn’t seem to be about to question it. But the snide little Lucius-like voice in the back of his mind points out that almost twenty fucking minutes is maybe a bit of an overkill.

    Stede yanks his hands away from Ed’s hair like it’s covered in bleach.

    “Okey-doke!” Stede manages, voice shrill and a little strangled.

    From across the salon, the real Lucius snorts.

    (OR: Stede's a hair stylist. Ed shows up for an appointment. And shows up. And shows up. And shows up...)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    106,257
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    2,170
    Kudos:
    1,165
    Bookmarks:
    349
    Hits:
    22,603

    27 Jul 2024

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  20. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    In the long-ago year 2000, bouncy blonde boy-band member Stede Bonnet is 17-year-old Edward Teach's gay awakening.

    Decades later, Ed hears a voice he could never forget.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    51,087
    Chapters:
    24/24
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    770
    Kudos:
    989
    Bookmarks:
    208
    Hits:
    19,645

    25 Jul 2024

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