torpidTelegnosis
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- Homestuck (7)
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Five minutes is all Dave needs to ruin everybody's lives, apparently, especially his own. An accident in the labs begins the long and painful process of transforming into a troll, and though trolls may look remarkably similar to humans for creatures that evolved on different planets in different universes, they aren't the same at all. The transformation is debilitating, and he is forced to trust Karkat to take care of him and even keep him alive as his very insides shift within him.
Rose, meanwhile, begins work on some sort of solution -- after all, Seer of Light may as well mean Knower of Knowledge, right? She should know this. But her experience with breaking the rules is of little help when there are none to begin with, and she can hardly play with fire when it's not herself at risk of burns but her newly-discovered brother.
As time wears on with no solution, the meteor crew can't help but wonder: are they doomed? Or is there redemption for their timeline yet?
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When Jake receives a handful of messages from Dirk at an odd time, he doesn't think much of it. But when the conversation ends abruptly and is followed by complete radio silence from both Dirk and the Auto Responder for days on end, he begins to worry.
He later discovers that his worry was well-founded.
(Man could this description be cheesier. Whatever.)
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In the brief moment between Dave solidifying his expression and your heroic death, you can’t help but wonder if this isn’t some sort of karmic revenge.
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It's not until the fight is over that you see him.
I saw a really sad picture of Dave carrying Karkat's body and I wrote this short little thing and it's 4 am and I'm posting it for some reason.
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The three of you are lined up very neatly, you suddenly notice. One clean slice and it’s over.
One clean slice.
You harden your face and stare at Dave. You see the moment of confusion, the moment of understanding, the moment of horror, and finally the moment he resigns himself to the task and lifts his sword.
He flies towards you, and you fleetingly have a thought you’ve never had before.
Please let the katana break.
Can be read independently from Unite. Contains spoilers if you're not caught up.
Series
- Part 2 of Head or Heart
Recent series
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- Words:
- 2,294
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 7
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“Actually, uh—“ Shane scratched the back of his neck and dropped his gaze to the floor by Ilya’s chair. “Would you mind if I sucked you off?”
“Would I mind?” Ilya asked. “No, I would not mind. You want my cock again that badly, Hollander?”
Series
- Part 3 of missing scenes
Bookmarked by torpidTelegnosis
23 Mar 2026
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Apogee by OpalApparition
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
09 Mar 2026
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Shane Hollander is the youngest Commander in ISS history; straight-backed, closeted, and so tightly on his own leash that seven months in orbit with Ilya Rozanov have not produced a single crack in his composure.
Ilya Rozanov is the Russian cosmonaut who should have had his job, won’t stop bouncing a tennis ball off the walls, and is still looking for a fissure. Thankfully, a solar storm finds it for him.
or: Near-death, zero gravity, and the wrong man’s hands in exactly the right places.
A Cosmonaut!Ilya x Astronaut!Shane AU 🚀
- Language:
- English
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- 50,348
- Chapters:
- 3/3
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- 2
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- 2,103
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Bookmarked by torpidTelegnosis
21 Mar 2026
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Russians do not blush. Russians do not get sick. Ilya gets concussions. He gets stitches. He skates on cracked ribs and calls it fine. He does not get sick. Which is why, when he wakes up at three in the morning in the middle of June, shaking so hard his teeth knock together, his first instinct is irritation.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,373
- Chapters:
- 16/16
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- 1,383
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- 7,725
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Bookmarked by torpidTelegnosis
21 Mar 2026
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On the bedside table is a framed picture of Shane and Rose. Hugging, noses touching.
“What is this?” Ilya asks, grip tightening on the back of Shane’s neck. It’s not in character. He needs to know that this is not what he thinks it is, or Shane will not leave this room in one piece.
Shane whimpers, long and pitiful. His hands clench into the bedsheets, once, twice. Bracing. Then:
“My wife,” he whispers.
Or: Fix-It for Ilya’s Rose Landry related pain, but its a perverted sex freak role play with a twist that Shane cooks up in his pretty little head.
Series
- Part 2 of quantum mechanics
Bookmarked by torpidTelegnosis
20 Mar 2026
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sandcastles (all the pleasure, none of the burden) by prettyshadow (theaujasmin)
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)
21 Feb 2026
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“H’rder,” Shane whines into his mouth, not even trying to interrupt the kiss but speaking pathetically muffled and slurred around Ilya’s tongue.
Ilya knocks their foreheads together, smiles.
“Nooooo Ilya, not before the game, Ilya,” he whines, a sweetly mocking imitation of Shane, “and now look at you, mhm? Why should I ever listen to your complaining, baby, when you’re gonna be such an easy, perfect slut for it anyways?”
Or: Shane plays four-dimensional chess to get Ilya to fuck him even when he tells him no, for Shane-typical control freak reasons, in Shane-typical convoluted ways, with Shane-typical unawareness of this being a sex freak thing. Ilya provides, of course.
Series
- Part 1 of quantum mechanics