Archive of Our Own ^beta

Bakugou stares at the wooden table as the voices in the room continuously begin to rise. More and more of the previous class 3-A begin to appear, leading Bakugou to want to bang his head onto the table until he doesn’t hear the voices anymore.

“Kirishima! Bakugou!” Kaminari’s voice yells across the commotion as he enters the room.

Bakugou doesn’t look up, still lost in thought as he stares at the table.

He doesn’t want to be here. It was their ten-year class reunion and Kirishima made him go. Bakugou was doing just fine so he doesn’t see why Shitty Hair would be obsessed with his attendance.

Bakugou’s on top of the world right now. Number one hero. The Symbol of Victory. Dynamight made his appearance during high school and he’s been on the top ever since. Why would he want to come to some shitty reunion?

Kirishima had told him as he forcefully entered Bakugou’s apartment that Bakugou had to go. That Bakugou hasn’t really seen his friends since he became number one and that they miss him. That he buries himself in his work in an unhealthy way and he needs to relax.

Working is the only thing that makes Bakugou relax. Working is the only thing that makes him forget. Or remember. Remember why he’s still here.

A thump on his back brings him to the present where he has to gather enough emotions to pretend to be his old self. It happens every time he’s with the people who know him the best. It’s so exhausting. That’s why he avoids them. All but Kirishima who seems to be a stubborn thorn in his side.

“Get off me, Dunce Face,” Bakugou yells, throwing the arm off his shoulder, making Kaminari laugh. Bakugou’s actually gotten better at his temper so explosions don’t go off. Or at least, that’s what everyone thinks. He just doesn’t have the energy anymore.

He’s in therapy so a lot of people believed that he changed for the better, but Bakugou knows. He knows the real reason why he’s in therapy that no one else beside his therapist knows, and he isn’t going to tell a soul. Not even Kirishima.

“C’mon, Bakubro, don’t be like that,” Kirishima says, slapping Bakugou’s back. 

Bakugou scowls but says nothing. He rolls his eyes and takes a drink of his water. The alcohol hasn’t been passed around yet and he knows better than to go for it himself. It would draw a lot of questions as to why the number one hero would be so eager for the depressant when he has a shift the next day. He just hopes Kirishima or Kaminari would be stupid enough to continuously fill his glass as he kept downing them.

Eventually, everyone arrives and the buzz in the room is as loud as it can be. 

Bakugou can feel a headache coming on and wants so bad to tell Kirishima that he’s bailing, but he refrains. He feels like Kirishima would have a lot of questions if he did leave. The damn bastard has for a while now but Bakugou kept deflecting. He needs to get Shitty Hair off his back. 

He’s been hiding his pain for so long now, why would he want to stop? He’s doing just fine.

Fine.

The first round of alcohol is distributed and Bakuogu hides his eager face. He engages in conversation with Kirishima and Sero who sit on either side of him every now and then, but otherwise, he’s quiet. No one really realizes either as they’re all talking to each other, catching up.

He watches all the happy, laughing faces with distaste as he glances around the room. Almost everyone is married by now and has had a child. Japanese societal expectations and everything. Bakugou is the black sheep. The only single one in the room and he’s happy that way. He will never love someone else like he did–

Bakugou quickly downs his cup of sake and Sero notices it empty and quickly refills it. Bakugou can’t show his gratitude out loud so he just grunts and takes a sip this time, pacing. He plans to get hammered before the night was over anyway. He just hopes Kirishima can throw him into a cab or take him home at the end of the night.

He glances toward Uraraka and Iida who sit across from him. Unwillingly, a glare slips onto his face at their happy expressions. How can they be so happy? 

The absence of the mop of curly, green hair is so blatantly obvious that it makes Bakugou want to explode.

He’s the odd one, though. It’s been over ten years. Of course, everyone has moved on by now. Why couldn’t he?

Didn’t Round face have a crush on the nerd? Wasn’t she in love with him too? How could she be so happy? How could she just… move on?

“What?” Uraraka’s voice cuts through his thoughts, making him actually focus on the people surrounding her. “You can make people hallucinate what they desire most? Even if they don’t know what it is?” 

He glances over to where Uraraka is looking to see an unfamiliar girl on the other side of Sero.

Who is she? Why is she here?

“Yeah, Yuma is awesome,” Sero says as he puts an arm around the unknown extra’s shoulders. 

Sero’s girlfriend, hmm? Bakugou rolls his eyes. Of course. 

“Can you do me?” Uraraka asks excitedly, the red flush to her face the only thing signaling that she isn’t completely sober. Everyone in the room isn’t sober with the amount they’ve been drinking. 

Icy Hot might be the only one , Bakugou notes as the heterochromatic man sits as stoically as ever. Figures. Too good to get drunk, huh? Bakugou downs the rest of his drink. 

He feels his face flush, but he knows he’s not drunk. Everyone thought he was a lightweight because of this, but Bakugou was always sober. He was actually a heavyweight as he would be the last to go down whenever he found himself at a drinking party. He contributes that to his past and how often he drinks.

Bakugou doesn’t care much for anything as the extra makes her way slowly around the table, using her quirk on everyone who is willing. Her face is also flushed. Her pink hair is tied back into a ponytail as she sweats, making Bakugou wonder if the flush is from her quirk or from the alcohol.

It’s when she’s at Kirishima, does Bakugou realize that he’s about to be asked. His first response is to bite her head off or glare at her before she even has the audacity to speak to him, but something stops him.

A voice in the back of his head tells him to accept the upcoming question. Tells him that he’ll be able to see what he’s wanted for so long.

Just the thought of that makes Bakugou simultaneously sick and elated. He’s going to accept. He practically has no other choice.

“What about you?” a voice asks as he glances over to where she’s standing behind him. 

His face automatically morphs into a glare, but she doesn’t seem deterred as she waits patiently for him to answer.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Kaminari states as he leans forward from the other side of Kirishima and Ashido to look at the two. “Bakugou has everything he wants now, what else could he possibly want? Better to back off before you get your head bit off.”

Bakugou redirects his glare towards the damn Pikachu and hardens it further. He doesn’t need people speaking for him, especially a man who fries his brain every time he uses his quirk. What does he know?

Yuma seems to start to shift away, making Bakugou frantic as he replies, “Make it quick.”

She stops, a bit surprised, but places his hands on his head nonetheless. 

Everyone else is deeply surprised as they all look curiously at the two.

Bakugou doesn’t pay them any mind as his heart starts to race. His palms start to sweat and he discreetly wipes them on his pants. He doesn’t need to suddenly explode in the middle of a hallucination, making the girl end it prematurely. He was also curious as to what he would see, not that he didn’t have some sort of idea.

The unfamiliar hands on his head make him want to throw her off, but he refrains. He feels a slight pulse from her hands as he assumes she activates her quirk and he tenses.

He waits for a moment, looking around anxiously, but he doesn’t see anything different. Nothing. Of course. Why did he think he get so luck–

“Kacchan?”

Bakugou’s entire being tensed at the soft-spoken words as he redirects his glare to the table in front of him. The voice came from behind him and he’s so eager to turn back, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t want to be disappointed when he sees nothing there. That it was just a figment of his imagination or a result of the quirk.

“What are you doing, Kacchan?” the voice asks and Bakugou can’t keep himself from turning around this time, tears springing to his eyes.

“Deku,” he breathes quietly as the boy who hasn’t aged a day since they were sixteen stands in front of him. He’s still wearing his hero costume, but instead of showing damage it should have had to it and the boy wearing it, it’s clean and precise. Just how Bakuogu wished it would be.

Bakugou is vaguely aware of a dozen or so sharp intakes of breath, but they soon disappear as does everything else. Soon, it’s just the two of them in the empty room.

Deku tilts his head assessingly, brow furrowed and lips pursed as if he was unhappy with something. “What is this, Kacchan? You were supposed to be better by now. You were supposed to have moved on.”

How could he be and how could he ever? How could Bakugou just forget? Forget everything he did to the nerd and forget about how close they got before…

“Deku,” Bakugou gasps again as tears fall freely this time as he sits on the floor, facing Deku and leaning against the table behind him.

Midoriya drops the scolding look as one of concern crosses his face as he starts forward.

“Hey, hey, why are you crying? Kacchan doesn’t cry.” Midoriya’s hands go to Bakugou’s face as he plops down to his knees in front of the blonde and he’s genuinely surprised when he feels them clasp his head. He didn’t know hallucinations could be so thorough.

Bakugou reaches up and claps the hands holding his face as he leans into them, closing his eyes. What he wouldn’t give to feel this every day. What he wouldn't give to see this every day.

“Kacchan?” Deku prompts.

Bakugou opens his eyes as he stares into worried green ones. “I missed you,” he whispers.

Viridian eyes soften and a small smile graces the freckled face. “I never thought I’d hear you say that, Kacchan.”

“Why did you die, shitty nerd?” Bakugou asks, suddenly angry. The anger he’s been holding onto for over a decade comes out as he glares hard.

Midoriya doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest which is odd to Bakugou, but he’s so happy about it as well. The green eyes soften further as his smile slips from his face.

Bakugou squeezes the hands as they try to pull back. He wouldn’t let the nerd leave him again.

“I had to, Kacchan. I had to defeat him.”

Him. Shigaraki Tomura.

Bakugou remembers the fight clear as day, he just doesn’t think about it. About how his life was ruined as such.

In a last attempt to stop him, Deku had managed to kill Shigaraki, but that wasn’t before he got touched by the other boy. The decay had come fast and hard. It started with his ankle and quickly made its way up Deku’s body.

Bakuogu had watched helplessly as both Shigaraki and Midoriya had gasped. One from the hit from the green-haired boy, and the other because he was suddenly disappearing. Decaying into nothing.

It was only when Shigaraki took his last breath, did the decay stop, and Bakugou blamed himself.

Why didn’t he stop the villain sooner? If he did, Midoriya wouldn’t have been in the condition he was in. His lower half is completely gone while the other gasps in pain.

Bakugou knelt beside Midoriya as no one else was in sight. He wanted to run and find help, but he knew. He knew it would be too late, so he stayed.

“Kacchan,” Midoriya had breathed as his eyes held a knowing look. The damn nerd had known what was about to happen. “Don’t cry. Kacchan doesn’t cry.” 

It was then that Bakugou realized that he had tears flowing freely.

“Shut up, you shitty nerd. Don’t tell me what to do,” he growled back, but it came back with less bite than he intended due to his choked sobs. He watched as Midoriy’s face paled quickly and his gasps got heavier as he struggled to breathe.

“Kacchan, please don’t be sad.” 

Bakugou glared the best he could before Midoriya had weakly lifted his hand. Bakugou stared at it, confused, before a sudden realization hit him, making him cry harder.

He grabbed the hand this time, making Midoriya smile weakly.

“Kacchan took my hand,” Midoriya tries to sing weakly. “Don’t let go,” he says, tone more serious that time.

Bakugou clasps the hand harder as he leans forward, burying his face into the other’s chest. “Never,” he manages to gasp.

The other hand somehow manages to find its way to Bakuogu’s hair as Midoriya starts to pet it weakly. “There, there. It’ll be fine now.”

“How can you say that?” Bakugou growls with anger this time as he lifts himself back up to stare into the boy’s eyes once more.

Midoriya just gave him a sad, knowing look. “Because you’re Kacchan. Kacchan will be the best hero.” Something seems to flash across Midoriya’s mind and eyes as he pulls Bakugou back down to him. “C’mere Kacchan. I need to do something.”

Bakugou goes, confused and still crying as the nerd clasps the front of his torn hero costume and pulls him down. Bakugou can’t help but gasp at the feeling of his lips on Deku’s who takes the opportunity to shove his tongue inside.

The kiss doesn’t last for long as Midoriya falls back to the ground from where he attempted to lean up. His breaths are more ragged now from the exertion of the kiss.

“You idiot! Why would you–” Bakugou is cut off by Midoriya’s weak smile.

“It was a two for one deal. Don’t act like you haven’t kissed me before.” Deku’s voice is becoming quieter, making Bakugou panic, not really processing the words.

“Hey, don’t you fucking dare die on me, you shitty nerd. You need to live. Who else is going to surpass me? No one if you don’t fucking live. You want me to be at the top forever?”

Deku smiles, bigger this time at Bakugou’s words. “Kacchan at the top forever? Sounds like a dream.” His green eyes showed warmth that should have never been shown in such a situation.

It makes Bakugou hate him and simultaneously love him.

“Deku, don’t. Don’t leave me. I–I need you. I love you. Please don’t go.” Bakugou’s words break off into choked sobs and he feels Deku squeeze the hand he’s been holding.

“I think I have to, Kacchan. I don’t think there’s any other choice.” Midoriya’s eyes start to dull and Bakugou turns frantic.

“No! You don’t get to decide to leave without me! You should’ve just fucking taken me with you! How do you want me to become number one after you forced yourself to get so close to me and then leave me like this?!”

Close indeed. After their fight on Ground Beta, they had become proper rivals. Their house arrest furthered that. It was when Bakugou decided to actually grow as a person that they actually became friends. Friendship turned into something more.

It was inevitable with the time they spent with each other in private. Bakugou in Midoriya’s All Might shrine or (mostly) Deku in Bakuogu’s room. Just hanging out. They had only been together for a few months before now.

Deku tries for one last smile as the last hint of life leaves his eyes. He barely manages to whisper, “I’m sorry,” before he leaves Bakugou forever.

Bakugou stares down at the lifeless form, unable to process what actually happened before it hits him all at once.

A scream leaves his lips and he punches the ground in anger with his free hand. The other hand is still gripped tightly in Deku’s. He quickly leans forwards and cries into the still warm chest that was once breathing with life but is now still with death.

He doesn’t know how long he stays like that before someone finds them.

“Bakugou?” Of course it was the Half and Half bastard. “Sensei! Quick! It’s an emergency! Midoriya is–” Todoroki cut himself off and Bakugou doesn’t turn to see his reaction. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered.

Bakugou doesn’t raise his head and doesn’t make any movements as Todoroki approaches. His sobs had quieted by then as he laid his head on the chest.

“Bakugou?” Todoriki had tried again, placing a hand on the other boy’s shoulder. 

Bakugou had tensed quickly, shoving the other boy’s hand off, growling, “Don’t fucking touch me.” He hadn’t taken his eyes off the boy in front of him so he didn’t see Icy Hot’s reaction. He didn’t need to because he didn’t care.

A wave of numbness came over him the longer he continued to stare. He remembers slowly reaching out, closing Deku’s shitty ass eyes before everything else becomes a blur. He doesn't remember anything after that, not that he cares. Deku was dead and Bakugou didn’t save him. Bakugou should have saved him.

It was only after Bakugou was cleared to start training again did he realize he had One For All. He had stared at his hand in shock as the yellow electricity curled around it. He had then glanced up to Kirishima, or where Kirishima had previously been, before he noticed the Shitty Haired bastard meters away, popping up from a crater, spitting out dirt with his eyes wide as he stared at Bakugou.

Bakugou had thoroughly freaked then. He was angry and he was scared. He trashed the entire training grounds before he found his way to the teacher’s lounge. 

All Might had glanced up at the sudden intrusion with confusion before his eyes widened at the sight of Bakugou who kept accidentally using a power he didn’t know how to control.

“Young Bakugou, what happened?”

“That shitty fucking nerd is what happened! This isn’t my power! I don’t want it!” Bakugou yelled, not caring for the other two teachers present. Aizawa had looked at him confused as did Midnight.

All Might quickly steeled his expression before he forced Bakugou to follow him. “This way, Young Bakugou. We need to talk.”

All Might had begun training him after that. His body was already built somewhat for One For All, so he didn’t have much training when it came to physical strength. 

Bakugou ended up keeping OFA, it was the last gift Deku had given him after all, so why would he ever, ever give it away?

He also got really good at putting up a mask. He hid everything then. His pain, worry, fear, and even his anger. Not entirely the anger though because someone would know something was wrong then, but he hid everything else. Including the crushing grief he felt.

He had to go to therapy after Deku’s death. The school ordered it, but it didn’t help. He still hurt . No  matter what the therapist did, or what he talked about, he still hurt.

Everyone kept telling him “Time healed all wounds,” but not this one. No, this one stayed. For weeks. Weeks turned into months and months turned into years. Bakugou hurt, and he didn’t know why. It was like a part of him died that day. A part that he couldn’t get back.

Technically, a part of him did.

He was even suicidal at times, the only thing keeping him going was his work. He would become number one with Deku’s power and he would keep it. It was like Deku himself became number one too.

They had to come up with some shitty lie as well for as to why suddenly Bakugou had garnered a power similar to Midoriya’s, but Bakugou didn’t care about that. He left that to All Might. Let the world know about OFA for all he cared, he would never give it up. Even if he became the villain in the end.

Bakugou will admit that the number of times he thought about just succumbing to his desires was a lot. He’d be able to see Deku then. To apologize for everything and to tell him how much he loved him.

But he refrained. Deku would be disappointed. 

Bakugou wanted to scoff. Since when had he cared about what the nerd thought about him? 

Since Bakugou came to love him.

“Kacchan?” the beautiful voice brings him back to the present as Bakugou stares aimlessly into the green eyes he’d never thought he would see again with life in them.

“I’m here. Don’t go.”

Midoriya shifts closers on his knees as arms wrap around Bakugou’s neck. The most beautiful laugh is released from the other boy’s mouth and Bakugou’s heart squeezes and the tears fall harder.

“I won’t leave you right now, Kacchan, but I can’t stay forever.” 

Bakugou wraps his arms around the hallucination as he pulls the fake Deku to his chest, squeezing as he splays his legs open to get Midoriya closer to him.

“Please stay. Don’t leave me again.” Bakugou buries his face into the mop of green curls, inhaling the forgotten yet familiar scent of Deku’s shampoo.

“I can’t, Kacchan. You know this.”

Bakugou says nothing as he nuzzles the side of Midoriya’s head. He wanted this to last forever. Why did he prevent himself from this for so long?

Oh yeah, his power. Deku’s power.

He shoves the nerd back slightly, only far enough so he could see the other boy’s face as he glares hard.

“Why the fuck did you give me that goddamn power? You should’ve let it go with you since you had given up hope!” Bakugou’s anger comes hard and fast before he deflates at the sad look on Midoriya’s face.

“I had to. You were the only person I would ever trust that power with. All Might’s legacy with. I loved you so much and had for most of my life. The option was rather easy.”

“If I didn’t have this power, I could see you. Could be with you now.”

“I don’t want that. You know it.”

“But it hurts . It hasn’t stopped hurting in years, Deku. Why?”

Tears spring to Midoriya’s eyes now and Bakugou kicks himself mentally. He only gets these few short moments with him and he’s spending it scolding and interrogating the other boy. What was wrong with him? It’s not like he was actually talking to Deku. Just the Deku his mind drew up.

“I’m sorry. I never wanted you to hurt. I wanted you to be strong. My strong Kacchan.”

He pulls the other boy back to his chest as Midoriya cries. “Don’t cry. I’m sorry.”

Midoriya wraps his arms around Bakugou’s waist as he nods against Bakugou’s chest. “You’ve gotten bigger.”

Bakugou scoffs. “Of course I have. I’m twenty-eight now.”

Midoriya leans back and Bakugou notices that the tears have stopped. His have too.

“Really?” Deku’s eyes slide up and down his body. “Kacchan, sugoi!”

The tears come back at the familiar words. Damn this nerd, making him cry so much.

“You should be this old too.”

Midoriya’s happiness dies with that as she shifts to his knees in front of Bakugou who leans weakly against the table behind him.

“I know. And you know too. We both know. It was inevitable.”

“Not if I had stopped him.”

Deku looks angry now. “Kacchan, stop that. You were meters away. You couldn’t have.”

“Since when were a few meters enough to stop me?”

“Since we were teenagers in high school, and you were badly hurt.”

They’re silent for a moment and Bakugou opens his arms again. He wants to spend these moments actually being able to touch the damn nerd, not just have him sit in front of Bakugou.

Midoriya complies, crawling over before sitting sideways, leaning his shoulder against Bakugou’s chest. Bakugou rests his chit atop Midoriya’s head, the curly fluff tickling his nose, making him sad because he knows this isn’t real.

“I’m number one.”

“Kacchan, sugoi!” 

Bakugou rolls his achy eyes. Of course, that’s how the nerd would react. “You technically are too. It’s your power I’m using though I’m pretty sure I can’t use all of it. I think the progression of it stopped with you. I can only use the powers you could have before you died. Black Whip and Float. Though, I never use any but One For All in battle.”

Midoriya sits up to look Bakugou in the eye. “That’s still amazing, Kacchan! I’m so happy you’re using it.”

“It was my last gift from you so why wouldn’t I?”

Midoriya slowly stiffens in his arms, pulling back to look Bakugou in the face. “Promise me something Kacchan.”

Bakugou’s suspicions rise but he chooses to push them down in favor of Midoriya’s words. “Promise what?”

Midoriya produces a soft smile. “Promise me you’ll live. I need to know that you’ll live for me Kacchan.”

Bakugou sags in defeat and disappointment. “You know how bad that will hurt. Why do you ask that of me?”

Midoriya continues to smile softly even if it’s a little strained now before he gets an odd look in his eye. “Kacchan,” he says softly, making Bakugou tense in suspicion. “It’s time.”

“No!” Bakugou tenses, wrapping his arms around the nerd who just smiles weakly at him.

“The time limit’s up, Kacchan. I don’t know much about her but this is the longest hallucination she’s done, I think so she’s pretty worn out.”

Reality fluctuates back in flashes as Bakugou goes from the fantasy world to the present and back. 

“Deku—Izuku, no. Please. Don’t go. How do you expect me to go on now?”

Midoriya sits back and gives Bakugou his best smile. “Because Kacchan is Kacchan. You’ll live because I asked you to no matter how bad it hurts. I love you Katsuki.” With that, Midoriya leans in, placing a soft kiss on Bakugou’s lips, cutting off any words Bakugou tries to produce.

Bakugou just cries silently as he watches Deku disappear, still smiling sweetly at him.

The next moment, he’s back to reality as he still sits, facing the wall, staring at a now empty space.

The girl beside him pants as she falls into her boyfriend's lap and Bakugou takes one glance to see her face is redder than before and she’s sweating hard as she pants, staring at Bakugou.

“What the—” she starts but cuts herself off. “It’s like I couldn’t stop until I ran out of energy.”

Bakugou is still staring mutely at the wall as Kirishima on the other side of him grabs his shoulder.

“Bro, what happened? You saw Midoriya? What? We thought you were over—”

Bakugou roughly shoves his hand away. “Shut the fuck up, Shitty Hair.” He turns to glare at him only to see everyone in the room staring at him and his heart stops. They didn’t hear what he said, did they?

“We heard everything,” Kaminari pipes up as if reading his thoughts. “What do you mean you have Midoriya’s power?”

“I always thought…” Todoroki trails off.

Bakugou suddenly stands, glaring at everyone in the room. “It’s none of your fucking business! Leave me the fuck alone and forget this ever happened.” 

He starts to storm out of the room and hears Kirishima struggling to his feet to run after him so he stops and turns around.

“Leave. Me. Alone.”

Kirishima pauses from where he was rising up. “I don’t think you should be alone right now, Man. Not after what you just said.”

“It’s none of your goddamn business.”

“It is. We didn’t know you were hurting this bad.”

Anger burns through Bakugou. “I am not hurting. I’m fine. I have been fine and I will be fine now leave. Me. Alone.” With one last earth-shaking glare sent towards Kirishima, Bakugou’s out the door, stumbling out of the restaurant.

*  *  *

Bakugou called in the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that. He just couldn’t find it in himself to leave his bed. 

He knew that it wasn’t something the number one should do. The hero rankings were fragile as is since Dabi had come out about Endeavor's familial issues. There were only a certain few heroes still in work, the only few accepted by society and he was at the top of them. He needed to go in.

He spent the last few days flipping through memory books and going through all of Deku’s memorabilia that he had gotten from Inko.

She was the only one to know about their relationship. Deku had been so adamant about telling her after they got together. She accepted them with open arms much to Bakugou’s surprise when he thought he would be shunned away for how he treated Midoriya in the past.

She was the only one to truly comfort him after Deku died too, giving him the majority of Deku’s things.

Bakugou hadn’t cried as much as he did those last few days since Midoriya died. 

He wanted to see Deku again. Had to see him again. 

The only thing that motivated him to start his life again was the fact that the girl, Sero’s girlfriend, was still out there and had the power to make him see Deku again. It was that thought that got him to work today.

“Bakugou,” Todoroki says as Bakugou enters the agency.

He hates to admit it, but he works for the half and half bastard. Starting an agency on his own was too much effort for him to live with, so he opted to go to the strongest agency instead.

“What do you want?” Bakugou snaps, not wanting to deal with the questions he knew the other man had.

Todoroki looks completely unfazed by the words. “We need to talk.” 

“Nothing to talk about.”

Heterochromatic eyes stare at him, knowing, but Bakugou doesn’t give in. He didn’t want to talk about it. He would deal with his personal demons himself like how he’s always done.

“In my office. Now,” Todoroki says finally, asserting his authority, making Bakugou bristle and want to shout, but he reigns it in.

Huffing, he follows the icy hot bastard to his office where he finds a handful of his friends, or well, people who call themselves his friends. He stops and turns around when he sees them.

“Hell no.”

“Bakugou.” Todoroki grabs the back of his collar, pulling him back. “If you want to keep your job, get your ass in my office now.”

“Fuck off.” Bakugou debates for a moment. Was the job that important to him? A glance in the room said no, but abruptly a greenette with freckles flashes in his mind, his smile enough to light up a room and suddenly the job was that important.

Glaring, he shoves Todoroki off him as he enters, plopping down in the only empty chair in front of the desk.

“What do you fuckers want?”

“We want to talk,” Ashido pipes up from her spot beside her husband on the couch by the wall. Kaminari sits on the other side of her with Jirou leaning against the couch arm. Sero is on the other side of Kirishima, leaning against the couch arm as well and Bakugou’s slightly disappointed to see his girlfriend wasn’t with him. That means Bakugou will just have to find her later.

Deku’s shitty ass friends line the other side of the room, all standing against the barrier as they stare at him.

Bakugou shifts uncomfortably, feeling like he’s an animal in a zoo being observed by the attendees.

“Nothing to fucking talk about,” Bakugou finally says, glaring at anyone who meets his eye which is everyone. It makes him glare harder and snap at tha then at the pity in their eyes. He didn’t need their fucking pity.

“Why don’t we start with the fact that the thing you wanted most was to see Midoriya again,” Kaminari says, shifting forward, placing his elbows on his knees. “It’s been over ten years man. We didn’t know you were still hurting.”

Bakugou tenses as he bites out, “I’m not fucking hurting. Leave me alone. I don’t want to talk about it. Especially in this fucking intervention.”

“You need to discuss it. We had no idea you felt that way about Midoriya,” Uraraka pipes up, earning his glare in return.

“I don’t feel no fucking way.”

Shinso scoffs. “Sure you don’t bud, with all the begging and crying.”

Bakugou flushes as humility washes over him. He wanted no one to see that. Deku was the only one who was supposed to see that. 

Asui hits Shinso hard in the side, making him gasp and bend over, clutching the point of impact. “That was very rude, Hitoshi. Kero.”

Shinso gasps and nods, face red. “You’re right. That was out of line.” His voice comes out strained and any other time, Bakugou would’ve laughed, but he’s not feeling up to it now. No feeling much of anything actually.

Bakugou stays mute as his skin starts to feel itchy from all of the stares. He’s seconds away from saying fuck it and getting the hell out of there, Deku be damned when Kirishima finally pipes up.

“C’mon bro. Talk to us. We’re sorry we didn’t know sooner. We should’ve known but we didn’t.” The words irritate Bakugou. 

“Cause I didn’t want you fuckers to know damn it,” Bakugou finally snaps. “It was exhausting keeping up with the bare minimum let alone this shit.”

“Did you love Midoriya?” Uraraka goes straight for the jugular on that one.

Bakugou turns his glare to her. “So the fuck if I did? It’s none of your business.”

“It is if it’s still affecting you to this day,” Kirishima says.

“It’s not affecting me. I’m doing just fine, can’t you see that?”

Everyone looks pained at that.

“You’re not fine, man. You already took three days off. If you hadn’t come in today, this,” Kirishima motions to everyone, “would be happening at your place.”

“I still managed to get by for ten years so I think I did pretty good.”

“You cut yourself off from everyone,” Sero says, his usual smile nowhere to be found.

“Was easier that way.”

“But why?” Ashido asks and Bakugou feels himself boil over at all the questions.

“Because I fucking loved him, okay?! We weren’t even together for long before he went off and got himself fucking killed! Told me it had to happen like it was the only choice or something! I fucking loved him and when he died, it was like a part of me died with him.”

Everyone’s silent as Bakugou stares mutely at the floor, biting his tongue hard enough to make it bleed.

A hand clasps his shoulder, pushing him back into the seat he didn’t know he was rising from as Todoroki tells him to stay put before letting go.

“No, I’m fucking done. Job be damned, I’m out. How dare you make me talk about this.”

“It’s something that needs to be talked about, Bakugou-kun,” Iida says from the other side of the room.

“And I’ve fucking talked about it. Time and time again. Talking about it does nothing . I still hurt in the end and nothing will change.”

“I can’t let you go back out in the field if I think there’s even the slightest chance you might willingly not make it back,” Todoroki states firmly.

“I’m not fucking suicidal.” He was.

Everyone looks at him doubtfully.

“Yeah, I’ve thought about it but when it boils down to it, I can’t do it. I have something better that needs to be done and maintained.”

“This have to do with Midoriya’s power?” Mind Fuck asks, making Bakugou turn his glare to him. 

He still wasn’t over that earlier comment.

“You said you had his power. That it was technically him that was number one. What did you mean by that?”

Bakugou glares at Shinso, not wanting to answer the man, grudge still intact before Kirishima prompts.

“Bakugou?” The tenderness in Shitty Hair’s voice is too much for Bakugou so he explodes.

“Fuck, fine! I don’t know what shit lie All Might told you, but yeah, I got the nerd’s shitty ass power. He decided to give it to me before he fucking died and it’s technically the only thing keeping me alive right now. Is that what you fucks wanted to hear?”

Ashido, who was already crying at this point, sobs harder, leaning into Kirishima’s side.

“That’s not what we wanted to hear but it needed to be said,” Todoroki says finally. “I can’t have a suicidal hero out in the field, Bakugou.”

Bakugou feels his face pale at that. “You can’t do this to me, Todoroki. That is the only thing keeping me going at the moment. Don’t you fucking take that from me too.”

Todoroki is visibly taken aback by the words, but it just proved how serious Bakugou was about it. He couldn’t sit in his apartment surrounded by the temptation of Deku’s things and he had absolutely no energy to go out.

“I’m seeing a therapist and if she says I need to be taken out, you can take me out, but not until then. I’ve been perfectly fine until now.”

Todoroki seems to contemplate for a moment before nodding. “Fine, but you are taking a few more days off. Don’t worry, you’ll have someone with you at all times.”

“Fuck that. I’m not doing that. I’d rather be alone. Everyone has kids already anyway and I’ll be damned if I have brats around me all the time.”

“Not everyone has children, Bakugou,” Todoroki states. “And even the ones that do, it’s not like both people need to be there. We can figure something out.”

“I don’t want you to figure anything out! I’m fine.”

“You’re not, but okay. You’re still getting visitors often on your leave.”

Bakugou glares up towards Todoroki who’s unmoving at the familiar stare. He’s so pissed right now. He doesn’t need any goddamn babysitters yet this half and half bastard was so insistent. He couldn’t stand people in his home.

“I don’t want babysitters.”

“Consider them your friends instead because that’s what they are.”

“Oh fuck off.”

“Bakugou,” Kirishima says, cutting off the argument between the other two. “Just let us come over. There’s no harm in it.”

“It is if I don’t want you assholes in my home.”

“Then come over to our place,” Kirishima offers.

“Hell no.”

“Why not?”

“Because I feel more comfortable at mine.”

“Maybe it would do you some good to not be stuck in the same place constantly,” Kirishima tries.

“I don’t want to get out.”

“That’s exactly our point.”

Bakugou glares hard at the Shitty Haired bastard that just won’t stop. “If I’m taking a few days off, I’ll spend it however I please. I will not have a babysitter,” he says pointedly to Todoroki who opens his mouth to protest but Bakugou continues before he could. “I will allow people to visit but no one is staying longer than I’m comfortable with.”

Todoroki shuts his mouth as he contemplates. “A few hours.”

“What?” Bakugou asks.

“A few hours is the minimum because knowing you, you’ll let someone in then tell them to leave if I leave the time limit up to you.”

Bakugou clenches his jaw and says nothing. That was exactly what he planned to do.

“So three hours is the time limit and people can stay longer if you allow but no less.”

Bakugou exhales loudly through his nose but says nothing. That was so much better than the original plan. “Fine. I’m out of here now.”

Bakugou stands and quickly strides towards the door only pausing when he reaches it, turning around to glare at everyone in the room.

“Don’t any of you assholes speak a word of what happened here to anyone, do you understand. I can’t believe you actually did this. And especially don’t tell anyone about my power. That was supposed to stay between me and Deku, you guys were just an accident” He glances once over the room to see everyone nod hesitantly. “This counts as the visitation for today so leave me the hell alone.”

Everyone’s silent and Bakugou thinks he’s off the hook when someone speaks up.

“Speaking of,” Mind Fuck starts. “We have questions about your power.”

“Well fuck off because you are absolutely not getting anything from me. It’s none of your goddamn business so leave it. I’ll kill you if you tell anyone.”

Shinso stares at him, the bags under his eyes make his face something Bakugou wants to hit even more if that was possible before he nods.

Bakugou sighs in relief and finally leaves without anyone stopping him. Once the door to the office slams shut, the mask he’s been holding onto for dear life crumples as he makes his way out.

Luckily, there’s no one on this floor to see him crying as such and he manages to pull it together by the time he makes it back down to the lobby. He just wants to go home and forget any of that just happened.

*  *  *

Bakugou wasn’t a stalker. He’s not. It’s just he needs to at least talk to her.

That’s what he keeps telling himself as he waits outside of the extra’s—Sero’s girlfriend’s apartment. He just needs to speak with her. He doesn’t even remember her name.

He shifts uncomfortably from where he’s leaning against the concrete wall on the other side of the street. He pulls the hood on his head further down when a couple walks past, talking aimlessly and ignoring him. Or maybe they don’t see him. He doesn’t care.

Finally, finally , someone walks out of the apartment building and he looks up, eager only to sag in disappointment when he sees a man walking down the street instead.

He has literally nothing else better to do so he waits. 

It was his last day off, thank fuck, but it was also the last time he could talk to her as he was going to be buried in work once he got back. 

He perks up again when a cab pulls up and relief washes over him when he sees a pink-haired girl step out. In the next moment, he’s scurrying over.

“Thank you,” she says, shutting the door before the cab driver takes off. It’s pitch black other than the illumination from the apartment building and street lamps so she doesn’t notice when Bakugou walks over.

“I need to speak with you,” he says and she startles, letting out a scream before she cuts it off as she hastily steps away from him. She clutches her chest as she pants and Bakugou watches at the fear in her eyes turns to recognition back to fear then to pity.

It pisses him off. He doesn’t need pity.

“Dynamight?” she asks, clarifying.

Bakugou just grunts, pushing his hands further into the pockets of his pants. He throws his hood off after a moment to look less intimidating, trying to ease her worry.

“What are you doing here?” She asks it in a tone like she already knows, making Bakugou clench his jaw.

“Seems like you already know.”

She sighs finally, nodding slowly. “I know. I made the mistake. We were drunk and it never should’ve happened.”

“So, are you gonna do it?” he asks, not even addressing what he wants. He just can’t . He would be vulnerable then, more than he already was and he wasn’t ready at the moment. If she agreed, she was going to see him be even more vulnerable.

She sighs, assessing him with saddened eyes before shaking her head and making Bakugou’s hackles rise.

“Why—!” he starts to yell, only to be cut off my her calm words.

“I avoid people like you,” she states. “People who have lost loved ones. My power… it’s addicting to them. Had I known that night, I would’ve never offered.”

“Well you did and here I am. I’m not addicted. I just need one more chance.” He kicks a pebble on the ground, making it bounce over a few times before rolling to a stop some ways away. His eyes never leave her face.

“That’s what addicts say. ‘No, I’m not.’ ‘One more time.’ ‘I need it.’” Her sympathetic look deepens with her words.

Bakugou glares at her, clenching his jaw. He wasn’t some junkie looking for his next fix. He just wanted one last time. To say goodbye, properly.

“I just want to say goodbye.”

Her eyes visibly soften as she asses him again before her eyes harden. “You’re not in the right state of mind for that.”

Bakugou scoffs. “That’s what I’m trying to fix.”

She sighs sadly. “It’s not going to fix things. If anything, it’ll only make things harder for you.” She asses him once more and he lets her, hoping she’ll change her mind. He knows he can’t make her. “I’ll tell you what. You get better mentally and I’ll let you say goodbye properly.”

Bakugou sighs in anger, running a hand through his hair. “It’s been ten years already. There’s no getting better for me. I just want to say goodbye and move on.” 

Deku said he wanted Bakugou to live and Bakugou still had a few things to say to the nerd for that.

Bakugou’s anger rises at the stubborn look in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she says, making Bakugou wants to yell and release blasts from his hand but he stays stoic. He glares holes at the ground before nodding once and leaving.

Fuck her then. He doesn’t need her.

“I’m not sure,” she calls out, making him pause again but he doesn’t turn around. “I’m not sure about anything. The things I heard that night don’t make sense to me but I’ll keep your secret. I know nothing about you or your loved one but I do know this. Try talking to someone who could share the pain you’re feeling. Someone who was as close to him as you. A parent or something.”

He heard shuffling and knows she was walking away. He only starts walking again after he asses she had already left, head down the entire way home.

The first person that came to mind was Inko. She shared his pain but he’d already talked to her. Hell, he had stayed with her often until he couldn’t anymore. He couldn’t look at her without seeing that shitty nerd in her.

Another person pops into his mind making him fumble with his keys as he was getting them out of his pocket to unlock his apartment door.

He hasn’t seen that other person since high school. Bakugou actually avoids him at all costs. He was someone that both he and Deku loved.

Bakugou sighs, pushing his door open with a creak. He’ll talk All Might.

*  *  *

“Bakugou-shounen,” All Might says as Bakugou stands outside of the classroom in UA. 

Bakugou had avoided coming at all costs until it made itself relatively clear that he would need to find the shitty hero at UA if he ever wanted to speak to him. Their schedules never lined up so he had come here during his only free time for the next two weeks. He was even still in his hero outfit.

“I need to talk when you have time,” he says before turning to leave. He would just wait until class was over.

All Might’s skeleton-like hand reaches out and clasps his shoulder, halting his movements as All Might frantically says, “We can talk now. I just need to find someone to cover my class.” All Might quickly releases him before pulling out his phone to call some shitty teacher.

Bakugou glances around the familiar halls with distaste as he hears the class within the room buzz as they realize who was outside.

“Dynamight!”

“It’s Dynamight!”

“He’s so hot! And scary!”

Bakugou sighs and walks further away from the door. He couldn’t deal with kids when he was about to unload everything onto All Might.

“We just need to wait until he gets here,” All Might says after hanging up, glancing to where Bakugou was a few feet down the hallway. “You didn’t call or text so I was surprised.”

Bakguou shrugs. “Didn’t have any time. Plus I blew my phone up.” He blew it up after his shitty so-called friends kept blowing it up after his time off. He still hadn’t gotten around to getting a new one.

“I see,” All Might says seemingly not phased by the words as if it wasn’t unusual for Bakugou to do that. Bakugou’s not sure how he feels about that but he can’t blame the older man. “I need to tell my class. One second.” All Might leaves him in the hallway, making a knot form in Bakugou’s throat. He could practically see the memories running through the hallway.

The bouncy green curls running after him like they always fucking did.

“Kacchan!”  

He physically looks up at that. The voice rang in his ears so clearly as if he actually heard the damn nerd.

He wipes his eyes in frustration. He needed to get over this. He just needed it to stop hurting.

“So it’s you, Problem Child,” Aizawa’s voice floats over, making Bakugou look up from where he had begun staring, more like glaring, at the floor to avoid looking around.

Aizawa had gotten older, to say the least, but that was expected. He still looked the same otherwise. The only telling signs were actually his crow’s feet and the graying hair. 

“Sensei,” Bakugou acknowledges. It’s all he can do at the moment so he says nothing else.

Aizawa’s eyes roam over him tentatively and he tenses up, not knowing what the man will find.

Without another word, he turns and opens the door, signaling for All Might’s departure.

“Bakugou-shounen,” All Might says reentering the hallway, waving in the opposite direction of Bakugou. “Shall we?”

They walk in silence for a while until All Might speaks up once more.

“I suppose I should drop the shounen now, shouldn’t I? You’re not a boy anymore.” 

Bakugou can feel All Might’s eyes on him but he doesn't turn his head. He wasn’t here to make small talk. He just grunts and carries on.

“Have a seat,” All Might says as they enter his office, gesturing towards the couch.

Bakugou plops down, slouching and getting comfortable, spreading his legs apart, feet planted firmly on the ground.

“Would you like some tea—”

“I’m not Deku. You can sit down now,” Bakugou snaps. He knows he’s being extremely rude to his elder but he can’t help the embarrassment that’s overcome him. He can’t believe he’s actually here seeking All Might’s help.

Bakugou notices the way All Might flinches at Deku’s name and he too feels himself sadden at it. It’s why he was here after all.

All Might takes a seat across from Bakugou in a chair. He seems to have aged another ten years by the time Bakugou actually looks at him, making Bakugou feel like shit. It was his own fault though.

“So, Bakugou-shou—Bakugou-san. What brings you here today?”

Bakugou bites his tongue. The words he wants to leave his mouth get stuck in his throat. Tears sting his eyes as he stares at the ground.

All Might waits patiently for Bakugou to gather his thoughts much to Bakugou’s silent thankfulness.

“I, uh,” he starts before his voice breaks. He quickly clears his throat and sits up, hoping the better position would help him save face. “I have some questions, I guess. There are some things I need to tell you too. I guess I’ll tell you from the beginning.”

All Might sits quietly as Bakugou describes the past events. He tells his previous mentor everything. All the way back to UA. All the way back to before Deku died. Bakugou lets his heart out.

He’s sobbing by the end of it, barely realizing he just laid all of that on his former teacher without any forewarning. 

The couch shifts beside him as he feels All Might sit down next to him and wrap his arms around Bakugou tentatively at first but when Bakugou makes no further moves of rejection, they solidify.

Bakugou leans into him, crying now, accepting the man’s warm, comforting embrace. It’s only when his own sobs subside does he realize that All Might was crying too.

“I’m sorry,” Bakugou says finally, voice hoarse. 

“Don’t be sorry, Shounen. I’m very happy I was the one you decided to tell.” They both straighten but All Might keeps a comforting arm around Bakugou who doesn’t break away from the hold.

“You were the only one who… who I felt like could understand. His mom, Auntie, I couldn’t go to her, not with a lot of it. Thanks for listening to me.” Bakugou brings his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them. It’s such a childish stance but it’s a comforting one. One that relieves Bakugou of a lot of anxiety surprisingly.

“I’m sorry you’re still hurting over it. I understand now why. I suppose I do have some things to tell you as well that I neglected to tell you previously. It was only when you spoke of the hallucination did I realize.”

Bakugou looks up. “Realize what?”

“You weren’t there when I explained things to… to Midoriya-shounen because at the time, you weren’t really in on the secret about One For All. Us bearers of the power, we’re able to see glimpses of our past selves, but only as lights. Or at least, that’s how it was for me and my predecessor. Midoriya-shounen was different, however. He told me that he could see the previous holders. That he could talk to them. That he even spoke to the first.” All Might clenches a fist as realization seems to dawn on Bakugou.

“You think…”

“You have that power now. There’s a possibility you might be able to see them too.”

“Deku was a previous holder. You’re saying I can see Deku?” Bakugou tries not to let his elation show but he slips up as All Might’s face furrows further into a frown.

“That’s not a good idea, Shounen. I don’t even know how he did it or if you could do it. You said the progression of One For All stopped with Midoriya-shounen. Maybe the visions did too.”

“I have to try. All Might, I have to see him if I can.”

All Might seems hesitant as he looks over Bakugou.

“I just want to say goodbye,” Bakugou says, trying to push All Might into telling him.

All Might eventually sighs and relents, making Bakugou go euphoric and eager as he sits up tall, placing his feet back onto the ground. “There was that one time when he discovered Black Whip during that one training camp. He told me Shinso stopped him and with that, he saw the owner of Black Whip. Previously, during the sports festival, the first time he ever saw their silhouettes was also when he was fighting Shinsou.”

Bakugou frowns at that, his stare hardening. Of course it was Mind Fuck who he needed to talk to. Of course.

Bakugou quickly stands after that, startling All Might who hurriedly asks as Bakugou makes his way to the door, “Bakugou-san? Where are you heading?”

“I’m gonna have Mind Fuck brainwash me, that’s what.” He pauses his hurried haste at the door, turning to All Might who was scrambling to his feet after unfreezing from his apparent shock. “Thank you, All Might,” Bakugou says sincerely. “Thank you.” With that, he’s out the door with All Might yelling after him.

“There are things about—about—you know that we need to discuss. Please call me later.”

Bakugou waves over his shoulder in acknowledgment before he’s gone.

*  *  *

“Oi,” Bakugou says as he kicks open the door to Shinsou’s office. 

Tired eyes meet his, widening slightly when they process who he was before narrowing.

“What do you want?”

“I need you to do something for me.” Bakugou hates the idea of asking this shitty bastard for anything, but knowing that Deku could be so close, he can’t stop himself. He’ll revel in the mortification later.

Shinsou’s brows raise in astonishment as Bakugou clanks his way into the room, slamming the door behind him. “Do you now?” Shinsou asks in a mock tone.

“Yes,” Bakugou says, not wanting to fuck with the other guy. “I need you to brainwash me.”

Shinsou’s eyes widen enormously wide as his mouth drops open in shock. He quickly schools his features and Bakugou sees the other boy assessing his features. “You’re serious.”

“As cancer. Look, I need you to do it for me. I spoke with All Might and he gave me a few clues. I need to test something though.”

“I’m not doing it until you tell me why.”

Bakugou’s eyes finally hardened. “I’ll tell you after. I can’t—I need this right now and I really don’t need you all up in my psyche before it happens, okay?”

Shinsou’s eyes narrow and Bakugou glares back. He didn’t want to grovel but here he was.

“Fine.”

Bakugou sighs in relief. "Thank fuc—”

Everything goes hazy then as Bakugou assumes Shinsou’s brainwashing was working. The fog washes over him then all of a sudden he’s in a storm. A blizzard, more like with the wind blowing everywhere. He glances down at himself to see that he’s all there even if it didn’t feel like it before looking around the black and purplish haze.

He’s confused. There was no one in sight. 

He grunts and kicks the ground in frustration. He tries to cuss, only to realize his mouth was covered with something. It looked like the fog he was surrounded in.

Anxiety sets in and he tries to pull it off to no avail. His panic worsens at that. It’s giving him flashbacks to an event he had long forgotten. He suddenly can’t breathe and he feels it everywhere . 

Sludge crawling all over his body as he struggles to breathe. He can breathe though, through his nose, but he doesn’t realize that, blinded by his own panic.

“--cchan! Kacchan! Calm down! Breathe,” a voice finally floats through his panic, and wide, emerald eyes meet his, instantly making him slump in defeat as he feels hands on him. “It’s okay,” Deku soothes.

Bakugou’s breathing heavily through his nose as he realizes everything was all in his head. All the panic, the sensations. He could breathe. He was fine. He wasn’t going to die. Deku was in front of him.

That thought makes him look up with wide eyes staring at the boy who was looking down at him with such panic and worry.

Bakugou belatedly realized that his body that was previously uncovered was now consumed by that fog. All that was left was his silhouette. How was he supposed to see Deku like this?

“Are you better now?” Deku asks and Bakugou slowly nods his head.

He tries to say a few words but nothing comes out and frustration overcomes him.

Midoriya must realize Bakugou’s predicament as he looks at with sympathetically and says, “I know Kacchan. You won’t be able to speak. It was like that for me too.”

Bakugou’s eyes narrow and his frustration grows impossibly more. He just needed to speak with the damn nerd!

“What are you doing here, Kacchan?” Deku asks after a moment, eyes assessing him. 

Bakugou feels tears prick his eyes as he realizes this was actually Deku. Not one his head thought up. Not a hallucination, but one that was left within One For All. Bakugou’s never been more thankful for this power in his life.

Midoriya’s eyes widen in shock as must see the tears as he hurriedly asks, “Are you okay?! Why are you crying? Kacchan!”

Bakugou tries to speak, tries to yell but the only thing to come out after that was muffled words. He blinks, realizing he managed to get something out this time.

“I’m sorry,” Deku says, his hands going to Bakugou’s face to wipe the tears. “I shouldn’t have asked. I know you can’t speak and I think I know why you’re here.”

Bakugou tilts his head quizzically. Maybe Deku knows what he’s thinking since he’s within the power that now resides within Bakugou.

“I’m not for sure though. Your thoughts aren’t able to penetrate OFA so I can only assume. I vaguely remember speaking to you before. You talked about how it hurt you. That I died.” Remorse washes over Midoriya’s features but all Bakugou could think about was the words he said.

That was Deku he talked to previously? Actual Deku? He wasn’t a hallucination? If so, then why did he appear in the real world as one? Everyone heard their conversation, even if it was only Bakuogu’s side.

Midoriya runs his hands through Bakugou’s unhidden hair as he places his forehead on Bakugou’s.

“I can practically hear your thoughts, Kacchan. That girl, she had a hallucination quirk, didn’t she?”

Bakguou nods the best he can, giving a grunt of confirmation as well.

Midoriya sighs. “I thought so. I—we, everyone within this power have been dormant for so long. I remember being vaguely awake. I could watch what you did, but I never really had any thoughts. When that girl used her quirk, I think it combined with OFA and I was brought out fully. Kacchan, I”m sorry I hurt you.”

Viridian eyes stare into his and Bakgou’s heart hurts to see such sadness there. He never wanted Midoriya to hurt. Never wanted him to die yet here they were. He let both of that happen.

“But why are you here Kacchan? You were supposed to live for me.” Midoriay places a soft kiss on Bakgou’s forehead, making Bakugou’s eyes close as he relishes in it. “I”m happy you are here though. There are things I need to tell you. About this power. I wasn’t all me that time, otherwise, I would’ve remembered to tell you these things.”

Bakugou opens his eyes again, waiting for Midoriay to continue.

“I, uh, I talked to some of the previous holders after I… died.” Midoriya’s eyes cut to Bakgou’s who winces and begins to stare at the ground. “And I learned a few things. Had I known before Kacchan, I wouldn’t have given you my power.”

The desperation in Midoriya’s voice makes Bakugou’s eyes widen as he looks back up to the other boy. What did he learn?

“Remember when All Might studied up about the previous successors and how he didn’t have much on the fourth user? Well, I learned why. His name was Shinomori Hagake and he was forty when he died of old age.”

Bakugou’s brows furrow in confusion as Midoriya looks at him remorsefully.

“I’m sorry Kacchan. He died because of OFA. I’ll describe it as they did to me. A person's like a cup. If they already have a quirk, then that cup is already full. Adding OFA would make that cup overflow. All Might was quirkless, did you know that? He was like me. His cup was empty as was mine so receiving OFA didn’t do anything to us, but you…” Familiar tear-filled eyes meet Bakuogu’s, making him wince at the sight. “You have a quirk, Kacchan. A big one. I’m so sorry. If I could take it back, I would. I wouldn’t have ever given you this power.”

As Bakugou processes the words, relief hits him harder than he expects, making him exhale loudly through his nose. That means he won’t live for much longer. He closes his eyes and he can feel himself smile behind the fog that was clutching him.

Midoriya takes his relief to be horror as he cries harder, “I’m sorry Kacchan. Please give this power away as soon as you can.”

Bakugou opens his eyes and shakes his head at that. He glares at Midoriya as muffled words fall from his mouth.

“--an ks oo,” stumbles from his mouth and he realizes that if he did it right, he might be able to formulate words. “‘M eep wer.”

“What?” Midoriya asks as his crying subsides for a moment as he tries to make sense of Bakugou’s mumbling.

“‘M eepn pwer.”

“You’re keeping my power?” Midoriya asks, astonished. 

Bakugou nods vehemently, glaring at Midoriya as if asking the other boy to challenge him.

“But Kacchan, you’ll die!”

Bakuogu nods again.

Midoriya looks at him as if he grew two heads. “You want to die?” The words come out whispered and quiet as if Midoriya doesn't want to know the answer.

Bakugou neither shakes nor nods his head, just continues to stare at the other boy.

“Kacchan, why would you—” Midoriya breaks off as if thinking hard. “You want to be with me, don’t you? Not this me, but the actual me.”

Bakugou continues to stay stoic, neither confirming nor denying.

Midoriya’s face softens as he cups Bakuogu’s in such a familiar way. “Kacchan,” he whispers brokenly. 

“I need it,” Bakugou says, the words still come out muffled but it seems like Deku’s finally putting his brain to use by deciphering the words.

“You don’t need to die, Kacchan!”

“I need you though. I’ve lived my life and if this is my fate, I’ll gladly accept.”

Midoriya glares at him now, pulling his hands back. “No, you need to live a full life. One of happiness. Get married. Have a kid. Live .”

“My life stopped the day yours did. I won’t ever move on. I won’t ever be happy again. I just know it. No matter what happens, what I do, I just can’t Izuku .”

Midoriya stares at him brokenly. 

“You shouldn't have died on me if you didn’t want this to happen. We were supposed to be the best heroes out there. You made me better and I made you better. We completed each other, don’t you see? When you died, you took my other half. I used to not believe in soulmates, but I do now. I know you’re mine. If you were anyone else, I’d have been able to move on by now, but I haven’t. Let me at least have this. I will live out the rest of my life as you asked of me, but when my time comes, it comes.”

Midoriya spends a moment, processing the words, his eyes softening with each one he decyphers. “You know the real me will be so mad at you right?” he asks softly as defeat washes over his features.

Bakugou sags in relief and nods. Yeah, Deku would be mad at him. He’ll be so pissed when he finds out but Bakugou would appease for that. He’d make it up to the other boy.

A sudden, abrupt idea flows into his head and he smiles through the fog. He knows exactly what to do to appease the other boy for when they meet again. 

“It seems your time it up, Kacchan,” Midoriya says, bringing Bakugou’s eyes to his. He walks up to Bakugou and places another kiss on Bakugou’s forehead. “I love you so much Kacchan. I know I can’t dissuade you anymore, but I will tell you this. You better live the rest of what time you do have to make it up to me.”

Bakugou nods as everything around him begins to fade. He already knows what he wants to do. He’s never been more determined in his life. Never wanted to see something through so much since Deku died.

“I love you,” Bakugou says and he watches as Midoriya practically melts where he stands.

“Until I see you again, Kacchan. Goodbye.”

Bakugou’s suddenly brought back to the present as he blinks blearily from where he’s sitting in front of Shinsou’s desk.

Shinsou’s staring at him with his chin on his folded hands.

“What?” Bakugou asks gruffly, shifting forward and rubbing his face. His muscles feel stiff and he rolls his shoulders to relieve some of the tension.

Shinsou continues to stare at him silently, making him glare in return.

“What?” he asks again, gruffer this time.

“You have to have a lot of trust in me to let me do that to you,” Shinsou says and Bakuogu stiffens. 

He honestly hadn't even thought about that. The fact that he would be able to see Deku within himself overrides everything else for him. Though now that he’s back, he supposes he did have some sort of trust in Mind Fuck.

He was Deku’s friend after all, even if he wasn’t in their class when Deku died. Bakugou held some sort of resentment towards him at first because he was transferred in the year after Deku died. He saw it as the shitty teachers trying to replace Deku in the hero course.

He knew better, logically. He knew that Shinsou was already going to be in the hero course no matter what, Aizawa said, but that didn’t mean his grief-ridden mind didn’t make up stories.

“What trust?” Bakugou scoffs. “I don’t trust you.” 

Shinsou hums, still staring at him and he glares, becoming uncomfortable at the probing eyes.

“Wanna tell me what that was about?” Shinsou asks after a moment.

Bakugou glares harder but he knows he owes the other boy an explanation. No one would ever expect Bakugou Katsuki to walk into their office and demand to be brainwashed. There had to be something going on.

“Just wanted to see Deku is all,” Bakugou says nonchalantly, shrugging his shoulders and looking away. Before he does, however, he sees how Shinsou’s eyes widen.

“Does this have anything to do with that power he gave you?”

“Maybe.” Bakuogu stays silent after that.

Shinsou sighs after he must realize Bakugou wasn’t going to speak more on the topic of his borrowed power. “Did you see him then? Midoriya, I mean.”

Bakugou glances back and nods affirmation. 

Shinsou studies him again. “You’re not crying this time.”

Bakugou tenses and glares at him. “I don’t fucking cry.” He watches as Shinsou seems to physically bite his tongue to keep in his words and Bakugou raises a brow, challenging him. Shinsou wasn’t one to mince his words after all.

“I suppose you’ll get better now.” It wasn’t a question but Bakugou nods nonetheless.

He stands and Shinsou’s eyes follow his movements. “I’ll be fine now. I have things to do.” Unwillingly, a small smile slips onto his face and he exits the office, leaving a very confused Shinsou in his wake.

*  *  *

“Why are you doing this, Bakugou?” Kirishima asks as Bakugou stands around his desk that’s covered in blueprints.

Bakugou glances up at Kirishima once before focusing on his task again. He has a meeting with a constructor later. He needs to get this project underway ASAP. He’s not for sure how much time he has left.

“Just cause.” 

Kirishima steps further into his office, shutting the door behind him. “This isn’t “just cause.” You’ve thrown yourself into this project for the last few months. Why? What even is it are you doing? You haven’t told a soul since you took leave. Todoroki’s number one now because of it.”

Bakugou just shrugs as he looks over his finished project. He drew out the building himself. It took him a while, but he had to think of everything that would be needed to get this project underfoot.

“Bakugou,” Kirishima says again, making Bakuogu look up in frustration.

“Because I have to do this.”

“What is this?”

“A project.” Before Kirishima could ask any more questions, Bakugou hands him a blueprint with the project's name at the top in big letters.

“Vigilante Academy for the Quirkless? What?” Kirishima glances up at him in confusion. “Why are you doing this?”

“Why do you think?” Bakugou grabs a pencil and quickly erases something he doesn’t like on one of the blueprints before reconstructing it on the paper.

“There aren’t that many heroes left and you want to found a Quirkless Agency? I don’t know why.”

Bakugou pauses at that, not realizing that no one really knew Deku was originally quirkless. “Deku was quirkless.”

Kirishima blinks at that before confusion mares his features again. “What?”

“Deku was quirkless. He grew up that way. He didn’t have a quirk until UA. You know how I was back then. Why do you think I treated him so badly?”

“Because he was quirkless? You bullied Midoriya because he was quirkless?” The disapproval in Kirishima’s voice makes Bakugou roll his eyes. 

He knows how he treated Deku in the past and how messed up it was. They had talked it through before they got together. He was just thankful Midoriya had loved him no matter what through all of it.

“Yes and no. I had an inferiority complex when it came to him. Him, the quirkless loser who kept looking down on me and trying to save me and me, with my big ego as everyone praised and basically worshiped me. We had our issues and we worked them out. You and no one else gets to tell us how we should feel. He forgave me for what I did and I spent every day making it up to him until I let him die. This is my once last hurrah.”

A mirage of emotions crosses Kirishima’s face the words until they settle on suspicion with the last sentence. “What do you mean ‘One last hurrah,’ Bakugou?”

Bakugou looks back down at the papers, not acknowledging Kirishima’s question.

“Katsuki.”

Bakugou does look up at Kirishima’s use of his first name. It had been years since they graduated and never once have they used their first names. Bakugou realizes they could’ve, they were close enough for it, but he never bothered because he was so used to what he already called him.

He could tell Kirishima was serious by his word choice though. He sighs. He might as well tell the one person who’s been there for him for over a decade. “I’m dying Kiri.”

Kirishima freezes for a moment as he stares. “What?” It comes out as a whisper but Bakugou heard it nonetheless. 

“I”m dying. I don’t know when it will happen, but I’m definitely not living past forty.” Bakugou had researched the fourth user after his discussion with Deku and he realized that he probably wasn’t going to live any longer than him. In fact, he thought he might die sooner.

He had studied all the previous holders and their powers and came up with a theory. The better the quirk, the less time one has. He knew his quirk was amazing but right now, it was his death sentence. He couldn’t have been happier.

That’s why his hurry to finish this project was dire. He didn’t want to leave it for someone else to finish. He wanted to be the one to see it through. He wanted something he could tell Deku when he saw the nerd again. He wanted something that would make Deku proud of him.

If this succeeds, he feels like he could finally forgive himself for how he treated Deku in the past.

“You’re not—” Kirishima cuts himself off as he takes a seat in one of the chairs in front of Bakugou’s desk.

“No. I’ll probably die sooner honestly. That’s why I’m rushing this. I want to be the one to do this.”

Kirishima’s silent as Bakugou stares at him. “How are you dying?” Kirishima finally asks, looking up towards Bakuoug.

Bakugou shrugs and debates telling him. “My power. It’s overloading me.”

Kirishima’s eyes narrow. “You mean Midoriay’s power, don’t you? You’ve never told us about that.”

“And I’m not going to now. Just know that I’m not giving it up and nothing you say will change my mind.”

Kirishima seems to realize as his face turns defeated. “You’re wanting to die.”

Bakugou neither confirms nor denies once more and he continues to stare silently.

“You want to see him again and that’s why you’re keeping it. That way you won’t be killing yourself.” Suddenly, anger takes over Krishima’s expressions as he stands and fists the front of Bakugou’s shirt, pulling him across the desk almost.

Bakugou lets him because he knew his friend would be angry at the revelation. It won’t change his mind though.

“You bastard. You think you can take the easy way out? Leave all of us here to pick up the pieces you leave behind? Well, fuck no. I”m not doing it. You turn to somebody else for that shit. I’m not going to stand by idly and watch you die.” Kirishima shoves him away and stomps towards the door.

Bakugou should let him go. He knows he should, but he can’t stop himself from opening his mouth. “Kiri.” 

Kirishima pauses but doesn't turn around.

“I am going to die, Kiri. Everyone does. Death is inevitable. It all just depends on how it comes. Since Deku died… I haven’t been whole. Not really. I spent these last ten years mourning for him and it never went away. Not even once. No matter what I did. No matter who I hung out with. He was always there. In the back of my mind.

“I’d see his smile when I closed by eyes. Hear his laugh in a room full of people. He was always there but at the same time, he wasn’t. When I finally spoke to him again when Shinsou brainwashed me and I realized how I could die early, could see him early and that I wouldn’t have to live out this miserable life, I was so relieved. 

“I know I’m going to hurt everyone with my decision but you all won’t hurt the way I did. You’ll be able to move one. Live your lives to the fullest. You’ll be able to be happy. To forget. You’ll be able to do all the things I wasn’t able to.

“If I’m selfish for that, then I’m sorry. It’s not like I’m the one doing it myself, I’m just letting fate take hold. I want to be happy again. I want to see him again. I’m sorry you’re going to get hurt in the process but it’s not like I’m going to die tomorrow. I’ll have a few years at least, but not many.”

Kirishima turns to him slowly and Bakugou winces at the devastation there. He doesn’t say anything as he turns back around and leaves, slamming the office door behind him.

Bakugou knew Kirishima wouldn't accept it right away and that he’d need time. He also knows that Kirishima was going to tell everyone to try and talk him out of it.

Sighing, he turns his phone to silent as he goes back to work on his blueprints. He was going to get the project underway.

*  *  *

It was surprisingly easy to build a school but it was so difficult to get it approved. 

Since society became skeptical and lost hope in heroes, there weren’t many left. The people weren’t oppressed anymore by the quirk laws and society grew. As society grew, so did the villains. That’s why there are still some heroes left as the people needed a symbol. 

Quirks were still a big deal too and that was why Dynamight’s proposition was turned down at first. He had blown up before calming himself down and explaining how quirkless people could be no different than people without quirks.

That there had been plenty of heroes in the past with quirks that weren’t that powerful yet still made it to herohood because they at least had a quirk.

He argued that just because a person didn’t have a power, it didn’t mean they were useless. He made Shinsou an example. His quirk, brainwashing, would only work if the other person spoke. It was a very powerful quirk, but it had a major weakness. If Shinsou came across a villain couldn’t or wouldn’t speak, he couldn’t use his quirk. He was effectively quirkless yet he was still a hero.

He talked about many a time Shinsou managed to bring down stubborn villains that wouldn't talk or how he brought down machines because there were no other heroes present who could fight.

The government went silent at that and because this debate was being televised, society went into an uproar. So many people were on Dynamight’s side and eventually, the government had no other choice but to allow it.

So Dynamight made the first-ever Quirkless Academy. The purpose of it was to show hope to the younger generations and to show how even the quirkless could become heroes. 

UA was known at the Hero Academy and Dekiru is known as the Vigilante Academy. Bakugou made it to where to schools would work alongside each other in training the future generations.

Getting it up and running was another hassle. He had to formulate a schedule that would accommodate quirkless children. Had to find teachers. Had to find someone to run it. He himself couldn’t because he was still a hero.

At least, that’s what society was told. Only a select few knew of Bakugou’s disease as they were calling it. Mostly just his friends so they knew he couldn’t exactly run the operation for long.

Rounding up the quirkless children was surprisingly hard. It’s not that Bakugou expected a whole hoard, he knew being quirkless was rare and would continue to get rare, but still. 

The first student to submit their application had been a miracle. It was a boy who reminded Bakugou so much of Midoriya. He was quirkless and it was his third year of middle school. 

Bakugou cried the first time they met. The boy had told him how much Bakugou changed his life. That he spent it up until that point, a bullied underdog for being different, but now he was given a chance. Given an opportunity to be equal. 

Now, it was currently three years after the grand opening of the school, and after the first application was accepted, many more flooded in. It seemed that this school held the vast majority, if not all, of Japan’s quirkless students.

Bakugou had worried about discrimination which is why there were a few students with quirks mixed in as well to prove that the opportunity to become a hero wasn’t based on someone’s quirk but on who they are and how far their spirit goes.

Bakugou also had aged drastically over those last few years. His physical appearance was fine, it was the inside that was bad. All of his systems, especially his cardiovascular had aged and extraordinary rates. He knew his quirk would damage his body and end his life and it was drawing nearer and nearer.

When the doctors told him he didn’t have much time left, he turned over his school to Kirishima. Kirishima had refused at first, still angry at Bakugou but it died away as the years passed. 

He spent the last few days of his life surrounded by his friends and family. If someone had told a teenage him that this would be how he ended up, he would have laughed and exploded in anger.

Bakugou couldn’t help but think of how Deku would approve.

His mother and father were saddened but they weren’t told that it was his choice to go. They were told it was a terminal disease and that there was nothing to be done.

All Might had been devastated and Bakugou felt saddened and worried for his former teacher. As old as he was, Bakugou knew it had to have been hard on the old man to watch both of his students pass.

Bakugou had approached the subject of One For All after All Might found out and All Might had told him that it was his quirk to do with as he pleased. That the sole reason One For All even existed didn’t matter anymore as All For One was defeated years ago.

Bakugou had just nodded at that. He had thought about a successor over the years but he wasn’t for sure. This power would eventually be only a killing machine as fewer and fewer quirkless people were born. 

To give one of his quirkless students his power would be like telling them to their face that they weren’t good enough quirkless so he was giving them one. He didn’t want that. He wanted them to believe they could be anything they wanted quirks or not.

He eventually decided that it would go with him. It was the thing that tied him and Midoriya together after all. It was his lifeline.

He hadn’t seen Midoriya again after that time in Shinsou’s office. Yes, there were many times he was tempted to have Shinsou brainwash him again. To see Deku again, but he held off. He was going to accomplish what he wanted and make Midoriya proud and then see him.

He was never a religious person, not really, but there were some things he was certain of and one of those was that life didn’t end after death. He would see Midoriya again when he died and that was the happiest thought he had. 

Even as he said his goodbyes. 

He refused to die in a bed too. There was no way he was going out lying around everyone. No, no sir. When he thought he was going, he pointed out the most mentally stable person present and asked them to spar. Demanded more like. 

He always thought Kirishima had a good mental fortitude but he wasn’t going to ask his best friend to kill him. No, he pointed to that Icy Hot bastard and told him to meet Bakugou on the training grounds where no one would see them.

He, of course, told Todoroki that he wasn’t coming back from this fight and that if he couldn’t do it, he’d get someone else.

Bakugou pretended he didn’t see the way Todoroki flinched or the wave of sadness wash over his features at that. He had said his goodbyes earlier and even left a letter for everyone. Call him a sap, sure, but he knew that’s what everyone needed.

The fight with Todoroki didn’t last long as he felt his constraining heartbeat one last time. Luckily he got the last hit before he left and Todoroki watched stunned as he fell to his knees.

Bakugou wished he could apologize one last time to the half-and-half bastard because he knew that it took a lot for Todoroki to do what he did, but Bakugou was already gone. He was already seeing Midoriya.

*  *  *

“Are you okay, Kacchan?”

Bakugou looks up, the cold water surrounding him making a shiver go through him. Or at least, he blames that on the water as his ruby eyes connect with emerald ones.

Deku’s standing in front of him in all his teenage, hero-costumed glory, holding a hand out and looking worriedly down at Bakougu. The shining sun bounces off his green curls and his freckled face holds an innocent look.

Unwillingly tears spring to his eyes as he lets out a wet sob before reaching up and clasping that gloved hand. 

“I’m fine, Deku. Don’t you ever learn?”

Midoriya pulls him toward the river once he’s standing. They’re the same height roughly and it’s only then does Bakugou realize he’s the same age. “You had me worried.”

“I know.”

“You’re early.”

“I’m right on time.” Bakugou pauses a second. "I have something to tell you. You'll be so proud of me."

Deku stops once they’re on land, turning to Bakugou, engulfing him in a hug, and burying his face into Bakugou's chest. “I'm proud of everything you do Kacchan. Tell me later. For now, welcome home, Kacchan.”

Bakugou’s arms wrap around Midoriya’s warm body and he cries, kissing the top of that green mop. 

“I’m home, Deku.”