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Connor knows that he should say something, but he doesn’t know what. He can’t tell Oliver that it will be okay, because it won’t. And he also doesn’t want to believe it. That Oliver’s the one that’s positive while he’s negative. “No,” he says finally. “That can’t be right. They must have switched our tests or something.”
Oliver shakes his head. “This isn’t a bad movie, they didn’t switch the results.”
“Then it must be a false positive,” Connor insists. “There’s no way that you have it and I don’t. That’s just not possible.”
“I wasn’t a virgin when I met you, Connor, so yes it is possible,” Oliver replies with a frown. He wasn’t sure what reaction he was expecting from Connor, but it wasn’t denial.
“I know you weren’t,” Connor replies, before taking a long pause. “I’m going to kill him.”
“Kill who?” Oliver asks confused.
“Spatula guy,” Connor replies as though it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“No you’re not,” Oliver tells him, though part of him is grateful that Connor cares so much. “I don’t know who infected me.”
“If you had it before, I’d have it too,” Connor says. “Has to be him.”
“Not necessarily,” Oliver replies, though secretly he suspects that Connor is right. He’s never used condoms during oral sex with anyone, so if he’d gotten it from anyone else, Connor definitely would have been exposed.
“So what do we do next?” Connor asks. He knows he’s going to freak out about this later but right now Oliver needs him and he’s not going anywhere, which he’s also going to freak out about later.
“We? You don’t have to do anything,” Oliver says, more harshly than he intended. He doesn’t want Connor to leave, but he also doesn’t want obligation to be the only reason he stay.
“If you’re trying to get to me leave, stop now,” Connor replies. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Why?” Oliver asks. “Things just got a hell of a lot more complicated.”
“You’re my boyfriend and outside of family you’re the most important person to me.” Connor takes Oliver’s hands in his own. “I’m not going to run just because things got complicated. A few months ago, I probably would have, but not now.”
“What changed?”
“You,” Connor says with a smile, despite the situation. “You’re the first person that I’ve wanted more than just sex with since, well, the guy that broke my heart and turned me into a slut.”
“Thank you. For not running away.” Oliver leans in and kisses Connor chastely. “As for what we do next, I’m pretty that’s make a doctor’s appointment and then freak the fuck out until then.”
Connor laughs. “So we’re only allowed to freak out until the doctor’s appointment?”
“Fuck no,” Oliver replies. “But at least then I’ll know what I’m dealing with.”
“What we’re dealing with,” Connor corrects. “I can go with you if you want.”
“You’d really do that?” Oliver asks, surprised. Just because Connor wasn’t running away, didn’t mean Oliver was expecting him to be this involved.
“Of course. Just because I’m negative, doesn’t mean this doesn’t affect me too.”
“And you want to ask the doctor if we can still have sex.” At Connor’s guilty expression, Oliver laughs. “Don’t worry the same thing crossed my mind.”
“It would suck if we could never have sex again, but it’s not a deal breaker,” Connor responds.
“Wait Connor Walsh is willing to give up sex to be with a guy?” Oliver says, raising an eyebrow. “Should I start wondering who this impostor is and what he did with the real Connor?”
Connor smiles bashfully. “Sure, I like sex, but I like you more.”
Oliver smiles back. “That’s the best thing I’ve heard all day.”
“Yeah, I can imagine,” Connor replies. “Have you eaten? I can order something in unless you want to risk me burning your apartment down.”
“Oh god no, you stay out of my kitchen,” Oliver exclaims. “There’s this Ethiopian place I’ve been wanting to try. We could get that.”
“Ethiopian? How’d you hear about this place?”
“One of the many take-out menus under slipped under my door,” Oliver replies. “So I know they’ll deliver.”
“Let’s look at the menu and then I can call it in while you take a shower,” Connor says. “I’m sure it will make you feel better. Usually works for me.”
“That does actually sound like a good idea,” Oliver admits. “And my contacts are bothering me from crying, so I’ll probably switch to my glasses too.”
“Your glasses are hot,” Connor says with a leer.
“More like the nerdiest things ever,” Oliver argues as they head to the kitchen to look over the menu.
“Go. Shower,” Connor says, once they make their selections. “I’ll take care of ordering.”
Oliver’s usually not one for long showers, but for once he takes his time. And he does feel a lot better after. And the way that Connor tries to undress him with his eyes when he’s in sweats and his glasses, well that makes him feel normal for the first time since he found out he’s positive.
“Food should be here in about another ten minutes,” Connor says, pulling Oliver close and simply holding him.
“Part of me was expecting you to disappear while I was in the shower,” Oliver murmurs, taking comfort in being held.
“I may be an asshole, but I’m not that big of an asshole,” Connor replies. “I may vanish sometimes to go freak in the privacy of my own apartment, but I’ll always come back.”
“I’ve seen you in the middle of a full blown panic attack, it’s okay if you freak out on me. I’m know going to freak out on you more than once,” Oliver responds. The two just stand there, simply holding each other until there’s a knock on the door. Connor goes to get their food, while Oliver grabs them sodas from the fridge. They curl up together on the couch and eat dinner while watching mindless tv. Things aren’t going to be easy, but as long as they have each other, they’ll make it work.