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“But if they think we’re a couple, we’ll get the couples discount!” Shang Ling argued.
Shen Yuan rolled his eyes at the mousey man, "You lousy hack of an author, is your brain so full of papapa that you lost your memories?", he crossed his arms, giving his longtime friend an unimpressed look, "I think you might be forgetting something."
Shang Ling rolled his eyes in turn and raised his arms in a placating manner, "Oh right. Sorry, I forgot that you are a straight man. How could I forget that?"
The Shen sniffed and nodded, tapping at his phone. "Exactly. I'm not gay so I can't--"
"WHEN you, the straightest man on Earth, son of the fifth richest businessman in Shanghai, own a whole shrine dedicated to Luo Binghe full of limited merch that costs a fortune to collect. A totally normal and straight thing of you that just everyone owns. How could I have forgotten?" He cut him off and Shen Yuan's head shot up.
"Hey! It's not a shrine."
Shang Ling grabbed his keys and locked the office door behind him, falling into step besides Shen Yuan as they headed towards the elevator, raising his brow at the man and letting his silence speak for itself.
"It's not!" The man defended, "It's a collection. Normal people collect things they like all the time. Mine just happens to be the merch of a fictional character-- who is perfectly fine for me, a straight man, to like! He's so cool and strong, how could anyone not like him?" He nodded to himself as if he had to confirm it himself, "It's perfectly normal!"
Shang Ling gave a long-suffering sigh and patted the younger man's shoulder as they stepped into the elevator, "Right. Sure."
Shen Yuan lightly hit the other man's leg with his cane. "I don't want to hear this from you of all people, Shang Qinghua." The Shang sputtered, turning red.
"No. Nope. Shut up right now. Don't even."
The man continued, ignoring his friend's plight. "A self-insert in your own book. Really?"
Shang Ling covered his ears, "Lalalalala what are you saying, Cucumber? It seems I can't hear you!"
Shen Yuan deadpanned, and dragged the man out of the elevator by his hood, waving at the tired security guard as he left, the security guard who was too used to their antics at that point simply chuckled and waved back.
He continued when Shang Ling lowered his hands. "And you made him solely to serve your ideal man. Doesn't that seem pretty gay of you, Airplane?"
Shang Ling paused beside him and took the other man's hand, turning him to face himself, looking into his eyes with a serious expression. "Cucumber-bro. Shen Yuan. My dear A-Yuan."
"What?"
He dragged the words out. "I. Am. Gay."
"Oh."
The two stood still in silence besides the office building under the flickering light of a lamppost, still looking into each other's eyes. Forest green meeting deep brown equally in seriousness, locked in a stare until they both burst into laughter.
Shen Yuan wheezed, hitting Shang Ling's back as he choked and coughed on his own laughter, fondness filling his chest with a warm flush on his cheeks. Ah, he loved their moments like this.
They calmed down and Shang Ling wiped tears from eyes, cheeks still pleasantly flushed. He looked up at Shen Yuan with a wide grin. Shen Yuan's heart fluttered a bit and he dearly hoped that didn't mean he was on the cusp of a stroke or something. That would totally ruin the atmosphere.
"Oh right!" He clicked his tongue. "You distracted me from the question we were talking about before. Do you wanna go to that restaurant we were talking about or not? I'm hungry and it's," he checked his phone, "7:58 now. They close at 9. If we quickly take a taxi, we could get there by around 8:12... Hold on I'll get a taxi for us right now."
Shen Yuan shrugged. "Sure." He paused then squinted at him. "Still set on paying for that couples discount? I can just pay for it, you know. You don't have to."
The fact that Shen Yuan was loaded and the Shang was not was silently passed in between them.
"Don't worry about it. I'll pay!" Shang Ling said, "I want to treat you tonight!" He put a hand on his chest, cutting off Shen Yuan's protest, smiling bashfully. "Think of it as a treat for both of us then. The newest PIDW book and extras were a huge success with you on our team this past year, Cucumber-bro."
"We're the only ones in this team apart from my meimei, Airplane-bro."
"Yeah, so? We deserve to celebrate at least a little bit!"
"Fine. Are you sure you don't want me to pay though?"
Shang Ling groaned, "Yes. Stop being overly nice and worrying about my wallet, Cucumber-bro. I thought you were supposed to be my mean anti-fan, not an auntie at a family lunch meetup."
Seriously, the author thought to himself, what happened to the man with the scathing comments about anything and everything Shang Ling did?
"So you like it when I'm mean?"
"Yes!" He exclaimed.
Shen Yuan raised a brow, smiling when Shang Ling turned bright red.
"No. No! I mean yes but not like that! I mean--" he huffed at the Shen's laughter, cracking a smile of his own, eyes twinkling. "Fine, laugh it all off won't you? Haha. Very funny."
The two stood, relishing the comfortable silence between them, waiting for the taxi and watching the night bustle of cars and people pass by before Shen Yuan spoke,
"Fine, I guess we can pretend to be a couple for that discount."
Shang Qinghua looked at the other and tilted his head. "Why the sudden agreement? I'm glad, of course, and was going to do it anyways, but you changed your mind??"
The Shen looked away from the other and muttered something.
"What was that?"
He huffed. "Not only your brain is lacking in functionality but apparently your ears too." He looked at Shang Ling, brows furrowed. "I said I guess I wouldn't mind if it was you. You know, to pretend to be a couple with. I guess I'd date you if you were a girl too."
Shang Ling felt warmth flooding his chest. "Awww, A-Yuan!"
"Don't give me that! Remember I'm straight though. No homo and all." He snapped, though it had no heat behind it.
He waved off his words, "Of course you are, Cucumber-bro. Of course."
The taxi arrived and Shen Yuan took Shang Ling by the hand, refusing to look at him, face red,
"Let's go get that dinner I guess."