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Cold sweat runs down Yingxing’s spine as he darts up from bed, his chest heaving and his eyes burning. The room is quiet, save for the patter of rain against the windows and the soft breathing of his husband next to him. Yingxing’s heart races like the speed of light and he can’t hear anything else other than the roaring of blood in his ears. His hands are clammy and his mouth is cotton dry.
“Where is it?” Yingxing mutters to himself as he throws the blanket off of him, barely careful enough to not wake his sleeping spouse. “Where is it?”
Lavender eyes dart around the bedroom, his vision slowly adapting to the dark with only the aid of the moon shining in through the windows. He wanders around the room, trying to recall where Dan Feng had last left Cloud-Piercer before they went to bed but it’s not there.
“Where…”
Where is it?
Where did Dan Feng leave it?
Panic rises in his throat as Yingxing scours the room, silvery hair dancing wildly as he turns. Yingxing feels sick in his stomach and if he doesn’t see it–
A pair of cool hands cup his face and two thumbs stroke the skin under his eyes. He stares into a sharp, emerald gaze, no signs of sleep can be seen on his husband’s expression. Worry etches itself in his frown and stray strands of hair cling to his cheeks.
“Breathe,” Dan Feng commands. But Yingxing can’t breathe. Not when he doesn’t know where it is. Cloud-Piercer isn’t in his sight, did it really break? Is it gone? What happened? It’s supposed to accompany Dan Feng through all of his reincarnations and protect him. If any of his reincarnations continue to carry the Imbibitor Lunae’s line, then they’ll always be fighting. Always be going against someone. Fighting someone. Fighting some thing. What if one day they went up against an Aeon? If it broke, then Yingxing must–
“Yingxing.” Dan Feng says his name firmly, his hands sliding down to his shoulders. “Fujun. Look at me.”
Taking in a shaky breath, Yingxing meets Dan Feng’s gaze. The lump in his throat is hard to swallow, but he forces it. Trembling hands reach out to wrap around Dan Feng’s slender wrists. But instead of pulling Dan Feng into his arms, Yingxing pries them off of him and begins his search again, not noticing the pain in Dan Feng’s eyes.
“Yingxing–”
“Where is it, Dan Feng? Where is it?!”
“What are you looking for?” Dan Feng asks in confusion, folding his arms to hold himself as Yingxing paces around the room.
“Cloud-Piercer. Where is it? Did it break? What–”
Before he can finish, the room glows a bright turquoise and Cloud-Piercer materalised in Dan Feng’s hand. “It’s right here. Yingxing, what’s wrong–”
Yingxing all but rips Cloud-Piercer out of Dan Feng’s hold and begins inspecting it as much as he can in the dark. His fingers run across the blade of Cloud-Piercer, down its shaft right to where he recalls seeing it snap into two. Only when he feels nothing at all, no crack, no tear, does he allow himself to exhale the breath that’s he’s been holding back.
He slumps down onto the chair near him and he holds Cloud-Piercer close to his chest, cradling the weapon like it’s his most prized possession. No, it is his most prized possession. It’s supposed to follow Dan Feng for the rest of his life.
It can’t just snap like that.
It shouldn’t snap like that.
“Yingxing, will you tell me what’s wrong?”
The moonlight shines down on his husband and a twang of guilt eats at his heart. Dan Feng is lost and confused, and there’s a thin line of shock furrowed between his brows. His back is still straight and composed, and Dan Feng, despite all that he looks, demands an answer.
“I had a dream.” Yingxing croaks out, frowning at how dry his throat is. His hands are still trembling as he wraps his fingers around Cloud-Piercer. He forces himself to inhale deeply, to calm himself down. “I couldn’t see well, but there was a man with short, black hair wielding Cloud-Piercer.”
Dan Feng comes closer, kneeling down in front of his husband as he places his hands over Yingxing’s. “It might have been your reincarnation. I don’t know. He was fighting someone… Someone powerful. Someone god-like…” He pauses, squeezing his eyes shut. The image doesn’t stop haunting him. “You don’t understand. Cloud-Piercer cleanly broke into two.”
“It’s right here.” Dan Feng reassures, his hold on Yingxing tightening around Cloud-Piercer. “It’s still here with us after going through so many campaigns with me.”
“I…”
“Is the arrogant Furnace Master so uncertain about his own creations?”
That makes Yingxing’s eyes narrow and his chest to lighten up. He snorts, loosening his hold on his most beloved creation.
“It’s just a bad dream. Cloud-Piercer is fine and it’ll always stay by my side. If it breaks, I have you by my side, isn’t it?”
Yingxing frowns and shakes his head. Before he can say another word, though, Dan Feng pulls him to his feet. “Come back to bed now. You and I both have a long day tomorrow.”
Cloud-Piercer is taken away from Yingxing without much fight and Dan Feng dematerialises his weapon.
It is only when they’re both back under the blankets and Dan Feng is curled up against Yingxing, the mortal’s hold on the High Elder tight and possessive, does Dan Feng press a warm kiss to Yingxing’s cheek and wrap his tail around his waist. “I will always take good care of Cloud-Piercer and I know every single one of my reincarnations will do so too. I’ll make sure they do.”
Lavender eyes flutter close nervously as he pulls Dan Feng closer to him, burying his face into the crown of his husband’s hair. “I know.”
Dan Feng hasn’t seen his husband in two days.
Two.
It’s not a surprise considering how often Yingxing disappears into the forge to get work done, but it is concerning when Cloud-Piercer is not by his side. Yingxing had said he was going to borrow it for a while, and Dan Feng knew Yingxing wouldn’t be able to shake off that nightmare. He wasn’t going out that day, so he didn’t see any issues with handing Cloud-Piercer to its maker. If Yingxing wanted to take a look, Dan Feng wasn’t going to say no.
But it’s worrying now that he hasn’t seen his husband nor his weapon in two days.
Walking down the hallways of the Artisanship Commission, Dan Feng is greeted by the staff, most of them recognising him as the spouse of the Furnace Master. Those who are aware of the Furnace Master’s terrible habits do not try to stop the High Elder as he makes his way. There are some who stop to gawk at him, and then there are some higher positioned members of the Artisanship Commission who try to talk with him into convincing the Preceptors into agreeing something.
Dan Feng ignores them all.
He’s a man on a mission and he worries.
When he finds Yingxing’s forge, Dan Feng takes a steady breath. He can feel the eyes of the Artisanship Commission’s staff on him and he irks him. He throws them an icy cold glare and asks, “Do none of you have better things to do? Should the Furnace Master give you more work?”
His comment makes everyone scramble. A silence falls upon the courtyard of the forge and beyond the wooden doors, Dan Feng can hear the hammer against metal repeatedly knocking on it over and over again. The High Elder steels himself, words ready on his tongue. The moment he throws the doors to Yingxing’s forge open, he is greeted by wafts of smoke and finds his husband hunched over his work station, shirtless as he lowers the hammer back down on Cloud-Piercer.
“Yingxing.”
His name is cold and sharp on Dan Feng’s tongue but it barely makes his husband look up. “A-Feng, I’m a bit busy right now. Can you come back later?”
Whatever Dan Feng had on his tongue dies. He was ready to scold his husband but seeing his forehead crease with focus and his lavender eyes sharpen with determination, Dan Feng can’t help but feel himself deflate slightly.
Quietly, Dan Feng shuts the door behind him and he makes himself comfortable at the table where Yingxing had set up just for him when he visits. Yingxing doesn’t notice Dan Feng’s presence as he continues to work on Cloud-Piercer, resolved to strengthen its sheath and blade.
Dan Feng watches with worry as Yingxing pulls his arm back to bring the hammer back down on his weapon. That nightmare must have been a big blow to his husband.
“It’s got to be perfect,” Yingxing mutters to himself, wiping sweat off his temple. On any other day, Dan Feng’s mouth would have watered at the sight of his husband’s rippling muscles and sweat drenched chest. “It has to be perfect.”
He doesn’t understand. Cloud-Piercer is perfect. It has gone through so many campaigns with him, defeated so many Borisins and brought their enemies down to their knees. There’s no reason for it to break and Dan Feng will never allow it to break.
“It can’t break.” Yingxing whispers. “It has to accompany him and his reincarnations. It’s supposed to protect them.”
Oh.
Dan Feng gets up to his feet, his tail swaying lightly behind him as he closes the distance between him and his husband. Only when the hammer goes down on Cloud-Piercer does Dan Feng wrap his tail around Yingxing’s wrist. The hammer drops to the ground with a loud clank, startling both men in the forge. But Dan Feng ignores it in favour of placing both hands on his husband’s hips to turn him around.
“A-Feng? I thought you left–”
The High Elder shakes his head and stares straight into Yingxing’s eyes. Dark circles are prominent under Yingxing’s eyes and his lips are starting to crack. Not only did Yingxing neglect his sleep, he’s also been careless with his physical health. “You need sleep and water.”
“I’ll sleep when I’m done. Let me finish my work, A-Feng.”
Shaking his head, the High Elder raises himself on his toes and leans in to close the distance between their faces. Yingxing barely flinches from how close Dan Feng’s face is to his, but he does look quizzical. “A-Feng, the furnace is still burning. If you’re here for–”
Warm, smooth lips descend on warm, chapped lips softly and fingers dig harder into Yingxing’s hips. It’s true that more than often, when Dan Feng visits the forge, he ends up bent over by the Furnace Master on his work table and gets the best time of his life.
But today, it’s different.
Dan Feng kisses him softly, gently, as though his husband is the most fragile thing he’s ever held. He has never treated Yingxing like this. Yingxing releases a confused noise against Dan Feng but isn’t against being kissed like this. He melts into Dan Feng’s embrace and carefully wraps his own arms around his husband, careful to not dirty his robes.
Arms slide up Yingxing’s sweaty shoulders and drapes itself carelessly over his shoulders as Dan Feng presses himself against his husband, ignoring the way his sweat and grime will cling to his robes. Lips part and Dan Feng runs his tongue across Yingxing’s lower lip before meeting Yingxing’s. It’s a slow dance, careful and gentle, a reminder of their love for each other.
Dan Feng understands. He understands Yingxing’s worry and he can’t help the ache in his chest. He refuses to acknowledge it, but he knows that eventually, that day will come.
Their breaths exchange as they continue to kiss, none of them interested in deepening it. Dan Feng pours his reassurance into his kiss and Yingxing welcomes it, greedily taking whatever the High Elder can give. When they break apart, Dan Feng’s face is warm and Yingxing’s cheeks are flushed red.
“Yingxing,” Dan Feng begins firmly, gloved fingers intertwining with the silvery locks of white hair. “Cloud-Piercer will always be by my side, no matter what. It will keep following me wherever I choose to go.”
Yingxing laughs anxiously, his fingers drumming against Dan Feng’s hip. “I know. It’s meant to protect you and your reincarnations, remember?”
Dan Feng shakes his head, leaning in to press his lips against Yingxing’s cheek. He tastes the saltiness of sweat on his tongue but he doesn’t point that out. Instead, he asks, “Are you looking down on me and my reincarnations? Besides, didn’t it do its job? It broke but it protected whoever that reincarnation was. He must have been a bad spear-wielder.”
He feels Yingxing’s huff of sad laughter. “A-Feng. There will come a day where I will no longer be around and Cloud-Piercer will be the only thing left of me to protect you. I need it to protect you, baobei, even when I am gone. You have to take good care of it.”
An awful feeling begins to bubble in Dan Feng’s chest. This is the conversation he didn’t want to have, and yet it’s here. He doesn’t want to acknowledge the hanging doom that one day Yingxing will no longer be by his side. He doesn’t want to think that one day, he won’t be able to see Yingxing sitting by the courtyard polishing Cloud-Piercer because Dan Feng is too stubborn to do it himself.
Dan Feng lowers his head and presses his forehead against Yingxing’s shoulder and closes his eyes, his breaths shuddering. “Stop talking like that.”
“Oh, A-Feng.” Yingxing sighs, wrapping his arms tightly around Dan Feng. “This is why it’s so important for Cloud-Piercer to be able to withstand anything, even an Aeon.”
Shaking his head, Dan Feng squeezes his eyes shut tightly, his hands sliding down to cling to Yingxing’s front. “No.”
Yingxing sighs, kissing Dan Feng’s temple. “Baobei, when I am gone, this will be your reminder of me. Can’t you let me do this one thing?”
A small hiccup escapes Dan Feng and he stubbornly wills the tears and the thought of losing Yingxing away. “Only because you want it perfect.”
Yingxing hums, his lips lingering against Dan Feng’s skin. “I want it perfect so that you can have it for a very long time and be able to keep yourself safe.”
“When you’re done, you’re bringing me out for skewers and wine.”
A chuckle rumbles from deep inside Yingxing’s chest. “Yes, yes. Let me just finish the last of my work on Cloud-Piercer and I will buy you all the skewers you want.”
Dan Feng pulls away, his emerald gaze sliding over to his spear on the table and feels his heart begin to ache again.
Cloud-Piercer, a weapon created by the man who loves him the most and wants to keep him safe even when he’s long gone.
Swallowing his pride, Dan Feng eventually detaches from Yingxing, but not before he steals another kiss from his husband.
“I want Cloud-Piercer to be perfect.”
Yingxing grins. “Yes, baobei.”
Dan Heng stares in horror at the sight of Cloud-Piercer’s blade buried in the ground. His hold on the shaft is so tight his nails dig into his palms. Whatever remains of Cloud-Piercer trembles violently in Dan Heng’s hands.
“Dan Heng–” Stelle calls out to him, but he can’t hear anything else she says. All he hears is the devastated roar of a dragon and his heart feels like it’s been ripped apart. Cloud-Piercer has been by his side since he was in the Shackling Prison. It was his only tether back to Yingxing, the only thing that kept him safe throughout the years. It even protected him from its maker, a sin that Dan Heng will never be able to forgive himself for.
Cloud-Piercer and his bracer are the two things that plays a visceral role in allowing Dan Heng to remember his past. Cloud-Piercer is the one thing he holds dearly to his heart, the one thing he promised himself he’ll always take good care of. The bracer on his forearm burns as he goes through an intense grief, his fingers digging into his ribs at how anguished his chest is. He approaches the blade of Cloud-Piercer, his hands violently shaking as he drops to his knees with a loud thud. He pries it out of the ground, the glow of ‘Dan’ still shining brilliantly in the dark.
“I engraved ‘Dan’ in it because I want to have a say in the way your reincarnations name themselves in the future. They better remember who first held this before they take it for themselves. Dan Feng. My husband. And if they want to hold Cloud-Piercer, they better be able to name themselves with ‘Dan’ in it.”
“Yingxing…” Dan Heng whispers into the wind, his entire body wrecked in shock and disbelief. “Yingxing, I broke it.”
Forehead pressing against his knuckles, Dan Heng lowers his entire body to hold Cloud-Piercer that has since broken into two.
“Yingxing, I’m sorry.”
Ren is hesitant to board the express. He hasn’t been here in a very long time, and he’s not sure why he's been summoned here either. The brat only said that Stelle requested for his presence, and there wasn’t any other elaboration. The only reason he’s even willing to come on board was because he had felt the bracer sear through his arm a few system hours ago and he couldn't help but worry.
When he steps onto the Astral Express, he is greeted solemnly by Stelle and March. Their newest addition to the team and their navigator is nowhere to be seen.
“Dan Heng is in his room with Mr. Yang.” Stelle says.
March looks uneasy as she shifts from foot to foot. She scratches the back of her head and then continues, “But uh, please be forgiving. We didn’t expect we’d be going up against the inheritor of a titan’s powers.”
Ren is even more confused now but he says nothing. He gives them a swift nod and makes his way down the express, not liking how quiet the train is. Usually, the place is lively, with music playing in the background and the crew all gather around to do their own thing in the parlor. But there’s a heaviness that clings to the air and Ren isn’t sure what exactly it is that makes him uneasy.
He is a Stellaron Hunter, has kissed death multiple times, and faced many dangerous people throughout the years. But something about the walk to the Archives worries him. The closer he gets to Dan Heng’s room, the warmer his bracer feels and the more apprehensive he becomes. Stopping outside the Archives, he hears Welt Yang’s voice speaking inside, but there is no response to whoever the older man is speaking to.
The age-old mara begins to come to life under Ren’s skin as he thinks about what could have potentially happened. The door opens even before Ren can knock on it and he is greeted by Welt Yang. The man looks defeated and sad, but not surprised to see Ren standing there.
“Where is he?” Ren asks, peering over Welt Yang’s shoulder. He can’t see much inside the room with how dim the lighting is set, and he grows more concerned. Dan Heng has never allowed the Archives to be this dim.
“I’ll leave him to you. Please be gentle with him.”
Ren almost laughs. Gentle? Between the two of them, gentle is the ghost of the love between Yingxing and Dan Feng. With Ren and Dan Heng, there’s almost always bloodshed. He pushes pass Welt Yang to step into the room. When the door closes behind him with a soft hiss and click, he does a sweep across the Archives. Dan Heng, naturally, is in bed, but he is buried under his blankets like a ball. He catches the tail end of soft sniffles and alarm bells go off in his head.
Who has the audacity to make Dan Heng cry?
He stalks over to the makeshift bed and yanks off the blanket from Dan Heng, and freezes. Dan Heng’s teary emerald eyes are wide in shock from his actions but Ren is stunned at the sight of what his dragon is clinging to.
The mighty Cloud-Piercer is cleanly broken and pressed close to Dan Heng’s chest.
“Ren–”
A low growl bounces off the four walls of the Archives as Ren digests what he has just seen and there is a grief that belongs to a him from centuries ago that threatens to surface. The mara flares and Ren struggles to keep it contained.
How dare Dan Heng break Cloud-Piercer.
Who was he even fighting to have it broken?
After centuries of fighting, Cloud-Piercer finally broke. It even had the audacity to break when Ren wasn’t around.
Who was it? Who caused it to break? Ren wants to seek revenge on whoever did that–
A pair of warm hands cup Ren’s face and the man is forced to stare into Dan Heng’s sullen expression. His little dragon’s cheeks are stained with tear tracks and his eyes are puffy red, as though he hasn’t stopped crying since it broke. The warmth on his bracer flutters as he feels the mara begin to calm and be washed away by the gentleness of Cloudhymn.
Dan Heng’s fingers are trembling as he continues to hold Ren’s face in his hands.
“I’m sorry,” Dan Heng whispers. “I’m so sorry. I was careless and…”
Ren’s gaze darts over to where Cloud-Piercer lays uselessly and he can only bite back a scoff. Of course Yingxing’s creation would break. His Shard Sword is a perfect example of a weapon that is capable of shattering into pieces.
“Can… Can we mend it back?”
“Is that why you called me here?”
Dan Heng shakes his head, dropping his hands to his sides in shame. “No. I–”
“I can’t fix it, Dan Heng.”
Dan Heng’s eyes widen before words stumble out of his mouth. “Wait, why? What… But you… You made this.”
Ren clenches his hands tightly together into fists and is unable to hide the tremors. “I once told you that this… This spear is always meant to protect you, so you had to take good care of it.”
“I did–!” Dan Heng argues, guilt and sorrow written all over his face. “But…”
“We didn’t expect we’d be going up against the inheritor of a titan’s powers.”
His heart wrenches at the devastation on Dan Heng’s face. Ren has been on the receiving end of Cloud-Piercer so many times he has lost count and from the photos that Stelle has sent over, he knows how much the weapon means to Dan Heng.
The last he recalls hearing from Kafka, the Astral Express was visiting Amphoreus, a world that is unknown to most. Of course, Yingxing couldn’t have foreseen that.
But it cannot change the fact that Ren’s hands are no longer the same. He is no longer the talented Furnace Master of the Luofu. His hands are beyond ruined and he doesn’t have a furnace in the base.
This isn’t what Ren expected to greet him after not seeing Dan Heng since they parted ways on the Luofu. He didn’t expect that to break. He had made sure that it would have survived any attack. He sacrificed hours and hours of time to make sure it was perfect.
His biggest nightmare came true. But before anything else, Ren cups Dan Heng’s face, thumbs wiping away the tear stains and begins inspecting the man before him. Dan Heng hiccups and stares at him in confusion, pink lips parting in surprise. “What are you… What are you doing?”
This relationship between them is still so strained, so raw, he doesn’t know what to do. But what Ren knows is that the blazing heat from his bracer earlier today was grief. Dan Heng’s grief.
With his thumb and index finger, he grasps Dan Heng’s chin to turn his face from side to side, and makes sure that the man is okay before he asks, “Did you hurt yourself anywhere?”
Dan Heng shakes his head, his breaths heavy and weak.
“How careless of you, Imbibitor Lunae, to break the one thing that you hold most dear to yourself.”
Dan Heng flinches at the comment and drops his head in shame. He truly loves the weapon so much. Any other day, Dan Heng will have bitten back with a snarky remark. But he has no right to.
Taking pity on him, Ren picks up the two pieces of Cloud-Piercer. “I cannot promise it will be fixed. My hands are no longer the same after what Jingliu has done, but I will try.”
Dan Heng’s head snaps up in surprise, his eyes darting over to Ren’s bandaged hands. “Let me see your hands.”
Ren holds Cloud-Piercer closer to himself, feeling the familiarity of the weapon in his hands. It’s been so long since he properly held it and he feels the urge to smith surge forward. He shakes his head. “Bailu has seen my hands. They cannot be repaired.”
Agony is an old friend as Dan Heng slumps back down in defeat. Ren is unsure if it’s because of his hands or for the fact that Cloud-Piercer might not be able to return to its former glory. Regardless, Ren will try. He owes it to himself to try.
He rises to his feet and Dan Heng follows suit to walk him to the door. Ren hates how crushed he looks but there’s nothing he can do to ease those feelings of his. They’re not lovers, but they’re not friends. They hang onto the thin line that dangles between those feelings of theirs; a love that no longer belonged to them, but a love that they also cannot not deny.
Eventually, Ren shifts to hold Cloud-Piercer in one hand and grabs Dan Heng’s wrist to pull him into an awkward, loose embrace. Dan Heng is smushed against Ren’s chest, but he melts into the embrace despite how clumsy it is.
“I’m sorry.” Dan Heng murmurs into his chest, his arms going around his waist to gingerly hug Ren. The gesture is strange but welcomed. “I’m sorry.”
He’s apologising to the ghost of someone who will never return, and Ren isn’t sure if he’s ready to be able to accept that yet. But for now, he’ll allow Dan Heng to do so.
Deep down, Ren is still glad Dan Heng is safe and proud that Cloud-Piercer did its job in protecting its owner.
A week later, Dan Heng receives a huge parcel that Pom-pom has difficulty lunging into his room. It’s been an agonising week since Ren took his broken weapon away, and anxiety had been gnawing at him since.
He couldn’t forget the image of Ren’s trembling hands and his haunting words.
“My hands are no longer the same after what Jingliu has done, but I will try.”
Dan Heng knew that Jingliu tortured Yingxing. Turned Yingxing into nothing more than a weapon. Turned him into Ren. But he never imagined that she would be so selfish to take away the one thing Yingxing loved–his ability to craft.
He could only imagine the pain and agony that Ren went through when he realised it, and could only silently grieve in his room for the former Furnace Master, for the man who loved him so deeply that he created a weapon to keep him safe. He didn’t want to cause anymore pain to Ren, not after all these long, exhausting and gruesome years.
If Ren couldn’t repair Cloud-Piercer, then Dan Heng would seek out Amphoreus’s most talented craftmaster to see if they can repair it.
But it seemed like there was no need.
As Dan Heng ripped the parcel open, he was greeted to the sight of a fully repaired Cloud-Piercer. Gold lines where it had broken off, melted beautifully into the spear like… Like his dragon horns.
How…
A note flutters down to his feet and Dan Heng picks it up to read it.
Break it again and I’ll break the neck of whoever breaks it.
A bubble of laughter rises in Dan Heng’s throat as he holds Cloud-Piercer close to himself, relief washing through him. He wants to know how Ren did it, but knowing the Stellaron Hunter, he isn’t going to get an answer for a very long time.