Chapter Text
Everything happens for a reason. That was a quote sitting on the wall above Mr. Corkel’s whiteboard in AP English class. Evan saw this quote every single day in block 1 of his senior year. When you already know what university you’re going to and are about to be out of high school forever— you tend to stop listening to the lessons. So he had way too much time alone with his thoughts. He always came to the conclusion that this quote was rash. It was supposed to be motivational or comforting; stating that everything that ever happened is for a greater reason. Maybe everything happens for a reason, but not always for a good one. Not always for a fulfilling one.
Evan Rosier hated questioning real reason. Why did some things happen the way they did? What’s the thinking? And how could anyone think some things were for the better? But there was one thing he hated even more than that… that was change. This was also something there was always a reason for. He was currently going through a major change by transferring universities. Due to a chemical imbalance in his brain, he wasn’t happy where he was. As a result, his parents got tired and decided to let him choose where he was going to go this time, but it didn’t mean they had to be happy about it. Evan tried to explain that it wasn’t his environment— it was just him. He wasn’t happy anywhere, but his father never really heard him or even tried to. Mr. Rosier just responded in his perfectly condescending tone “a change is as good as something new and you’re getting both, so be fucking grateful.”
Evan felt like he was on the sidelines of his own life, waiting to be subbed in. But this wasn’t a football match— and someone else couldn’t tell him when to start playing.
Now he was sitting in his own melancholy and the passenger's seat of his father’s 1967 Marina Blue Chevrolet Camaro. He was sure his father loved it more than him. The car certainly got more attention from his father when he was growing up. They were driving to Durham. The university of his choosing. The choice was made for no reason other than that he got an offer to join the football team.
Evan would have preferred to drive himself. He probably would have rathered an escaped convict to drive him over Arthur Rosier, but his father insisted or persisted. Although not without reminding Evan that he should be grateful for the favour.
“Evan, the cost of this transfer came out of my pockets. I pray that you’ll take it seriously this time around, do you understand?”
“Mhm.” Evan answered shortly and entirely uninterested. Disinterest was the only thing he felt every time he was unfortunate enough to witness his father open his mouth.
“I mean it, boy.” His father said firmly, gripping the steering wheel more tightly than before.
“I know you do.” he replied quietly, he felt more than slightly annoyed but he knew better than to let it affect his tone.
Evan loved his father, but that wasn’t something he could help. He was born loving his dad— and just because he loved him— didn’t mean he had to like the man. He liked his mother, which often made him wonder why she ever decided to stay with Arthur. It’s not like his father was physically abusive, he was just always angry. His anger had been countlessly directed at Evan for a reason he never knew. His father relied on patronization or passive aggressiveness rather than becoming violent. So Evan guessed he preferred the former. He saw his parents like night and day. Complete opposites in a never ending cycle.
The rest of the car ride, was sat mostly in silence. His father only attempted to speak to Evan one more time, to which he lifted one side of his earphones just to give a short, curt reply before dropping it back down onto his ear and turning the music up.
Evan was never a person who believed in buying things for a reason other than necessity. He didn’t have much to move in the first place, but he had only a duffle bag now on account of his important belongings being moved by a van the day before.
He said a short goodbye to his father. His father, who didn’t even hug him farewell, just put a too-tight hand on Evan’s shoulder and told him, “Make me proud,” but they both knew that was never going to happen— Evan stopped trying a long time ago.
Evan had been here before on a short tour during his senior year of high school and again last spring, but with a school this size it didn’t matter. He was still lost and it would probably take him his last two years of school to solve this maze. It would help if he understood the papers he was given and knew where the “St. Aldwyn’s Court” building was. It would help even more if Evan had been good at asking for help, but he never had been. Instead he convinced himself he could do it on his own— he was wrong.
He had been walking around the campus for the better part of an hour looking for a map or anything really, without any luck. He felt like a dog chasing its own tail, but it wasn’t all bad. He got to witness how beautiful the place actually was… and Evan liked walking. It was one of the few things that cleared his head and gave him time to himself and Greg Gonzalez’s voice.
The campus was truly breathtaking and Evan couldn’t help but take it all in. He had long ago accepted his fate and continued walking around aimlessly, unaware of his surroundings, his head tilted up in awe. Which had been fine— until it wasn’t. Because he had been unknowingly on a collision course with another student walking in the opposite direction, looking at their phone screen.
“Oh shit- I’m so sorry.” He said quickly, holding out a hand to steady them and himself.
“Don’t worry about it, I played an equal part.” The girl replied with a soft smile before bending down to pick up her phone that was knocked to the ground. It had a bright green case and was covered in grunge and niche band stickers.
The girl had medium length bleach blonde hair and wore a lot of eyeliner. She had drawn on freckles, an alternative style, and lots of thrifted jewelry. The girl was different and objectively pretty, though she wasn’t Evan’s type. No girl ever seemed to be.
“Marlene McKinnon.” She stuck out her fingerlessly gloved hand, still wearing the same smile.
“Evan.” His reply came out awkwardly. He took her hand with hesitation. Evan had never been good at interacting with strangers, but she seemed easy enough to get along with.
“Are you lost, Evan?” Marlene questioned.
“Oh no- I- I mean yes, yes I am. Very lost.” He admitted laughing at himself.
“Here, let me see that.”
Marlene took the papers from his hands that had his housing and student information.
“Oh, we're in the same building!” She said with such cheer. “Do you want me to walk you there?”
“Yes… yes please.” He responded weakly and helplessly.
Evan had always been a quick learner. And he very quickly learned that this girl loved the sound of her own voice. She rambled and cut herself off, but Evan didn’t mind, he liked listening and hated talking so this arrangement worked perfectly for him. By the time they got to the other, the correct, side of campus Evan had learned everything about her and everyone in her life. He knew where she grew up, what her parents were like, who her friends were and what they got up to. She even talked briefly about her girlfriend, Dorcas, who also attended Durham.
He wasn’t exactly swimming in friendship so he never would have said this aloud, but part of him was grateful when Marlene showed him to his dorm and told him that she would see him around. He loved listening, but like anyone, he could only do it for so long— and he much preferred when things were quiet.
Evan opened the door to his new dorm and felt the cool air inside from the cracked open window. There were two beds. One was taken, but its occupant wasn’t in the room. He loved being alone. Most people find loneliness depressing, but Evan finds comfort in the quietness of it. For that reason he wasn’t thrilled at the idea of sharing a room with someone whom he had yet to meet.
He looked around at the few boxes placed on his bed and floor. Evan didn’t like most things and that definitely didn’t exclude unpacking. It was worse now that his morning Prozac motivation had worn off. He glanced around the room that was already half-complete. There were framed pictures on the walls and a dark blue bed-set on the bed to the right. Their closet door was not completely closed and there was a dark green zip up sweater that laid on the floor. It was clean for the most part and their bed was made, so he couldn’t complain. His curiosity started to get the better of him. As much as he loved being alone, Evan couldn’t help but wonder who he was sharing his room with. He had read online that someone’s room was a physical depiction of their mind. Evan tried to conjure a person based on the room’s conditions. He couldn’t get a clear idea, but he knew he would be meeting them soon anyway.
He unpacked the first box that sat on the hardwood floor. It was labelled “linens”. Evan figured he would feel more apt to unpack if he made his bed. He put his headphones back on his ears that had been resting around his neck. He proceeded to pull the bed-set out of the box one piece at a time. Evan was a strong believer that everything was better with music.
He succeeded in making his bed and continuing to unpack, all the while ignoring the big, red notification on his phone that reminded him to turn down his volume based on his headphone usage over the last seven days. He hung his sweaters in his closet and folded the others to fit in his drawers. His shoes found their place on the floor in his closet and his books on the nightstand.
Evan was in the middle of his final box, when he heard the door behind him open. He pulled his headphones back down.
“Oh, hey, you must be-” The person spoke first, but paused as Evan turned around to face them.
“Oh. It’s you.” Evan spoke out of complete disbelief, his eyes were wider than before and his mouth slightly ajar with unsaid words. They sat in silence for a moment, just looking at each other. Barty’s face could be put in the dictionary as an example of confusion.
“I’m just gonna grab something…” Barty said awkwardly, and it was easy for anyone to tell that he didn’t want to be there.
Evan’s eyes followed Barty as he walked around the room. He was searching his mind for something, anything to say to break the uncomfortable silence.
“RA, huh? Never took you for that type.” Evan managed to muster, reading the letters from the back of Barty’s shirt.
“Uh, yea, I guess I just did it to help my friends get away with stupid shit.” Barty’s back was still turned to Evan and he was searching around the room for something.
“That sounds about right.”
Silence followed once more.
“Been awhile.” Evan wasn’t sure why he kept talking, but for some reason this was the one silence he couldn’t stand.
“Uh-huh.”
“So-” was all Evan managed before he was cut off.
“Look, I’m really not interested in making small talk with you.” Barty said, slightly irritated, finally turning around to look at Evan.
Evan was taken aback by Barty’s bluntness. Not that he hadn’t experienced it before, but because he didn’t expect Barty to talk to him like this… not now at least.
“What-” Evan was cut off again.
“And I’m sorry, but there is no way in hell I’m sharing a dorm with you.”
“What the fuck did I do?” Evan was growing increasingly annoyed and angry. “In case I recall, you were the one who left without a fucking word?”
“Really?” Barty scoffed. “When was that? Our fucking senior year of high school?”
“It doesn’t matter when, you still did it, and it still hurt. And now you’re the one mad at me? For fucking what?”
Evan could tell there was something Barty wanted to say, but he bit his tongue and took a step away from Evan, before running a hand through his hair.
“You know what, just fuck off, and maybe we’ll make it through the semester.” Barty finally said before heading for the door, whatever he was looking for now in hand.
“Will do, dick.” Evan didn’t know it was possible for someone to piss him off so much in such a short amount of time. He never tried to have a short temper, but Barty seemed to be able to push buttons Evan didn’t even know he had. But he supposed Barty had always been that way. Barty turned Evan into his father’s son.
“Yeah, okay, just keep your distance.” Barty said in a mocking tone, getting the last word in before he slammed the door shut.
He left Evan standing there, still in major disbelief over what had just taken place.