Chapter Text
I need to get stronger. I need to beat that crazy masochist.
That's what Zanka thought when he was tearing up and absolutely destroying the training dummy with assistaff. It was getting late and how long has he been training for?...2 hours mabey 3? He's lost track of time and oh boy did his back ache.
"Just a bit longer...then I'll rest..." he mumbled to himself breathing heavily and wiping the sweat of his forehead with the back of his hand then aimed his staff at the dummy. "-anka!" He paused mid swing to turn around and see a red head with green eyes. Riyo.
"You've been training too long and it's getting late" she shouted from afar then she started walking towards him. She didn't look mad just that calm smile like always "let's go ill walk you to ya room incase you don't pass out on the way."
"Ah right...thanks Riyo" Zanka said now walking with her to his room. Damn how long did he train for it's already dark outside and everything hurt.
Oh shit. His wrists were stinging and he just realised now that the fresh cuts from the night before reopened. What if there was blood soaked through his sleeves...dammit he can't look now Riyo will notice.
He moved his hands behind his back and prayed that nobody will notice anything off about him. Did he go too deep? Should he have wrapped it up better? Why did he do it in the first place?
"Earth to Zanka?!" Riyo said nudging him in the shoulder. He snapped back to reality and turned his head to Riyo "sorry I'm just tired" He tried to smile at Riyo but failed awfully "yeah I wonder why..." she sarcastically spoke with a small grin on her face "but seriously get some sleep man we've got a mission tomorrow."
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In his room he sat on his bed and he knew that Riyo will notice something. She always does.
Oh, his wrists. Luckily there was no blood soaked through his jacket but there was blood all over his undershirt and it's bad.
"Fuck...i did go too deep...pathetic" he mumbled. He needed bandages so he looked in his desk draw and there were old bloodied bandages that stunk "ew gross..." it just shows how often he does it.
His wrists were stinging like crazy now making his hands shake. He couldn't risk an infection because that means everyone would find out...it means everyone will think he's weak, weaker.
The infirmary that's were he needed to go. He put his jacket back on and made his way while surpresing the pain.
On the way he was questioning what will happen if someone saw. He would hate it if Enjin saw, his idol, his mentor and his father figure finding out that he does this to himself simply because hes not strong enough. Enjin will most likely think he is pitiful and inadequate...he will never look at Zanka the same.
Not to mention he will never be strong to defeat that poison obsessed freak, what was his name again? Jabber how could he forget, the raider that always chooses him to test his poisons on. Zanka hates him...no loaths him because Jabber is the reason why he stays up at night knowing he can't defeat him and he will always be a failure.
He opened the door and a strong sent of antiseptic hit him aswell as bright lights blinding him. He stepped inside and made his way to Eishia, the nurse.
Eishia was a shy girl with her short, blonde hair and large nurse cap. "Oh hello Zanka...can I help you?" She quietly spoke clutching her clipboard.
"Im just wondering if I can have some bandages" he said calmly hoping not to worry her. She nodded and handed him a roll "thank you..." Zanka smiled and walked away with a sigh of relief. Thank goodness she didnt ask questions if so he would've been so cooked.
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Eishia smiled as she watched Zanka walk away. As much as she worried she didnt ask questions because he already looked like he was gonna throw up because of how nervous he was.
She looked down at her clip board to check her to-do list which was infact very organised but she noticed something on the floor. Blood and a small pool of it about the size of a coin, it wasn't alot but it was enough to worry her especially because that's were Zanka stood a few seconds before. "Oh...oh no..." she said not knowing what to do, pacing back and fourth for a few minutes, panicking.
She should probably tell someone, someone close to Zanka like "Riyo!" She said then putting her clipboard down and ran towards Riyo's room.
Eishia trusted Riyo alot and her stomach gets butterflies just thinking about her. After a few minutes she's outside of Riyo's room and panting since she ran here. *knock knock* "Riyo...can I talk with you?..." Riyo opened the door and went red at the sight of Eishia "Hey girl of course!"
The nurse started fidgeting with her vital instrument which was wrapped around her neck and she was sweating bullets because of how nervous she was. "I-is Zanka okay?" She said not dareing to look at Riyo.
Riyo's heart sank this isn't good she thought to herself "well he overworked himself in training today but I told him to stop -Eishia what happened!?" The red head was ready to run down and check on Zanka right now.
"He came to me for bandages, i didnt ask questions but when he left i noticed blood on the floor were he was and i panicked then came here...I'm sorry I didnt know what to do-" Riyo cut her off "no I'm glad you told me...shit...we gotta check on Zanka now..."
They ran and luckily his room was only a few doors down. "Zanka!" Riyo said knocking on his door "is everything alright?" She said with her hand tightly on the doorknob and a worried look plasterd on her face. Eishia caught up with Riyo a few seconds later, out of breath.
"Riyo?...d-dont come in...everything's fine" his voice was weak and hoarse "bullshit" Riyo said opening his door "Zanka I'm worried-"
Zanka was sitting on the edge of his bed with blood soaked sleeves, shaking hands and half of his arms were poorly wrapped in bandages. The half that wasn't wrapped had deep cuts that look too straight and perfect lines to be an accident.
Tears filled Zankas eyes "n-no Riyo don't!..."
Zanka was ready for anything, shouting, getting hit, being called weak and pathetic because that's was his sister, Kyouka, did when she found him like this back when Zanka was only 15.
Instead he felt arms gently wrap around him "Oh Zanka..." Riyo was on the brink of tears. Eishia was at the door with her hands covering her mouth in shock then pulling out antiseptic wipes heading towards Zanka.
Tears were falling down Zankas face as he watched the nusre take care of his wounds. Oh no they know now...they probably think hes a failure for this "im sorry for being so weak..." his voice cracked "your not weak...your one of the strongest people I know..." Riyo sobbed still hugging Zanka from the side.
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Later that night at almost 3am he couldn't sleep so he decided to take a walk to a near by night market to keep his mind distracted from earlier events.
This didnt turn out well for him...
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"Zankaaaaa" Enjin called outside Zankas door for the billionth time this morning. "Come on were late for our mission if you don't answer now I'm coming in myself!" No answer. "i swear to God if your-"
Gone. Zanka was gone and his window wide open "Zanka you son of a bitch..."