crashqueen



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    unconnected hollanov/heated rivalry fics all by the same author (it's me, i'm the author) // blanket permission for translations (posted on ao3/linked), podfics (posted on ao3/linked), art of any kind inspired by the fics in this collection! i would love to know about them though

    Words:
    213,993
    Works:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    3,461

    14 Mar 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “This is hard to talk about,” is all he says, though he knows it will amount to nothing.

    Shane’s fingertips are feather-soft on his chest. “You have to.”

    He has to, because Shane and Ilya have this thing, now, this agreement. Nothing is too hard to talk about. Nothing is off limits. They have to be bare, have to surrender the deepest crevice of their soul to one another. And Ilya, for whom this is easier said than done, whose chest carries a perpetual weight, an immovable mass, it’s all worth it – worth the relief smoothing over Shane’s features, the reassurance that he’s not worried anymore, that Ilya can give him this peace, albeit only a fragment of what Shane gives him by just being there when he wakes up. He would never say it, but he thinks that what he has to offer to Shane amounts to nothing – nothing compared to what Shane does, what Shane is, by simply nuzzling into his chest and sighing into his sleep, late at night when all Ilya can do is lay awake and just feel.

    “I need more,” Ilya says. “And is nothing you can do. I need you inside me, and it feels terrible.” He swallows, with great difficulty. God. “I need to– I need to eat you.”

    or, Ilya never knew love can hurt this good

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,537
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    158
    Kudos:
    3,377
    Bookmarks:
    775
    Hits:
    23,139

    01 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane had spent time—a lot of time, really—thinking about retirement. It came with the territory; on average, hockey players retired in their 30s, with a few outliers playing into their 40s. The really good ones got maybe three decades out of it all before putting the stick down and hanging the jersey up. In his mind, Shane liked to think he’d be one of them, playing till he hit forty-five, ending on some high note—the Centaurs winning their nth or so Cup, maybe—before fading, slowly, into the background.

    It turned out it would all just end in a random game, with a random team, boom— all so definitively over that Shane was left falling, completely flailing, clueless about any next step.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,883
    Chapters:
    3/4
    Comments:
    301
    Kudos:
    1,149
    Bookmarks:
    658
    Hits:
    42,761

    25 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 7

    Mystery Work

    Part of haru's private fic repository
    Summary

    This is part of an ongoing challenge and will be revealed soon!

    24 Jan 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The picturesque village of Buell, Maine is one of the last in the United States to continue the tradition of the “harvest” or “prosperity” lottery. Its residents insist the lottery makes them stronger, even as condemnation from outsiders grows.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,082
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    679
    Kudos:
    9,472
    Bookmarks:
    1,540
    Hits:
    73,076

    24 Jan 2026