Chapter Text
Aaron reckons, that he'll never forget that call in the middle of the night. And he is very very certain, that he'll also never forget that night. The day, the hour, the minute. Because after hanging up the phone, he was looking at his cell's screen, numbly and absolutely devasteted. Well, until Liv kicked his shin and he had to look up at her, realizing that he was crying.
He will never forget the frantic look on his sister's face as he startled, jumped up and ran into their room (yeah they had to share a room at Sandra's) to start packing. Liv following, now really scared.
'Aaron...? Aaron?! What is it...? Is it... is it Rob? Please Aaron, STOP!'
She is all but screaming out the STOP and that actually made Aaron stop. He drags his palm down his face, wiping away the tears and collapses into the armchair.
'Yes.' he breathes. 'Yes, it's Rob. I mean, mum... mum called...' his voice breaks down and he has to take another shaky breath.
'Is... is he...' she cannot say the words, but Aaron understands. Kind of snaps out of his panic mode, and gets into the big-brother / responsible adult mode.
'No! No, he is alive, Liv.'
Good. His voice is steady. Unwavering. He finally is able to look at Liv. She is crying.
'But...?'
'But that idiot is in the hospital. Mum said we should go home. That he had... that he had...' he breaks a bit again, but knows that he has to say it. 'He had a seizure. Afteraffects of the carbon monoxide poisoning.'
Liv's eyes are big and round and full of fear. She so clearly loves Robert. That idiot. Who still thinks Liv still only "kinda likes" him.
Aaron needs to pull his shit together. They need to get back as soon as possible. He gets up, with purpose in his eyes, hugs her sister, gives a sloppy kiss on her forehead and sends her packing with a softly murmured 'Rob needs us, let's get going eh?'
And if he cries more while stuffing his clothes into his bag, than no one needs to know.
********
Aaron needs to hold onto some normalcy, to be able to breathe. Robert looks so un-Robert like. Hair flat and messy against his pale skin, eyes closed, unmoving. Aaron gets up from the bedside chair, like in slow motion, and reaches for Robert's hair. Normalcy. Robert's hair needs to be artfully, messily constructed, all spikes and gel. He reaches for Robert's hair and starts messing it up, soft fingers and caresses. God he loves that hair. That man.
He belatedy realizes that those damned tears are freely flowing again. Robert's hair is all messed up now, but he is still unnaturally pale and Aaron needs to take a few steadying breaths.
Liv just stepped out to get some coffee and something Aaron could "stuff in his face" because he has not eaten ever since they arrived back yesterday. She cannot see how much of a mess Aaron is. Liv needs him. She refused to leave with Chas who left not long ago to take a shower and grab some nap.
Robert has been awake a few times since they arrived, but he is slipping in and out of a coma-sort of state. The doctors mentioned epilepsy. That it might happen again. The seizure. But more tests need to be done first. And time. Time will tell. They also said, Robert might have memory issues, but it was early to tell. Yet. But he will recover. Otherwise it's too early for a diagnosis.
Aaron leans over Robert's hospital bed, his lips softly brushing against that freckled skin he loves so much. He needs Robert to be OK. To see that smile that lit up everything around them like the sun after a heavy summer rain, and that fills Aaron's heart with warmth and life. Not that he'd ever say that out loud of course. But he needs that smile back, that gaze upon him, telling him without words, how beloved he is. By Robert.
Aaron needs that smile in those eyes, the sparkles. But his mind is filled with other images. The hazy, confused and terrified eyes of Robert when he first woke up. How he frantically kept looking around, his gaze stopping on Aaron finally, full with fear and desparation. It almost broke him. But that was not an option.
Aaron still cannot fathom, how he was able to grin so big and happy and looking all carefree. But he's managed.
It helped. Robert's eyes cleared up a bit.
'Aaron...' he breathed out softly, a gentle upwards tilt to his pretty, kissable full lips. 'Wha... what happened?'
'Besides you not making good on your prmise of taking care of yourself and landing in a hospital again? Well, not much.'
Robert actually cringed a little, but his eyes started to lose focus. Oh, no. Aaron needed him to stay there.
'How about you don't make a habit out of getting into trouble when I am not around eh? I mean really? It has been what, a month?'
Good. Robert's eyes re-focused a bit, and he actually huffed.
'Yeah... Sorry for that...'
Idiot. "Sorry". Just like that. Aaron couldn't do much more than shake his head and softly kiss him on the lips. Those lips. That smile. "Please Rob, please. Shine that smile again" pleaded Aaron silently.
By the time he detached his lips from Robert's however, those eyes were closed again, and Robert slipped away again.
And Aaron needs that smile back. The smile that tells him how fiercely and all consumingly Robert is in love with him. And he tells him so. Just as fiercely, many times repeating 'I need you Rob. Please stay with me'
'I need you. I love you.'
****************
By the time Robert is out of his "Wonderland" Aaron is a wreck. He barely slept or eaten for days, left the hospital only once, after getting blackmailed by Liv and Chaz (those woman were outright scary if they decided to gang up and Aaron did not like being on the receiving end at all, so he relented).
But Robert is out and up, though a bit confused sometimes. The doctors recon, it's completely normal and that it should fade soon.
For the first time in so many days, Aaron feels like he can breathe. Victoria came by earlier and fixed Robert's hair, though Robert kept protesting. Aaron just swatted his hands away, kissed him mute. After that, Robert silently endured Vic's administrations, while occasionally glaring around. Yeah, Aaron might have grinned like a lunatic at some point. Robert Jacob Sugden, king of cocky being adorable. Who'd have thought?
Still, Aaron is a wreck, that is why he starts his blabbering soon after they are left alone in the room. The words just start pouring and he cannot seem to stop them, just like the tears that accompany them.
'You scared the shit out of me you asshole. How dare you? You promised, Rob, you promised to take care of yourself. Do you have any idea how much I need you? How much I love you? How much Liv loves you, you fucking idiot. You better make good on your promise to fucking marry me or I swear to God I'll... I'll...'
Aaron chokes on his last words a bit, he cannot say it. Too close to home, too soon. He angrily wipes his face and looks at his stupid fuck of a fiancé. Ok, he might be glaring. Defiantly. Just to spite those damned tears. And his words. And maybe just a little bit to compensate for the breakdown. Again. Yeah, Aaron Dingle is classy like that. Grump is an amazing weapon. A weapon, that apparently does not work on Robert.
Because Robert looks at him, like always, really looks at him, and Aaron is sure that Robert can see him. All of him.
And then Robert's eyes soften, and there is a spark in them. The one Aaron knows so well. So intimately. It's reserved for him. The spark that is the telltale for Aaron, that is in for a treat. The sunsmile.
(Yeah, sue him, he named it. It's his secret).
And Aaron just needs to kiss him. So he does.