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Is this a new beginning or the start of another end?

Summary:

Each time she enters a town, she has a brief but sudden, lurching feeling that something is wrong, that there's too much color and not enough life. Each time she passes a mirror, she has a moment where she does not recognize her own face, where she expects the cold surface of a mask and the slight peek of blonde out from a dark, hastily pulled up hood.

 

After the Calamity, the Warrior of Light emerges from the aetherial rift with hundreds of years of Azem's memories.

Notes:

Title from "I Knew You When" by Marianas Trench.

Chapter 1

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Technically, she was born Reina Hyland, youngest daughter of two farmers, who had left home to explore the world the moment she was old enough in an effort to escape the fate of continuing the family business.

When asked, she gives the name Eirene, and offers no surname or further clarification. It's no matter; those farmers do not remember Reina Hyland. Some days, Eirene feels like she hardly remembers Reina Hyland.

What feels like days ago, Reina had been in the thick of a battle for the fate of the star, as the lesser moon grew closer and closer to crashing into them and destroying everything she was trying so desperately to protect.

And then Eirene had opened her eyes to a world forever changed by the events of that Calamity - five years in the future and with too many memories in her head.

It's been a few days since that awakening, and she's done her best to adjust - got herself some work in the mostly-familiar town of Limsa Lominsa, smiled through the complete lack of recognition on the faces of everyone she'd once known, listened patiently to their explanations, and tried not to think about the world she'd come from, both five years ago and long before that.

It's harder than she expects. Each time she enters a town, she has a brief but sudden, lurching feeling that something is wrong, that there's too much color and not enough life. Each time she passes a mirror, she has a moment where she does not recognize her own face, where she expects the cold surface of a mask and the slight peek of blonde out from a dark, hastily pulled up hood.

And each time, she throws herself further into trying to help the people around her instead of letting herself dwell on any of it.

Traveling is what she does best, after all.

*

She picks up odd jobs around Limsa until she has enough coin to purchase a one-way trip out of the city and away from its hauntingly familiar alleys and bridges. Soon enough, she's stepping out into the wholly unfamiliar woods of the Black Shroud.

Gridania itself is almost unrecognizable, rebuilt in the wake of a calamity that doesn’t feel long enough ago for such a major transformation to have occurred – the complete opposite of what she’d been trying to flee in Limsa Lominsa. And that would be perfect, but the judgmental staring of the populace as she looks for work sets her off, and eventually, she finds herself heading out to find a smaller town instead. With any luck, she’ll find somewhere she can temporarily settle in to try and figure out what her plan is in this world that does not remember her and that she barely recognizes.

Not far outside of Gridania, a guard outside a military camp suggests she continue along the road until she reaches a settlement he assures her is nearby. She takes his advice, and is coming up on a building – a bower, it looks like – a few minutes later when she hears a shout from further down the path. Without really thinking about it, she takes off, passing the concerned loggers who have stopped their work to try and find the source of the scream and soon enough comes up on crumbling stone ruins and several injured Wood Wailers.

"What's happened?" she asks, hurrying over to one of them with intent to heal and faltering when her magick does not immediately come to life on her palm.

Right.

"It was an ambush - the Hearer and the others, they're still inside—" The Wood Wailer chokes on his own words, but the gist is enough.

"I will help. Do you know what you were ambushed by?" she asks, quickly standing up.

"Some sort of shadow," the man says, shaking his head. "That sounds mad, but—"

Eirene cuts him off. "Stay here. I will be back as soon as I can."

With that, she heads off towards the ruins.

The stone pathways of the winding dungeon ruins eventually lead her out into a large room with a tree growing through its center, where a man she assumes is the Hearer is unconscious – hopefully only unconscious – with a shadowy, robed figure standing above them. The figure turns, and – that mask...

"How—"

She doesn't get the words out before the man is summoning a Golem with magick that is achingly familiar to Eirene, but she has no chance to dwell on that, as the Golem immediately spots its prey and attacks.

She dives out of the way, drawing her sword and cursing softly as she grips it. It feels unbalanced, and she feels untrained in its use despite several years of experience from before her five-year nap. She tries to sink back into Reina's memories, to let those muscles take over and strike down her foe without the interference of hundreds of years of memories of a different sword, of sparks of magick and—

The golem clips her in the side with a blast of stone and she shouts in pain, skidding backwards. She needs to focus.

She dives back in, stumbling only slightly as her sword moves differently than she expects, but eventually finds a rhythm. Before long, the Golem falls, crumbles, leaving her face to face with the robed man in the mask, but before Eirene can ask a question or demand an explanation, he mumbles something to himself and vanishes entirely from sight, leaving her with an unconscious Hearer and a pile of stones that used to be a Golem.

"He escaped again!" A voice whines from behind her, and Eirene turns as she sheathes her sword to see two people run into the center of the dungeon. One of them, clearly a mage, darts over to the unconscious Hearer, so Eirene steps back to give him some space.

"Oh, you're a new face," the other one says, and Eirene turns to see a very different mask that she immediately recognizes.

"Yda?" the name slips from her mouth before she can stop it.

Yda frowns, cocking her head. "That's me. Have we met?"

Eirene swallows, shaking her head and not offering further explanation before turning to the Lalafell man - Papalymo? - and the Hearer. "Is he alright?"

"He's only dazed. He'll survive," the Lalafell says, standing up and brushing off his clothes. "I see you made quick work of that Golem - impressive."

Eirene just shakes her head again.

"That's Papalymo," Yda says, gesturing over at the Lalafell. "And you apparently know my name. And you are?"

"Eirene," she introduces herself, nodding at them. "I was passing by when I heard the commotion."

"Well, our thanks for stepping in," Yda smiles.

Eirene nods. "We need to get him to safety, and—"

She cuts off, head suddenly swimming, and she stumbles as she faintly, distantly hears someone call her name.

And then she hears a different, more familiar voice.

Hear, feel, think.

It's not the first time Eirene has heard the voice in her head, but this is the first time since awakening that the pressure that accompanies it overwhelms her. She gasps as her vision goes white, and as it slowly fades back in, she finds herself staring down a giant, towering crystal.

And then she hears the voice again, and this time she places it.

"I am Hydaelyn. All made one."

She exhales, almost relieved. "Venat."

"Once," Hydaelyn agrees.

"What happened?" she demands. "How—"

"All is as it is meant to be," Hydaelyn speaks again, sounding so much like Eirene's mentor that it physically pains her. "The answers to your questions will come in time."

So, so much like Venat. She opens her mouth to protest, to try and force her mentor to give her the answers she's missing, but Hydaelyn speaks again before she has a chance to.

"This world may not be as you remember, but your duty to it is as it ever has been, a fragment of yourself or not."

Eirene startles at that. "A fragment? What do you—" And then it hits her all at once. "The sundering. You planned to summon Hydaelyn to sunder the world, and you managed, and now—"

"The balance of this world and its reflections is at risk, and my power wanes with each passing day," Hydaelyn says, cutting her off before she can continue. "As you always have, seek out those who need the help you can provide, and in doing so, you will find the answers that you seek. But for now, my dearest Azem, it is time for you to return.” 

It's as much of a dismissal as she’d ever received from Venat, but still, Eirene tries to protest. "Venat, wait—"

But it's no use. Her vision goes white again, and when she blinks her eyes open, she's laying on the ground, staring up at tree branches and a night sky that's glimmering with stars.

"Ah, you're awake!" Yda's mask enters her vision, her smile beaming. "We were pretty worried when you suddenly collapsed like that, are you alright?" She doesn't actually give Eirene a chance to answer before she continues speaking. "Papalymo said it must have been a surfeit of aether - especially considering you'd been fine just a moment before, but—"

"Yes, I’m okay" Eirene cuts her off. “Apologies."

Yda just grins at her again, offering a hand to help her up. “Papalymo’s filling in the Wood Wailers,” she gestures. “The Hearer’s okay, and they’re going to send someone else to finish the ritual.”

What ritual? Eirene doesn’t ask, and Yda doesn’t offer the information.

“You really do seem so familiar, are you sure we haven’t met before?” Yda asks her after a brief moment of silence.

Eirene just shrugs at her. “I should be going, sorry for the trouble.”

“Oh, hush,” Yda insists. “No trouble at all – thank you for your help. You sure you can’t wait until Papalymo’s finished? We’d like to hear your account of the events, if you’re willing. We’re here surveying the Twelveswood for—” she cuts herself off, “Well, never mind who for, but—”

“That’s quite enough, Yda,” Papalymo cuts her off, walking up to the two of them and nodding at Eirene while ignoring Yda's indignant protest. “Good to see you on your feet – how are you feeling?”

“I’m fine,” she insists. “Thank you for your assistance.”

“Of course,” Papalymo assures her. “Despite her rambling, Yda has the right of it – we would like to hear your account of what occurred before we arrived, if you’re willing to give it.”

Eirene frowns. “There’s not much to tell,” she says, honestly. “I heard the commotion as I was passing by the area and investigated and offered to help. When I arrived, the Hearer was already unconscious, and the robed man summoned the Golem.”

“The robed man,” Papalymo says, frowning. “I see.”

Eirene’s frown deepens. "Do you know who he was?" She asks carefully. As desperate as she is to learn more about those oh-so-familiar robes and masks, the last thing she wants to do is push them too far and learn nothing.

"Not in so many words," Papalymo shakes his head. "But we have our theories. We've been chasing this one for some time, but keep missing him."

Not as much of an explanation as Eirene would have liked, but probably all she's getting. She nods. "Well, thank you for your assistance after I..." she trails off, and Papalymo simply nods. "I should be going."

"You're an adventurer, right?" Yda asks her. She nods - close enough. "Last I heard, they were looking for some help down by the Hawthorne Hut in the East Shroud, if you're looking for work."

Eirene offers a smile. "Thanks for the tip, I'll check it out. Nice meeting you both."

With that, she turns to head back towards the path and towards the East Shroud.

She’ll focus herself in on adventuring work, as everyone seems to call it. She’ll help people out as best as she can, and try not to think of the oh-so-familiar mask-and-cloaked man, or Hydaelyn’s words.

She trusts Venat. If Venat - or Hydaelyn - is telling her that she'll get her answers if she does as she's always done, she'll do what she's always done. No matter how many years it's been, she knows how to help people who need it, even without her magick.

This much, she can do.

Notes:

Buckle in, this is gonna be a long one. It's planned out through Endwalker, and I'm going to do everything I can to try and get there. Tags will be added as the story progresses - I've tried to tag for ARR for now.

Many many many thanks to eriyu for tirelessly listening to me ramble about this story and helping me plan out the entire thing. This wouldn't exist without her. <3